Title: Black and White

The title may not make sense, but it's comparisons between Harry and the other bloke. I'm not gonna write who it is, you should be able to guess.

Author: Alice aka LadyLilyPotter

Disclaimer: I don't own it. I am merely borrowing them. Simple eh?

Warnings: Slash!! You no like, you no read, capiche? Mpreg!! Oh so sweet I reckon... but you don't? OK, fair enough. Don't read. Easy eh? A/U!! This is pre OotP, cos I wanted Sirius in it. So, no mentions of anything OotP related I don't think? Snape may seem a little out of character, but he's still a snarky bastard.

Summary: Seventeen year old Harry Potter didn't know it was possible for men to get pregnant. But when the signs come together and the truth is revealed... how will he cope? Where is the father? Who is the father? And what's this about a new Dark Lord?

Rating: I dunno, PG-13, as there is only mid slash, kissing is all, and that won't be for a while I reckon. There's swearing too, and mature themes. If you think I should put up the rating tell me, and I will.

Anything else: If anyone really want's to know why the father left, I could email you, as it won't be revealed for ages. But only if your desperate. Please tell me in a review, I like reviews!! Please no flames, I reckon I warned you enough, but here's one more:


Black and White

Chapter 1: Realisations

'There has got to be a reason I keep throwing up,' seventeen year old Harry Potter thought, as he emptied his stomach for the fifth day in a row.

"Bloody hell Harry," Seamus' soft Irish accent came playing through the Gryffindor bathroom, "Are you OK? You've thrown up, what, everyday for the past week? You should go and see Madam Pomfrey, she'll give you something that'll clear it right up." Seamus and Dean both leaned into Harry's toilet cubicle and offered their hands out to him. Harry smiled weakly, took their hands, and pulled himself from the floor of the bathroom.

"I might go tomorrow Seam, if it doesn't get better, thanks," Harry replied. Dean grabbed a towel from a pile in the corner of the room and disappeared into a shower cubicle.

"Ah, right you are Harry, if you think it's best," Seamus said and he climbed into the shower.

Harry nodded and sighed. He wasn't in the mood for breakfast today, he'd likely regurgitate it anyway. 'No one would miss me anyway,' he thought bitterly, and he was certain of that. His friendship with Ron and Hermione was practically non-existent. It had simmered down to mere acquaintances over the last year. Ron and Hermione had finally become a couple over the holidays before seventh year, after a final near death experience with Harry, which resulted in Voldemorts demise. Being a third wheel, ignored half the time and worshipped the rest (For killing Voldemort_ were not high on Harry's list of priorities, so he distracted himself from everyone, willing himself not to be hurt. It hadn't worked.

Tears threatened to over flow as Harry recalled the past few weeks, 'I don't think I've ever felt any worse, 'Harry thought as the hot water ran over his body, 'I can't believe he did that to me..... after we ... maybe it was bad and that was why. Oh God I'm paranoid. Why did he leave? I loved him so much, and he just left. Where the hell he's gone is another question. Over a bloody bridge I hope. No I don't. I love him...I thought he loved me. Apparently not. What a git. He was arrogant, snobby, a complete and utter git. I'm better off without him. Arsehole. I'm glad he's gone.' But this was a lie. Harry knew it. But he wouldn't admit it to himself. All his pent up emotions were boiling up inside of him. There was noone to talk to. Noone knew in the first place. And now Harry felt so bad he barely pulled himself out of bed in the morning. In fact the only reason he got out of bed since they broke up was to throw up in the bathroom and not on the floor of the dorm room he shared with Dean, Seamus and Neville. Ron had been made Head Boy, much to Harry's disgust.

Harry threw himself into his studying for most of the year, especially since they had broken up ... 'no no can't think of him.' He'd been studying for the NEWTS which he had finished the day before last. Now during the last week of class they were learning skills deemed necessary in 'the real world'.

Glancing at his watch Harry swore loudly. He'd been thinking in the shower too long. He was going to be late for Potions in seven minutes and thirty seconds. He quickly threw some trousers on, a shirt and a robe, the water from the shower slowly seeping threw the clothes. Harry inwardly cringed and cast a wandless magic spell to dry his clothes. They quickly dried and Harry felt a lot better. He quickly strode into dorm room and pulled his Potions text from his trunk and seized his wand from his unmade bed. He didn't actually need his wand, but only a select few knew of his talent for wandless magic, and Harry wanted to keep it that way. At least if it did leak out there was no Dark Lord to find out and use to his advantage any more. Harry looked at his watch again and swore again. He hurtled through the corridors (running through Nearly Headless Nick and yelling a rushed apology), pulled the dungeon door open, and found himself face to face with Professor Snape.

'Shit shit shit," was all that was going through Harry's mind.

