Why You Shouldn't Seduce Your Boss Chapter One. By EternalSenshi. I don't own SM. Please R&R. I guess something like this can get you fired...

It's really quite simple.

You go to college. You need money. You apply for a job. You get a job. You get money. You pay off tuition and food.

It's simple. Unless you're me.

Yes, I go to college. I'm a college sophomore. I definitely need money. I've got a good job -- I'm an intern at an architectural company, and in that internship, I'm a secretary. I've got a very, very generous paycheck, and I can pay off my tuition AND buy as much food as I want.

The job isn't the problem -- it's my boss. I've never met him.

He has demands, all right. 'Get my coffee', 'Grab my lunch', 'Get the tax return from so and so...', although I've had to do these things, I've never laid eyes on Mamoru Chiba.

Which may have been a good thing. He could be so seriously deformed that he'd think I'd run off if I saw him. I wouldn't. It was too good of a job, and I needed the money. Plus, I'm not really into affairs and stuff. My roommate, Naru, loves watching documentaries on the Lifetime Channel -- supposedly the channel for women, but in my opinion, the channel to see women being beaten up -- then becoming paranoid that the first person she has sex with will come after her with a shovel and kill her, or whatever. Besides, seeing the boss didn't matter a whole lot, did it?

Apparently it did. It turns out that every new secretary never gets to see him. Kind of like a test. He'd talk to them through a machine voice, you had to pass him his things through a slot, and you could never bring his visitors and clients straight to him. The other workers were gossiping about it over break.

"She'll crack soon. All the others did. It was like they were talking to themselves." one of them said. The others laughed.

Well, I was going to show them. Usagi Tsukino doesn't give up that easily.


Rei was furious. "If I had a boss like that, I'd make him show himself, or I'd quit!"

"Does it really matter?" I asked, pulling out my lunch.

"Yes!" Rei nearly screamed. "Usagi, he's taking advantage of you! That's all you are, a doormat."

"Am not!" I cried.

"It shouldn't affect anything." Ami said. "I mean, if you're getting a decent paycheck-"

I let out a laugh. "Decent? Way more, Ami."

"Then seeing the boss isn't important. Maybe he likes his solitude, or doesn't want to be sued for sexual harassment."

"You know all the things on TV and in the papers with married bosses having affairs with their secretaries. Some secretaries even had their boss's babies. There was a movie last night that showed-"

"Thank you, Miss Safety Conscious." I cut Naru off, saluting. "Don't worry, I'm still a virgin."

"Even going out with Asanuma?" Rei asked, surprised.

I glared at her. "Thank you, but that chapter in my life is over."

"When did you dump him?" Ami and Naru asked at the same time.

"Two nights ago." I said. "I'm not interested in sex, and he knows it. Or at least, he should. He got to demanding. So, I told him it was over."

"Aah." Ami said.

"Good for you! There was a movie last week on Lifetime-" Naru started.

"Honestly, Naru, those movies aren't real! You, Usagi and Ami are never going to get laid!" Rei said angrily.

"Oh, so you and Yuichiro have had your little 'love-making' session?" I snapped.

"We've been talking about it. Which is a lot further than the rest of you."

"So why haven't you done it yet? Scared? Or maybe you're not such 'hot stuff'." I said.

"You're just jealous, bitch."



"Look who's talking!"

"ENOUGH!" Ami cried, closing her math binder. "Will you two stop sniping?"

"No." Rei and I said at the same time.

"Anyway, Usagi, if you want to keep the job, don't worry about the boss." Ami said simply. "Use that energy for the test tomorrow."

Naru groaned. "Don't remind me."

"You've got to admit I'm not as tied as Ami, and I'm not paranoid like Naru." I said, hitting Naru lightly. "At least I have a life." I said, biting into a cookie.

"Are you going to the party tonight?" Naru asked.

"Nope. I've got my own party to attend. A classy party. One where no one gets drunk and you have to step over couples having sex and giving blow jobs on the floor. I've even got a new dress for it."

"See? No life." Rei said, sitting back in her chair.

"Oh, just go give Yuichiro a blow job if you want to prove you have the more exciting life." I snapped.

