Kissing The Enemy
Author's Note: Well, here it is! Thanks to everyone who stuck with this fic even when I didn't want to write it (this one's for you)! I'm over that now, and back on the shipping wagon! So, enjoy, and drop a review if you can spare a mo! Thanks for being so patient; you rock!
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, etc, and I don't claim to. If I did, the movies'd be a whole lot different, lemme tell you....(for starters, what is up with SuperGirl!Hermione?! starts to rant to self Pink hoodie?! CURLY hair?! WTF?!)
In this chapter: SobbingSentimental!Hermione, AboutToHaveABloodyHeartAttack!Ron, Commitmentphobe?Harry, and PREGNANT?!?!Draco.
Oh, and Colin gets dropped on his head a lot, but who cares about him? ('Sides, I bet it happened all the time when he was a baby. ). Also, moody soap opera esque arguing between Harry and Draco and the effects of bad communication in a relationship (or intimacy...)..
Warning: If you are bothered by sexy throbbing veins, do not read. Also, I didn't have time to really proof this, but I really wanted to post it, so sorry for any mistakes.
Oh yeah, and I didn't hold back on the mush and fluff, either, so prepare yourself for a toothache. And 10 points to the house of whoever can point out where I was parodying the PoA movie. 15 to whoever can find the hint to Bridget Jones' Diary.
"Harry, I think we need to talk," Hermione said. Ron was glancing back and forth from Harry to Draco in shocked disbelief.
"I....I didn't want to believe....but....the evidence...here.." Ron stuttered. Draco rolled his eyes. Harry sighed.
"I think you're right, Hermione, we do need to talk. But first.." Harry trailed off and gestured towards the still paralyzed Draco.
"Ohright...." Hermione undid her handy work and Draco got up and stretched. He looked at Rond and smirked.
"So I suppose the know-it-all likes it rough, eh Weasel? Do you spend night after night, bound and gagged, with her whipping your hairy-"
"Draco! Now is NOT the time!" Harry glared at the blond Slytherin, who smirked as Ron grew red from either anger or emmbarassment (one can never tell with a Weasley).
"Um, Ron, maybe you should, um, take Colin to the hospital wing," Hermione intervened.
Everyone glanced over at poor forgotten, perverted Colin, who had passed out from all the pain inflicted upon him.
Ron walked over to hm and picked him up (Draco mentally noted that it looked as if Ron were about to carry the prevert photographer over the threshold, but wisely chose to keep that observation to himself).
"Wait, Weasal, before you go, there's something Harry and I need to tell you," Draco said seriously.
Harry looked at him in confusion. "Wha-?"
"I'm pregnant with Harry's baby" Draco burst out. "That's right; this Slytherin is now 'with child'!"
Ron was so shocked he dropped poor, poor Colin right on his perverted little head. Hermione's eyes widened.
Draco burst into laughter, his silver eyes gleaming with tears of mirth.
"Draco, will you stop before you give on a bloody heart attack?!" Harry scolded, trying to hide the smile that was tugging at his lips to no avail as he watched Malfoy roll on the floor in uncontrolled glee.
"I....haha....was just trying to....hehehehe...lightnen the mood! Hahahaha, Merlin, that look was priceless!" Draco managed between snorts of laughter. Harry noticed how Draco sometimes snorted when he really got going laughing. He smiled fondly at him.
"You ok, Ron?" Harry looked to the shocked red head, who was gingerly picking Coling back up (who probably was on the verge of death from all the abuse).
Ron stuttered (a trait he seemed to be developing when he was surprised). "Fine..fine....just fine...."
He glanced at Hermione, who look highly amused. He mock-glared at her.
"And just what do you find so funny, eh 'Mione?"
Hermione cracked a smile.
"Honestly, Ronald," she said, using her mock-snobbery voice she knew annoyed Ron to no end, "that's not even possible!"
Ron reddened again. "Well, he fooled you to!"
"Did not," Hermione said childishly.
"Did too," Ron countered, heading towards the door.
"Didn't," Hermione mumbled as Ron walked out of the door with Colin in tow.
"Um, yeah, if you're done being 7-year-olds now..." Harry started. Hermione reddened, a trait she had recently picked up from her boyfriend.
"Oh yes. Harry, isn't there something you want to tell us?" Hermione chided. Harry was silent. "What;s going on?" Hermione said softly, although she already had a good idea.
Harry started nervously. "Draco and I....are....intimate," Harry finished lamely.
Hermione looked at him quizzically. "Intimate?"
"Yeah, intimate? Is that what we're doing here, Harry?" Draco asked, voice rising slightly.