"Potter," Snape sneered, "20 points from Gryffindor being late. Get in, this is one lesson you don't want to miss. No, I don't want you to miss. I don't want to be teaching mini-Potters' in 11 years. I may have to kill my self first."

Harry wished he was allowed to shout at a Professor, he didn't want anything else more in the world at the moment, "Yes Sir."

Harry sighed and looked around the room. Two seats. One next to Pansy, and one on his own. Harry sighed and headed to the front of the room to the seat on his own and sat down.

"Today we will be brewing the Contraceptive Potion," - the room collectively blushed and Harry rolled his eyes - "You will make it properly. There is long enough left this term for you to fail numerous times, but you WILL make it correctly. Last thing I want is to be making this damn potion with your children.

This potion can be taken by both men and women, as I'm sure you've been told about male pregnancy. Maybe not." Snape smirked at the horrified looks - Ron, confused looks - Hermione, she obviously hadn't come across this in any books, shocked looks - the rest of the class and Harry. Snape frowned when he came to Harry Potter. The boy wore an unreadable expression on his face. It was a mixture of anguish, confusion, disbelief and nervous.

"Apparently from the looks on your faces you didn't know," Snape sneered.

'What the hell?' thought Harry, 'No. That can't be - no. It's not. No way. It must be wrong. I've just got a stomach bug. Yeah. Can't be. No ...'

Snape snorted and carried on, "I highly doubt that it is something any of you will experience. Male pregnancy is extremely rare. There hasn't been a documented case for over three hundred years. It is said that Merlin and Godric Gryffindor were products of male pregnancy, although it is not 100% certain, it is very likely. There has never been a girl born of male pregnancy though. It would take two very powerful wizards to invoke a pregnancy, and it always produces very powerful children. But enough. This potion is very important in later life, it is the most effective Contraceptive Potion there is. I highly recommend you use it."

There was a permanent blush plastered on the cheeks of nearly every one in the room. Snape smirked at them as he swept his critical gaze across the classroom. Ron and Hermione were skilfully avoiding each others gaze, Neville was just bright red - he was dating Ginny, and Seamus, usually very crude and open in matters of sex, was a pleasant pink. Harry however was very pale, almost white.

'Shite,' thought Harry 'Could I be ... no. No. I'm not that powerful. OK, maybe I am, Dumbledore said so, and he said so was ... he was powerful too... stupid git. It was once. Once. No. I'm not. It's impossible - well it's not. But..... . Shit. I'm going to the library. Shit I'm in Potions, I'll go later. Soon. I need to get this out of my head.'

"Potter!" Snape bellowed, "Get on with the potion NOW. 5 points from Gryffindor for wasting time." 'There's something up with that boy... I need to find out.'

'God I'm assuming the worse. It's probably just a stomach bug. Yep that's it. I hope. But I need to find out. Noone else will.... anyway, it's not true. So it doesn't matter. Yup.' Harry thought resolutely, and he began to prepare his lacewig wings.


"Mr Potter!" a loud shrill voice interrupted Harry's daydream during the last lesson of the day. He'd got lost in his thoughts. Again. Another time in Potions - apart from at the start of the lesson - he'd been caught by Professor Snape, and he now had a detention after dinner at 7 o'clock. The Herbology teacher had been slightly more lenient when she caught him, he only lost 10 points from Gryffindor. His depressed mind kept dragging up the worst moments in his life, images he'd tried to repress.

... the break up ...

... being shunned and ignored by Ron ....

... the first time he'd been hit by his Uncle and thrown in his cupboard ...

...Voldemort taunting him before Harry killed him, once and for all ...

"Mr Potter!" Professor McGonagall said again, loudly and disapprovingly.

"Oh, sorry Professor," Harry said and looked around. His Transfiguration Professor was standing in front of him, hands on hips, her lips thin and tight.

"Potter, are you all right? Do you want to visit Madam Pomfrey? Potter?!" McGonagall shouted. Harry had gone back in his trance.

"Oh ... no thanks Professor. I'll just do this..." Harry said and blankly looked at the person he'd been sat next to. Ron. Fuck. They hadn't spoken for what a month? Bum.

"You OK mate?" Ron said, looking at Harry appraisingly. His hair was more dishevelled than usual, his skin, normally nicely tanned, was a translucent- white colour and had bags under his eyes from lack of sleep. He looked skinnier than normal, and looked as if he could pass out or throw up any minute.

"Mate? We haven't spoken for how many weeks and you have the cheek to ask me how the hell I am? You have no right. Leave me be." Harry hissed.

"Fine." Ron said stiffly, "Vanishing charms, to vanish leftover food. Incantation is 'Vanishio', we use bread."

"Thank you so much," Harry said sarcastically.

"No need to use that tone with me. I'm your Head Boy!" Ron said, his chest swelling and his Head Boy badge shining.

"Christ," Harry said, "You sound like bleeding Malfoy... or Percy."

