Magic Kaito is owned by bunches of people who ain't me.

This fic was written by me. Christmas fic for Icka.


Saguru was having a bad day.

Firstly, he had come home the night before to be greeted by a dancing, plastic Santa with a Kaitou Kid monocle, belting out "Jingle Bell Rock", with the Kid's latest target dangling from his hand.

Secondly, it was Christmas, and he was homesick. Homesick for England and a proper Christmas, with a proper Christmas tree -- a REAL Christmas tree, not a plastic one, and certainly not any color but green, as Nature intended Christmas trees to be -- and proper stockings hung before the fire and a proper Christmas dinner with turkey and roast beef and a proper plum pudding, flaming in brandy, with a proper sixpence waiting for someone unwary to bite into it and have a proper emergency visit to the dentist the next day. Or the day after. In England you had Boxing Day, where you could properly recover from Christmas. And proper gifts spilling around the tree and a proper midnight service on Christmas Eve, in an old church with a proper choir singing proper Christmas carols.

Instead he was in Japan, and staring glumly at a plastic atrocity pretending to be something evergreen. You couldn't even call it fake pine. He doubted the person who stuck the fake plasticky needles on it had ever seen a fir tree, or a pine tree, or anything evergreen, in all their life. It sat on his table and leered at him. It had fiber optic threads in it, and revolved slowly on its stand with a noise like ... well, a fiber optic revolving plastic Christmas tree. He did have presents, he knew. But it wasn't the same.

He turned off the tree, vicious snapping the switch. He could have gone to England with his mother, but he'd decided to stay with his father -- who'd had to leave town unexpectedly. He was alone on Christmas. He didn't even had a Kid case to think about.

The doorbell rang. And then it rang again, in some idiot's attempt to apparently play Jingle Bells on his innocent doorbell. Saguru sighed and got up, went to the door, opened it, stared at Kuroba grinning maniacally at him and tried to shut it again.

"Ow," said Kuroba, but kept his foot in the door.

"Go AWAY."

"Don't wanna, ain't gonna. Lemme in."

"No, Kuroba."

"My mother made sugar cookies," said Kuroba. "And I've got twenty of them right here." He somehow managed to branish a large shopping bag.

Saguru let him in. Kuroba was Kuroba, but sugar cookies were sugar cookies, even if nobody in Japan seemed to be able to make them quite right. "What do you want?"

Kuroba managed to look angelic and innocent and hurt that Hakuba could think that Kuroba WANTED anything besides the pleasure of Saguru's company. Saguru considered kicking him back out, but, well, sugar cookies. "I just thought," said Kuroba, "Seeing as it's Christmas and you're a foriegner, I'd bring you something. They DO give people presents in England, don't they?" His tone implied that people in England, being an uncilivized country, might still paint themselves blue with woad -- not that Kuroba probably knew what woad was, but with Kuroba you just never knew -- and perform savage dances to convince the sun to come back. As opposed to getting up at three am to go to temples and bang on enormous drums to drive away demons.

"Yes," said Saguru, trying not to grind his teeth, "They do." He had money. He could be on a plane to England right now, toward a proper Christmas and away from classmates who were definitely thieves and had broken into his house the night before to set up singing Santa figures just to mock him.

And to return a valuable jewel, but trying to figure out what Kuroba thought, or did, gave even him a headache.

Kuroba set the bag down, looking insufferably pleased with himself.

"Why aren't you with Nakamori-san?" asked Saguru.

"Aoko? Oh, she spends Christmas with her dad. Has since her mom died."

Another piece of the puzzle about the Kid clicked into place. "Lucky the Kid never sends out notices between December 20th and January 2nd, then," he said, casually.

Kuroba didn't even flinch, but he did turn slightly, very slightly, pink. "Hey, thieves have got families, too," said Kuroba, cheerfully. "Poor bugger's probably got better things to do than try to steal things in this awful weather. Anyway, Mom's expecting me. Happy Christmas and all that."

Saguru, by an effort of will, did not correct Kuroba's pronounciation. "Er," he said. "Thank you, Kuroba."

"Don't mention it," said Kuroba, cheerfully. "See you 'round."

Saguru watched him leave. For some reason, even without seeing what Kuroba had actually brought him, he felt like he'd gotten something he'd wanted, without even knowing that he'd wanted it.

"Merry Christmas, 1412," he said quietly, shut the door on Kuroba's retreating figure, and went back to the warmth inside.


Originally KK was going to put one of those singing plastic fish in Hakuba's house, and then I remembered. KK and fish. Eeep.

Merry Christmas, Icka! Behold my complete inability to think up anything like a decent ending! .;;