The Twelve Days of Christmas

Taking elements from Star Trek, but not entirely based on. Made up species, too.

Summary: Yuugi is a lieutenant on an Earthen star ship, going on shore leave for his Christmas vacation, intent on spending the whole month offered him simply relaxing away from all human contact. However, his plans are changed when the captain decided to turn it into a learning experience, paring up the entire crew in groups of four. The even worse damper, they get to log all of their interactions with a newly met race. Yuugi unwittingly becomes bonded to one of them, spending the last twelve days of Christmas with one of the oddest, most frightening, and life changing experiences of his time.

~ * ~

Lieutenant Motou Yuugi sat in a chair in the mess hall, begrudgingly eating his nutritional meal, number Eighty Six.

Damned captain. He had planned to fill up on nothing but turkey, mashed potatoes, and pumpkin pie his entire vacation. Away from all people contact. Being scrunched onto a rather small ship with over eight hundred people was turning out to truly get on his nerves.

But nooo, the captain just had to put a damper in his perfectly laid out vacation plans. Now he'd probably only be able to eat what he felt like on Christmas. With other people.

And he didn't even have any idea who he was going to be paired up with.

"Hey, pal! How's it going?"

Lieutenant Motou's good friend, the Elsarian Jou, sat down next to him with three meals. Yuugi shook his head. "Gods, you people eat a lot."

The blonde man shrugged, shoving a piece of blonde hair behind a pointed ear. Yuugi had always been reminded of Elves with the Elsarian, most of them possessing an impish nature and flamboyant attitude. "Yeah, well, that's what happens when you get stuck with earth food that has no substance to it."

The Lieutenant poked at his food. "This is not earth food. This is garbage that was recycled for dogs. We only get stuck with it because the dogs wouldn't eat it." He dropped his fork. "So tell me, Ensign, just what are you doing for the shore leave? You're not staying on the ship, are you?"

"Eustake, no! I'm gonna go see just what this Gaia of yours looks like."

Yuugi recognized that strange word as the Elsarian word for the Underworld, and Gaia as the name of Earth. "Had the courage to look at the chart yet to see who you got paired with?"

Jou looked up from his flavorless food. "I take it you haven't."

Yuugi snorted. "Not bloody likely." He looked at Jou, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, I've got good news, and I got bad news."

Yuugi frowned. "Start with the good news."

"Well, the good news is that we got paired up together!" He gave a weak grin.

Yuugi was silent for a moment. "Yeah, that's good. So…what's the bad news? Who else is in our group?"

The blonde Elsarian didn't answer.

"Tell me it's not Kaiba."

"All right. I won't." He went back to his meal.

"Jou!" Yuugi cried.

"Hey, you told me to not tell you!"

The Lieutenant rubbed his face. "Well, I suppose that I'll be able to live with the Volkan for a couple of weeks. Who is our fourth partner?"

The Ensign swallowed hard. "Please don't kill me."

Yuugi's eyes grew wide. "What, is it Mazaki?"

Jou seemed to shrink into himself, squinting for the blow he was sure he was going to receive. "The captain."

Had the Lieutenant not been trained to not faint in any situation, he would have. Nor did he scream. He simply sat there, slowly starting to accept that this year was not, by any means, going to be a good Christmas. "Oh, Gods. Stuck with Captain Ishtar for one month, the unhappy Volkan Seto Kaiba, on some island that I won't be able to go surfing on."

"Uh, actually, we aren't getting the tropical paradise like some of the crew."

Yuugi looked back up again. "We're not?"

"No, uh," Jou scratched his head. "Some people laughed when I asked them about where it was, others simply looked at me with pity. Some place called 'Minnesota', on the International Falls border. You know where that is?"

Yuugi's face paled ten times whiter than chalk. "Oh, kuso. There must be a god up there right now that really, really hates me." He sighed. "Minnesota is nothing but an ice box in the winter time. People have been known to be snowed in for days, and International Falls is way up in the boonies. I don't even think there is a store around for miles." He rested his head on his hands. "So, anything else I should know about?"

"Uh, yeah. Probably. Kaiba said something about us getting a 'special mission' that has been assigned by the Earth and Outer Homes Outreach Program. We get to help a couple of 'Aldars' get acquainted to Earth life, and the daily interactions of other species on the earthen ships."

Yuugi sighed. "Thus, the Volkan, the Elsarian, and a couple of Humans. Lovely. Just wake me up when the nightmare is over, 'kay?"

"'Kay." Jou went back to his meal.

~ * ~

Lieutenant Motou stood impatiently at the window, tapping his foot incessantly. Just how long did it take?

The snow was falling heavily outside, the cold so bitter it was filtering in through the thick, double paned glass.

Ensign Jou snored rather loudly off to the side, slumped haphazardly into a small airport seat. Yuugi sighed, wishing he could get some much needed sleep too, only in a nice, soft bed secluded from meddlesome captains and troubled crew members.

Yuugi, Jou, and the silent Seto were currently waiting inside of Duluth's international airport, waiting for their captain to pick up the two Aldars that would be coming their way for the whole of their shore leave. So far, Captain Ishtar had been gone for almost twenty minutes, and there were still no signs of him anywhere.

