Hamha all, and welcome to commercial spoofs with the hamhams! (This story was inspired by a fanfic called Harry Potter commercial spoofs that I read.)

To the old readers of this fanfic, this here is the new and improved version. The content's still the same, the only differences now are that this fanfic is now properly spell-checked, no more sloppy spelling mistakes, and not so many friggin' CAPS and exclamation marks like I did in the original format of this. (Geez, what was I? Hopped up on a bunch of sugar or something back then while writing this fanfic? …Actually, most likely I sadly was.) Now without further ado, here is the new and improved hamham commercial spoofs! Hope you enjoy them!

Disclaimer: I don't own Hamtaro, band-aids, Herbal Essences, or Hooked On Phonics.

Band-Aid commercial

Hamtaro is seen running along. Laughing and giggling when he suddenly trips and falls, scraping his arm

Hamtaro: Whaaaa!

Bijou: (in a gushy voice) Oh-no! Did you hurt yourself sweetie? Come here baby! I will fix you up!

Bijou takes out a band-aid and sticks it on Hamtaro's arm

Hamtaro: (singing) I'm stuck to my band-aids, cause my band aids are stuck on me!

Ha ha! That was lame...okay, next one!

Hooked on Phonics

Maxwell: Hooked on Phonics is proven to improve your child's reading! Just see how much this little child has improved here.

Cappy is seen reading an alphabet book and singing the alphabet.

Cappy: A B C X 1 2 3, 6 9 10 Z, dog cat mouse rock fish! Q R frog, T you me, 9 5 stick, uuhh...something something something! Now I know my A23's, next time won't you sing-

Maxwell quickly shoves Cappy away in a closet and locks it.

Maxwell: That's right! Hooked on Phonics really works! Now why don't we check out this other wonderful student here?

Maxwell shows Hamtaro sitting at a desk, writing on a piece of paper. Hamtaro grins and holds up the paper to the screen, reading: "Hoocked on fonix rilly werks 4 me!!"

Maxwell quickly crumples paper and pulls a curtain down in front of Hamtaro.

Maxwell: Get Hooked on Phonics now! Call 999- 999-999999-99999-9999-999-999999-9999-9. Call today and see the improvements on your child's reading!

Herbal Essences Commercial

Pashmina: Are you sure this won't damage my scarf in anyway whatsoever?

Director: Yes miss Pashmina, we are certain. Now it really is time to do the commercial! Places everyone! Now, 1-2-3! Action!

Pashmina: Oh yes! I've got the urge!

Dexter & Howdy: (singing) She's got the urge!

Pashmina: Herbal essences cleans your fur to make it from dull and full of split ends, to full and bouncing volume!

Howdy and Dexter put Shampoo in her fur

Pashmina: Oh yes! YES!

Pashmina washes off shampoo.

Pashmina: Oh-no! NO!

Pashmina looks down at her scarf.

Pashmina: It s-shrunk! Ack! I'm suffocating!

Pashmina's face turns blue and she falls on the floor, twitching.

Dexter: Do you think now is a good time to call the paramedics?

Howdy: (still singing) She's got the urge!

Sorry if that was lame. I'll try to cook up some more ideas soon...cooking…hey! That gives me an idea! Next chapter, cooking! What horrors await? Please review! If you have any commercial ideas, please tell me!