Walking in (Send me an angel)
I don't own the X-Men. All characters belong to Marvel except Margaret who
was my creation, as well as John and Roy, so please don't sue. I'm not
making money from it.
Summary: AU. Rogue finds a job after running away from her parents, it
involves touching and taking care of people she would never have imagine.
Feedback: Yes please: mayirella@yahoo.com.mx, good or bad reviews,
comments, anything are more than welcome :)
Thanks to: Sandrine, for the beta and the Wolverine and the Rogue for the
Music: Lyrics at the end of the fic: from Real Life, a cool Australian band
from the 80´s, the song is called "Send me an angel" you can find it

The only thing I know is that I am a mutant. A MUTANT, for God's Sake...
well, that is only if God exists, or angels for that matter. Because after
what Adam and Eve did... if he does indeed exist, then I think he is still
pissed...you know, with all the diseases and mutations nowadays. I haven't
met anyone so far who considers a mutation a gift or a blessing. Everyone
hates us, considers us freaks, doesn't accept us in public schools or for
normal jobs, always talking about how green our skin is or how long our
tail is (well not in my case but I have heard those comments). Even our own
parents. Take mine for example. They kicked me out of the house coz I was
kinda different. I don't blame them though, but...your own parents? And
you're still saying that God exists? They literally freaked out when they
discovered I was a mutant. The only thing that crossed my mind was to get
away from them as far as possible, so with very little, I ran.
Being on my own made me realize that I was the kind of person who could
take care of her own. I got several jobs along the road (with the only
condition of not telling a living soul I was different), save some money
for the future to come and other stuffs. Of course, being a 20 year-old
female travelling on her own can leads to somewhat difficult situations,
but you learn to defend yourself. That's how I've survived for at least a
year, working as a waitress in various restaurants and washing cars in gas
stations. Everybody wondered why I always wore so many clothes. If they
only knew that the mere touch of my skin could kill them...nice mutation
huh? Life absorbing "power", my ass! I was damned, condemned to be a
prisoner of my own skin, not being able to touch a single living thing
because it'd die in seconds. And if it was a human, I would not only absorb
his/her life but also his/her memories.
I got tired of being in the same place so I took the decision to leave. I
didn't know where I was going when I hitchhiked a ride in that truck, but
anywhere would be fine.
I ended up north, Canada to be exact. One morning when I was reading the
newspaper, an ad caught my attention: "Looking for a baby-sitter, capable
of taking care of a 1 year and a half boy, please communicate to ..." and
the phone number. I mentioned I could look after myself and, after all, I
had all kinds of job, right? So this was not gonna be the exception. I
could work on that, maybe half time, and the time left on something else;
that way I could earn a lil' bit more.
I called and a man gave me directions. What immediately struck me was the
man's voice, deep and very manly. It sounded like the kind of man that
doesn't talk very often, and isn't inclined to do so, you know...short and
direct words. Interesting.
The house was on a way up the hill. Damn, how am I supposed to climb this
up? Aw, come on, girl, you can do it!
Let me tell you that when I was there, I fell in love with the place at
once. It was surrounded by a lot of trees and you just felt at peace. The
house was kinda big: never in my life back in Mississippi had I seen
something like that. I knocked and a man opened up.
OMG! This man was a good looking one. His tight T-shirt and jeans only
underlined the muscles of his well-defined body. But what was the most
remarkable was the angry and sad look in his eyes. I mean the eyes just
caught my attention. They were such a beautiful hazel.
I didn't know why this man would carry an expression like that. I could
feel that something was missing in his life. Yeah, you could tell that by
the look. I stared at him for what felt like a long time. He started to
frown when I didn't say a word; even that small gesture mesmerized me.
"You came for the job kid?" Back into the world.
"How old are you?"
"Almost 21, sir."
"Sure you are capable of taking care of kids.?"
KidS? The ad said one.
"Y-yeah." I stuttered.
"Come in," the man said in a harsh voice. "Uh tell me....."
"Oh....I´m Marie, Marie D´Acanto."
"Well Marie, do you have experience with children?"
OK, that sounded like Mr. M Jackson...(no offense sir)
"Well sir, to be honest I have never worked with kids before. I've been a
car-washer and a waitress since I ran away from home. Kids won't be a
problem though...I think."
