Okay after many, many, many months I've decided to maybe do a few more chapters for this one. Seems to be a big hit so I may as well add on to it. Granted I doubt this one is going to be as good, it's kinda just to get me in the mood and my brain working. Anyway enjoy!
It had been hours since she had seen the inside of the manor. She dropped her case of ammo and her weapons by the doorway as she entered her room. She sat down on her bed, and began the arduous task of undoing her boots.
An early morning training session had been ordered, and on top of that a surprise mission had come up just as the training session was coming to an end.
Exhausted, she flung her boots to the far corner of the room and looked at herself. She was covered in mud and sweat, she felt absolutely filthy from head, to toe.
It had been an easy mission just 10 maybe 20 freaks, nothing she couldn't handle. But why they decided to show up in the middle of a bog was beyond her. There she was hacking freaks up while knee deep in freezing cold muck. She shivered, and began undressing, she was longing for a hot shower.
She tossed her uniform into the same corner as her boots, her long black socks soon followed. She pulled on her terrycloth robe and grabbed her toiletries. She had a long trek over to the showers.
Integra had been promising her that she'd put a shower in her small bathroom. But she had yet to see it come true. She plodded wearily across the manor to the shower/locker room. A thick humid mildew smell wafted through her nostrils, apparently some of her team mates had already come and gone.
She pulled her robe off and entered what was the female shower room. It had been hastily built upon her arrival. Seeing as she was the only female on the team. It was basically just a shower in the mens shower room with a stall built around it.
She didn't mind it too much. Walter on the other hand had been after Integra for months about how indecent it was to have a mixed shower room. But adding a women's locker room (especially for just one woman and a vampire no less) didn't seem to be at the top of her list.
Seras didn't mind too much, the guys were gracious enough to give her space. Not too mention while she was doing her "waking up routine" they were asleep in their beds.
She turned the water on, giving a yelp as icy water rained down on her. She scooted out of the way of the spray until the hot water kicked in. When the temperature was to her liking she grabbed her soap and began working the grime and mud off.
"Nothing like a hot shower" she said to herself. She began singing a tune she had heard in the van ride home from her mission, it was a song she hadn't heard in years. It was from a movie she saw when she was still in school, it brought back memories of running around with her friends. She belted out the little bits of the song she knew as loud as she could while washing the muck out of her hair.
Love me, love me, say that you love me,
Fool me, fool me, go on and fool me,
Love me, love me, pretend that you love me,
Lead me, lead me, just say that you need me!
She was enjoying herself quite a bit, she didn't hear the door swing open as a tribe of her fellow team mates came in. They had just come back from a quick dinner and were also there to get the muck from that nights mission off before going to bed.
A few of them snickered heartily at her as the began to wash up. It wasn't the first time they had heard her wonky voice in the shower.
She was on the second verse of the song while she shut her eyes and rinsed the conditioner out of her hair. She thought her hair was never going to rinse out, she could still feel her hair heavy with conditioner. She opened her eyes and gave a shrill scream.
She was covered in thick, black tar colored blood. In fact she was ankle deep in it, and it was rising quickly. She rubbed her eyes trying feebly to get the blood out her eyes. Her hair was slick with blood and it clung to her skull. She screamed for it to stop, and began to fiddle madly with the faucets. Grabbing both knobs she twisted them frantically, instead of them turning the water off they popped off in her hand. Blood spurted out form the wall like a high powered hose.
She was now knee deep in blood. She finally gave up and busted out of the stall, blood gushed out onto the wet tile floor, she slid to halt as she noticed that 25 of her male team mates stood naked in front of her, a mix of humor, and horror on their faces.
Flustered and scared out of her mind she went to leap back into her stall, but the blood that flowed out of the stall made the floor slick. She slipped and fell, a loud, wet THWACK bounced off the walls, as her butt met the tile. A few of her team mates began to snigger slightly, while some of the more polite ones started over to her to see if she was okay.
Seras was utterly mortified, before anyone could come to her aid she half crawled half slid her way back into her stalls, slamming the door behind her.
She brought her blood covered knees to her chest and shivered, what was happening? Had she finally snapped? Blood still poured out of the shower head. She listened as the men bewildered at her quickly finished and exited.
"Seras are you sure your alright?" one her mates asked through the stall door.
"Fine just fine, I'll be out in a bit." she laughed nervously.