"You know, Lieutenant, that impatience won't speed things up any faster."

Yuugi scowled in Ensign Kaiba's direction. "Damned Volkans," he muttered.

"We have good hearing, too."

Lieutenant Motou felt his blood start to boil, fighting with himself and desperately trying to remember that killing was a ver, very bad thing. He thought idly to himself. Stress. The confusion created when one's mind overrides the body's basic desire to choke the living shit out of some asshole where desperately deserves it.

This brought a small smile to his lips. His mother had this saying framed and hanging over her desk at home, always reminding him that someday, if he pushed it too far, that this saying was going to fly out the window. Then he'd be in a lot of trouble.

Seto thought for a brief moment, as he stared at that small little grin, that the Lieutenant might be plotting his demise, or a torture session against him.

Humans weren't that vulgar, were they?

"I see you've been good little boys and haven't run off."

Yuugi turned blank violet eyes towards his captain. Snowflakes were still nestled in his corn-silk hair, his rather large coat covered in the cold white fluff.

Good little boys…yes, Ishtar always was such a sarcastic little thing.

"Did everything go well, Captain?" the Volkan asked, always liking to remain on the authority's good side.

"Yes, I think so. The two Aldars are on their way. Just had to stop at the rest room." Ishtar dropped his bag on the floor next to him, Yuugi swearing that he heard paper rustling around inside.

"When they get here, we'll just teleport to our cabin." He looked over at the sleeping Elsarian. "Wake him up, Lieutenant. We want to make a good impression. With that thing around, we'll have to work hard on it, though."

Oh, peachy…

Yuugi walked over and shook his shoulders roughly. He wasn't being cruel, Jou was just that hard to wake up sometimes.

Of course, he did run a close second in that department. He never was a morning person.

"Jou, wake up!"

The Elsarian snorted, rolling over just slightly. " Etanke, misatoo…midda ya no itanachiu baa…"

"Jou! Quite telling you mother that you don't want to go to school and wake up!"

The blonde man jerked violently, suddenly prying open his droopy eyes. "Oh, ah, ready to go then?"

Yuugi sighed, running his hand through his hair as Kaiba snorted with mirth behind him. "Yeah, time to go."

The Elsarian sat up, picking up his luggage with him once he finally stood. He looked around blankly, blinking a few times. "Uh, where's the Aldars?"

"Had you been awake, Ensign, you'd have heard me say that they are on their way, and that we are to make a good impression on them," the captain barked.

Jou straightened up instantly, silently cursing the rotten 'vacation.' Humans had such funny traditions.

Yuugi saw two figures beginning to head their way, carrying odd looking bags of a pure white material.

Suddenly, his mouth went slack. One of them was, undeniably, a kinder looking Captain Ishtar. The other simply had to be his own long lost twin. But…there was an air about him and his dark attire that the Lieutenant felt suddenly drawn to.

Yes, one word and one word alone was ringing through Motou's mind at that moment. 'Sex God!'

Hard crimson colored eyes blinked at their surroundings. Delicate snowflakes hung precariously on a pure black scarf, a surprisingly form fitting insulated black coat covered in drops of moisture. His body was one that any person could be jealous of. Not to mention the delicious tan that he donned.

Funny. These Aldars look exactly like we do, the Lieutenant thought.

"Hello," the captain-clone said, smiling warmly. "You must be our new companions for the next few weeks."

Yuugi blinked. As did Seto. And Jou.

The captain-clone smiled again. "My name is Malik. I am the captain of my ship, and this is my Lieutenant, Yami Tiyaku. We are very pleased to meet you."

So very cordial this person was.

"Oh, my is everything all right?" Yuugi blinked as he stared at Yami, suddenly realizing that he had forgotten to shut his mouth. "Is there still a bit of that snow substance in my hair?" Yami began to wipe his hand through his spiky hair, which was devoid of any white snowflakes.

Yuugi shook his head, jarring his thoughts back into order. "Oh, no, no snow."

"Oh good, I am very glad." He smiled.

Yuugi blinked. Then blinked again. How could someone look that attractive, and yet be that…that… oblivious? Lieutenant Motou gave a weak smile. It was the only response he could think of.

"I suppose we should be off then," Malik said, looking at Captain Ishtar for more instructions.

Jou walked up next to Yuugi, blinking in confusion. His blue eyes said it all. Are these guys for real?

"We'll be teleporting to the cabin. Just stand still, and close your eyes if you need to. It's painless, but it looks funny if you've ever had your eyes open for it," Captain Ishtar explained.

Malik clapped his hands together. "Oh, I've never teleported before. Aldars have to need for such technology. This should be exciting."

Yuugi blinked again as he looked at the big smile. Gods, they seemed so gullible!

This was going to be a ver, very long vacation. Trapped in a cabin, way up north, with absolutely no place to find solitude. And he had to log his interactions with these people? Kami-samma, if they ever found that journal!

Yuugi choked back on his groan, plastering a painful smile on his face. What a nightmare.

~ * ~

Want more? It will get better, the relationships, I mean. Lots of laughs on the way, too.