"So you are a runaway?" His frown got even deeper. Isn't that so obvious?
I mean, I carry a bag with my personal things and all, I thought it should
"Kind of," maybe he didn't like that. Oh, might be a problem there. By the
way, he's looking at me, he doesn't look very confident in my capacity to
take care of children. I think I'm not going to get the job. I started to
feel nervous. His gaze was so intense...
The man gave me a once-over. That made me shudder. I looked away.
"I think you will do." Really? Oh, for a moment there, I thought he was
going to say no thanks-
Suddenly I heard a soft crying.
"Oh, bloody hell! Well, you better come and see who you're gonna take care
of, kid."
He let me enter the house, turning away from me and taking long footsteps
ahead, almost running. I was left behind, giving me the opportunity to look
around: one floor house, not a fancy one, common furniture, no wall paint,
2 windows and a balcony, wooden floor. It felt a little bit hot inside,
good thing with this weather!
I followed him quickly after my first inspection of the house. I cautiously
stepped into the room where the crying was louder.
A chubby little boy with dark, pointy and messy hair stared at me, still
crying behind hazel eyes...just like the man's. They were beautiful.
"Marie, this is John...my son."
WHAT? His son!? Aw, damn it, Marie, he is married! For Pete´s sake,
married! ....Wait! What the hell was I thinking there for a minute? Come on
Marie, you are 20 and he's like what...35? Be reasonable!
"Yeah, sorry, you were saying..."
"I told you that this is the kid you are going to take care of, from 5 to
10 p.m. every day."
"Ohhh OK...." Alright, that must have sounded doubtful.
"Don't worry, I´ll pay you a good amount."
OH, no, don't get me wrong there.
"Oh, no, I was not worried about that. It's just that...well, I live far from
here and it's quite a long and difficult way from where I live. Besides, I
was kinda planning to secure another job..."
"Ohh," the man said.
"And, the place is great, but it's difficult to get here, especially on
He was silent.
Focusing on the boy, one question immediately came to my mind, and the
words left my mouth before I could stop them: "Sir, well I just wanted to
ask about his..." and he cut me, with a harsh and somewhat exasperate tone.
"I know what you're gonna ask. His mother died...2 months ago, that's the
most common question that every baby-sitter has been asking since a month
ago. You are not the only one John have had, there have been like 6 o 7
before you. The first one was very direct with that, the other ones a
little bit more subtle. By now, I'm used to it enough to tell when the
question is coming, and giving the right answer before it ends."
Very subtle Marie, makes you one of the *Asking the man what happened to
the mother* baby-sitter group.
"I'm sorry," and I knew he could tell I meant it. One for the lost of his
wife, and second because I could be such a dumb in these situations. I
wasn't used to them.
"Not more than me." That sad look in his eyes again. What I would give to
see him happy for an instant.
I knew it then: I had to stay. I had to change things, to be the best baby-
sitter he could ever wish for, to take care of little John and of him, if
he let me. I could feel a strong connection between us. I didn't questioned
why, it was just there.
I have to take the job. It's now or never.
"Well, I take it," I said firmly.
"Sure about that kid?" he's looking kind of confuse.
"Yeah. I will make an effort." I bit my lower lip.
The man then said :
"Well you can stay here if you want...I have plenty of room. The house is
big enough"
Yeah so can I see, I'm not that oblivious...and it's also a lil' bit
"You can have 3 meals and a room."
That's a good offer...
"Ohh that's grea-...mm, I mean...yeah, sounds good to me."
"We have a deal?"
"Good. When can you start?"
Uhhh? Uhh!
"That's what I wanted to hear. I have to go now. All John needs is in the
refrigerator. And if you need to change his diapers or something, all his
stuffs are in the room at the end of the hallway."
And grabbing his keys he walked to the door.
"Ah sir?"
"Call me Logan, OK?" and he walked to where I was standing and shook my
"O-OK, Logan."
I turned around to take John's bottle and when I turned again, he was
gone... Wow, that was creepy! How the hell did he managed to exit that
fast? The only thing I heard was his boots on the wooded floor. He must
walk pretty quickly. Strange man. Strange but attractive...Aw hell Marie, not
Taking care of John was not that difficult. In fact, he was a lovely kid,
even though he was a little "savage": growling at me when we didn't agree
on what story I should read to him or during bath time.
