To Have Loved and Lost
By: yagottaluvit

A/N: This is my first fic. I hope you like it. Also note that I am not a professional typist or editor so I will not have every thing perfect, so don't correct me on every mistake. Please R&R!

Disclaimer: I do not own anything Harry Potter related Ms. JK Rowling has that privilege. However I do own umm well I'll put it up in future chapters, I don't want to reveal who or what just yet.

~Chapter One: Home Again~

Hermione Granger climbed the stairs and surveyed her room. God, it felt good to be home. She laid down on her bed and looked up at the ceiling. The year's events at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry ran through her head.

"The year went well." She thought. She smiled just remembering. "Sure is good to be home, though. I can't wait for dad to get home. I can't believe he couldn't get off of work." She shrugged her shoulders, reminding herself not to be so selfish.

"Hermione!" her mum's voice drifted up the stairs. "Get down here and help me get your trunk up these stairs!" Hermione jumped up, "Whoops!" she thought to herself before running from her room and bounding down the stairs.

"Sorry, mum. I kinda got caught up in coming back home." She said, sighing. "Yes, home it is." She thought. She then grabbed the end of her trunk nearest to her and her mum did the same. They hoisted it up. Somehow the trunk had become heavier over the course of the year.

Upon reaching her room, they dropped the trunk and dragged it in. Hermione immediately began to unpack her things. She realized that she was being a neat freak, but organization always seemed sort of, well, therapeutic. Her mom, seeing that she was settling back in, left the room.

Her movements became rhythmic: first to her trunk, then to where the item belonged. Here to there. Always moving. Her Gryffindor robes were hung up in the back of her closet, all the pajamas were put into her laundry basket, so on and so forth. Soon all that was left in her trunk were her books, parchment, and quills. She closed the lid and pushed the trunk to the end of the bed. She picked up her wand(which she had left out, obviously) and locked magically. "Not from me will any muggle learn Hogwarts' secrets," she thought.

With all that finished, she looked up at her reflection in the mirror. A few strands of unruly curls had streamed onto her forehead and cheeks. The rest of her hair remained in a messy bun. She was dressed in muggle clothes, of course. Light blue jeans with a soft pink Abercrombie tee. Her eyeliner was slightly smudged, giving off a sexy, wild look.

It felt so weird to be devoid of her Hogwarts uniform and robes. In fact, with her trunk all locked up she felt empty of all magical ability that she had ever had. She loathed the feeling it made her feel so cut off from the magical world, her world. The world she knew and loved.

Shrugging her shoulders she tried to rid herself of the cold feeling. "Come on now. Get a grip. The world is not going to end just because I left Hogwarts. I lived the first 11 years of my life as a muggle and did just fine." "Hahaha," laughed Hermione. "I'm giving myself a pep talk. I better get a grip." Thinking for a second she realized what she should do. Movies. Yeah, movies.

Then her heart sank. Who would she have to go with? It had been such a long time since she had had many good friends in the muggle world. "Welllll," she thought, "there is still Jen." "Yeah, Jen," she announced. "She is always willing to help out and get me a date. Yep, it's time to give her a ring."

Then before she could change her mind she grabbed her celly off of her dresser. She went through the numbers quickly seeing how she didn't know many people wjho knew what a phone was let alone how to use it. She dialed Jen's number on her home line and sat down on her bed. The house was silent and all she could hear was the ringing of the phone and her heart beating inside her ribcage. The constant sound was interrupted only by Jen picking up her phone, and Hermione's heart jumping into her throat. (A/N: I know that technical way to do this is a separate paragraph for each time the speaker changes, BUT right I am too lazy so just bear with me here)


Jen: Hey!

Hermione: Hey! What's up?

Jen: Hermione!?!?! Is that you?? Oh my God!! It's been forever! How
you doin'?

Hermione: I'm good. But can you do me a favor?

Jen: Yeah go ahead.

Hermione: Can you hook me up with a double date tonight? I am getting bored.

Jen: Sure. I was planning on going tonight with my new boyfriend
anyway. I was going to have to drag along a family acquaintance. I
was just trying to find a date for him and well this is working out
better than I thought! He is really pretty nice and he is blonde. I
know you like 'um blonde! But I won't tell you anything else. You'll
see for yourself. We are going to see a movie at the new cinema. You
know the one? Let's see- meet you at 8?

Hermione: Sounds great. See you later! Bye.


