The One and OnlyBy BadMomma64
Warnings: Yaoi. Slightly needy Heero.
Spoilers: Not unless you know nothing about the series; in which case, some.
Duo POV, notes at the end.
Disclaimer: Belong to me, they do not.
I run my hands through my hair and lean back in my seat, letting out a low whistle. He leans back in his chair, shoulders slumped, hands still poised at the edge of the keyboard.
"Wow." It's all I can think to say.
He nods dumbly.
We sit, staring at his desktop for what seems like an eternity; just letting it sink in.
"Wow!" I know I'm repeating myself, but I just can't think of anything else to say to that.
He takes in a slow, deep breath still staring straight ahead and lets it back out quickly. His hands drop to his lap and he tilts his head back slightly, eyes closing. Another gusty breath escapes him.
I lean forward a bit, resting a hand at the base of his skull. My fingers thread into the hair there and massage gently at his scalp. It is one of my ways for gauging his tension.
As far as I'm concerned, all the tension in his body springs into being from this one spot. I don't know how many times, in the years we've been together, that I've felt the first inklings of tension at this very point. And since I'm probably the only person that ever regularly puts their hand there, I think it's a pretty safe bet I'm right.
Finally, he nods his assent. "Fine."
"Sure?" His breathing looks normal but it's regulated. A bit too regulated.
He nods slightly again and sits up straight, shutting the computer down. "I'm gonna shower before bed. I'll be right out." He leaves the small office/spare bedroom without looking back.
What I want to do is follow him. Hold him. Console him. But that's not what he wants. Right now what he wants is to be alone, so he can come to terms with it in his own way. Alone. Yet not.
No longer alone. No longer the only one.
In a way it's funny how a seemingly random event can change your perspective on your place in this world. What we originally thought had been a freak occurrence – something so unlikely it would never happen again – turned out to be something that was so incredibly unusual in its never having actually occurred before. The sound of the shower spurs me into motion.
My body knows what it needs to do. Return to our bedroom. Shed street clothes. Put on sleepwear. Get in bed. Wait for him. My brain, however, is still on hiatus.
The data is staggering.
Between AC175 and AC181, over one third of all the recorded male births on L1 alone reflect the same two names. When searching only by the same surname, regardless of spelling variations, the number jumps to three quarters. When the search is changed to look for only one of the names, the figure skyrockets to four-fifths.
Of all the recorded male births on L1, between AC175 and AC181, approximately eighty percent include either Heero, Hiro, Hiiro, Yuy or Yui. Almost forty percent had both names.
He is – by far – not the only Heero Yuy out there.
I understand why he might have a hard time with that concept; it came as quite a shock to both of us the day we were first introduced to it. Our small group of friends had actually spent some amount of time discussing the subject. We had convinced ourselves that we were quite unique in this universe.
It all started with a comment Trowa made to us one night while gathered for some occasion at Wufei's apartment. Seemingly out of the blue, Lady Une had contacted Trowa to find out if he intended to keep using his name. Since she was acting as Mariemeia's guardian, someone claiming to be the Barton Family Historian had called her to inquire about the young man that had taken to using the real Trowa's name. 'Trowa' being a traditional family name, they wanted to avoid having more than one Trowa Barton wandering the Earth and the colonies if at all possible. I thought it was a crock of shit until Wufei explained that his clan, too, had had a Family Historian.
Apparently it's not all that uncommon for large, powerful families with long lineages to have people who track the names of family members to ensure that there aren't five people running around with the same name in the same generation. In the Book of Chang, as I came to call it over the course of the explanation, there is a paper record – or at least was, since the only thing left is a computer database – detailing Wufei's name and it's origin. He was named after two of his ancestors; Wu Ming Pah a poet and philosopher and Fei Han a clan magistrate. According to clan tradition, there would be no other Wu Fei recorded in the Book of Chang for at least two generations.