Time passed, almost 6 months, and I started feeling tired of just being in
the house with little John. Feeling more confident, I dared to hang out
with him outside in the woods. Let me tell you it was a lot better, fresh
air, the trees that surrounded us, just the view was so magnificent, it
made all my problems go away. And I think it had the same effect on John,
he seemed more relaxed somehow.
With Logan everything went fine. He wasn't a big talker. I thought he had
an amazing voice, he should use it more often, so deep and sensual...Yeah I
know, I must sound a little taken with the guy.
Still, sometimes I felt I was having one sided conversations. Not that I'm
complaining or anything, but...well, from time to time you just need to
communicate, somehow. He only talked to me when he arrived every night at
the house. Hmm, by the way I wonder what he did to arrive that late...and
sweating -I could tell because of the dampness of his T-shirt. And also
awfully tired.
I was tempted to follow him one day, but with John in my arms, I couldn't.
He would start screaming or giggling or something, and that would catch his
So I stayed home, washing the dishes or the clothes, making dinner or
whatever. I felt like I was a wife taking care of her home, but with no
ring to show when someone would ask me what I did. Pretty shitty, huh?
"How's John behaving?," Logan asked.
"Ohh he's a very good boy, despite the growling, and sometimes, the bad
temper," I smiled. "Well, I guess even kids have bad days huh?," and I felt
myself smile broader.
"Yeah I know," and Logan laughed and smiled at me.
Those were unique moments, when I would see Logan smile. Hmmm, now that I
notice, I couldn't see a wedding ring on his finger.
"Logan? Have you ever thought of get- uh...I mean of-" I was about to ask,
somehow a little bit uncertain about his reaction. But with my eyes fixed
on his ring finger I took the courage to ask him right away when he cut
me...damn, just when I had the guts...
"I know what you are gonna ask and the answer is NO, I have no intentions
of looking for a substitute for his mother." His mood had just made a
spectacular 180° turn.
Jeez.....what is this man...a telepath? Again, very subtle move, Marie.
He got up and threw the dish into the dish washer, leaving me alone there.
Then he opened the door of the little balcony. I quickly got up too and
walk to where he was standing.
I had to fix this up quickly! I couldn't loose my nerves this time!
"Oh Logan, I'm sorry for being so...I mean with that stupid thought..."
"Don't feel bad." and he lit his cigar inhaling it strongly.
"It's just that when I see John I feel that he needs a mother. He's so
little, he needs someone to look after him, always. And I'm not saying that
he needs it only now, when he's so fragile, but when he grows up too. He'll
want to turn to someone for advice-"
The way he looked at me then. Oh my God. He was so angry. His eyes were on
fire, I could see the veins of his neck, pulsating strongly beneath the
skin. Despite of the chilly air he started sweating.
I was so close to him. I could feel his breath on my face. I wanted to run,
yet I couldn't. I had to fix this up.
Suddenly he scared me out of my thoughts when he grab my shoulders and told
"Well, let me tell you something kid, he only has his father, and that's
the only thing he needs!"
"Logan-" I felt so bad.
"Good night Marie." and he stormed back into the house, closing his door
room harshly.
Well done Marie! Now you have officially pissed the guy off!
In the middle of the night I heard like someone was crying. I couldn't tell
where the sound came from. I left my room and started searching for the
origin of the noise. Logan's room, I realised. I dared to open his door
just a little when a soft moan came from his mouth, then another, but I
couldn't hear quite well what he was saying, so I opened the door
completely. I saw him, twisting between the sheets. Then he remained
silent. I just stared at him: he looked as if he was in pain.
"Yuriko....why did you let me..."
OMG! It hit me then: Yuriko, she must have been his wife. And there he was,
crying for her. He must have loved her so much. That's why he wasn't
married, or even wanted to try and get into a relationship. Well that is at
least what I could assume.
I don't doubt he could look after himself alright, but shying away from the
world isn´t the best thing to do when you had a hard life. I wonder where
he did meet her. Logan seemed the loner kind of guy. Maybe he travels a
lot...or "travelled" before having such a responsibility. I mean, John is a
huge "take-care-of "package.