"What? Well, how would you put it, then?" Harry retorted.
"Oh, this hurts Potter. I thought we had something special here," Draco spat out scathingly.
"Well, we could if you'd just make a bloody commitment!" Harry yelled.
"What? I'm not the commitment-phobe in this relationship, or rather intimacy as you so wisely put it, Potter," Draco scowled.
"So you're saying I am?! You're just such a....such a....EMOTIONAL FUCK-WIT!" Harry burst out.
"I am not!" Draco yelled, at a loss for a suitable comeback.
"Yes you are!" Harry proclaimed loudly.
"Oh, and how so?" Draco challenged, glaring at Harry as Hermione looked on in wonder ("Boy, are these seekers drama queens," she thought).
"Well, for starters, you just refuse to acknowledge our-"
"Intimacy?" Draco cut in sarcastically. Harry growled (quite sexily, Draco noted) at him.
"I know you're ashamed of me!" Harry accused.
"What?!" Draco looked utterly dumbfounded.
"You've never told any of your uppity Slytherin friends about us!" Harry was getting a bit red in the face. Draco noted in the back of his mind how cute Harry looked when flushed.
"Oh, and our intimacy is common knowledge among your little Gryffindor buddies?!" Draco retorted, also getting a bit red in the face.
Harry noticed in the back of his mind how beautiful Draco's porcelain face looked when flushed.
"The only reason I kept it secret is because I thought you wanted me to," Harry said, getting a more than a little frustrated.
"Well, I didn't think you wanted your jumped-up Gryfindork chums to know that you were being intimate with a baddy Slytherin!!" Draco revealed.
Harry noticed that when Draco got really flustered, a little vein in his forehead started to throb quite sexily. To be quite honest, he wanted to kiss it (Harry and his weird fetishes)....
"Well, I'm not ashamed!" Harry yelled at Draco's sexy throbbing vein.
"Well, neither am I!" Draco yelled louder.
"I'll shout it to the whole bloody world if you want me to," Harry said, walking towards Draco until they were nose to, er, chin.
"I'll shout it even louder if you want me to," Draco whispered, as he ran his hand through Harry's hair. Harry's eyes fluttered.
Draco leaned to Harry's ear. "You know I would," he whispered, his warm breath tickling Harry's ear. Harry's knees buckled, but Draco held him up as he planted soft butterfly kisses on his ear and neck.
"Ahem," Hermione said quietly. They ignored her.
"I love you Draco," Harry whispered, looking up at Draco from under hi unnaturally long eyelashes (it had to be magic; those babies seemed a foot long). His heart thumped loudly in his ears like the hooves a thousand hippogriffs.
"I love you, too," Draco whispered. Harry's heart leaped for joy inside his chest as Draco kissed him softly yet passionately.
"Awwww!" Hermione gushed loudly, clapping. Harry and Draco broke apart, both blushing madly due to their romantic theatrics.
"That is THE sweetest thing I have ever had the pleasure and good fortune to witness!" Hermione continued to gush, eyes tearing slightly, hands clasped over her heart. Who knew she was such a closet romantic at heart?
She walked up to Draco and grabbed his face in her hands. Draco was too surprised to do anything except look at her like she was mental (which he was starting to beleive she was).
"You treat him right, you do, Draco Malfoy," she said, shaking his head with every word she spoke. Draco was slightly afraid.
"You love him so," she continued, tears now flowing freely from her chocolate brown eyes. "I know you'll take good care of him."
She moved on to Harry and grabbed his face in her hands just as she had done Draco.
"I..." sniffle "am just so...." sniffle, sniffle "happy for you!!" she gushed and bursts into tears of joy all over Harry's Quidditch robes. He hugged her back as she squeezed him as only a true friend could.
"If anyone deserves true love, it's you, Harry James Potter," she choked out in between sobs of joy for her friend. She felt as if a weight had been lifted off of her shoulders; that she could finally stop worrying about him so much.
Just then Ron walked into the room.
"Madam Pomfrey says he'll be fine......What the bloddy hell?!" he trailed off as he saw the peculiar scene in front of him.
Draco rolled his eyes.
"The know-it-all crying I can handle, but if Weasley here bursts into sobs all over me, its over, Harry," Draco said. He smiled fondly at Harry.
Harry smiled back.
THE END....I think...
Author's Note: So, there you have it? I wasn't planning to end the whole story when I started this chapter, but it seemed like such a good place to, you know? Don't count out more chapters or a sequel, you never know.
Well, anyway, I enjoyed writing this chapter, and I hoped you enjoyed reading it. Drop a review if you can spare one.