Don't get me wrong -- I love Rei to death. But that's the thing -- I love her TO DEATH.

"Hey, if this soiree is for your company, then you might finally meet your boss." Naru said.

"He could be dashingly handsome." Ami said.

"Dashingly handsome, and not to mention rich." Naru said dreamily.

"Or, we could live in reality. If he's like that, A- he's too old. B- he's already taken. C- he'd use Usagi for sex, which she is not interested in, or D- he wouldn't be interested in a nineteen year old college student. That's the truth. Life is no fairy tail, ladies." Rei said.

"I have to agree with Rei." I said, crumpling up my lunch bag. "It's no big deal. I'm single, I'm sexy, and I'm out to have a good time. I don't need to follow someone I've never met. And when I'm ready for sex, I'll know."

"You are going to be a virgin for life." Rei said, pulling back her long black hair.

"Listen, Asanuma just wasn't the one. Yuichiro may be the one for you, but Asanuma wanted too much. I want seduction first, sex later. Not the other way around.

"I hope you find someone at your ball tonight, Cinderella." Rei said, rolling her eyes.

"I want to go to a ball like yours, Usagi." Ami said dreamily.

"We could host one." Naru suggested.

Ami and I looked at each other, and we attacked her with hugs. "You're a genius!" Ami and I cried.

Rei shrugged. "Okay. That sounds cool."

I threw my crumpled bag at her. "Stop acting like a snob and be excited!" I said.

Rei smiled. "Okay, I want one too." She turned serious again. "It's going to be a lot of work."

"Then cut sex out of your life. I'm sure Yuichiro will understand." I said.

Her backpack made contact with my head.


This was SOPHISTICATED. There were no couples having sex in any of the potted plants, there were no girls giving guys blow jobs, no one was drunk, there was no loud music hurting my ears. There was some decorative piano music, quiet conversations, and all that were in the potted plants were the plants.

The only thing missing were the people to talk to.

Some guy drinking champagne caught my eye. He eyed the dress I was wearing -- black silk with a high neck and no sleeves, the open back tied up with strings -- and smiled. He had hair as dark as the dress, and his smile curved his perfectly pink lips. He looked as if he weren't really paying attention to what his group was saying (I, for one, didn't understand what they were talking about). He started walking towards me.

As soon as he did, it seemed as if time had stopped, and only the two of us were moving. My heart was beating so fast-

And then time started moving again. He was standing next to me at the bar.

"Champagne, please." he said. His voice was deep and gentle, with a hint of self assuredness.

"Me too, please." I said.

He looked at me. "Aren't you a little young?"

"To be here, or to drink?"


"I work here."

"The hotel? Well, thanks for crashing this party. You're the only woman who looks like a woman, not a woman trying to be a man."

"Well, thank you, but I don't work at the hotel. I work in this company."

"You do, huh?"

"I do."

"Are you new? Because I haven't seen you here before."

"Sort of. I'm the new secretary. I'm actually an intern, but because no one wanted the job, the intern got it. One of those desperate circumstances."

He nodded. His blue eyes sparkled as if he were laughing on the inside, but he didn't want to show it to me. "So, how's the boss?"

"I wouldn't know." I said. "Never met him."


"Yup." I took my champagne from the bartender, and looked back at my new acquaintance. "You must have met him. Is he a nice guy?"

"No." he said. "Horrible person. I'm just his best friend."

"Oh." I said, smiling. "He has a lot of orders."

He swallowed his sip of champagne. "Yes, sounds a lot like him."

I nodded. "He has a nice voice. I think."

"You think?"

"I've never heard it."

He looked amused. "Oh."

"So, do you have a name, Mickey Blue Eyes?" I asked.

He shook his head. "No, no names. That's when it becomes business and paperwork, and boring. I don't want a pretty girl like you boring me."

I laughed. "I don't think I could bore you. I think you'd be boring me."

"You find me boring?" he asked.

"I find your friends boring." I said. "I don't find you boring yet."

"I'm glad to hear that." he said, smiling.

I smiled back, when a waiter came around and offered me an hors duerve. I took it and popped it in my mouth, and chewed. And chewed. And chewed. "What is this?" I asked.