I was closing the door when the sound of it woke him up.
"Who's there?"
Great, now I'm busted!
"Ohh it's just me Logan. Marie."
"Please leave...."
Marie, Marie, when are you gonna learn?
I closed the door but remained silent for a few minutes outside his room,
thinking of what I had just heard. To my surprise, the noises started
coming again from behind his closed door, but this time, they were even
louder. I could hear him crying deeply and kept saying "Why Yuriko why...I
needed you so much...God doesn't exists you know, because if he did he-
he...that damn disease." Now he was having a conversation with his dead wife.
I didn't think it could get any sadder. It was so moving.
I felt the urgency to hold him, to tell him that everything was gonna be
okay. To calm him down, to take away his pain, his sorrow. I didn't know
why, but I needed to do it. A felt a single tear ran across my cheek ending
upon my lips. When, at the end of the hallway I heard a strong cry for
help...John! So I ran as fast as I could, entered his room and saw a crying
John trying to get out of his crib.
"What's the matter sugah?"
"B-dad d-dream," aw shit....
"Don't you worry sweetie, you're gonna be fine. I'm here with you. I won't
let anything bother you...even bad dreams."
"Go away?"
"Yes, I will make them go away sugah, just calm down please. Stop crying
shhh, everything is fine now. Marie's here."
I didn't notice when Logan entered. He just stood by the door, motionless.
I didn't have to turn around to know he was here, though: I could feel him.
After a while though, I moved to face him. He had this warm expression that
I had never seen before, except on rare occasions with John. It was the
only times he seemed truly relaxed, as if he could finally let his defences
down. But then I realised he wasn't looking at him: he was looking at me.
When he caught my stare, his usual mask slipped back in place. He turned
his back to me and walked away. I didn't know what to make of this. Hell, I
was too tired anyway. I sat in the rocking chair with John, still shaking
and crying a little. I kept comforting him and eventually, we both felt
The first thing I was aware of when I awoke, before even opening my eyes,
was the weight of John's still body in my arms. The second was that we were
not alone in the room.
I opened my eyes and Logan was standing there, in the exact same spot and
with the same expression as the night before. But this time, when I looked
up to him, he didn't shy away.

"He couldn't sleep and...uhh I thought that if he was having nightmares I
should stay with him..."
"Yeah, I can see that. Thank you." He was smiling! How cute. I felt myself
grin back.
"Marie, I was thinking. You certainly need to have your own space more
often, so I´ll give you the day off."
"Oh no, you don't have to do that. I'm doing fine"
"No, you are not. You work so hard. I know that taking care of this little
one can be such a pain in the neck, so... "
"No, it's not a pain in the neck! I like to take care of him, I do it with
all my heart. He's a special kid"
"Still, I insist. You need it."
Well, he may have a point there...besides I have to buy girl stuff like
deodorant, soaps, a new teeth brush...
"Well OK...I'm gonna buy some stuff I need...umm do you need something?"
"No, thank you, I'm fine"
"And John?"
"I´ll take care of him, all day, don't worry."
"OK, so, see you later and...thank you" I got up carefully and placed John
into his crib.
He just smiled at me.
I took a shower and had breakfast and got ready to spend my day off. I
really needed it, despite what I said. I needed to take my sweet time just
to hang around with myself, you know...to walk and admire the beautiful place
surrounding me. It was indeed very nice. It had a lake, and a park, even a
few stores in town. Not as big as a Walmart or K Mart, but anything you can
possibly need I bet you could get there. Almost at the end of the city was
a bar, the only bar nearby. I didn't want to go there. I know what bars
look like, and let's just say they are not my style.
When I came back home (Home? Jeez, must have passed a lot of time indeed to
call Logan's house home...), it was almost seven. The first thing I noticed
was a note that said: "Marie, John and I went out, don't stay awake and
wait for us. Logan". My! Where could they possibly be?
It took me almost 2 hours to find them. Let me tell you that it was a long
search. But when I was going to give up, it suddenly occurred to me that
the only place I hadn't searched was the bar. But how...how could it be
possible? I mean, it's a filthy place for a kid, you know.
So I entered that place. Aw gawd. It smelled kinda strange...like a mix of
sweat and alcohol and well...sex too. You could see at the corners people
making out. Not giving the complete show, but showing off alright. Yeah,
the "just look what I caught" thing. In the middle of the bar was a cage.
