Betcha are surprised to see me back, eh? No? Oh well. So, I wrote this for no reason except that fact I haven't posted anything in too long, and I was feeling slightly insane… well, more insane than usual. Enjoy.
Summary: Splinter is trying to meditate, but it proves impossible with four teenage boys, and one just HAS to be a joker.
A loud noise erupted through the once quiet air of the Lair, making the oldest mutant open his eyes.
"MIKEY!" A voice roared, and small echoes of Raphael's voice rung about the place. Splinter didn't move from his position on his knees, and he didn't return to his meditation. "You blew up the microwave – AGAIN!"
The old rat blinked and closed his eyes, now knowing the source of the bang.
"Yeah – er, sorry about that!" Michelangelo's voice called back from the kitchen. There was a noise of footsteps as someone else joined him, and then the sound of the microwave door opening.
"Ugh, Mike – how many times have I told you not to leave metal in the microwave?" Donatello asked his younger brother.
"Metal? I didn't leave – oh . . ."
Donny gave a sigh. "As soon as we either lose, break or blow up our cutlery I'm gonna make sure we get plastic ones, so there's little chance of accidents."
Splinter gave a soft chuckle. He listened to his smartest son grumble about the condition the microwave was in now, and how he was going to fix it. Don then turned his tone towards Mikey.
"What exactly were you cooking?"
"I don't really know – but it looked good."
"Ugh, it's all over the place. Why weren't you keeping an eye on it?"
"I was, erm, doing something else . . ."
There was a paused before Donny asked carefully, "What?"
A small explosion ripped through the air from the dojo, and the gap of light under Splinter's door flashed brightly. At the same time came a startled yelp. Splinter heard Raphael, close by his door, mutter, "what the?"
Splinter was very slightly surprised to hear the yell from his oldest son. He heard Leonardo tear out of the dojo and storm into the kitchen.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Mikey could be heard backing away from his brother.
"What did you do, Mike?" Donny asked his brother.
Leonardo answered. "He replaced my candle with a firework!"
There was a muffled noise that sounded very much like Mikey had tried to stifle his laughter. It was drowned out by the growls from Leo.
"Hey – hey – be lucky it was only a small firework," Mike quickly said in a feeble voice, as though he was afraid he was going to be attacked by his older brother any second.
Splinter sighed. He had not managed to continue his meditation since the first bang. He inhaled slowly and deeply before trying once again.
His attempt was disturbed by a very startled cry from Raphael, who, it sounded like, had just opened his door. There had also been a slosh sound.
More muffled laughter from the prankster as three pairs of feet rushed over to Raph's car door. It seemed as soon as Mike had seen his brother he had burst out laughing.
"Oh you'll think it's funny when I force all this paint down your throat!"
Leo and Donny had unintentionally let out small snorts of laughter but they were caught quickly and controlled. Splinter could almost see the death glare Raph would surely be wearing.
"I knew pink would be your color!" Mikey said cheekily.
Raphael let out a roar of rage and two pairs of rapid footsteps told Splinter there was now a chase. Meanwhile he heard Donny giving a thoughtful 'hm' at the latest prank's mechanism. Splinter could only guess it had something to do with a bucket of pink paint over the doorway, and a trigger to pull it down when the door was opened. The rat shook his head.
"Raph!" A very surprised voice of Donny called out, making both running footsteps stop, and Splinter's ears pricked.
"What? What?" Raph said impatiently, returning to his room door. There was a short silence, and then, "What!?"
"Where the hell did you get all this marijuana!?"
Splinter opened his eyes and lifted his head.
"That's not mine! I'd never – "
But he cut himself short and gave Splinter the chance to hear Michelangelo laughing hard.
"Mike – where the hell did you get –" Donny asked his brother.
"It's fake, guys – I got it from this cool joke shop –"
There were groans from his three brothers as they traipsed into the living area, or in Raph's case the bathroom. Splinter did not believe Raph would walk away from Mikey's trick that easily.
Mikey was still calling after them about the joke shop. "Yeah, it's got tons – I even brought some fake dog – "
Another small explosion rocked the Lair, accompanied by the same bright lights as before, and Splinter rolled his eyes wearily under their lids. Mikey started sniggering, sounding remarkably like the cartoon dog Mutley.
"Whoa – Leo, you okay?" Donny asked.
From the sounds of it Leo had not moved, but Splinter was imagining an expression on his face much like Raphael's.