Quatre's case is only slightly different to Wufei's. He's not sure if they actually have a record of these things or a family historian, but he does know that it's customary for families to only use the names of deceased family members and, out of deference, only allow one child per generation to be named such. It is also a sign not only of affection but of honor as well, since most parents only name their children after someone they cared deeply about. He was to be named after one of his father's late uncles, Al Kahtura; but it seems the old guy was very popular with Q's parents' generation. While his mom was still pregnant they learned that someone else in the family had named a son after the uncle. Not ones to be dissuaded from their decision to honor the guy, they altered the name to suit their purses, hence Quatre; which when said with a slightly Arabic accent does sound an awful lot like the old man's name. So, like Wufei and Trowa, he was obviously the only one around.
Me, I'd made up my name, or rather picked it up as I went along. Duo for Solo and Maxwell for the priest. What were the chances that nice Scottish families would be naming their offspring for numerical equivalents. Not much chance, in our opinions; so 'nuff said there.
And Heero, well his was a case similar to Trowa's, a borrowed named that he'd only been using since just before launching on his first mission. When asked what he'd been called before then, he had shrugged and admitted that he'd never really had a name. His earliest memories were of using code names while traveling with the assassin, always playing the part of the guy's son. After he'd hooked up with Dr. J., he'd been referred to as 'child' or 'boy' until being assigned his official 'mission' name.
Not that we really got into a great discussion on the whole name thing with Heero, because after all, there's an undeniable uniqueness inherent to Heero being… well, Heero. I mean, the guy's proven time and again that he is nearly indestructible; he's survived the most unbelievable things in his short life. Think about it, Heero detonated his first gundam practically standing in the cockpit and despite trashing his suit all that happened to him was that he dropped into a coma for a few weeks. Then, during the Barton uprising, he completely fried his suit while piloting it - pieces falling off all over the place, crashed it to the ground and still managed to walk out of there alive! Unique didn't begin to describe the guy. So it's only natural what happened while we were on L3 for a long-overdue vacation came as a rather rude awakening.
The StarLines Resorts had recently opened a new hotel touting the best and biggest, personal Zero-G Rec Rooms and we had planned ten days to enjoy them at our discretion. It was a fad that had been growing in popularity for years and the StarLines had been the leaders in Zero-G Rec from the start.
By the third day of our stay on L3 we had already done a little site seeing and taken advantage of many of the resort's other amenities. We'd been to the indoor pool, the spa, the game room, the club, the restaurants and had even tried our hand at indoor skiing. We'd been putting off our first trip to the rec rooms for fear that we might like them so much we'd never get around to doing anything else. We, rather maturely, waited until the morning of our forth day before booking one of the rooms.
The experience was exhilarating.
The Rec Rooms are state of the art. All the G-Force controls are voice activated. Game court controls are all sub-surface and also voice activated; you voice a command and the room repaints itself to the requested playing field. Panels near the corners of the room provide access to recessed equipment-storage compartments which, when closed or deactivated, completely disappear from view. While game is in play, the hand holds that run all along the edges of the room disappear into the beveled corners. It was awesome.
With less than fifteen minutes of our allotted time left, we were already winding down. In all honesty, by that time we were just horsing around; bouncing off the walls and playing an idiotic game of catch that involved more groping of each others body parts than any actual evasion and capture. I had pretty much decided on suggesting we try to book morning slots for the balance of our vacation when the speaker system came to life.
Mr. Heero Yuy, please call Guest Services from the nearest courtesy phone. Mr. Heero Yuy, please call Guest Services from the nearest courtesy phone.
The speaker went on to repeat the message in a few other languages while we both just floated in shocked silence. Heero's name was not on the room registry, mine was, so there was no reason for him to be paged. Sure, our friends knew that we'd be here but they had no reason to be calling us. And if they did feel the need to call us, why wouldn't they have called our cell phones or left a message on our in-room voice mail? We both found it odd and decided to check it out right away. I was very uncomfortable with the idea that someone felt the need to speak to us so badly that they'd have us paged. I just couldn't think of a reason for it.
Once we'd reached full gravity, Heero made a beeline for the nearest courtesy phone while I retrieved our few belongings from the lock box panel just inside the door. He was just hanging up the phone with a puzzled look on his face when I arrived. I touched his back to get his attention and he turned to look at me fully.
