Push You Off A Cloud

Chapter 1

The Noose

By: Rachel*

Rated: PG-13

Genre: Drama/Romance

E-mail: PeachGirlKiley@aol.com

Web Address: www.Spike-Faye-Shrine.cjb.net

Here it is. A new fic! It's funny at first, but you might start crying at parts with this one, don't worry I don't like the depressing endings, so you won't have to worry about things like that with me… Anyway, if you have a MP3 downloader like ARES (no spies = you don't get sued!) you should download any and all songs by A Perfect Circle! They're really great. I love all their songs, some other good ones are 3 Libras, and my personal favorite for the crazy beat at the end is Sleeping Beauty! *-* Such a cool crazy beat at the end! Download it and tell me what you think! Also don't forget to tell me what you think of this fic! READ + REVIEW!

Disclaimer: I Don't Own Cowboy Bebop, nor the song The Noose.

The Noose



So glad to see you well
overcome and completely silent now
with heaven's help
you cast your demons out

And not to pull your halo down
around your neck and tug you off your cloud
but I'm more than just a little curious
How you're planning to go about
Making your amends to the dead
...To the dead

Recall the deeds as if they're all
Someone else's atrocious stories
now you stand reborn before us all
so glad to see you well

And not to pull your halo down
Around your neck and tug you to the ground
But I'm more than just a little curious
How you're planning to go about
Making your amends to the dead
...To the dead

With your halo slipping down
Your halo's slipping
Your halo's slipping down
Your halo's slipping down
Your halo's slipping down

Your halo's slipping down to choke you now

            Faye shuttered, as she rolled onto her side, and curled in her knees. Tears rolled off her nose and cheeks landing silently onto the cold metal floor. She screamed, and clawed at the ground letting the tears roll off her cheeks. She gritted her teeth as two of her nails on her right hands snapped back. "No…" She whispered. She cried her voice echoed in the halls. Her violet locks hung in her eyes. They stuck to her face mixing with the salty tears.

            "He's gone Faye…" Jet stated again. His face was shadowed and solemn. "You can stay as long as you wish, but know he won't be coming back…I'll have funeral preparations made for tomorrow." Taking in a deep sigh, Jet turned heel, and walked towards the kitchen.

            Faye's eyes narrowed as her lower lips trembled. "Come back Spike…You can't die, you can't!" She cried out, and pounded her fist into the floor wrapping her other arm around her stomach.

++++++

            White surrounded him. A bright white, illumines light, and that was all. "I'm alive?" Spike whispered. He was dressed in his usual garb. Taking in a breath he cautiously walked into the light. "Hello, is anyone there?" Spike poked his head around.

            "Hey…" Spike jumped in surprise, and turned around to come face to face with Shin. Spike's brown eyes widened. "You…you died." Spike whispered, he straightened his posture, and backed away.

            Shin smirked, and bowed his head. "So did you…" Shin laughed as Spike's face paled. "Welcome to the Golden Gates." Shin pointed up and low and behold there were a tall set of gold gates which a sign, placed at face level read, 'Golden Gates' in fine print.

            Spike yelped as he started to float down into the mass of white. "Shin, help!" Spike; strew his arms about as Shin laughed.

            "Calm down, you're not going to fall to your death…you're already dead, you wouldn't feel anything." Shin sighed.

            Spike calmed down as he floated back up to the surface of the white floor. "This is a cloud, isn't it?" Spike walked to the edge and was rudely jerked back. His brown eyes widened." Shin waved his arms around and rolled his eyes.

            "Yes, and don't do that…You'll fall straight to hell." Spike nodded his head. "Anyway, they thought you'd like to know some things before you make any big afterlife dictions.

            Spike rippled his lips together, the dry hummer wasn't amusing. "Like what?"

            Shin sighed. "Come over here with me…" Shin walked towards the gates and then turned to the left. His eyes closed and he whispered something. When Shin opened his eyes the white vapor moved in all directions revealing a golden elevator. Shin hit the down button that glowed against the gold panel. He stepped in as the doors opened.

            "What's this, a trip to hell?" Spike smirked, amused by his joke. He coughed when Shin didn't respond.

            "It's a trip to the past forth months." Shin grimaced. "You've been dead and buried already Spike…I thought you'd like to know how some people are dealing with this, especially one person has been greatly affected..." Spike looked at the golden floor as he stepped inside and looked out the window as Shin pressed in certain date.

++++++

            Faye was dressed in a skirt that reached down to her knees and a long sleeved top. All were black. She held a tissue to her face as they lowered the casket to the ground. It was just Jet and her attending the funeral. "Spike," Faye stepped closer to the grave. The priest lowered his head, and let them greave for Spike on their own.

            Jet sighed, tossing a red rose on top of the black colored coffin. "Faye, I'll be in the car." Jet waited for her to respond. She nodded and stumbled forward.

