When Harry plays

It was a sunny Sunday morning at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Severus Snape gritted his teeth and measured the thick liquid, before adding it into the warm water. He stirred the mixture twice, smiling slightly to the nice smell and the bubbles that appeared. He tested the temperature of the liquid and feeling satisfied he looked down. To his amazement the last, and most important, ingredient required was missing. He looked around, his gaze searching for it, hoping to find it before the warm water would get cold.

"Now, if I was a naked baby boy, where would I hide?" he thought half- seriously, half-playfully.

Potter had proved to be worthy of his "amazing abilities" and started crawling. Snape, though he would never admit it openly, was surprised by how quickly the infant had mastered the new art of crawling. At first he was a bit wobbly, but in quite some time, Potter was able to cruise himself anywhere. Unfortunately, however, that enabled Snape to understand even better; why that boy was sorted to Gryffindor. For baby Harry was determined to drive his professor nuts by searching the whole chamber. He had proven that early this morning.


Snape, who had for some reason forgot the primary rule of never-leave-a- cupboard-open-when-a-crawling-menace-is-around, was about to discover that there were quite some ways for a baby to get dirty while searching, even if a chamber is clean. The Potions Master had been grading a three-foot essay about "Frog Warts and their Multiple Uses", when a soft "Thump" was heard. A few seconds later a squeal of delight, accompanied with giggles, echoed inside the room, forcing him to raise his head from the paper. His beetle- black eyes enlarged from shock on what his sight met and a faint "Merlin's Star-patterned Robes!" escaped his lips.

Baby Harry, the Boy-Who-Was-Destined-To-Irritate, was seated opposite the small, wooden ingredients' cupboard. A bug full of blue powder had rolled and opened over the boy, who was now covered with its contents. The infant took handfuls of the powder and tossed them around, creating a messy effect.

"Potter, whatever you do, do not put your fingers in your mouth. And stop tossing that thing around. It does not grow on trees!" Snape exclaimed as he rushed towards the powder-covered baby.

He, then, knelt down at his hands and knees and started gathering the powder into a new bag. Having saved what could be saved, he turned to see Potter. He stood up and took the baby into his arms. Looking at it, he smirked.

"You know Potter, you look like a baby clown!" he said softly, still smirking at the boy.

Big Mistake! For if Snape had paid attention, instead of smirking, he would had noticed that baby Harry's eye-colour changed to deep green. And deep green meant only one thing. Mischief. Before Snape could realise it, the infant tossed a handful of blued powder onto his face.

"Hey! That was not funny!" he protested coughing, as the blue powder sprinkled on his cheeks. Having no other option, he placed the giggling boy on the mattress-like carpet and undressed it.

"Stay there!" he ordered and retreated into the bathroom.

"HEHEHEHAHAHA! You look like a sprinkled fairy!" the mirror echoed inside the bathroom.

"Call me that again, and I will not hesitate to replace you with a Muggle mirror!" Snape threatened the bathroom mirror, while he was filling a baby bath tamp with warm water.

"Replace me? With a Muggle One? Why? What does a Muggle mirror has better than me?" the mirror asked with Narcissistic tone.

"Low Levels of Self-Centrism!" Snape thought gritting his teeth.

"They don't talk!" he answered the mirror. "And the Wise Mirror is the Quiet Mirror," he finished off, leaving the bathroom.


"Now Potter where can you be?" Snape hummed slightly and stopped, instantly, in shock.

"This is preposterous!" he commented to himself. "You are, actually, playing with the boy Severus!"

He leaned down the bid mahogany desk of his, muttering under his breath about not liking the boy; and that all babies around the world should be banned. Well, not all exactly. Only the ones that had green eyes, black hair and were destined to wear glasses and save the world. The others could stay. Seeing that the boy was not under the desk, he turned and opened the wooden wardrobe. He remembered hiding from his mother, when he was a little boy, inside his chamber's wardrobe in Snape Manor. It was their pre-bath playing time. Of course his mother would always find him at the end. However Potter was not inside the wardrobe.

"Well it was pretty obvious, you ding-head!" he said to himself. "You were three! You could stand on your toes and touch the handle! He is a baby for Merlin's Sake! How do you think he was supposed to touch the handle? I don't think he can float to mid-air!"

