Summary: Short fic, Malcolm thinking.
This is my first ever
Enterprise fic -it's very short, but I'm just
experimenting with the characters right now – I might do something
longer (have a story in mind) but want to see if I can get a feel for
writing Malcolm before I attempt anything longer. Any feedback would be really
They are too different, he thinks, to have anything in common. She is as fluid as the air around her, as vibrant as the stars she is named for - a builder of bridges.
He is as tense as suspension wire, ready to snap at any moment, with any provocation. He doubts that any light dwells within him. He is good at destroying things.
She is trying to build a foundation in his life. With her words, her glances, her shy smiles and soft voice, she is becoming important to him. She is creating a place for herself in his world, and he doesn't know what to do about it.
He doesn't know how to build relationships - he only knows how to destroy them. He doesn't know how to nurture hearts, he only knows how to break them. And he doesn't know how to love.
He thinks that maybe, once upon a time, he did. When he was younger, and longed for his father's approval. When he tried so hard to follow the rules, and be exactly what his family wanted him to be - that's when he believed in love. But he doesn't believe in it anymore. He's never had any one love him in his life, except for maybe Madeleine, and even there he's not sure.
Can he be blamed for not understanding, then, what Hoshi wants from him? What she sees in him? He was broken by his parents disregard long ago, and has learned his lessons well.
He wonders what she sees when she looks at him, studying him with her
deep-almond eyes. He doesn't think she sees the emptiness in him. Or maybe she does, and thinks she can create something where his heart used to be.
He finds himself wishing she would try.