"That went well." Said Hermione hanging up the phone. "But Jen understands my problems because she goes to a boarding school as well." She reasoned with herself. She looked down at her watch. "Oh my God! It's already 6:30! And I haven't eaten or taken a shower!" She jumped off her bed and sprinted down the stairs to eat. She quickly made herself a ham sandwich and gobbled it down. Sprinting back up the stairs, she jumped in the shower.

Stepping out of the shower she analyzed the time. "Oh shit! I won't even have time to put my hair down!" she exclaimed panic claiming her voice. She ran from the bathroom to her room. "What to wear?? What to wear??" She said, her voice becoming more panicked. She kept rummaging through her closet, and the clothes were flying everywhere. Finally she emerged with a pair of black silk capris with scrunch bottoms and a pink and black striped shirt. For shoes she wore her low black Converse All-Stars. Then without thinking she grabbed her wand and changed the shoelaces to hot pink. "Good thing that prefects are allowed to use magic. I am going to have to watch myself more closely now," she thought grimly.

Next for her hair. She blow-dried her hair and pulled it up into a simple messy bun. She briefly wondered why she never tried this style at school, but her mind was off getting ready in another place in a millisecond. Easy but cute of course. Last of all she did her make up. No foundation at night at a movie theater-not worth it. She put on smoky eyeliner beneath her lower lids, smudged slightly as it had been earlier, glitter mascara, and a slight dust of shimmering powder. Being satisfied with her appearance, she threw her celly into her purse, grabbed her keys, and jogged down the stairs. She left a note for her mom, who had gone to the grocery store, and went out the door.

Outside she drew in a big draught of cool night air. She walked slowly along the sidewalk towards her light gold Jetta. Her parents had given it to her as a 16th birthday/end of school present. She climbed in and turned up the radio. This is probably what she missed most in the wizarding world, her muggle music.

As she drove along she reacquainted herself with the music. Shortly after a commercial break, her favorite song came on. She turned her stereo system up to full blast, it was 3 Days Grace's 'I Hate Everything About You'. She drummed out the beat on her steering wheel. At the ending beats of the song she arrived at the new cinema. She whistled. It was huge.


When she had found a place to park and walked up to the front the cinema she saw Jen waving to her from a ticket line. And there were the two boys standing next to her. One of them she had known form elementary school, Zac. He had dark hair so that gave her a clue to which was to be her date. The other boy, blonde like Jen had mentioned, seemed oddly familiar.

She smiled back at Jen and jogged over to her. "Hey, Mione! Saved a place for you!" said Jen exuberantly. The line was long and she was thankful for Jen's thoughtfulness(A/N: Is that a word? No I don't think so). It was Friday night and everyone was there. People were streaming in and out of the open doors and there was a lot of pushing.

As if in slow motion the boy(the blonde one) turned around. Hermione's face contorted into a frown, but quickly she smoothed her features. Jen musn't know that the two already knew each other. But they did. Too well, for it was Draco Malfoy. Archnemesis of all Gryffindors and muggle-borns. His bright blue eyes held no emotion when they locked with Hermione's.

Jen introduced the two, just taking care of formalities, really. She could tell that there was something strange going on here. The two teens seemed to be having a staring match. However it was much more. Their two eyes were locked in silent combat as were their personalities. It only could have lasted minutes but to the group it seemed hours.

"Well," said Jen trying to break the strange silence, "what film do you guys want to see? When no one seemed to be answering she bought tickets to the show she wanted to see and the others lamely followed suit. The silence had still not ended.


Once inside the theater Hermione and Draco took seats far away from Jen and Zac so that the two magical people could not be overheard. Jen took it lightly and thought to herself, "How cute, they just met and already they want privacy." No telling what she had in mind but it certainly wasn't what was really happening with the two.

When they had taken a seat, Draco turned on Hermione and said, " What are you doing here mudblood?" he said not really waiting to hear the answer. He continued, "Jen said, she swore that I wouldn't know ' this girl'." By this time he was speaking more to himself than anything and he went on oblivious to all else, "I do know this girl. More than she knows." As if finished with his speech he looked up with a smirk upon his face. "What?? Little mudblood doesn't have any clever come backs? What a surprise." His smirk broadened seeing Hermione's enraged expression.

Quickly her eyes became icy and she was looking at him with a cold glare, "What are, you doing here Malfoy? Here in a muggle theater with 2 muggles and a filthy mudblood. Your father must be so ashamed. Did he kick you out of the house? Why didn't you go running to Pansy? She would be oh- so-willing to take you in." she finished her speech with a belligerent tone and a smirk to rival his own upon her face.

