Warnings/notes : Bakura/Ryou, slightly silly, dialogue-only fic, hints at sex.

Disclaimer : I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh. This ficlet is part of 'Bumperstickers turned YGO' meaning it's based on a saying found on digitalbumperstickers.com.

written at 14th december 2003, by Misura, partially also for the 400-words dialogue-only challenge at the 400words lj-community.

Note : Ryou adresses Bakura as 'yami'.


"Gee, I'd like to care, but I don't possess that gene."

- digitalbumperstickers.com


"Something's bothering you."

"It's nothing."

"Tell me."

"It's nothing, I said."

"Well, and I said you should tell me."

"You wouldn't understand."

" .... "

"You wouldn't. Believe me."

"Try me."

"Let it be."

"All right. If you don't trust me ... "

"Yami ... "

"Ryou ... "

"It's not a matter of trust."

"Sure, Ryou. Whatever you say, Ryou."

" .... "

"Would you like some more tea, Ryou?"

"Stop that!"


"You know what!"

"Oh. I see. Sorry."

"Yami ... "

"You could just say you wanted to have sex you know."

"I beg your pardon?"

"Well, it's obvious. You don't want to talk, so you want me to drag you back to bed and ravish you."

"That's - "

"Of course, we don't *have* to get back to your bedroom."

"Yami ... "


"S-stop doing that right now!"

"Aww, but you like it!"

"I'm not in the mood."

"I bet I can fix that."


"Oooh, my little kitten wants to play hard to get!"

"Bugger off, yami."

" .... "

"I mean it."

"You're no fun at all."

" .... "

"So, what's bothering you?"

"We've been there already. Let's not go there again."

"I want an answer!"

"Too bad."

"I *demand* an answer!"

"Ooh, now I'm getting scared."

"A reply right now or no sex for a week!"

"That'd hurt you more than it would me."

"Awww, come on, Ryou!"

" .... "

"Don't you have a heart?"

"Excuse me? What does that have to do with this?"

"Well, if you won't tell me, then I'll have to make good on my threat. And, as you pointed out, that would be really bad for me. You wouldn't want to have me suffering like that, would you?"

"It's your decision."

"Oh? Really? Us having sex is solely *my* decision?"

"I didn't mean it like that."

"It sure *sounded* like that though."

" .... "

"And it's true too. I *always* have to take the initiative."

" ... That's not true."

"Yes, it is. You can't even say the word 'sex' without stuttering and going all red."

" .... "

"You're blushing!"

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Am not not not!"

"Are too too too!"

" .... "

"All right, prove it. Say 'Yami, I want to have sex with you, right here, right now'."

"What?! No way!"


" ... Joey and Seto had another argument."


"You asked what was bothering me. Well, that's it."

" ... What's that to you? Those two morons fight all the time!"

"I *knew* you wouldn't understand."

"Ryou ... "

"No, I *do not* want to have sex with you right here, right now!"

" ... All right. I can live with that decision."

" .... "

"After all, we're in this relationship together. I respect your opinion."

" .... "

"No sex in the kitchen, fine."

"Yami ... "

"So ... race you to the bedroom?"