Please please please let me get what I want this time

**** After watching the movie for the zillionth time I decided to put my thoughts on paper of how I would feel if it was ME out there waiting for Sam to come and kiss me. Please R&R since this is the first story I've written since high school all thoese years ago!!! Usual disclaimers apply - not mine etc etc!************

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"Now go out there and get em"

With those words, and a slap on the bum from Coach Romano I head out to the center of the pitch. Walking out, looking at all these people watching me was both terrifying and amazing. All these people were here to see me? Me, mouse like little Josie Geller who had written an article that came straight from the heart. Maybe that was why they were all there supporting me - not just because it was so romantic what I was doing - like Aldyse said - but because so many people had awful high school experiences and weren't so lucky to get a second chance to make it all right - a second chance to find thier soulmate...

As I reach the mound and pick up the microphone I'm struck dumb by all the support. Thank you doesn't really come close to how grateful I feel. With a start I remember why I am here and ask for my 5 minutes on the clock. As the clock ticks to 4:59 - less than 5 already!!! - I feel myself go cold. Standing on that mound gazing around me and shivering in the warm breeze I feel like a block of ice and can't stop the thought that keeps running through my head - he's not going to come, he doesn't forgive me, Sam.....

The clock keeps ticking. If only I could've told him how I felt at prom!!!! This all could've been different.. I shook my head.. no regrets Josie!! If it's meant to be then he will come...oh I hope he comes!

Please please please let me get what I want this time...that song keeps running through my head! I always thought that every moment had a corresponding song - now with 1.10 left I know it's true..

Oh god there's only 20 seconds left... Sam...please Sam forgive me....I'm so sorry.. I felt sick with nerves with guilt... with despair

The crowd is starting to count down from 8 seconds. Please don't count. I just want time to stand still, if we don't get to zero then he can't not come. Oh god I'm not even thinking grammatically correctly! Sam....

2.... keep looking, keep hoping... please, please Sam....

1... Sam....

Zero...he didn't come. All the hope and joy goes out of my body and I just feel....empty. My whole body goes limp and I vaguely hear the microphone drop to the ground with a dull thud. Of course he didn't come. My life isn't some freaking romance novel! Why would he forgive me. Don't ohhhh me! I don't want your pity! Though at least out here no one can hear the sound of my heart breaking ...

O.K gotta put on a brave face for the crowd. I smile shrug do the whole "Oh well whatta you gonna do" thing before closing my eyes to block it all out...oh Sam why? Why could you not forgive me. Stifling a sob I prepare to do the long walk back off the pitch....my walk of shame

The sound of cheering breaks through the dark fog of despair. Why are they cheering? My world has just ended what is there to cheer about! And then through my tears I see him this figure running down the stairs, getting closer and closer - running to me. Please dont' let it be some joker coming out to humiliate me again...Hang on it can't be can it, oh god it's him...Sam! He's getting closer and closer, oh god what's he going to do? I'm still crying and laughing and oh god he's slowing down and he's walking over and ...oh lord I'm skaking like a leaf....he's almost here is he going to speak or...ohhhhh....he's kissing me. Sam is kissing me....Sam forgives me! everything is going hazy and I can hardley stand my knees are so weak.

He's pulls away, I'm still laughing and crying, I can't believe this is real. He's pushing my hair back from my face he's looking at me with such tenderness that I can hardly look him in the eye. "Sorry I'm late..it took me for every to get here" he says with a rueful grin. I look at him and the love and adoration coming from his eyes leaves me speechless "I know what you mean" and I do. After this long journey of self discovery I know what it's like to be late. And I know that everything going to be ok now. With this amazing man looking at me like I am the only person in the universe - how could it not be alright? Then he's kissing me again and it's amazing and it's just....ohhhhh...

I've I've I've got what I want this time.....