To her surprise and anger he smirked once more. "Are you that naïve, Granger? Jen's my cousin. I have to stay with her while my father is away on a business trip. She os obviously not a muggle then, eh?" He chuckled depreciatively at Hermione's startled expression, his cold grey eyes dancing at her.

"But-but-but." stuttered Hermione, unable to speak. "You-she-but-I" said Hermione still unable to make any sense whatsoever. "I-you---" she crossed her arms over her chest consenting defeat.

Draco laughed. Even more maliciously than last time at Hermione's discomfort at this newfound knowledge. "Here let me fill you in Granger." Said Malfoy visibly delighted that he knew so much that Hermione didn't. "Jen isn't a muggle. None of her family is," he stopped. He could see this was irritating Hermione because he had already informed her of this much. "She is a pureblood. Her father is a loyal Death Eater. Not as high as my father but. she is a pureblood. You know that she attends a boarding school. This school happens to be Durmstrang's." He seemed rather wistful while saying 'Durmstrang's' but he quickly snapped out of it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*In Hermione's Head*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"This whole time..Damn IT! How could I have been so blind?? It really all comes together now. The boarding school, how she knew Malfoy, everything. The only thing that seemed to be out of place was the fact that she had always seemed so genuinely friendly to me. Well, that's great Malfoy feels really great about himself now. I have to write to Harry! And Ron!"

"Makes you think, doesn't it Granger?" sneered Malfoy. He laughed that cold laugh that had recently become all too familiar. It sent shivers down her spine. It was so cold and empty of all happy emotion. She could almost feel the smirk through the darkness of the theater.

When the film ended Hermione and Draco quickly caught up with Jen and Zac, who had been sitting in the back row. Making out. They greeted the other couple cheerfully enough and Jen and Zac didn't realize that they were faking the whole happy thing. They parted with promises of bowling in the morning.

Climbing into the car many things ran through Hermione's head. "This was certainly a turn of events. Maybe for the better maybe for the worse. I hope I see Draco at the bowling alley. WHATT! No, I do not want to see Draco tomorrow. Well, just to find out more details of what is happening. It is all very strange." All these things ran through her head while driving home with her going along trying to shrug off certain thoughts. She had to keep her loyalties to Harry and Ron, her best friends. Getting into bed she grew weary and she told herself that she would figure it out another time.

A/N: There. I have written up through the 4th chapter and I am in the middle of writing the 5th chapter. Sorry for such a short chapter. All the way through the 4th chapter will be short. The 5th chapter will be longer. I am so glad that everyone liked Jen. Author's tip: Remember how happy Hermione was to be home it will come up in later chapters. To my reviewers: firediamond/stolenheart: soooo way ahead of you on that. I already read all that. Hehe. Well keep reading oh and by the way get to moving on your story. Karen: I am glad that you liked my stuff keep reviewing and umm oh yeah reading. Katie: thanks for the great review and I will have the next chapters up soon. Nadia: Don't worry. I am definitely continuing on with it. Just keep reading and reviewing. overXposed: 3 Days Grace is the greatest! You are right def. a DM/HG song. Thanks! Red of Rose: I like monkey socks I have some myself. Sorry, for that moment of stupidity. Like I said before I will have the next chapters up soon. Stephanie: Thanks a bunch. I try. Kyaukii: Thanks. I will go on just for you. LOL. Just like you said. Pokemon Trainer Charles: Since you umm are into Pokemon you are obviously reading the wrong type of thing but since I am in a good mood since like 9 of my reviewers thought I should go on with it I will just take it as a compliment. Miss Raynbow: Thanks. I am glad that you like Jen as Draco's cousin. Warning: watch out for twists in the plot. The next chapter says whether Zac is a wizard or not so you better read it and find out. lumpyliza: they are hormonal teens what do you think? Like I said to Pokemon guy up there I'll just take that as a compliment. Sayaoronsangel: Thanks. I think I'll call you my fave reviewer for the chapter. I am kinda freakish at times so I can relate. I'll email you updates for sure. I didn't think anyone would like it this much. awesomeblossom: I am glad that you enjoy my story. I didn't think grammar on here was that bad but thanks for the compliments. You are giving my english ego such a big boost. You will not be disappointed(well you might- if you are I'm sorry). Combat Babe: I am so glad you like my story. I was kind of surprised that you knew about my poetry fics. I was saying that this is my first story fic.