Snape cursed softly and checked the water inside the bathtub. Still warm. Taking his wand out, he chanted a warming spell and went back to his search. Now where could that boy be? Suddenly his eyes stopped still at the four-poster bed. But of course! Potter was under the bed! How come he never thought of that?

"Typical of you Snape. You tend to disregard the most obvious answer" he thought as he knelt and looked under the bed.

"Giyarprt!" baby Harry giggled happily when his guardian appeared, looking at him from the side of the bed.

"Hello to you too boy. Now come outside and have your bath," the young black-haired man said seriously.

Baby Harry giggled happily, but did not move. Snape's eyes closed into slits and he inserted his hand under the bed. However baby Harry was quicker and rolled further inside, going outside the man's grasping area.

"That's unfair!" Snape exclaimed seeing baby Harry enjoying his unsuccessful attempts to touch him. "Who's idea was it; for me to have a large bed? Stop giggling Potter. That's infuriating!"

The infant stared at his guardian with gleaming eyes and taking a dust- bunny that was lying near him, he placed it inside his mouth.

"Eww! Potter that thing is certainly not good for you. And I can also bet that it is not nourishing," the Potion Mater commented as he closed to eyes and thought to himself.

"Maybe I can get him out by using Wingardium Leviosa. No this may hurt him and after all I can't do it under the bed. What about Accio? Does it work on living human beings? I must ask Flitwick some time. How about entering under the bed? That's plain stupid Severus. You can't fit there! Urrgh..."

"Potter," Snape ordered calmly, but in an extremely dangerous tone, "come out this instance, or I will order Creevey to take a photograph of you, naked on a bear-hide. And then I will distribute copies of that picture to every human being inside this school. Including the faculty."

The baby's eyes darkened for a couple of moments and, Snape could swear on it, came to resemble the sixteen-year old Potter's ones. That colour reminded Snape of the boy's older self thinking during Potions. The boy crawled forward, towards him. Snape sat in a kneeling position and when the boy emerged from under the bed, he caught him and raised him to his eye- level.

"Ga!" baby Harry pouted and stared the man directly into the eyes.

"Well Potter, if that's your attitude." the raven-haired man stated flatly, "Then let it be!" he continued and stared at the angry baby's eyes.

This movement turned out to be the longest staring contest Severus Snape had in his whole life. No one had ever met his glare without lowering his eyes immediately. Well except McGonagall. . . . And Dumbledore . . . And Poppy. . . And . . . Ok the faculty was much older and no one was afraid of him. But students were another issue. He looked at Harry's angry eyes and felt his eyes watering a little. That boy proved once again that he could rival his own thick-headedness. He could not afford to lose.

Snape did it. The only thing no one would ever expect him to do. The only thing that could stun, and keep, a student of him dumbfounded for days. It was so amazing! It was so unbelievable! Snape . . . stuck his tongue out to baby Harry. The baby blinked from surprise. This was a side of his guardian he did not see every day. Finally the chamber was filled with the boy's giggles. The hook-nosed professor let out a weird chuckle, due to his attempt to suppress it and remain serious.

"Ok Potter, it's time for bath!" he coughed seriously.


Baby Harry giggled happily when his body touched the warm scented water's surface. Being seated in the baby's bath tamp he started splashing water around. Snape rubbed the baby boy's creamy body with the water and then focused on his head. For some peculiar reason the man could not understand, Potter tended to move around the moment he would touch his head. After quite some time, and loads of baths, he discovered the way to keep baby Harry quiet. It was simple, yet effective. It was a plastic ducky.

"Qack, qack!" the infant exclaimed as the tall wizard gave him his bath toy. "Bloom, qack, bloom!" he continued as he splashed the plastic toy into the water. Snape smiled to this sight, only to scowl seconds later. Then taking some baby-shampoo, he rubbed it inside his wet palms and then placed it on the boy's soft hair. At first baby Harry was annoyed but seconds later, he returned back to his splashing and babbling. The tall wizard rubbed the boy's tiny head carefully and then took a bowl full of pure clean water that was near him. Placing his left palm so that he could cover the baby's eyes, he spilled the water onto the boys head, little by little, to remove the soapsuds from the shampoo.