Even stranger huh? A cage? For what? Wild animals? I bet it, ha!
I stood there, looking around, hoping to find him on a bar stool or at a
table. I had no such luck. I got tired, but just when I was about to leave,
a bald man appeared in the centre of the cage. Grabbing a microphone he
"Ladies and gentleman...after so long...the Wolverine returns."
What? The Wolverine? Who the hell is that?
People were screaming of excitement.
"Who will dare to fight against this man? You?" and pointing out to a fat
man he laughed. "or maybe you?" and he pointed out to an old man.
I didn't understand, but I kept watching. To be honest, it made me curious.
Suddenly, a well toned tall man entered the cage. God, could he have a
broader back? Amazing body...nice arms...and nice butt...I bet a lot of
women are praying to have him between their sheets...Oh Damn Marie....what
are you thinking? You are incorrigible! But he was very handso-----WHAT?
LOGAN??OMG! What the hell is he doing here? For all the people in the world
HE had to be the Wolverine? GOD, isn't it a small world!
I was speechless, I couldn't move. Hell, I couldn't even think! After a few
moments I regained my senses but kept staring at him. He was looking at the
crowd, walking around the cage with a feline grace, when he stopped
abruptly, and then turned in my direction, seemingly looking for something.
I didn't even have the time to proceed what he was doing, he had already
spotted me and it felt as if his fierce gaze was burning into my eyes. It
was so intense, I couldn't help it: some lower parts of my body started
reacting, making me incredibly hot when he spotted me. Damn. He just smiled
and turned around.
My heart was beating like a bloody African drum...he had so much power over
me when he looked that way. The sweat running along his spine...it gave me
goose bumps. I had the sudden urge to go and leak it off him.
"Ladies and gentlemen: The Wolverine and his opponent"
And the fight started. I was mesmerised. Those movements, I mean, the way
his back arched when he punched the man, the strong muscles under the skin
as his arms were grabbing the collar of the man's shirt, the veins that
showed from his shoulder to his wrist , even the sweat coming down from
his forehead were making me weak at my knees. I can't describe it all, I
was still in a dream-like state of mind but suddenly...
"Ohh blast.... John!" I remembered that John was the reason why I was here
after all: I was supposed to baby-sit him. Well not today, but it still
felt like it was my duty to look out for him. With time, I came to love him
so much, that I couldn't bear the idea of something happening to him.
So the only bright idea that I thought of was asking the bartender. He was
very polite and told me that John was with his wife, Margaret, at the end
of the hall turning right and into the dressroom. Jeez, I would never have
imagined this place had actually dressrooms...bathrooms yes...but
Yet there I found her.
"Uhhh Are you Margaret?"
"Well yeah dear. And you are...?"
"Marie. John's baby-sitter."
"Well then aren't you supposed to be taking care of him?"
"I am. But I was given a day off today..."
"Ohh I see..."
"It didn't occur to me I would find John in this kind of place."
"Ohh dear it happened a lot after Yuriko died. Logan used to bring John
here while he fought"
"Ohh so I take he's a fighter then?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean the money he earns is because of the fights?"
"That and working here as a bartender. Roy, my husband is too old, you
know, to be in charge of this place all the time."
"I see." So, he's not only a tender father but a hard working man. Every
woman would give their left arm just to be near him. Lucky me. Although the
way I see Logan right now (and its only because I HAVE TO, mind you) is
like an employer, the father of the kid I'm taking care of, nothing more. I
wish it could be different though, he is a really nice guy once you pass
through the rude exterior.
I let out a sight. Margaret was looking at me from head to toe. It made me
"Aren't you a little bit young dear?"
"Young? I'm sorry, I don't understand?"
"For Logan I mean. I'm not sure a girl like you could fit the bill"
I blushed.
"But...no! I only take care of his son, that's all."
"Oh girl, don't tell me that having a man like him nearby doesn't give you
thoughts...well, you know, THAT kind of thoughts."
It sure as hell did!!!!!!!
"W-well, I..."
And to my supreme embarrassment, the door opened, revealing a Logan in all
his sweaty –and half-naked- glory.