"How dare you?" Ron said, standing up, "I'm nothing like him. He's gone and buggered off to his Death Eater father, I am NOTHING like Malfoy!"

"You know," Harry said sneering, and he stood up, reaching his full height of 6ft tall, "You sound exactly like him. You make me sick." A wave of nausea hit Harry and his hand flew to his mouth and he fled the classroom to the nearest bathroom, leaving a startled and disgusted Ron, a stunned Professor and a lot of rather sickly Gryffindors and Slytherins.


"Professor?" Harry asked weakly.

"Potter? Are you OK?" Professor McGonagall asked, looking up from her paperwork. She'd dismissed the class when Harry fled, leaving his bag of books and his wand, so when he came back to retrieve them, she could ... interrogate him.

"I'm fine Professor," Harry said quietly, stressing the 'fine' in the sentence.

'No, I'm not,' Harry thought, 'Can't you see, I'm drowning in a sea of darkness. People are affected by everything I do. I need to be an anonymous face in a crowd. I need people to help me, figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life. But I'm Harry Potter, I don't get help. I've fulfilled my destiny now, and I don't know what to do. Everyone would be sooo much better if I disappeared of the face of the earth.'

"No you're not," Professor McGonagall said critically, "Sit."

Harry screwed up his nose. He really didn't want to. He needed to get to the library, really soon. Quick dinner, then the whole night in the library, to prove his theory wrong. He wasn't pregnant. Just ... a little suicidal, depressed and paranoid.

"Mr Potter!" Professor McGonagall said loudly.

"Sorry ... yeah ..." Harry muttered and slid into his chair.

"What's wrong?"


"Are you worried about after school finishes?"

"No." 'Yes. I'm going home to my over-protective ex-convict godfather and his werewolf best friend/ lover, whatever. I have no prospects. I can't become an Auror. I've seen too much death for that."

"What's happened between you Mr Weasley and Miss Granger?"

"We ... just ... grew apart."

"Grew apart?"

"Yes." Harry said simply.

"Right. If there is ANYTHING on your mind Potter, don't hesitate to ask."

"Thank you Professor."

"You may go."

Harry slid out of his chair, grabbed his wand and book bag, and fled the classroom.


Harry flung himself into the desk nearest to him in the library, earning him a reproving glare from Madam Pince. He sent her an apologetic glance and walked to the medical section of the library.

Harry glanced along the shelf of books ... 'Magical Maladies', 'Common Wizarding Diseases', Magical Afflictions and Cures', 'Antidotes and their Cures', Aches, Breaks and Bites', 'Ye Olde Magike Diseases'. Harry pulled down a few promising titles from the shelf and sat down.

Twenty minutes and three books later, all Harry had found was the following passage.

"Male Pregnancy,

Not much is known about the wizarding phenomenon, as there hasn't been a case since 1689. The child born from this case was killed a week after its birth. As it was born to a couple who dabbled in the Dark Arts, and as children born to male couples are well known as powerful, Light extremists killed the baby. Notable wizarding figures that were born of Male Pregnancy include Godric Gryffindor and Merlin."

Harry knew all of that. Nearly. There was nothing else in the library on the subject at all. Nothing.

'I'll have one last look,' Harry thought, and stood up and looked one last time through the book shelves.

Sighing, he looked along the shelves and did a double take. A small, thin book at the very end of the top shelf. Pulling it out Harry glanced it over. It was very thin, probably no more than 20 pages, and very small. The cover was dark blue leather. Harry thumbed to the first page, and in elegant black calligraphy was the term, 'Male Pregnancy' by F. C. Richards. Harry's heart leaped and he practically ran back to his seat. He grabbed a bigger book to put around it - Madam Pince was giving him funny looks as it was.

He turned to the first page and began to read.

"Male Pregnancy - it read - is a very rare occurrence, even in the wizarding world. It is so uncommon there hasn't been a reported case for 300 years.

Younger wizards are informed of the possibility, although it is not widely known. Medi-witches and wizards and Healers study Male Pregnancy in their course, learning how to recognise it,"

'That's what I need,' thought Harry and he read on.

"cope with it and survive it.

Survival rates for Male Pregnancy are relatively high, as there are very few cases, and the cases that are reported are studied and treated by the very tip of the medical profession.

A single child is all that has ever been born of a Male Pregnancy, the child always being male. Each child has been of an similar average size to children born of a male/female pregnancy."

'.... I'm having a boy,' Harry thought, 'Bugger, I'm definitely having a ... baby now? God that sounds so weird. I need a charm, or a potion or something to tell me if I am pregnancy. Yep find the detection thingy, then panic.'

"Male Pregnancy occurs when one mans sperm connects with another's inside the body. If the two men are powerful enough it causes a magical reaction which causes the two cells to from an embryo. The magic of the child and father grows a bag for the child to grow in place on a womb. A magical umbilical cord is grown and the child grows the same way as it would in a woman's body."