The guy started laughing. "Your face...!" he managed to gasp out.

"Bleah!" I said with the disgusting thing in my mouth.

"I didn't know you were such a big fan of snails." he said, still laughing.

I froze. There was a slug in my mouth. This scene was so cliche'd.

"Excuse me sir, these aren't escargot. These were the chicken livers. I'm afraid they were a little overcooked." The waiter said.

"Oh, ew!" I squealed. I suddenly didn't feel so well. My stomach was churning uncomfortably.

He kept laughing. "Are you okay?"

Did I fucking look okay? No, I didn't. I had an overcooked chicken liver in my mouth, the most gorgeous guy I'd ever seen was laughing at me, and-

"Watch it!" I cried. He stopped laughing, but didn't move. Which he should have.

So, I threw up my chicken liver, and other assorted foods on the guy I was chatting with.

"Oh, shit!" he cried. Everyone fell silent and looked at me -- holding my hair back as I looked at the ground, my mouth open and my champagne all over the floor -- and the guy -- looking disgustedly at me, his stained shirt showing the remains of my breakfast, lunch and dinner, plus chicken liver (sitting calmly on his shoe).

"Um..." I squeaked hoarsely.

He looked at me, his nose scrunched in disgust.

"You know, I think I might just want to go." I said quietly.

"You stupid bitch!" some girl cried, hitting me. "Do you realize who you threw up on?"

I looked at the girl bewilderedly, then back at the guy, then the girl again. "Um...no."

Everyone started muttering. I looked around, worried, then looked back at him.

"I'm your boss -- Mamoru Chiba." he said, looking at me disgustedly and sounding furious.

My eyes widened in shock. This definitely meant I was fired.

"I'm sorry." I whispered. I quickly turned and looked at everyone, then back at him. "I'm sorry." I whispered again. I ran away from the staring and gossiping crowd, grabbed my coat, and ran out the door, not looking back.


"You can't blame yourself." Naru said, comfortingly.

I folded my arms around myself, and tightened my sash around my pink bathrobe. I bit my lip. "Yeah, right."

"Who knew that you can't eat chicken liver? Especially overcooked -- that could make anyone sick." Naru said. "He can't fire you because you threw up on him."

I laughed a short, hollow laugh. "Yes he could. He owns the whole fucking company." I brushed back a strand of my long blonde hair. "I might as well clean out my desk tomorrow."

The phone rang. I jumped slightly and turned my head. "You answer it. I'm going to visit Rei. Maybe she can help."

"What if it's for you?" Naru asked.

"Take a message." I said dejectedly. I walked down the hall, zoning out. I was out of a job because I'd thrown up on the boss. The look on his face was all I could see in front of me. I wondered if the call Naru had to take was my call from Mr. Chiba, reminding me that I was fired. I knocked on Rei's door, then let myself in. My eyes opened wide, and I shut the door.

During my time of crisis, during my time of agony and now finding myself broke -- how the hell was I supposed to know that tonight was the night Rei decided to get fucked by Yuichiro?

Although, I should have remembered. I basically dared her to do it at lunch. Rei's not one to take dares lightly.

"Usagi!" Ami called from the stairs, tearing me out of my thoughts. Still, I was still scarred by the little 'sex show' I'd just witnessed. "Hey, how was it?"

"Oh, Ami, it was horrible!" I cried. "Where have you been?"

"Library. Finished the paper due in English."

"Ami, we have three weeks for that." I said, amazed. I've know Ami since high school, and I still can't get over how smart she is. "How long have you been there anyway?"

"Ever since Rei and Yuichiro kicked me out, and Rei had her first sexual experience."

"How long ago was that?"

"Three hours ago."

"I thought it was only a ten minute thing!"

Ami's eyes widened. "They're still going? Aren't they exhausted?!"

Rei came out and shut the door behind her. She was holding the collar of her short maroon terrycloth bathrobe over her. "What is it, Usagi?" she asked, sounding out of breath and angry.

"How can you two still keep having sex?" Ami cried, exasperated. "I should head back to the library.

"Oh, Rei, I met him!" I cried.