"Logan, you finished him so quickly? Margaret asked casually.
"Yeah, he was as easy as pie."
I looked down.
"What are you doing here Marie? Aren't you supposed to be resting?" Logan
said with a harsh tone. "I gave you the day off! You didn't have to follow
"Ohh I got worried about..." but Margaret interrupted me.
"Ohh come on Logan, give her a break! She just got worried. Is that a crime
or something?"
"No." He turned to me and added: "I'm sorry, I just overreacted a little.
Let's go Marie." His voice softened; in fact, it sounded more like a
whisper. His facial muscles relaxed completely. It's quite the rare sight,
really, even after living with him for months. You know, he's not the –I'm
sorry- kinda man, but he actually genuinely looked sorry, and he must have
felt embarrassed at his outburst with Margaret here him. Mmhp.
"Ok." I took John in my arms and we exited the dressroom.
"Oh bye Margaret. Nice to meet you."
"Same here dear. Come by anytime."
It was dark outside. I was carrying John and couldn't see the path I was
walking on. I stumbled twice before Logan took John in his arms. For a
little kid he weighted too much.
"I'm sorry...for the way I reacted tonight."
"Don't worry about it."
"No, I admit I was wrong. I shouldn't have yelled at you."
"It's OK, Logan. Nothing happened."
"This means you are not mad at me?"
"Why would I be?"
"I don't know. Just because of the way I am I suppose."
He remained silent for long minutes.
"You worry too much. Even more than me."
"I do not!"
"Yes you do" and we both smiled.
As I said, Logan is not THAT bad, he does care for the people around him,
I'm counting myself as a part of his life now: I'm living with them, right?
I've spent a lot of time with his kid as well as with him...well, OK, not
exactly as much time with him. Despite his strong personality, we get along
well. We don't have like, these big fights like normal couples do...
Wait a minute: where did that CAME FROM? Normal couples? Hell, we are NOT A
COUPLE!! And definitely not a normal one. Shame you know, I wish we were,
because it would be more...ahhh! how can I put this...It would be like some
"happily ever after story ending"..Ughh I must sound pathetic now.
"Give me your hand, we are going to climb up."
So did I. I firmly grabbed his hand, realising for the first time how big
his hands were. Mine almost disappeared in his.
Finally we were home. He carried John to his room and rocked his crib a
little, so that he wouldn't wake up. Meanwhile I went in the kitchen. I
heard him then proceed to the bathroom, and he shouted from there:
"I´ll be out in five, I need a shower."
5 minutes later he emerged from the steamy room, towel in one hand, sweat
pants and chain around his neck and...what was that? A dogtag?
"I made chocolate."
"Yeah. I think it will be good for you...since you must have lost a lot of
energy tonight. When I lived in Mississippi I used to..." Ohh shut up Marie.
You don't want to bore the guy with your stories.
"Come on Marie. You were saying something. Tell me"
"No, it's probably not the best topic. I'm sorry." Oh great Marie, you are
the Queen of the fools now!
I felt a lump in my throat, so many memories came to me all of a sudden. I
remembered my home, my parents, the life I used to have, everything. I
needed to cry, but I wouldn't do that in front of him. Not here, not now.
"Hey it's alright" he whispered.
At first, I thought I couldn't. But I wanted to be sincere and honest, to
show him who I really am. I wanted for him to trust me, I didn't want to
hide anything, not really.
To finally find the strength to confide myself, to overcome my childish
fears, and the most important thing: I wanted Logan to accept me just the
way I am, to never be ashamed of me when I'm around, to love me, just the
way I love him now. I really must sound desperate but it's true. I had
fallen in love with this guy. I loved his rare genuine smiles, I loved it
when he was fighting in that filthy cage or when he would take John in his
arms. When he would talk to me, I loved his voice, that of a man with
determination and power.
But there were so many things to tell...
"Is just that...when...before I ran away, my momma used to give me a big mug
of hot chocolate when a day went bad, or in a rainy day. To cheer me up.
She was...well, I bet she still is a good woman."
"Why do you say that?"
"Well, after some incidents happened, she didn't want me near her anymore.
I-I don't blame her though, not really"
"Logan, I prefer not to talk about it."
"What do you mean?"
I kept silent.
"Marie, can I ask you something?"