'OK, well, why isn't he pregnant? We both ... yeah well.... Oh God, that's how it's born? That's gonna hurt. Shite...' Harry inwardly winced and flipped the page.

"There are two methods of detecting a Male Pregnancy. The first is a potion, the ingredients and method of which are on the opposite page.

The second method is a charm called the 'Detection Charm'. It can be used on both men and women. Another person casts the charm on the subject and if a white light appears then they are pregnant. The incantation is 'Pregnatio Revealious.'"

'Shit, I have to tell someone. Who? Oh crap. Oh... bugger, who?

Dumbledore? No he doesn't care now I've killed Voldemort.

Ron and Hermione.... out of the question.

Sirius and Remus? Maybe, if I am I'll have to tell them. But they'd be so disappointed in me. A single, gay father at 17? Not good. Not good at all.

Seamus? Nah, I need an adult. Maybe a teacher?

Madam Pomfrey? No, she's medical, she'd make me report it and it would be really big... no I want to avoid that.

Professor McGonagall? God no, talking about sex to the head of my house? No. Never. Not in one million years.

Where does that leave me? Sirius and Remus I suppose. . maybe it won't be so bad. They might be fine about it.

Oh crap, I need to go to detention, damn Snape... hey Snape? OK, well, don't have any more lessons with him, so I can avoid him until the Graduation Feast, you know when I completely humiliate myself. He already hates me, thinks I'm mental, this is just something else to hate me for, and taunt me about.

Crap, I can't believe I am even considering this. It's better than asking Sirius though, he'd know I'd had sex then, and I want to avoid that, Snape knowing is better than Sirius. OK, Snape, I better go... or I'll be late. Crap.'

Harry flung his books into his bag and quickly fled the library, earning him a look from Madam Pince, and fled to the dungeons to meet his fate.


Harry knocked at the door to the dungeon and waited nervously, his fingernails already been bitten to the limits over the last day, he had taken to tapping his foot when he was nervous.


Opening the door, clutching his bag, Harry entered.

"Potter," Snape sneered, "On time for once. You are to be crushing Stink Beetles. There is a pestle and mortar on the side. Fetch it and crush the bag of bugs that are on the front desk. Complete without magic, magic messes it up. Potter, what are you waiting for? Go!"

'Oh... bugger- bugger - bugger' Harry thought as he plunged into the deep end.


"Potter, is the task too hard for you to gratify?" Snape sneered, walking around to the front of the desk.

"No...no...no Sir. It's just, can I ask you something?" Harry stuttered nervously.

"It depends," Snape said, looking at Harry curiously, "I hold the right not to answer and deduct enough points to keep Gryffindor in minuses until next year."

"Yes Sir. Could you perform this spell on me?" Harry asked quickly, blushing furiously.

"And what spell would that be?" Snape said.

"This one," Harry said, the blush on his pale face deepening further, if at all possible. He fiddled around in his bag and pulled out the book. He opened it to the correct page and handed it to the man in front of him.

Snape looked up sharply, "Potter, why?"

Harry looked at the Professor as if to say, 'I-shagged-a-bloke-isn't-it- obvious?'

"I see. Potter it is highly unlikely you need this." Snape said, a sneer firmly plastered on his face.

"I know, but I need to know Professor. I need to set my mind at rest. I need to know that this isn't right, and that there's another reason I am nauseous all the time, why I'm tired even though I've been sleeping 13 hours a night. I'm moody, irritable and feel completely crap. I haven't been eating and I've still put on weight." Harry all but yelled.

"Potter," Snape said, "How far along do you think you are?"

"Erm, a month?" Harry said, suddenly very interested in his shoes.

"Potter, I will cast this, if only to get this ridiculous notion out of your pathetically small head," Snape saw Harry open his mouth and he held up his hand, "Potter, I will tell noone of this, whatever the outcome. But expect a lot of questions after, and I expect answers."

"Yes Professor," Harry said quickly.

"Stand there," Snape said, pointing at a spot in front of him. Harry dropped his bag with a clatter and hurriedly stood in the spot, "Pregnatio Revealious."

A shot of bright silver light shot out of Snapes wand and hit Harry in the stomach. Harry could feel the light searching his inside, then it stopped. A second later, a bright white light shot out of the centre of his stomach.

"Holy shit," Harry muttered. He looked up at Snape - who clearly hadn't thought that this was to be the outcome - and saw shock. Realisation hit him as he looked into Snape's black eyes and his eyes rolled back into his head, darkness surrounded him and he met the ground, his last conscious thought being, 'Oh God, I'm pregnant.'

Please Review!! No flames!!

Btw, I know I should be working on my other fics, and I will update, I just needed to get this idea out of my head. Updates coming soon!!