That evening it all seemed to be going well Carrie reflected. Apart from the odd warning look from Miranda, Big and her friends were as usual getting on well. She looked on at him chatting to the girls. This was Big the performer. The Big who excelled in social situations, charming the kitten heels off of Samantha and Charlotte. Carrie couldn't help thinking how confident and sexy he looked. She only realised she had been staring at him for two long when he flashed a look in Carries direction. He quickly avoided her eyes.
Frustrated she again kicked herself for whatever she had said when she was drunk. The bar was bustling with trendy, new kids to the party scene. In many of the girls she could see her 21-year-old self, fresh to the dating scene, optimistic and not looking for anything special. There was plenty of time for that. Carrie began to ponder whether much had changed for her.
A girl squealing with excitement interrupted her thoughts.
"Oh my God, Sissy Bradshaw. Look at you. Here in New York?" Carrie embraced her younger cousin happy to see her. She had last seen her a few years back when Sissy wasn't legally even allowed to drink in bars. Carrie had sneaked her into one with her own id. She kind of enjoyed being the cool cousin showing her the ways and cosmopolitans of New York. Sissy had always said Carrie was her role model.
"Yeah, I'm working up here now. I fell in love with New York when you took me out."
"That's really good to hear. We'll have to go out for lunch some time soon. Sit down, sit down." Carrie motioned for her to pull up a seat.
"So tell me... how have things been with you? How's your love life? These days I hear most of your gossip from your article!"
Carrie looked over at Big hoping he wasn't paying attention to the conversation. He wasn't looking at them but she had a feeling he was listening.
"You know, all quiet. I'm loving the single life." She boasted masking her true feelings. To everyone else but those who new her best, she was independent, single and loving it Carrie. She didn't need a man.
Sissy gave her an odd sort of smile. Was it sympathy? Carrie felt herself getting a little defensive.
"So, tell me about your love life!!" she decided it was best to turn this conversation around briskly.
Sissy bit her lip and smiled "Well, I have the best news…", pausing dramatically.
"She's met a new guy," Carrie thought. "Probably her first serious relationship. How cute,"
An attractive male behind Sissy suddenly caught Carrie's eye. Just as she was about to point him out she realised he was approaching their table.
"Good timing!" exclaimed Sissy. "Carrie, I want you to meet my fiancé." She was beaming.
Carrie almost spat out, "Your too young." But fortunately she caught herself in time.
"Congratulations" she said through a fixed smile, shaking his hand as Sissy introduced them. What was going on? Her 22 year old cousin was getting married. And there Carrie sat alone with the closest thing she'd had to a long-term relationship sitting across the table unable to commit to a desert never mind marriage. The brutal truth of the matter was that she was getting old, single and desperate. She wondered where the Carrie had gone who gave her cousin advice about boys. She felt a panic rising in her throat.
"Excuse me, I need to get some air," She ran out of the bar and inhaled the fresh air. As she sat down on the sidewalk she held her head in her hands. She heard someone sitting down beside her and then felt an arm around her shoulder.
"Honey, what's going on?"
It was Miranda.
At the sight of her friend Carrie's composure left her. "I'm going to end up alone. An old spinster. I'll be the weird old woman, standing at the bar, drinking martini's alone and talking to herself."
"Oh, come on, you know that isn't true. I'll be right there beside you checking out the barman."
Carrie giggled slightly.
"Seriously Carrie, you've got plenty of time to find the right person."
"Miranda, the only man I want is Big."
"You don't know that yet. You haven't sampled them all."
Carrie giggled. It began to rain. "C'mon lets get back in. We're going to end this night in style."
"I'm not in the mood anymore."
"Yes, you are. I'm buying you a cosmo and stop being so melodramatic. You're only 34 for crying out loud, you're not 50 yet. Hell, you're younger than me!!"
Carrie smiled sheepishly and walked back into the bar. One happy thought was with her. She knew her friends would always be there for her.
********Okay, I know it's been a long time coming but that was chapter 6. Stay tuned for 7…the finale!!!