OH great! Just great...the last thing I need right now is to play Twenty
"Why did you run away? Why do you always wear too many clothes?"
OK that's two questions in one. Still I'm not sure if I'm up to play.
After a long pause I spoke again.
"I...I'm different Logan"
"Different. In what sense?"
"I can't tell you..."
"Yes you can. What is it Marie? What are you hiding? What are you afraid
of? You can tell me anything darlin´. I think that after all this time you
must trust me, at least a little."
"No, Logan. If I tell you what I really am, you could only be
"But why?"
"I know that after I tell you what I am you will kick me out. I have no
other place to stay...so please don't make me ...."
I disgusted myself by begging and sounding so whinny, but I really didn't
want to leave, I felt good in there. I felt like I was at home, with him
and John. I felt –safe. And I could feel tears ran down my cheeks. He
walked over to me, coming closer and closer I almost felt his body against
mine. He tried to brush them away but I didn't let his hand come close
"Marie, darlin´...anything you tell me is fine."
I couldn't speak, my throat was constricted. I couldn't even look at him in
the eyes.
"I don't want to sound rude darlin´ but were you a victim of rape?
I shook my head.
"Did you kill someone?"
Again I shook my head
"Then what is it?"
"It's my skin."
"What about it?" and he took my gloved hand in his then took the glove
off...despite my efforts. The glove was off now.
"I'm a mutant, I can't touch people. I hurt them if I do"
His eyes almost popped out. But outside the obvious surprise, his
expression was unreadable. Or maybe it was me who didn't want to know.
"OK, ok, I have to leave immediately. I´ll be out in two minutes I promise.
Thank you for everything-"
"Now hold on your horses there Marie...what are you saying?" he stopped me
putting a hand on my shoulder.
"I have to go now..."
"I can see I will make you uncomfortable...and-"
Holy shit!!!!!!
"OK Marie, see these? I'm not very far from being different either..."
I took a really good look at those blades. My! they were so long! I was
light-headed I know it was wrong but I just had to touch them....
"Easy there darlin´ they are way too sharp" he warned me.
I met his gaze and just when I was trying to get my hand away from his
claws he took it in his own ...and sweetly placed a quick kiss to my
palm...too fast for my skin to react.
"You are not alone kid. You don't have to be afraid of your gift anymore."
"It's a curse....."
"No darlin´ it's not"
"Of course it is..."
"Do you think this is a curse?" he pointed out at his claws.
"No, I think it's a powerful weapon"
"For a long time, I considered these a curse. Now I see them as something
useful, for example to defend myself although I don't have to show them off
too often or to slice things like uhh...fruits. You know, so that I don't
have to buy the entire silverware set..." and he winked at me.
I blushed.
"I bet they are. Do you have any other mutation?"
"Well a good healing factor and enhanced senses"
Wow! That was an awesome mutation....not like mine.....inability of touch!
"Wow....cool! I mean, if you cut yourself you don't have to worry."
He laughed
"Yeah, that's part of the fun." His face then turned serious again. "Marie,
have you ever tried to control your mutation?"
"Yeah, but I've had no success so far."
He must have caught my disappointment because he lifted my chin and told
"Someday you are gonna be able to touch again. I´ll be by at your side when
that moment comes. I´ll help you."
AWW SHIT....! He may look like a baddass, but he really has a soft spot
somewhere in his heart.
"So...what are you saying?"
"About what?"
"Ohh, well...If you are not afraid of me..."
"How could I be darlin´? The way I see it, it must be you who should be
afraid of me."
"No, I'm not." I told him confidently.
"So what do you say?"
"You sure you want me 24/7?" I grinned.
"Absolutely." He grinned at me back
"OK then...yeah!"
"Thank you darlin´...John and I need you."
OMG He does? I mean the little boy, he sure needs someone, with all the
nursery thing, but him? YAY! OK don't get too excited...! Down girl!
"Yeah, I do"
It's been a year since I've started working for Logan. Well, I can't really
say that anymore, I mean "I work for him". It feels more like I'm a part of
his family; the family nanny if you can say that. We grew closer, hanged
out just the three of us. My life changed: I learnt that I was not alone,
and that my curs—err gift, was nothing to be embarrassed of. Daily he
helped me to control it with meditation, but nothing had happened so far.