++

            The doors opened to this sight. Spike stepped out and with Shin he watched Faye and listened to her words to him…

++

            "Damn you…" She closed her eyes and two new tears streaked down her cheeks. Her body shuttered, and she fell to her knees. Bringing her hands to her face she let out a cry. Pulling at her hair she threw the white rose onto the coffin. "You said you weren't going there to die!" She grabbed a rock from the ground and hurled it at the grave stone. A small piece chipped. "I hate you!" She screamed and threw another rock. She missed and Jet came running up behind her and grabbed her arms.

            "Faye, settle down, let him rest—"

            "No! No, I don't want him to rest! He said he wouldn't die!" Faye fell onto her side tears spilling over her eyes. Her voice screeched out another cry. "I love you…you can't die." Jet's blue eyes grew in size as he heard her muffled words. He pretended not to hear and backed away.

            "Come one Faye, I'll buy you a drink." Jet took hold of her hand and helped Faye to her feet. She stared at the grave for one more moment.

            "Goodbye Spike…" She shuttered at her words and blocked them from her mind. Her balance wasn't good. She kept teetering from side to side and Jet had to wrap his left arm under her arms to keep her from falling.

++

            Spike stared in a daze. His thin lips were parted, and his eyes stared on as Faye walked away. Walking closer he looked at his gravestone. "Rest in peace Spike…" He took a breath and stared at the ground. "May you always…" He stopped and looked back at Faye his eyes filled with an emotion Shin had never seen in Spike before. Shin stared for a moment then looked away. "…Keep on dreaming." Spike fell backwards and landed on the ground with a thud. "Why'd you show me this?" His eyes were dark. "I didn't need to see this." He gritted his teeth.

            Shin swallowed. "I'm afraid that you did…we're not done yet though Spike." Shin watched as Spike's body tensed.

            "I don't want to see more, don't show me anymore…take me back Shin. I'm ready to be dead—"

            "She's going to die Spike." Shin covered his mouth and swallowed looking up at the blue sky. The words settled and formed an ominous feel around the two of them.

            Spike stared at Shin and then looked at his grave. "What do you mean she's going to die?" He spoke sharply.

            Shin closed his eyes. "I can't say anymore. I'm going to get yelled at for saying that much. Come on…" Shin waved him to the elevator, and Spike nodded, standing he felt a wave of dizziness wash over him. He was dead, so why'd he feel sick?

            Shin guided Spike inside the elevator and pressed the up button they paused at when they reached Earth's present. Spike blinked as Shin pressed up again. He waited to let go until the meter read twenty minutes in future and then let go.

++++++

            Faye sat on the bathroom floor tears in her eyes. She shuttered, and finished off the rest of her bottle of rum and tossed it into the tub. It smashed she listened as the pieces shattered. It had been three months since Spike's death. Three months of relentless hell for her. She wanted to die, she couldn't take the nightmares, the sinking feeling that he was standing behind her, watching her, when in fact there was no one there. "Spike, I'll be with you soon." She slurred her words and wiped her tears from her green eyes.

            With shaking hands she picked up her razor, complete with a new blade and looked at it with her hands. She brushed over the blades and flinched as it cut into her finger. She grimaced and sucked on her finger. Sighing she shut her eyes tightly and let out a whimpered cry as she drew the blade close to her wrist.

++

            Spike's brown eyes grew wide after the elevators opened and his eyes fell upon this sight. "Faye, stop!" Spike screamed and ran forward. He reached out to grab the razor, but his fingers slipped right through it. Spike's lips parted. "Make her stop!" Spike turned back to Shin. His eyes were closed as he shrugged his shoulders. Spike's eyes were pleading for him to do something.

            "All we can do is watch…" Shin frowned.

            Spike gritted his teeth. His eyes were desperate as the blade made contact with Faye's skin. She cried out and pressed down hard cutting deep into her wrist. Spike turned away, and fell to his knees. He covered his ears so he couldn't hear her screams. "No, no I can't watch this; just send me to hell if that's what you want from me! Don't show me something like this, you can't!" He shook as Faye dropped the razor and let her arm fall to the floor. He looked back at her as she her eyes rolled back and shut. "No…Faye, wake up!" He walked over and tried to tap her face.

            "Spike…" She breathed, a small smile formed on her paling face. "I'll be with you, won't I?"

            Spike's brown eyes widened, and he smiled. "I'll get help, just—" He gritted his teeth as he saw the pool of blood forming around her wrist.

            Shin shook his head. "Spike, you can't help her…you're dead, no one will hear you, see you, or feel you ever again."

            Spike stood up and growled in frustration. He ran forward and shoved Shin into the wall of the Bebop's bathroom. "Shut up!" Spike punched Shin across the face and then backed away. "If you want me to keep feeling like this, just send me to hell…"

            Shin closed his eyes and looked back at Spike. "We want you to save Faye…" Shin sighed as Spike staggered back. He shook his head and stepped back a little more. Cursing under his breath, he tripped over Faye's leg, and landed the small pool of her blood. His brown eyes burned with fear as the blood got onto his arms and clothes. He panicked and jumped up to his feet.