"Mikey," Leo growled under his breath, loud enough for his brother to hear.
"I think I'll just switch the lights on," Donny said wisely as his footsteps fell quieter as he moved away to the switch near the ladder.
"Damnit this paint won't come off!" Came a cry from the bathroom. A door was thrown open and the sound of running water reached Splinter's ears. Raph moved into the kitchen and caused some rustling, before returning to the bathroom and slamming the door shut. The old rat squeezed his eyes shut tighter and tried to concentrate on his mediation again.
The comforting feeling of his success waved over him and a peaceful smile crept onto his face. His eyelids relaxed and he opened his mind. It wasn't long before he was disturbed yet again by Michelangelo's voice and the noise of something whining and ripping.
"Raph what are you shoving down the garbage disposal – " Mikey's voice cut off for a second before – "Nooooo my panda!"
There was an insane cackle from Raphael and more cries of 'nooooo!' from the other turtle. Raph's cackle turned into a light splutter.
"Uck, ugh – fluff everywhere –"
" – aw damn, it's sticking to the paint –"
"Ugh, I'm going to my room," Leo announced as Mikey seemed to have started wrestling his teddy away from Raph. "Away from Mike and his pranks."
Splinter listened to Leonardo's movements as they headed towards his door. It slid shut after him before Donatello sudden called out, "Leo I wouldn't – !"
" – light any candles . . ." Donny finished.
Despite the tragic fate of his panda Mikey burst out laughing again. Splinter could only guess Leo was probably as black as coal.
"I don't think I want to go into my room," He heard Donatello say to himself in a scared tone.
Leo's door was thrown open and he stomped out and, as far as Splinter could tell, past the kitchen and past Mikey.
"That's it!" He growled. "I am going out!" There was a rustle of a trench coat as Leo threw it over his shoulder and pulled his arms through. Splinter's eyebrows rose very slightly at the silence that followed. "Hey, what the – ?" More rustling. "Hey what's - ?" Furious rustling. "Mikey! You've put itching powder in the coats!"
"Guilty!" Came the reply.
"Ggrghh! That – is – it!" Leo pulled off the coat and, by the sounds, flung it on the floor. He stamped down the steps. "Raph, remember those times I told you not to kill Mikey – well – why the hell are you listening to me – get him!"
"Aaagghhh!" Mikey yelled as he took off around the lair. Two pairs of feet followed him.
Splinter heard Donny whimper from the living area, as though afraid if he moved, some prank would fall on him.
"Splinteeeeerrrrr!" Mikey yelled, and the rat's eyes shot open as his door was wrenched wide. "Splinter – they're trying to kill me! Tell them!"
There were sudden enraged outbursts from Leo and Raph as they caught up with Mikey in Splinter's doorway.
"But he covered me in paint – !"
"He put fireworks where the candles should have been – !"
" – Put fake marijuana on my bed – !"
" – Three candles – !"
" – This paint won't even come off – !"
" – And itching powder – !"
Splinter watched his three sons. One was scratching furiously all over his body with large black areas over his face and plastron; one had faded but obvious pink paint splattered over his head and shoulders; and the third was clutching a decapitated stuffed panda.
"But look what Raph did to my panda!" Mikey whined, and waved his teddy bear at the rat.
"Fireworks – !"
"Paint – !"
"Enough!" Splinter called, and they fell silent, watching him. "Michelangelo, not only have you caused mayhem once again but you also disturbed my meditation. You will do all your brothers' chores including your own for a week, and you will dispose of the joke items on Raphael's bed. You will rid the coats of itching power and I forbid you to buy any more fireworks that look like candles. Raphael, you will buy Michelangelo a new toy or else stitch his old one back up – you should not have retaliated," he added seeing Raph about to protest. "Leonardo, you will miss two days of practice for issuing an order to kill your brother – " Leo's mouth fell open in shock " – and Donatello," he said as the forth brother appeared behind the others. " . . . You may do as you like until Michelangelo's punishment is through, a reward for not involving yourself."
There was a small paused before Raph said, "yeah well he didn't get paint thrown over him."
"Or have candles blown up in your face," Leo added.
Splinter raised a hand sharply to signal silence. "Now, if you don't mind, I would like return to my meditation. And now my candle has burned out."
He pulled a box of matches from behind him, struck a match and turned to new candle.
"No Splinter don't – !" Mikey yelled as he leapt forward.
Heheh, I had fun. *evil smirk *