Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters, but I'm not trying to make any money off this so I guess it's OK then.
This is a Ranma continuation and multi-cross-over with Sailor Moon, Tenchi Muyo!, Mermaid Saga, Ah Megami-sama and Mamono Hunter Yohko.
This is my first time writing a fan fiction, so please review and tell me what you think.
Ranma Crossing Over to the Wild Side
By Paul Bennett a.k.a. Shadowbakasama
Chapter 14a: Lunch: All you can eat Ramen and Okonomiyaki
The old priest was showing the three lovely young ladies where to set out the food and set up the griddle on the back porch and trying to work up the nerve to ask them to be shrine maidens. But frankly the Amazon and the chef intimidated him. He wasn't sure what to make of the pretty waitress in the beautiful kimono, if he wasn't watching her she just seemed to disappear occasionally then reappear nearby. The ancient creature on a stick really scared him. Now he knew why Ranma had asked if Yosho was shrunken and wrinkled.
Once the Chinese food was set out and the grill was lit Akura steps inside and tells his guests that lunch is ready on the back porch and asks, "Where is Ranma and the other girls?"
"I sent Ranma to get washed up about 15 minutes ago. He should have come out by now." Nodoka tells him. "I think Nabiki-chan is gossiping with Rei-chan and her friends back in her bedroom. You don't suppose that Ranma is doing something manly with the four girls do you?"
Akura gets red in the face imagining four girls and Ranma, then remembers that one of them is his granddaughter. His face is now going past red into purple and he runs past Nodoka and Katsuhito heading for Rei's bedroom, imagining the worst. (Which is a pretty interesting picture of group flexibility that would fit well in the Kama Sutra, the old priest reputation as a hentai is deserved it seems.)
Rei clutched Ranma's right arm to her chest and looked towards Nabiki and her camera waiting for the flash while Minako clutched Ranma's left arm and Ami leaned backwards into his chest posing for the group picture when Rei's grandfather burst into the bedroom with a thunderous look on his purple face just in time for the flash.
"What are you kids doing in here?!" Akura yells as he enters the room.
"GRAMPS!" Rei growls "You ruined the shot!
Seeing that all the girls were wearing clothes, and looking at him with vengeful eyes, he decides to back off. "Heh heh, sorry. Just my overactive imagination." He apologizes backing up to the door. "Uhm, lunch is here. Bye." And he's off like a shot.
"Well, that ruined the mood." Nabiki says putting away her camera. "Lets go have lunch and let you girls meet Shampoo and Ukyo."
"Oh joy! Did you order explosive food this time Nabiki?" Ranma snidely remarks.
"Ha ha." Nabiki fake laughs. "But seriously, I expect that Shampoo has already told Ukyo that they get to share you." 'Besides, who knew they could bake explosives into food.' Nabiki thinks to herself. 'No one thought of searching inside the food for weapons.'
"And how would she know that I would suddenly accept multiple wives?" Ranma asks Nabiki suspiciously.
Nabiki just hold out her hand and asks for "500 yen."
Ranma glares at the mercenary and tells her "Just take it out of my share." as he crosses his arms across his chest.
"Oh right." Nabiki says pulling her hand back as she realizes that she owes Ranma money for a change. "Well, Shampoo was listening to us last night when we were discussing your fiancees with your family. Apparently your mother's clan is polygamous."
"Polygamous means that you can have more than a single wife, Ranma-kun." Ami explains.
"Exactly. Don't worry too much Saotome. We came up with a plan to cut down the number of wives you have to have to keep your honor intact." Nabiki adds. "The easy ones to get rid of are your Amazon wives Ling-Ling, Lung-Lung, Lotion, and Perfume, unless you've already consummated your marriage with any of them."
"Ranma, have you slept with any of those Amazons!?" Rei asks interrupting him.
"Hell no! The only Amazon I've slept with is Shampoo." Ranma yells in his defense.
"You've slept with Shampoo!!" Ranma's three wives yell at him.
"Hey hey! She keeps sneaking into bed with me while I'm asleep." Ranma answers while backing away from the angry girls.
"Do you sleep in the nude?" Rei asks.
"Not with Nabiki around with a camera and cold water." Ranma says glancing at Nabiki who was just changing out the film in her two cameras.
"So then you're still a virgin?" Minako asks.
"Yeah, but just barely." Ranma replies. "One time Shampoo cornered me in the furo as a cat, then she jumped in and changed into a girl right on top of me. I figure if Akane had been a few seconds slower busting in on us ... uh, well ... you get the idea."