"They said I have a package at the Front Desk. They wanted to know if I would come pick it up or if they should deliver it to our room. The return address is from a shop here on L3."
That was very odd. We'd been out and about on L3 already but we hadn't ordered anything locally. Deciding there was only one way to discover what was behind this little mystery, we made our way to the Front Desk. When we got there, the attendant asked Heero for some ID and our room key, then ran off to get the package. There was another attendant working the desk who made eye contact with us and smiled, but didn't say anything until another patron approached."Hello, may I help you?" "Hello, yes. My name is Heero Yuy, I understand you have something for me. May I trouble you for the package that was delivered for me?"
Oh yeah, that was a shocker. Heero and I, having had nothing better to do than stand there and wait, had not missed the conversation. We looked at each other and then over at the guy who'd just spoken. Seemed the desk attendant guy hadn't missed the fact that there were now two Heero Yuys claiming the same package either. He shot us a quick look then asked the guy for ID and a room key, disappearing into the same room as our attendant.
The guy, the other Heero, noticed us looking at him and smiled politely. I returned the smile and looked away, feeling kind of bad that we were both staring at him. Heero, my Heero, however did no such thing. He just kept staring as if he could bore a hole through the guy's forehead to read his mind. It was actually kind of unnerving, so I stepped into his line of sight and tried to get him to focus on me. If I'm not mistaken he was actually starting to lean over to see around me when I grabbed his arm and had to physically turn him away from the other guy.
"Get a grip, babe, you're staring." I hissed quietly. "This is probably just the mother of all highly unlikely situations. Think about it, what are the chances, huh? That in all the colonies and all of Earth there are two of you and you're both here, at the same time. Freaky!"
I'd wiggled my eyebrows and given my Heero the best grin I could, but it was not having the desired effect. I was just about to try to shake him free of his focused stupor when our friendly little desk attendant returned and motioned that she needed to speak to us.
"It seems there's been a little mix up. I am sorry to have taken up so much of your time Mr. Yuy, but we had to make confirmation with the sender. The package was intended for the other gentleman there. She pointed discreetly at the other man. Your names are pronounced the same, but they are spelled differently. As an apology for inconveniencing you, we'd like to offer you complimentary use of one of our services. Just present this card with your key card the next time you visit one of the resort's facilities."
Since my Heero still seemed to be a little preoccupied by the news of the other Heero – or would that be Hiro or Hiiro? – I took the offered card, thanked the desk lady and pulled my stunned lover along behind me as I made my way to the elevators in the South Wing.
When we got to the room, I let him go in first, then closed and locked the door behind us. I toed off my shoes and put our cash cards, room keys, IDs and Complimentary Services card down on the table by the door. When I turned it was to find Heero stretched out on his back in the middle of the bed with one arm thrown over his eyes, the other thrown out to the side.
This was a bad sign.
My Heero Yuy does not plop on top of beds like that – that's more my style than his. No matter how tired or crappy he's feeling, he always takes his shoes off and puts them away then gets at least partially undressed before laying down.
Our original plan had been to come up to the room to shower and change before heading out for some lunch and maybe a movie. I decided in that instant that the plan needed to be chucked. I crawled up on the bed and stretched out next to him. When he didn't react I scooted over, under the outstretched arm and draped myself halfway across him. That got me at least a reaction. His free arm came up around my back and the hand that lay up by his head came to tangle itself in my hair.
"You in shock?"
I could feel him shake his head slightly. "Stunned. I think." Then after another moment of silence he began to pull away. "We should probably"
"Stay right the hell here and chill. No need to go anywhere."
I tightened my grip on him and was rewarded by the same. He tuned toward me, draping a leg over my hips and cradled my head to his chest. After a moment he dug his face into the top of my head and breathed deeply.
"Wouldn't do that if I were you. I stink."
I know it was lame, but I was trying to lighten the mood. He would have none of it.