"I could finish that project in trig,"

"Met who?" Rei asked.

"Then there's the history test,"

"The boss! I met him, and I'm fired!"

"Ami, you know the material back and forth." Rei said.

"I threw up on him!"

"What?!" Rei and Ami said, looking at me.

Yuichiro opened the door, dressed. "I'm going to-"

"Stay out of this!" we cried. He went back inside hurriedly.

Rei quickly studied the expression on my face. She put her arm on my shoulder, and helped walk me back to my room. Naru sat them, waiting with the phone in her lap.

"Usagi, I..." she trailed off when she saw that I was almost in tears again. All three of them sat me down and waited for me to explain.

"Maybe you're allergic." Ami suggested after I'd finished.

"No, Ami, remember last week's chicken buffet? Usagi ate them all out -- in one day she'd finished a week long buffet." Naru said

"But she could be allergic to the liver. They didn't serve it. Plus, it was undercooked." Ami turned to me. "But whether she is or not -- Usagi, it's not your fault."

Only Rei stayed silent. Finally, she said, "Naru, why are you holding the phone? Waiting for the shovel murderer?"

"Oh! That, yeah, Usagi? He called when you went to see Rei."

"Great!" I cried. "What did he say? Did he fire me? Sue me?"

"You don't sue someone for a little barf." Ami said.

"Usagi, he didn't fire you. He said he's-" Naru said.

"What do you want?" Rei cut off Naru, glaring at the doorframe.

The rest of us looked up at the door. Enter my ex-boyfriend, an asshole since day one. Why we went out for six months, I'll never know. I quickly turned away from his face. "Get the fuck out of here, Asanuma." I said quickly.

"Can't we just talk, Usagi?" Asanuma said. His voice sounded slightly slurred.

"Fuck no." I said.

"I need to talk to you. It's important." he insisted.

Rei, Ami and Naru looked at me. I didn't want to talk to him. I didn't have to. But then again, if it would make him leave me alone, then I might as well just listen to my mom -- sit still and let him get it over with. This happens to work with everything. So, I nodded. Naru and Ami looked at me sympathetically, then walked out of the room.

Rei stared at me, and mouthed 'I'll be right outside', and got up to walk out of the room. She glared at Asanuma, who was eyeing her up and down, his eyes clouded in lust. Rei looked ready to smack him, which I didn't quite understand, being as how Asanuma was a friend of hers.

Asanuma closed the door after Rei stepped out. He stared at me, in a way that made me uncomfortable to be in a bathrobe. "Where were you all evening?" he asked. He'd been drinking. Heavily.

"Why the fuck do you care?"

"You were parading around, weren't ya?" he said. "Like a wh-wh-whore!" He was piss drunk.

"Asanuma...no. No! Get the fuck out of here!" I cried, pulling my bathrobe tightly around myself.

"You don't want to be a virgin anymore, do ya?" he said. "Let me help you with that."

"GET THE FUCK OUT!!" I screamed.

He pushed me down on my bed, a deep lust filling his eyes, making them grow dark. "Come on, Usagi!" he said. He was so wasted, he probably hadn't even heard me. He positioned himself uncomfortably on top of me, holding down my arms.

"Get off! GET OFF!!" I screamed, trying to free my arms and legs. He bent down and started kissing me, and bit me hard on my lower lip. I screamed.

"You know you want it." he said.

"Usagi! USAGI!" I heard my friends cry. They seemed so far away from here.

Asanuma was holding down my arms with one hand, and with the other he was unzipping his pants. I kept struggling, not wanting him to win. It was like I was having convulsions with all the movement. Finally, Asanuma got sick of my movement, and slapped me across the face. I screamed louder.

Asanuma had his pants down, and moved my bathrobe, ready to force himself into me. There was nothing I could do except to keep thrashing. I was getting tired of struggling to keep him away. I screamed as he tried to force my legs apart so he could fuck me -- no, rape me.

I was actually praying for the first time in my life.

I felt Asanuma's uncomfortable weight being lifted off of me. I opened my eyes a crack, but they were blurred by the tears that had leaked out. If that was all there was to it, then the shame hurt more than losing my virginity. I looked closer, and saw a guy in a tuxedo punching Asanuma.

