Disclaimer: The only compensation I am making from this fic is the warm and fuzzy feeling in my heart whenever I open my email and see that someone took the time off to review it. Obviously, none of the characters are mine. It's Marvel's. And Warner Brothers'. I think.
A/N: This is my first fic in a long while that uses the first person, so please excuse the pronouns. =)The Proposal
I had known him for five years. By knowing, I meant really knowing. But I always felt that he had understood me long before that.
I always think of him as my soul's mate. He would look at me weird and grunt if he learned that. But it's one way of describing my relationship with him. And I love him. With all my heart.
I guess it's because we're so much alike. We're both loners. We both work hard not to let others too close, for fear that we might hurt them or something. But deep inside, we care. Though we'd both deny it.
Well, anyway, he was the first person to welcome me to the X-Men. And for that, I'm forever grateful. Funny, the first time he saw me, the time I thought he was out to kill me, he already understood that I'm not yet ready for them, for the X-Men. Well, that was huge for me, considering that we barely spoken two words to each other and I'm not really the sort of person one can read quite clearly. And yet, that day in the cold, after learning of my mother's treachery and with Scott's memories at the back of my head, one look at me and he knew. He knew I was ready. And so, he welcomed me. And for the first time in a long while, I actually felt as if I found home.
He knew me.
And I know him.
That's why I have no reason to be nervous. I could read him like the back of my hand. I could anticipate his reactions.
And given our relationship, this was the next logical step to take. Right? He has absolutely no reason to be surprised. The whole Institute knows that someday it would come to this. And surely, even he could see the practicality of my plans.
Yeah right. Tell that to my racing heart.
I took a deep, calming breath before pushing the kitchen doors open.
There he was, Logan. Larger than life, don't give a damn, kick ass, animalistic Logan.
I gulped when I saw him there, on the kitchen table, reading the morning paper like he did everyday. Alright. Be calm. It's just Logan. My soul mate, remember? No reason be nervous. It's not like I don't see him or talk to him every morning.
To calm myself even more, I wiped my clammy hands on my jeans. And then I felt it. A slight lump in my right jean pocket. The ring. I think that gave me enough confident boost to follow through my plans. We're going to talk and we're going to talk now. It was as simple and as complicated as that. A smile touched my lips as my determination was renewed. I was going to ask him now even if it killed us both. I want to be able to wear that ring in public when I walk out the kitchen.
"Well?" Came a gruff voice. "Are you going to stand there all day?"
I gave him a glare as I walked in as I sat directly in front of him. That idiot didn't even look at me! Well, I think I have to say something to get his attention.
"We need to talk."
That did the trick.
Like every male before him who heard those four words communicated to him, Logan panicked. It doesn't matter that he used to be a super soldier. It doesn't matter that he had been around for ages. It doesn't matter that he had seen and heard things that were more shocking. He was still a man.
Coffee and newspaper were slammed on the table. Knuckles turned while from gripping the table tightly. Eyes desperately searched for a way out. "Now?"
"No time like the present, sugah."
"Listen, kid," he began. I know he was frantically racking his brain for a way out of this conversation.
"Logan, I ain't a kid anymore!" I protested with great frustration as I suddenly stood up and start pacing the room. "Look at me! I'm all grown up. I ain't the scared teen y'all took home years ago!" I knew I was close to hysterical but I didn't care. All I knew is that he had to understand that I'm a woman now. I know what I want, and I'm not letting anyone stand between me and it. Not even him.
"Darlin'," he began.
"No, let me talk first." I took a deep calming breath as I stopped and stood in front of him.
He shrugged, urging me to continue.
"I love you, Logan." I told him as I crouched down so that the two of us were face to face.
He started at that. His eyes widened. In all the years the two of us had known each other, in all the years our relationship had blossomed, I had never spoken those words to him. It was the first time he heard it from me. And he knew it was a big thing for me. I'm not one to say how I feel, not even after all those years I stayed at the Institute. Slowly, the fight was gone from his face. He gave me grin, a small one at that, but a grin nonetheless.
"I know that, darling." He told me. I knew he wouldn't say that he loves me back. I knew he does love me, but he would never verbalize such words. But I don't need him to. Because I know. He already loved me those years ago, way back when I was still a sullen teen who is mad at the whole world. He loved me even when my powers were still uncontrollable, untamed. He loved me even when I almost destroyed the world when I unwittingly released Apocalypse. Loved me, and trusted me enough, when he turned to me and depended on me to save the world. He loved me then, and he loves me even more now.
I smiled back at him. "And I'm old enough now."
The grim look returned to his face, his mouth was set in a thin, hard smile. I know he didn't like where this conversation was going, but dammit, it had to happen here and now! I was determined to finish what I started.
But I decided to give him a break. After all, I wasn't cruel. Oh, I was tempted to lay it on thick just to watch him sweat it, as revenge for all those Danger Room sessions he made us take. But, this is Logan we're talking about.
"Sugah," I drawled. "Don't be like that. Look at me. I'm grown up enough that I don't look like your teenaged daughter anymore." I grinned at him, at my lame attempt at humor. "You can't bully me around anymore."
He growled half-heartedly at me, but intimidation was the furthest emotion I felt at that moment. I merely laughed.
He let out a deep breath, pretty much in the same way I did earlier. And I know that he was crumbling. He never could deny me anything once I got him into this state.
"This is what I want," I told him softly, urging him to understand.
"I don't want you to have any regrets,"
"I only want you to be happy."
"Are you sure about this?"
I smiled at him and nodded my head. "Yes."
He paused for a moment then looked at me, studying me for a moment, seeing the woman that I had become. He nodded, finally satisfied. He gave me a look.
He knows that I'm happy. He knows that I want this.
And deep within his heart, he knew that he wanted this too. He's just too stubborn to admit it to himself, never mind out loud.
This is it. It's now or never.
"Alright. Ask away, darlin'."
I took a deep breath. "Logan," I began, my voice cracking a bit. Suddenly, my eyes filled with tears as what I was doing finally hit me. There is no turning back now. "I want to ask you," I sniffled as I paused, my courage faltering a little.
He closed his eyes for a moment, and when he opened them, I saw that he, too, was holding back his tears.
"Would you walk me down the aisle?" I asked him softly. "Would you give me away at the altar?"
He choked a bit. Never a man of words, he was unable to reply. Instead, he half-stood and wrapped me into his arms.
Suddenly, tears were streaming down my cheeks as I hugged him back and held on to him tight.
His hold onto me tightened. "It would be my honor, Rogue."
"Thank ya," I gasped as I burrowed deeper into his chest.
I felt him gently push me away. "Damn, darlin', you always had the worst taste in men,"
I laughed, which was kinda hard since my nose was running by then.
"Always remember that if ever that Cajun hurt you," sninkt.
I gave him a warm grin as I nodded. "I know."
He wiped the tears from my cheeks as gently as he could. "Congratulations, Stripes."
"Thank ya." I rushed back into his arms. "Thank ya."
P.S. Please don't hurt me whimpers fitfully If you checked my profile or read my previous works, you know I'm a staunch Romy supporter. Sorry to all ye Rogan fans out there.