"I always thought… It never…"
"Never occurred to you that someone else might have been named Heero Yuy?"
"It was just a code name, it's not even… mine. It's not MY name."
"Damn it Heero, it is so yours! It's as much yours as mine is mine."
There was silence again while he thought about that. Of the five of us, only Quatre and Wufei know what their real names are; Heero, Trowa and I use made up or borrowed ones. It makes you question things sometimes.
Lost in our own thoughts we did not do much of anything for a while. Every once in a while he'd tighten his hold on me or clutch at my hair, but other than that we just lay there together.
"What's bothering you Heero?"
"I don't know. I feel like… like he's taken something away from me. Or maybe I've taken something from him? Like I've… stolen his name, his identity."
"Heero, his parents took his name from a famous dead guy. Or maybe even a famous not-yet-dead guy. The guy looked a little older than us, maybe the original Heero Yuy was still alive when he was born. For all we know, he might even be related to the original one."
"It just feels weird."
"I know, babe, of course it does. But it doesn't change who you are, and it certainly doesn't change who I love. I love Heero Yuy. H-E-E-R-O-Y-U-Y. Not Hiiro with an 'I' or two. I love this Heero Yuy." I grabbed at him indiscriminately; touching, caressing what I could reach in our position. "Blue eyes, messy hair, big feet, skinny legs, gentle hands, … a great ass!" I gave said body part a squeeze just for good measure.
He clutched at my hair for a moment then pulled my head back so he could look at me. The shock seemed to be fading as a hint of a smile made an appearance. His eyes searched mine, softening minutely and he opened his mouth to speak.
"I do not have skinny legs."
He'd said it with such seriousness that I couldn't help but laugh. That was so 'not' what I'd expected from him right then.
"Yes you do! They've got nice muscle tone and all, but they're still skinny. As a matter of fact, if you compare-"
My words were cut short when his lips descended over mine. The kiss started, not so much passionate as it was desperate, but as it continued it morphed. When the kiss ended as abruptly as it had started there was no hint of shock left on his face, only quiet acceptance and gratitude.
We stayed there for a few hours longer and it wasn't until our stomachs loudly protested the absence of food that we moved from our comfortable position. We ordered room service and alternated use of the shower. We stayed in the rest of the day; watched TV, ate, snuggled, dozed. We never left each other's side.
That night, we made love like there was no tomorrow. And when we were done, exhausted and barely capable of lifting a finger, we drifted off to sleep secure in the knowledge of who we were and what we were to each other.
We didn't encounter the other Hiiro again until our second to last day at the resort. We had just returned to the hotel from an afternoon out when our paths crossed in the lobby. I felt, more than saw, Heero tense beside me before stopping all together. The other Hiiro bowed slightly and stepped up to us, speaking in a softly accented voice.
"I am sorry for the confusion of the other day. It does not happen often, so I forget that I am not the only one named after our great statesman. Please forgive any inconvenience I may have caused you."
He bowed again respectfully and moved away.
My Heero said nothing, only watched him walk away for a moment before stiffly resuming our path to the elevators. He said nothing on the way up to our suite, nothing once we were again inside. Figuring he needed a moment to himself, I made a beeline for the bathroom. When I emerged it was to find him absorbed by something on the Guest Services terminal.
Coming up quietly behind him I saw what had him so engaged. He'd called up the local directory and was paging through the phone listings. I watched in fascination as he found what he was looking for. There were thirteen entries for Yui with some variation of Heero as the first name. Another five entries listed the last name Yuy, same first name.
He pushed back slightly from the terminal but continued to stare hard at it. I dropped my hands to his shoulders and squeezed.
"It changes nothing, love."
"I know. He nodded after a minute and seemed to be gathering himself up. I know. It's just… weird."
He shut off the terminal and took a turn in the bathroom. He was very hesitant, somewhat withdrawn, for the rest of day. After bedding down for the night we held each other close and quietly spoke of our love for each other. I repeated what I'd told him a few nights before and while it seemed to calm him, it was still a long time before he feel asleep.