Oh. So I still hadn't lost it.

"Usagi! I tried-!" Naru cried. All three of them cried when they saw the blood gushing from Asanuma's nose. I heard a fist hit skin, and saw Asanuma's body crumple to the ground.

This would have been romantic, except that I had been this close to losing my virginity, my lip was bleeding painfully, and the person who'd saved me was--

Mamoru Chiba.

My friends stood in the hallway, staring on at our scene. All that was running through my head was 'What the fuck is Mr. Chiba doing in my room?'

I quickly covered my body up as he turned to me. "College," he said, shaking his head as if this happened in college every day. "Are you okay?" he asked me.

I nodded, still shaking.

He turned to my friends. "You guys can come in. It's okay."

Ami and Naru walked in, shooting Mr. Chiba wary looks. Rei looked at the unconscious Asanuma, and then walked over to me. "Are you okay?" she asked.

I couldn't say anything. She touched my cheek where Asanuma had hit me, and I felt a sharp tension in my cheek. I exhaled in a hiss of pain.

"Oh! Sorry!" Rei said. She looked at Mr. Chiba. "Can you go get some ice?"

He nodded. "Where?"

"End of the hall." Rei said. He left the room, and Rei looked back at me. "Usagi, I'm sorry."

"He was fucking tanked." I said bitterly.

Naru and Ami nodded. "He was drowning his sorrows earlier." Ami said.

Mr. Chiba came back, holding a handkerchief. "There's ice inside," he said.

"Thanks." Rei said for me, and she made me hold it at my cheek. The sudden burst of coldness actually felt really good for my stinging cheek. There was a long silence.

"Listen, Miss Tsukino, you're obviously not feeling well." Mr. Chiba said. "I'll just have you come to my office tomorrow at work, and we'll discuss things then."

I nodded. "Yes, sir." I mumbled.

He picked up Asanuma, threw him out in the hall, then closed the door behind him.

Naru looked at me. "Handsome!"

Ami's eyes sparkled. "Handsome and rich!"

"I don't want to talk about it." I said.

Rei looked at me. "Are you sure you're okay?"

I nodded. "I'm just seeing stars." I said. There were bruises on my body, and a cut on my lip. My cheek was stinging like hell. "You guys go ahead. I'm going to get some sleep. See you tomorrow."

Rei stood up. "Are you sure?"

"Yuichiro's probably waiting for you." I said. "I don't want you to miss out because of me."

Rei nodded. "All right." She picked Ami up by the arm, and they walked to the door. "Get some rest." Rei said softly.

"We'll be down the hall if you need us." Ami said.

They quietly closed the door, leaving me and Naru alone. She looked at me sympathetically. "Get some sleep, Usagi." she said.

I nodded. Sleeping was a good idea. Maybe I could think of something else. I changed into my pjs, and put on my headphones, listening to the happy sound of Komatsu Ayaka singing 'C'est La Vie'

I've never slept so fretfully in my life.


Rei, Ami, Naru and I sat down at breakfast, discussing things to keep our minds off of last night. Asanuma passed by our table. "Hey, Rei." His nose and an area around it were completely purple and bruised.

She glared at him. "What now?"

"Just wanted to say hi." he said. He walked over and sat at another table, sitting next to Keiko Yonda.

"He's going out with Keiko now?" Naru informed us.

"Good for him." I said.

"Does he even remember last night?" Ami asked.

"I'm surprised he doesn't even have a hangover." I said.

"Maybe your boss knocked out his last remaining brain cell." Naru said.

Rei looked at me. "How did he know where you live?"

I shrugged. "You need to write down contact information and stuff for health, payroll, insurance, stuff the company needs. Probably got it from there."

"Are you ready to talk to him?" Rei asked.

"Nope." I said, polishing off my bacon. "Have to, though."

"Maybe you're not fired." Ami said.

"Perhaps." I said. All I could do was wait, and watch Asanuma suckle Keiko's neck at the next table.


I hope you all enjoy the first chapter. I know it's long...they're all long...well, more enjoyable reading. Love you all!
*~*EternalSenshi*~* P.S. Please R&R.