            "Get it off me, get it off!" He shook as it slowly disappeared. "Faye…" He reached his hand out and all he did was go through her body. He gritted his teeth. His eyes blurred. "Don't die—"

            "You can still save her Spike…" Shin sighed as Spike looked back at him. "We're in the future, she hasn't killed herself yet." Shin walked Spike into the elevator and sent them back to the clouds above. "She loves you, more than you'll ever know. If you decide not to save her, she will die, and you won't see her again Spike…ever." Spike blinked.

            "Won't she be in heaven—"

            "Spike…we don't do those sorts of things for people who aren't—" Shin cut himself off. "She'll go to hell Spike. All she'll end up doing is facing the same pain she felt over and over again, for eternity. If someone kills him or herself it's like cheating their way out of a problem in your life. Cheaters never win…that's how things are around here." Spike swallowed.

            Spike's brown eyes were hazed and lifeless. His heart ached as the words ran over in his mind, repetitively. "What can I do to save her?"

            Shin smirked and looked up at Spike as they reached the Golden Gates. Escorting Spike outside Shin walked over towards the edge of the cloud. "You can't be with her forever; you must know that after things are better, you will have to leave her again." Spike grimaced, and then nodded meekly. "Anyway, you'll be alive to her. Beating heart and all; however, no one else, besides small children and animals will see you. To them you'll be a phantom, or what you knew as a ghost. If you need help, call out my name and I'll appear for assistance. You're going to scare her, so be ready to react to her response, whatever it may be. You can hold her and everything, so before you go picking her up…if you ever decide to do so, it'll look like she's floating in the air. Small children once again will see you as well as animals, however, people ten and above will not, and…we don't like those things happening."

            Spike nodded. "We?" Spike shrugged his shoulders and looked around trying to see the others that Shin was talking about.

            Shin smirked and nodded his head. "Yeah…just consider it all of heaven is saying this to you." Shin sighed. "So you want to do this, or not?"

            "What about Julia?" Shin blinked and wet his lips. Spike stared at him and looked around.

            "She won't be with you if you stay here." Shin sighed. "She jumped off the clouds a week ago." Shin frowned. "We warned her, in every way we could Spike." Spike bowed his head and clenched his fists. "She's with Vicious in hell. It was her choice…she'll be lucky if she finds him." Shin bowed his head. "What'll it be, hell, heaven, or Faye?" Shin looked up at Spike and waited for an answer.

            Spike closed his eyes. He'd lost Julia even after death. He smiled seeing Faye laughing, and teasing him. It vanished as remembrance of that horrid scene from a few moments ago came rushing into his mind. "As long as I can help Faye, I'll go to her." He nodded his head and crossed his arms. "So how do we do this?"

            Shin laughed, a twinkle of delight sparkled in his eyes. "I get to shove you off a cloud—"

            "You said I'd go to hell!" Spike shouted his eyes blazed with rage.

            "If you threw yourself off, then yes. I have permission to push you off though. You'll wake up with some pain, but nothing that'll kill you—" Shin closed his eyes tightly and shook his head. "Not funny, I know…" Spike smirked. "You'll have three minutes to get to her before she kills herself."

            Nodding Spike walked to the edge and stared down at the ground. "Okay," he turned around and looked at Shin.

            Shin's brown eyes flickered with excitement. "Hey," Spike nodded, starring back at Shin as he spoke. Shin bit down on his lower lip. "Do you love her?" Spike's eyes widened as Shin shoved his right leg into Spike's chest. "Just some food for thought!" Shin shouted as his hair blew back soon after Spike went tumbling down.

++++++

            Do you love her? Do you love her?!

Spike sat up letting out a sharp gasp of breath, and his arms and flew forward. Spike winced and rubbed his abdomen. Shin was right, he felt pain again. Looking about he noted that he was in his room. "Faye!" He scrambled to his feet and ran towards the door. Reaching his hand out, he tore through the doorway and around the corner.

++

            Jet blinked as he heard Spike's door open and slam shut. "Sleeping in there, huh Faye…?" He shook his head. "Night!" he shouted and went into this room and shut the door behind him. It'd been awhile since he'd seen her dare to even step by his room, let alone go in it.

++

            Spike stopped at the bathroom door and then knocked. He figured it best not to say anything.

            Faye drew the razor to her wrist. "What do you want?" She slurred. There was no reply. "What do you want, damn it?" Faye's tone increased. She cursed and threw down the razor. Staggering she stumbled to her feet and wiped her teary cheeks. "Jet, I swear to God, if you try and get me out of this ship one more time—" She swung the door open and stared up at a set of brown, two-toned eyes.

            "They pushed me off my cloud…" Spike closed his eyes and bowed his head smirking. "Did you miss me, Faye?" He turned back and stared into her emerald green eyes.

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