My birthday was coming. I didn't want to tell him, but he found out anyway.
"I know that your birthday is coming."
"Hmm, let's say it's a lucky guess" and he winked at me.
"In 5 days, yeah..."
"Ah! I was right then... How many?"
"22 huh?"
"Yeah." Old enough if you are wondering...oh no, sounds like John's crying.
"I better know what's up with him."
When I entered John's room I saw him trying to get out of his crib.
"Shh John, what's the matter?"
"Bad dream..."
"Ohh sugah don't worry, I'm here now"
"Marie, are you mommy?"
Ohh God. How to explain to a 2 and a half years old boy that I was not his
"No John, but I love you so much" and I hold him tightly in my arms. I
didn't realize then that his cheek was touching mine. Without a barrier.
"And mommy?"
I noticed Logan when he entered the room. He was coming closer to us.
"Mommy is in heaven John, and she sent us Marie like a guardian angel, to
take care of you"
"Yeah sweetie, me, I´ll take care of you and love you so much. Don't
"For a long time?"
I looked at Logan. He smiled and nodded. I felt nervous all of a sudden,
the way he looked at me, so tender...
"Yes John, for keeps."
Yawning John returned to Morpheus arms.
"Logan..." I said trying to hide the emotion in my heart." I'm touching
John. Without a barrier."
"Just look." And there was the miracle. I put my hand on his face and
touched his eyebrows, nose and cheeks. Logan closed his eyes.
"Ohh darlin?" it was almost a whisper. "that's great."
"I can control it."
"But what did you do?"
"Nothing. I concentrated on John, tried to soothe him, to calm him..."
"So it worked, the concentration, the meditation. After all this time..."
"I guess." I was so excited!
I put John back in his crib, and exited the room.
Opening the door to the balcony I stepped outside. The chilly air made the
hair of my neck stand. Logan came behind me.
"It's beautiful isn't it?"
Without taking his eyes of me he said:
"Yeah it is..."
My heart was going to explode! He walked to where I was standing. So close,
he was now so close..
"I wish you could stay with us...forever"
"Logan, I—"
Kissing my hand he proceeded to come closer to me, if that could be
"I—"He must have sensed my nervousness, because he slowed his movements,
but he didn't stop.
"Don't be afraid of what you are darlin´, of what you feel..."
Was I that obvious? Or the man was a telepath himself?
"No, is not that..."
"I can tell you are nervous."
"Logan I have never..." He nodded and taking me by the waist he pulled me
against him.
And then my senses went into overload. Our bodies making a delicious
friction, my nose and lips a breath away from his, my feet barely touching
the floor. He pulled me so hard that my lips crushed his. I had never felt
something like that, so electrifying, so wild, based on pure instinct,
nothing had ever compared to that.
I let out a moan, and after what seemed eternity, tried to break the kiss
to breath again.
"M-mm Logan..."
"Shh don't talk now." and again our lips met in a hot wet kiss. After long
minutes we reluctantly broke the kiss. Breathing with difficulty Logan
asked me:
"Are you gonna stay with us?"
OHH MAN! Now is no time for second thoughts!
"Yeah" I smiled and nodded.
"And ever and ev...-"he cut me with another deep kiss!
Sweet Jesus I could spend my time kissing this man.
"I'm a very happy man" a kiss "and a lucky one too" another kiss "thanks to
you darlin´" another one, and then he hugged me so tightly and I thought I
was in a dream.

5 years have passed. John can't stop growing. He's a beautiful boy. I can
already tell he's gonna be like his father someday, a heartthrob.
I'm a happy woman, even though Logan proposed me a year ago we haven't
marry yet...but I think its time.
"Yeah darling?"
"You think it's time to get married?"
"Right now?"
"Yeah why not?"
"You mean it Marie?"
"Absolutely sugah"
Grabbing his keys and our son we went out searching for a priest or a
judge, we didn't have time for a wedding chapel and maids of honour
(although that is what I wanted...but I'm OK with our decision), 6 hours
later we were in the house again...
"Yeah sugah?"
"You think John needs a sister?"
"Right NOW?"
"Yeah right now?"
"Well, we can try..."
And carrying me to be we started our task.
Now I do believe in fate and in God...and angels.