She was now waste deep in black sticky blood. It seemed like it would never end. She didn't dare leave her stall, she was already embarrassed enough as it was.
She curled up in a sad little ball, waiting for them to leave. How was she ever going to live this down? Half of them already treated her like she was a leper, but this was just icing on the cake! There she was naked, covered in blood, and worse yet they had probably heard her singing! She wanted to curl up and die in the stall right then, and there.
She heard the stall door click open. She felt a chill as the blood gushed forth from her stall.
"That's a good look on you Police Girl, I always thought red was your color." sniggered Alucard.
She looked up at him he was leaning in the doorway of the stall, a shit eating grin on his face.
She brought her knees tighter to herself, "GO AWAY ALUCARD!" she shrieked.
"Oh come on Police Girl, it's nothing I haven't seen before." he chuckled.
Seras was about to slam the door on his face when a light went on in her head, "it was you wasn't it!" she screamed.
He straightened himself up and tried to look serious, but couldn't stop a grin from breaking through.
Seras lunged at him, quickly forgetting her modesty, she grabbed a handful of the gloppy blood and slung it in his face. This only made him cackle with glee.
"I swear Alucard if you ever" she yelled as she tackled him tot he ground.
Seras was livid, she began punching Alucard, his laughter only growing stronger.
"But Sera's...heh heh... I was bored with Integra...hee hee oww.... she was getting too cautious.. Oww hey not the eye!" he twisted, and flipped her on her back pinning her wildly swinging arms and legs under his strong grasp, "come now no harm done right?" giving her another sly grin.
"Wrong," she shouted, and began to worm her way out of his grip, "I hate you, you lousy, good for nothing prat... it's a shame I can't kill you" she snarled in between breaths.
Alucard was just about to pin her once again but was interrupted by a stern, "Ahem?"
"What the hell is going on in here?" Integral stood in the doorway, a loaded pistol in her hand, "I hear that there's a problem in the shower room and this is what I find!" she bellowed.
Sera's tried to heft a now stone solid Alucard off of her, "get off you big dead oaf," she whispered.
The two of them stood up.
Walter came around the corner ready to attack whatever beast had broken into the room, but stopped short when he saw Seras, he gave a quick, "oh my, " and exited.
"Walter grow up!" Integra snapped, "how did this happen? Why? Answer me one of you!"
"Alucard did it Sir Integra, seems that I've become the new target for his pranks. He-"
Integra swiftly put a hand up to stop her from speaking, "I don't want to hear anymore. Alucard if I even so much as think that you are pulling another prank!"
Alucard gave her an dramatic bow, "Master, I swear to you I will never prank another living soul again!"
Integra caught his wry comment, "see to it that you don't prank any of the unliving souls as well Alucard."
She gave and exasperated sigh and left, a blushing Walter following after her.
Alucard nudged her, "she seems cranky."
"Screw you Alucard." she muttered.
"Like that definitely" he snickered, giving her blood soaked form another look.
Seras sighed angrily, and walked over to a nearby shower, there was no sense in being modest with her master any longer. She began rinsing off.
She was hoping he would leave, but he hung around a bit longer.
"You know," he said after a long awkward silence, "you didn't have to be such a tattletale."
Seras spun around mid shampoo, "what was I supposed to do? Sure some of your pranks have been funny, but this one was only humorous to you! I was totally mortified!" she said bitterly.
Alucard cackled once again. Seras finished up and turned the water off.
"What are you laughing at?" she asked.
"I just remembered the look on Integra's face as she walked in." he gave an excellent rendition of her shocked expression.
Seras smiled, "yeah Walter looked rather appalled as well!" she giggled, forgetting for a split second how angry he had made her.
"See Police Girl, this was funny on several levels, it was really quite brilliant when you think about it, " he tossed her a towel, her robe now to filthy to be of any use.
"Whatever Alucard, just lay off for awhile. Or we'll both be looking for a new place to stay."
She wrapped the towel around her and walked with Alucard back to the lower levels of the mansion.
They past Walter on the way down, he blushed again and ducked into a nearby room. Seras couldn't help but laugh.
Okay there you have it. I guess it was kind of a twisted ,mean prank, but I still thought it was pretty funny. By the Way the song she was singin was Lovefool by the Cardigans. Not sure why I picked it, I just thought it was the type of thing Seras would sing in the shower.
Lemme know what you think, and hopefully in a few weeks I'll have something else.