If Only
Author: Gothic Spook
E-mail: gothic_spook@hotmail.com
Rating: PG-13 just to be safe
Category: I think Romance and a little angst
Summery: I was listening to this song and I thought that it describes a lot about Monica's feelings, so I thought hey why not turn it into a little fic!
Disclaimer: Don't belong to me. Property of CC, 1013 and FOX. Yada yada yada.
Spoilers: None
Archive: Fanfiction.com. Anywhere that wants it, juts let me know
Feedback: Love it
Authors Notes: First song fic! The song is by Amy Studt and is called If Only' Its one of my all time favourite songs!

On the weekends I don't have much of a social life. I spend it all by myself. Except friday nights where John and I go to a bar and have a couple of drink and talk. Every time I always think Maybe this time he'll take that step and kiss me or tell me that he cares' But he doesn't. So every Friday night I end up crying my eyes out. I need to know that he cares for me. I need to know if its worth waiting for him. I need someone to care for me and I need someone to need me.

I need someone who will understand, someone who'll help me when I need it. Every Friday night I reflect on my life. What have I got to show for it? A good job. Great friends. But no family and no love. John needs to understand that I cant waste my life waiting for him. I cant stand still and see the world passing right before my eyes. How long will I have to be waiting for him? Forever? I need to get over him. I need to find someone who does need me and who isn't afraid of showing it.

I'm tired of being the way I am. Maybe if something was different about me then maybe I would be able to move on. Maybe find someone else. Someone else to love. To be with. BUt no matter how hard I try, no love is greater than the love I feel for John. The love that I hope he feels for me. I know I cant change. And I don't want to. I know that I may be waiting a long time for him. But I also know that I would wait eternity for him.