"Don't worry, that won't be a problem much longer Ranma-kun." Ami drawls in a husky voice, drawing shocked stares from her co-wives Rei and Minako.
"That's right!" Minako exclaims realizing that she could get into the action if she acts quickly. "A stud like you shouldn't have a cherry like that, and we can help you bust that nut!"
Rei face palmed and Ami turned beet red as their mutual friend mangled a really bad pick-up line, while Nabiki was thinking about keeping a micro-tape recorder on when around Minako to catch these ... uh ... vocalized brain farts for posterity or blackmail.
Ranma broke up this tense scene by reminding them of lunch being ready with a deep throated growl emitted from his stomach.
Out on the porch as the others were helping themselves to the Chinese food and placing orders for their okonomiyaki, Ayeka was looking over Shampoo and thinking of how her hair reminded her of her mother's and sister's hair, and that she hadn't seen that shade of blue hair on any earth humans before.
Shampoo seeing her interest asks, "You like Shampoo's hair, yes?"
"Uhn, yes. I haven't seen any other people around her with that color of hair." Ayeka replies.
"Hmm, it make sense, Amazon's not have this color or your color until the daughters and sons of Blossom." Shampoo tells her. "Shampoo's cousin Ling Ling have same color as your hair and can also trace lineage back to Blossom. We get five new colors from Blossom, blue, light blue, purple, green, and pink hair only in those descended from Blossom, others have to make due with the usual black, brown, red, blue-black and blonde."
"And how does this make sense?" Ayeka asks. "I don't see any connection."
"Is simple Princess, the daughters and sons of Blossom were your nieces and nephews." Shampoo informs her, bowing to her great to the twentieth power aunt.
Ayeka was stunned by this news, but upon thinking of it realized that her brother Yosho had been on this planet for 700 years and could have had many human wives in that time. But how did Shampoo know about her?
#Snap# went her fingers. "You're the one that turns into a cat!" Ayeka exclaims. "You were spying on us last night."
"Princess is very smart, also very nice. Shampoo thanks you for the Sukiyaki beef last night, was very tasty."
"Ahhh, don't mention it." Ayeka replies embarrassed that she had been petting and feeding a girl rather than a cat last night. 'I guess it would be odd for the Tendos to have a cat with an Ailurophobic in the house.' She thought to herself as she took a bowl of ramen for herself.
"Regarding spies, Shampoo ask about three girls in woods watching us?"
"Friends of the Rei-san, the shrine maiden here. We've been ignoring them all morning." Ayeka replies without glancing at the three teenage girls in the bushes. "Even had to draw Neko-chan away from them a few times."
Lying down behind some bushes, three teenage girls watched the happenings at the Hikawa Shrine.
"Wow, look at all that great looking food." The odangoed blonde whines hungrily.
"Quiet Usagi, you don't want them to hear us do you?" Hisses the girl with shoulder-length red hair.
"Naru's right Usagi, besides you just finished off the bento that I bought for us." Makoto whispers.
"But that fresh Okonomiyaki that the cute boy is making looks so good." Usagi replies.
Naru and Makoto both look at Usagi with that 'Are you stupid?' look.
"What?" Usagi demands in a whisper.
"That's Kuonji Ukyo, possibly the best Okonomiyaki chef in Tokyo, and one of Saotome Ranma's other fiancees." Makoto tells her.
At Usagi's incredulous look Naru whispers "Crossdresser." in Usagi's ear.
Katsuhito was looking over the toppings beside the grill trying to decide what to have on his okonomiyaki and asks, "How much for a shrimp okonomiyaki with the spicy sauce?"
"Family discount is always free honored Grandfather, requiring a common ancestor in three generations including in-laws." The chef replies with a smile as she starts another spot of batter on the grill.
The old man was shocked at getting a wonderful Kuonji-cooked okonomiyaki for free, in times long past he had paid almost ruinous prices for the delicacy he was getting for free today. "I once helped drive bandits away from a Kuonji yattai and only received a 30 discount for a week. I had to instruct the chef in new martial techniques to get the price down to something I could afford. Even then I ended up chopping wood for him to get a decent price."
Ukyo was shocked to hear this story, since she knew the story as well. "But Honored Grandfather, our prices have come down tremendously since that winter 200 years ago when my ancestor Kuonji Hiro stopped at the Masaki Shrine by the Demon Ryoko's Cave for a week. Why it's even said that he offered the demon a free okonomiyaki when and if she could come out of her cave and collect it."
Then the woman with stiff, spiky cyan hair spoke up. "I hope your going to honor his marker girl, cause I've been waiting to try one of those ever since Hiro set up his cart right outside of my cave. And this old man would tease me something terrible about how good Kuonji okonomiyaki is by eating it right there where I could see it."