"Go! Prrrr!" Harry exclaimed as the water ran down his head.

"Yes it is a bit cold, isn't it?" Snape commented as he rubbed the boy's head clean from the last trails of soapsuds. He, then, moved sideways and found himself staring at the infant's green eyes. Taking some "suitable- for-baby-skin" liquid soap, he started rubbing Harry's little porcelain- white body.

Baby Harry, who had probably decided at the moment that he had stayed quiet for a lot of time, grinned mischievously. When Snape's head lowered closer to him, he moved his hands forward. The black-robed professor retreated backwards and searched frantically, due to lack of vision and pain, for a towel to wipe his face.

"It stinks, it stinks. Potter when I find the towel, you are going to die!" he thought while he blindly searched around. "Well at least I have completed the whole He-Looks-Like-A-Big-Mean-Bat persona of mine." he commented to himself sarcastically. He long fingers touched something soft and he immediately brought it to his face and wiped the water off. Snape turned his attention to baby Harry, who was eyeing him gleefully tossing water around.

"Well Potter," he said smirking "you must know now. This means War."

He moved to the bathtub and splashed, gently, some water to the boy. The boy was, at first, in shock. Yet he regained his senses very quickly and attacked back. Snape felt the water splashing against his chest and was left with a mixture of different kinds of surprises. At a point, he was shocked. Potter, a weak boy that wore diapers, had the audacity to strike back. No one strikes back. For Heaven's Sake that meant "Challenge." However, what he really felt was surprise. His chest was airy and soft. To his pure amazement, the raven-haired man found himself enjoying that splattering with Potter. And he never enjoyed anything. Well, except chocolate. He stopped for a moment in order to consider his actions. The "action" he was about to engage himself with was going to become a cause for a lot of thinking.

Baby Harry stared at the tall man and threw more water on him. Snape snapped back to reality and looked at the boy with a raised eyebrow of question. Did the boy really thought that he, Severus Snape, was about to let this "Challenge" pass? He smirked and splashed more water to the boy's face. This triggered a series of count-events that was to lead to the biggest water-fight Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry ever known.


"Ok Potter, that's enough. This water is cold, and you started to get wrinkles from being in it." Snape exclaimed after quite some time. He scooped the infant into his arms and started rubbing his body with a towel.

When baby Harry was dressed, Snape took some time to examine his room. The Mattress-Like-Carpet of Doom was doused from the water and soapsuds. The assignments he was marking were lying forgotten on his mahogany desk, and a plastic duck was placed near his ingredient collection. One thing was sure. This havoc, reminded nothing of his always dignified, clean chamber.

"Severus, are you alright? You missed. . ." the older female echoed inside the room but stopped abruptly, probably from shock of what her eyes had met. ". . . lunch."

Severus Snape turned around and for a split of a second he enjoyed the surprise drawn in Minerva McGonagall's features. If someone could be proud for one thing, that would be the greatest achievement of taking Hogwarts' Deputy Headmistress by surprise. However, a couple of seconds later his face turned ashen white.

"Shit! How do explain this mess?" he thought, a bit panicked. "I don't think that the "A-Troll-Entered-My-Chambers-And-Attacked-Potter's-Bathtub" excuse will be believable. Now Severus, think something fast!"

Yet, Snape needed to explain nothing, for McGonagall's face lit up and a wide grin was spread across her features. Snape was sure that the fact that his robes were soaked with water was the hint that gave the truth away.

"WHAT?" he asked in bewildered tone as the Transfiguration's Professor gazed at him with, a Heaven Forbid, soft expression.

"Oh Severus, you two are so sweet!" McGonagall said cheerfully and turned around.

"No I am not sweet!" Snape exclaimed urgently and in desperation, while McGonagall kept smiling. "I am Severus Snape! The Potion Master of this school. I am the fear of every student around. I am certainly not sweet!"

McGonagall hummed slightly and kept smiling. She opened the door and smirking she commented:

"Ok Severus, whatever you say!" She then closed the door behind her.

"Potter," Snape said furiously, yet very calmly, while watching the infant playing with Bibi "this is entirely your fault!"