We spoke no more of it for the remainder of our time there. Neither of us mentioned it on the flight home. We didn't discuss it over the course of the next week. As a matter of fact, it didn't come up again until we were eating breakfast a few days ago when, right before leaving for work, he quietly mentioned that he'd made inquiries on L4 and found similar results to what he'd found on L3.
I found it a bit disconcerting to see how he was reacting to the news. Heero is easily one of the strongest, most level headed people I know. To see him shaken by something that was so out of his control was unnerving. That night was a repeat of the first. His passion had an edge of desperation to it. It was as if he was afraid that the existence of these other people who shared his name would change him, would change us. After we'd spent ourselves time and again, I reassured him in the only way I could. I repeated the words I'd said that first night; reminding him that he was the only Heero Yuy I cared about, the only one I loved. The only one that mattered to me. That night, I was the one who couldn't drop off to sleep easily.
The next morning, I approached him with a suggestion. It had occurred to me overnight that if he continued to seek out the information as he was doing, in little bits and pieces, it would take him through the same cycle of doubt again and again. I knew him, I knew he would not let this go. He would continue to search and in doing so he would continue torture himself with unfounded doubts. My plan was simple. Make one, sweeping, all encompassing search, and lay the issue to rest once and for all. I suggested that he make requests to search all the colony databases and compile the results. Then, when it was all gathered, he could look over the result and know exactly how many there were. Hopefully that would put an end to his strange curiosity.
He informed me that he'd received the data from the last colony database as soon as I arrived home from work today. After some discussion, we agreed to go about our usual routine; leaving the information until we'd had our dinner and cleaned up. Hesitantly he admitted that he wanted me there when he looked at the results and I agreed. I would not deny him the support.
The click of the bathroom door closing alerts me to his presence in the room. He's already in a pair of sleep shorts, the jeans he'd had on slung over his shoulder. He crosses the room to the dresser to place his watch and wallet there for the night. I watch silently as he finishes his routine, dropping the jeans neatly on the chest at the foot of our bed before looking my way.
I say nothing, pulling the sheet back slightly and inviting him to join me. He crawls up from the foot of the bed and wriggles his way into a comfortable position. We are in a position similar to that first night on L3, only this time he is in the circle of my arms. I lie quietly for a little longer. Waiting. Holding. Comforting.
"Tell me." He whispers. There is a bit of uncertainty in his voice and his arms tighten around me.
"You are the one, and the only, Heero Yuy that matters to me. The only one in this universe that I love above all else. There is no other like you. There is no other for me."
His breath gusts gently against my skin but he says nothing, so I continue.
"You are my Heero, no one else's. Blue eyes, messy hair, big feet, skinny legs, gentle hands."
I feel his lips curl into the smallest of smiles before he places a kiss at my collar bone. "Thank you" he breathes and his arms adjust around me again.
I run a hand through his hair, kissing the top of his head. "You are most welcome."
I can feel his smile broaden against my skin. He burrows a little closer and his hands begin to caress up and down my back. I am startled when one lands unexpectedly on my butt and squeezes. "What happened to the 'great ass'?"
"Oh!" A bark of laughter escapes me and I wiggle down a bit so that we are face to face. One hand grips the back of his head so I can kiss him, the other drops to grip said body part. "Absolutely nothing." We grin at each other in the dark. "Just didn't think you needed me to tell you how…"
He kisses me soundly, prolonging the moment for what feels like an eternity. "I don't, really, I just like hearing that it's something you like." He pulls back slightly and his eyes travel my face as if looking for something. He smiles and pulls me closer again. His cheek against mine, he whispers in my ear. "I love you too. More than you know. More than I could ever say."
He clutches at me again but now there is no desperation in it, no fear, no uncertainty. Only love and happiness.
"You are my one and only, Duo. Thank you."
We kiss again and when we break apart he is smiling peacefully.
"Anytime, love, anytime."
Note: The title was inspired by a line of dialogue from Jana's You've Got Male. It got me to thinking what the possibilities would be. This is where the thinking got me. So thanks, Jana, for the unsuspecting inspiration.