"Of course I'll honor his marker, he was my great-great ... uh whatever grandfather. So Ryoko isn't it? What will you have?"
"Hmm, how about a large spicy beef, and a medium with pork and shrimp."
"Of course, that'll be 850 yen sugar." Ukyo replies with a smile.
"What!? But Hiro said/" Ryoko exclaims before being interrupted.
"He only promised one free okonomiyaki to the demon of the cave. The second is full price."
"Fine, fine, give me a sec." The demon Ryoko says then turns to the young girl with spiny red hair behind her in line. "Uh Washu-chan, I'm a bit short, could you buy me an okonomiyaki?"
"Of course dear, just one condition." Washu replies smirking expectantly.
"But, but." Ryoko sputters as Washu waits, then she gives in and asks. "Please Mom?"
"Just put the second one on my bill." The red-head tells Ukyo.
"Wow! And you look so young!" Ukyo exclaims in shock.
"Why thank you." Washu says smiling cutely. "I take care of my appearance, unlike some who've just let themselves go for the last 700 years."
"I still look fine!" Ryoko yells at her mother. "And besides I was stuck in a cave!"
Ukyo places a finished okonomiyaki on a plate in front of Katsuhito and says, "Here you go Grandfather."
"Yeah, about that. When did one of mine marry a Kuonji?" He asks in curiosity.
"About half an hour ago, or in the next few minutes if he knows what's good for him. Depends on which one and which kiss you want to count." She replies with a smirk and a twinkle in her eye as she finishes topping two other okonomiyaki on her grill.
"Ah, the Amazon girl is making her move this soon." He remarks. "Smart girl, one of them got me about the same way." Seeing the chef giving him a questioning look he continues. "My third wife was an Amazon, the way she got me in the end was by seducing my second wife."
Ukyo gapes at him for a second in shock before shrugging. "Well at least we're not fighting over him anymore, I got the idea awhile ago that she wouldn't have taken losing well."
"Not unless they've changed their laws recently." Katsuhito replies somberly.
"Yeah, that's what I figured. Shampoo's already cursed, I don't want to know what's next." Ukyo answers. "Of course I couldn't afford to lose either."
"Best outcome would be me living out my life as a man after having my revenge on Ranma and his dad for stealing my dowery and abandoning me by the side of the road when I was six." Ukyo tells him in a whisper.
The elder Masaki makes a sad face at hearing that. Ryoko and Washu both stare at her a little shocked until Ukyo breaks the moment by asking "OK, Washu-chan right? What'll you have on yours?"
Rei's Grandfather finally cornered the pretty okonomiyaki waitress as she took a break after finishing setting up the toppings. She had given him a real chase so far ... well not really, he just couldn't keep track of her very well. But now she was resting against a tree sipping from a can of juice.
"You're such a kawaii girl. Wanna work part-time as a shrine maiden?" The lecherous old priest says flirting shamelessly with the waitress.
"Hmm. It depends on if Ukyo-sama moves her okonomiyaki-ya to this area." 'She' replies demurely. "Where Ranma-sama decides to live next will be the deciding factor."
"Why is that?" Akura asks in curiosity.
"Ranma-sama's wives will both want to stay very close to him, and he has two new fiancees in this area." Konatsu answers.
The priest had to stop and think about what he had just heard. Ranma had two wives when his marriage just yesterday was blown up and failed. Then there was the mention of two new fiancees, while he only knew of one, his granddaughter Rei. Deciding he needed more information he asks, "I thought that Ranma's wedding yesterday was a complete bust. So how does he have two wives?"
"Oh, that's because of Amazon marriage laws." Konatsu explains. "No ceremony or paperwork required apparently, just the 'Kiss of Marriage'. According to them Ranma has been married to Shampoo-san for over a year, and now, rather than keep trying to have Ranma-sama to herself, she has decided to marry Ukyo-sama as well. Why she gave Ukyo-sama the Kiss of Marriage just before we came up the steps."
"Uh, yeah. Well what about the two new fiancees then?" Rei's grandfather asks fishing for more information. "I know about my granddaughter Rei of course, but who is the other new fiancee?"
"A cousin of the Tendo girls, Ami-san I think. She came here with Nabiki-san from what I heard." Konatsu responds uncertainly. "I've met her before, she's really smart and has short blue hair."
"I know her, she is a friend of Rei's." He says looking back to the house just in time to see Ranma come out with three girls in close proximity. "I just hope they can stay friends after this."