AN: This is a cute little scene I thought up one boring math class in 1998. Still makes me laugh out lout when I read it, so I thought I'd share.

Disclaimer: Mulder, Scully and Skinner aren't mine. The Danish, however, is.

Scully vs. the Danish

[Scene:In the basement office. SCULLY and SKINNER are beginning the monthly expenses review without MULDER. SCULLY seems uneasy and dying to leave, which SKINNER believes is simply a symptom of MULDER's absence.]

SKINNER: ...and that's pretty much what it's looking like in the way of travel expenses...

*SCULLYTHOUGHT* ...sooooo Huuungryyy!!! Musn't...jeopardize....career...by leaving...boring...meeting...

SKINNER: Also, the projected expense bracket for the next month has been updated....

*SCULLYTHOUGHT* who cares? Mulder's probably going to drag me off to Siberia because someone saw an alien in a snowbank. What do I care about expense projections?*

MULDER:(walks in carrying a stack of papers and a folded up newspaper under one arm) Sorry I'm late. (He walks over to the seat beside SCULLY and drops his papers on the desk. The newspaper unfolds to reveal THE APPLE DANISH WITH CREAM CHEESE ICING)
MULDER: Good morning, Scully. *smiles*

*SCULLYTHOUGHT* ...!!!...

SKINNER: As we were saying, Agent Mulder...

*SCULLYTHOUGHT* That danish looks soooo gooood.... maybe if I can get him to leave the room...

SCULLY: Mulder, did you remember to bring the file from our last case?

Mulder:(rummaging through the stack of files he brought with him) Here it is. (hands her file)

SCULLY: Thanks.

*SCULLYTHOUGHT* Damn!

SKINNER: Yes, about that case...

*SCULLYTHOUGHT* Maybe if I just strangle him...he can't eat an APPLE DANISH WITH CREAM CHEESE ICING if he's dead...or unconscious...

MULDER: But sir, I thought we'd already gone over this...

*SCULLYTHOUGHT* Look at him...he's not even looking at it! *pause* or me, either...maybe I can reach it without him noticing...

SKINNER:I've told you before, Mulder, they just don't want to believe...

~*~*~*~[TIME PASSES]~*~*~*~

*SCULLYTHOUGHT* He probably doesn't even like apples. Or brown sugar...*sniff*..cinnamon...*sniff*... cloves..*sniff*..mmmm...nutmeg...

MULDER: Scully, what do you think?

*SCULLYTHOUGHT* !*#@% !!!

SCULLY: Uhhh...well, I think that...*pause*

SKINNER: Scully, are you feeling alright?

MULDER: Yeah, you haven't even touched your Danish...

END