Title:When Love and Death Embrace
Rating:PG-13 (it's more sad than violent, I think)
Main characters:Lucius, Severus and Voldemort
I'm just a poor student, don't sue me, I don't know much, they all belong to JKR . . .
Severus is captured by Lord Voldemort after Lucius had given out his secret (Snape being the spy) and punished. This is going to be short, only 2 or 3 chapters, I'm not sure yet, I have another story to write (Venomous) as well as my thesis, but somehow this story jumped into my mind and I won't be at peace before writing it down. A warning: implied slash, but nothing graphic, and character death! Hope you'll like it. Review, please.
When Love and Death Embrace
Is it night or is it day? Who can tell the difference in this gloomy, dark place? I can't remember the last time I've seen the rays of sun, heard birds singing and walked freely among people. And yet it wasn't that far away in the past, only now it seems an altogether foreign time, not my time and life. Was it indeed me who several days ago roamed the quiet corridors of Hogwarts in search of students out of bed? This place is as dark as my soul; it's a place of fear, tears and death, my death. The earth is cold against my cheek and to move my hand require an unbelievable effort. I can barely hold onto consciousness after the long days of torture. Curses and physical abuse, all at once, whole my body hurts, but my mind remained intact.
The heavy door creeps open and through it a shimmering silver light comes. So it's night, that has to be the moonlight. Steps echo around the moist walls and I know, feel, that the hall is being filled with Death Eaters. I'm unable to think about what hurts me more – my body or my heart.
I suffered at his hands and now he kneels down to me, lifting my head slightly as he pours a potion down my throat. A potion to keep me conscious and sane, my own invention, how ironic! For a brief moment our eyes meet and I'm drowning in the steely grey seas full of disappointment. How harsh your eyes are, Lucius! How unforgiving and forgetting! I believed you would never give me over to the Dark Lord, I believed there's still something human left in you, I believed I was important to you. My fate was sealed the day I went to Dumbledore, but I wouldn't have thought that you'd be my end.
My lost Lucius, my friend, my soul mate, my doom. He leaves me to join the Death Eaters and the Dark Lord, leaving me to feel lonely and cold. Severus, Severus, how could you think that he would value you more than his master? A Malfoy never lets his feelings rule him. A Malfoy is always rational, loyal to old traditions and beliefs. A Malfoy never acts upon his emotions.
Someone yanks my hair and I find myself looking into the dreadful eyes of my former master. They're full of unbearable sadness as he says nothing, but bends his head to my face. His soft breath caresses my skin and his fingers brush my cheek lightly. I'm almost crying at his gentleness, why is it so? I've failed him and the others; I've failed everyone. I haven't been a good Death Eater, I haven't been a good double-agent, I've failed Dumbledore and the Order, I've failed the Dark Lord, I haven't been a good teacher, a good son, a good man. He kisses my forehead lightly, a feathery touch at which my heart bleeds. His lips brush mine and then he kisses me, firmly and possessively. I'm his. In the corner of my eyes I see Lucius flinch. The kiss, my last but one, lasts long, marking me as his, binding me.
I shudder when he ends it and sits on his throne, creating a magical Patronus-like, silvery shield around himself and his faithful followers. Its silver glimmer bestows an unearthly, angelic countenance upon Lucius. He's cold and firm, never wavering in his loyalty.
A Dementor slides to me, lifting me from the floor by my shoulders as if I were just a helpless rag doll, he pushes me to the wall with his body. The horrid, inhuman hand strokes my hair, plays with its dark strands as a lover would. Painfully slowly it moves down my cold cheek, scratching it with a long nail and I cry out quietly. Lucius didn't even flinch. I feel a lone tear mingle with drops of my blood. I start to tremble as a thought occurs to me – I deserve this. For a moment Dumbledore's loving face flickers in my mind, but the picture is taken away from me, sucked up by the dark creature holding me. I deserve this.
The Dementor rips open my robe under which I wear nothing but black trousers and his nails claw at my chest savagely. A pained, frightened moan escapes my mouth, as I don't have the strength to scream. I'm astonished when Lucius retreats slightly. Is he nervous? Are you having second thoughts, Lu? Something akin to laughter comes from the Dementor as he takes a deep breath. A suffocating coldness envelops me as my heart almost stops and tears run freely down my cheeks. I can't stop them, I'm crying silently, without a sound, shivering in this coldness and darkness. Lucius closes his eyes.
But this is not yet the end; this Dementor wants to play. His chilly thumb is on my lips, brushing them, taking away the lingering taste of the Dark Lord. His body is still pressed against mine, supporting me against the wall. I would fall without it, so weak I feel. The Dark Lord whispers something to Lucius whose eyes fly open. Why this show? Is it for him?
The Dementor steps back and I waver, losing the support. Involuntarily I reach out to him and the Dark Lord laughs as I collapse against the dark creature, into his deadly embrace. Lucius claps a shaking hand over his mouth, his grey eyes pale and wide. I'm pushed back into the wall and the Dementor bends his hooded head. I expect the Kiss, but instead his disgusting lipless mouth sucks itself onto my chest, over my heart. This time I scream as all I thought nice and good is sucked away from me so brutally it hurts. Lucius starts crying. What are you doing, Lu? Sobs are shaking his body as he embraces himself. Don't cry, this is what you wanted – an amazing example of loyalty. Do you know I used to love you? You've always meant more to me than I to you.
The mouth has moved to my neck, my lips tremble, my tears are cold like death itself. The Kiss for the traitor, for the one who failed everyone, for the one who deserves it. The Dementor embraces me, sucking at my neck and stroking my hair. 'No, no . . .' sobs Lucius. Goyle grabs him roughly; he'll leave bruises on his tender skin. Dark Lord's face has transformed from amusement to anger as Lucius reaches out his hand . . . to me.
The immense pain is clouding my vision, I can feel sharp teeth scratch my neck and I groan. This hurts. The Dementor spreads my arms, takes a deep breath and all my sins come to haunt me – my victims, my failures, my weaknesses . . .
I bit my lips, tasting the salty tears as the cold breath reaches my mouth. Lucius falls to the ground.
The mouth is on my lips and I shudder when they're parted, my eyes close.
The sharp teeth and slippery tongue toys with my lower lip, then close over my mouth.
The last tear slips from my eyes.
My hands fall . . .
Lucius screams . . .