Jack sees Will and Elizabeth being all mushy and romantic, and he feels left out. So the crew, Will and Elizabeth sing him a little something. Dedicated to the great Captain Jack Sparrow!! Captain of the Black Pearl!! My first attempt at humor, so please be nice. Hehehe...I don't own anything, the voices in my head do. Savvy? This may turn into a musical...it depends...mostly on the number of reviews I get for this hint hint one of those infomercial girls comes out: Thisficisnotresponsibleforanydamagetothereaders.

It was a beautiful, sunny, cloudless, day on the Black Pearl...A normal day...

Will: I love you, Elizabeth.

Elizabeth: I love you, Will.


Jack: (groan) ).(

(Bored, Jack walks over to Anamaria, who is at the wheel.)

Jack: 'Ello, Anamaria.

Anamaria: (raises hand) What d'YOU want?!?!?! -.-

Jack: O.o Hehehe...nothin'...to self Just smile, nod, an' back away slowly...

4 hours later...

Will: I love you, Elizabeth.

Elizabeth: I love you, Will.

Jack: I love YOU, rum.

Will and Elizabeth: O.o

Jack: Wha'?

Will: Ummm....Jack, did you just say "I love you" to your rum?

Jack: Yes, ye' I did. You got a problem with tha'?

Elizabeth: We-ell.....

Jack: (sarcastically) I feel loved....stalks off


Jack: Who does she think she is? That girl has tangled with the wrong pirate!

Gibbs: (fiddling with something absentmindedly) Darn right!

Jack: No one tries to slap Captain Jack Sparrow! Dismissed! Rejected! Publicly humiliated! Why, it's more than I can bear.

Gibbs: But-but wha' 'bout Giselle, and Scarlett an' all th' other....

Jack: (glare) -.-

Gibbs: Hehehe...never mind...more rum?

Jack: Wha' for? Nothin' 'elps. I'm disgraced.

Elizabeth: (whispers to Will) He turned down RUM!! This can't be good....

Jack: I's just...I...I feel unloved!!!

Will: Who, you? Never! Jack, you've got to pull yourself together.
Gosh it disturbs me to see you, Jack

Anamaria: (under her breath) Damn righ' it does!

Will: (Ahem) Continuing...(pointed glare at Anamaria)

Looking so down in the dumps

Elizabeth: Ev'ry guy here'd love to be you, Jack
Even when taking your...err...lumps

Gibbs: There's no man on board as admired as you
You're ev'ryone's favorite guy
Ev'ryone's awed and inspired by you
And it's not very hard to see whyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!

Anamaria: Yes it is!!

Jack: -.-

Will: Noooo...oooone's... slick as Jack
No one's quick as Jack
No one's hair is as incredibly thick as Jack's
For there's no pirate in town half as pirate...ly

Elizabeth: Perfect, a pure paragon!

Gibbs: You can ask any pirate out there
And they'll tell you whose ship they prefer to be on

Will: No one's been around like Jack

Anamaria: -.- (turns on Jack) You wanna explain tha' one?...

Jack: O.o He...he...wha'd I do?

Elizabeth: A captain like Jack
No one's got beaded hair like Jack

Jack: As a pirate, yes, I'm intimidating!

Gibbs, Will and Elizabeth: My what a guy, that Jack!
Give five "hurrahs!"
Give twelve "hip-hips!"

Gibbs: Jack is th' best
And the rest is all t' rest

Will: No one drinks like Jack
Commandeers ships like Jack

Elizabeth: For there's no one as burly and brawny

Jack: As you ca' see I've got much to spare

Gibbs: Not a bit of him's scraggly or scrawny

Jack: Tha's right!
An' ev'ry last inch of me's covered with 'air

Anamaria: Thanks for sharing...

Elizabeth: No one gets slapped like Jack
Matches wits like Jack!

Will: In a drinking match nobody drinks like Jack!

Jack: When I wa' a lad I drank four bottles of rum
Ev'ry mornin' to help me ge' loot
And now tha' I'm grown I drink five bottles o' rum
So I'm roughly as drunk as a coot

Elizabeth: No one fights like Jack
Wears those hats like Jack
Then goes tromping around stealing treasure like Jack

Jack: I use gold in all of my decorating!!

Will: Say it loud

Who's the captain and proud?

Elizabeth: And I'll say it once more

Who's the hero next door?

Jack: Why thank you, lass

Anamaria: Hero? Some hero!

Elizabeth: Who's a super success?

Don't you know?

Can't you guess?

Gibbs: And his name's





gives up

Gibbs: Ahh

Entire crew: JAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!

Jack: IT'S CAPTAIN JACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -.- tries to run off

Anamaria: After we did that for you, you have the nerve? (slap)

Jack: (rubs the spot where he got slapped) Not sure I deserved tha'...

A/N - Sooo...Please review!!! (pause) I'll give you chocolate!! I MIGHT continue with this and turn it into a musical...if I get enough good reviews...(Bugs Bunny appears) Eh, that's all folks!