Disclaimer: SDK does not belong to me, blah blah, ya know the drill.

Rating: R/NC-17

Status: Complete

Type: One-shot fic

Completed: 17/6/03

A/N ^_^ This is a Samurai Deeper KYO one-shot that's based on how Kyo may perceive Yuya, XD and maybe, just maybe his real feelings for her. Seriously, you can see that he does actually give a damn about her, considering how he always keeps saving her from getting killed and everything. Lol, and any fool can see that Yuya has difficulty choosing between Kyo and Kyoshirou (ouch! Lol, 2 people in one body…hmm…and one's using it, the other one's always watching o_O yesh, funny thoughts, uhuh.) Anyway, let's get onto the fic, and everything here is Kyo's POV; may be a bit OOC. Oh, um, and it kinda jumps around from the manga to the anime and back and forth and stuff. Sorry if you get confused! Hehe, rated R for language and NC-17 for sexual themes/instances! XD Mwahahah…lol, first SDK fic and first lemony thing.

Her refers to Sakuya, while him refers to Kyoshirou. And 'you'? Oh, it's pretty easy to guess! XD Who else could it be? Lol.



I couldn't believe how much you acted like her when I first saw you from behind his eyes. You looked nothing close to her; your eyes were an ethereal green, her eyes were a deep brown; your long blonde locks were always held back in a hair tie, her's were always let loose down her shoulders and they were black as midnight. Your temperaments couldn't have been more different as the sun and the moon either. Where she was always quiet and slightly broody, you were always boisterous, happy, feisty, and so full of life. As I said, both of you couldn't have been more different.

Still, both of you shared two things in common, no matter how different you were.

For one thing, under it all, I perceived that both of you shared the same type of strength. The type of strength that maybe, couldn't be seen on the surface, but was surely lying hidden beneath it all. She had it, and you did too. The numerous times that you always stood up to me; you were so different from all those other girls. Any other girl would have begged for her life, and if you had been the same, I wouldn't have hesitated to kill you. But the strength you had, attracted me, aroused me even; and I just couldn't help but continue to watch you through his eyes. Ah yes, I remember it well; that very first time that I broke out from his body and killed right in front of your eyes. And you ran from me, and was promptly trapped against that tree. Then I asked you to beg for your life, and maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't take it.

You of course surprised me by head-butting my chin to no end. Your very strength puzzled me, and yes, aroused me. Which was why I had to see your body next. You would not believe how very amusing it was to see you turn red and blush right through the roots of your hair, and the feel of your skin just made me want to take you right there and then. Kami-sama, it wasn't that I was deprived; in fact, I had had a lot of women, but you, I wanted you to want me willingly. I wanted to hear you scream my name in the throes of pleasure that I, and I only would give you. Yes, you would be mine someday. So, I let him take control over our body once again, but of course, not without reminding you that I'd be watching even behind his eyes.

The second thing you and her had in common? You both seemed to choose him, not me. She might have chosen me in the beginning, but it the end, she betrayed me.

For him. For him.

I hated and loved her right then. Two edges of the same knife. The only person that I had ever loved had betrayed me for that bastard. Who was supposedly my best friend. I couldn't ever trust anyone after that. And I'll never forgive him for taking her away from me; he also killed in my name, but the fact that he stole her away from me fills me with rage more. You see why I hate him so much now? He stole my only happiness.

But then you came along.

And you were so much like her. And the heartbreak and anger, and kami-sama, the desire all came rushing back to me. I had to have you. At first, I tried my best not to think about you, tried to push you away from me, didn't even acknowledge you as a person. But everyday it became harder and harder; I was like a moth drawn towards a flame; I the moth, you the burning flame. Gods, I should have killed you the first time; I wouldn't have been subject to all these nonsensical pricks of feeling otherwise. If I had killed you, I wouldn't have had a weakness.

Yes. You were indeed my weakness, no matter how much I wanted to deny it.

Maybe not at first, but as time went by, I grew more and more protective of you. Maybe the others didn't see it, or maybe they did, and didn't say anything (although Okuni surely couldn't keep her mouth shut), but it was becoming somewhat obvious to my enemies.

Total and utter shit.

Akira, that blind little shit, he knew when I stepped into the room the day you met him. Damn his heightened reading ki senses. Although I tried to hide it, it still showed. But then again, I shouldn't have been surprised, knowing that he had been one of my elite, one of the former Shiseiten. If he hadn't developed his other senses after going blind, he wouldn't even have survived one day, let alone four years. But that little slip-up of mine was all he needed to use you as my weakness.

When he took you away with Shindara, Bikara and that little snitch Antera in the Aokigahara forest, I was so helpless. So fucking helpless. He'd taken you from me, just like that. And I didn't do anything; couldn't do anything. At first I thought it'd be better that he'd remove you from my sight; at least I could concentrate without any distractions now. Everything proved otherwise. I couldn't even fight properly with Nobunaga, because all I could think about was you and nothing else. Hell, he regained control of our body for some time and took over the goddamn fight for some time because I was so caught up in everything!

Then Akira came back, and said that he taken your life and my body. You probably could not have believed how enraged I was then. Nobody and I mean nobody touches what is MINE!!! Yes, you were mine, even then, even now. But of course, you didn't know that. I would have killed him right then and there if I was up to full strength and didn't have all those stupid wounds. He showed us the gun then. Your gun, with blood on it, no less. That brought me back to the body that I shared with Kyoshirou. I was furious, and had had enough of Akira's taunting.

'…Yuya-san's face when she died…

How she begged for her life, how her voice cracked, how she looked at me, how her blood flowed…'

Anger and rage was brought to the front of my mind. How dare he kill you! No one has the right to do that but me! Oh yes… you were mine to love, torture, pleasure, fuck and if you were to die…

You would die by MY hand, and my hand alone. He wasn't allowed to touch you!

Then you walked through the Jigoku-mon with Shindara and Antera.

Very much alive and in one piece. Not dead as Akira had said. The feelings that coursed through my body then were foreign to me. One of them was shock, and the other was relief. Yet again, you had stirred up what I thought I never had in me. I had to force myself to look away from you then. If I hadn't… strange as it may sound… I would have grabbed you right there and kissed you breathless, and would have punished you for worrying the hell outta me. I would have ravished you in front of all these people, both enemies and fighting companions.

I wanted you, and I wanted you badly.

I felt your eyes on me when I had turned my back towards you. You, no doubt, thought that I was angry at you. I could sense your guilt and sadness. Oh, how far from the truth you were. If only you knew.

You are ultimately…my undoing.

I remember your aura, the look on your face, when Yukimura explained why we had to get my body, and get it soon. If I continued to stay on in Kyoshirou's body, my soul would soon disappear; I knew this well. The soul can only be apart from the body for a period of time. Mine was nearing it's limit after four years of sharing a body with this confounded idiot. I felt touched at the sadness that I felt in your aura when you heard this. Strange, isn't it? That you should have such feelings for such a cold-blooded killer like me; the killer of a 1000 men, and no less. Then you did the most unexpected thing.

'You've got to be kidding! You can't leave before I've collected the bounty on you!

If…if you disappear----

Then no matter what… I'll find a way to bring you back!!'

The earnest look on your face made me want to believe in you so badly. So naïve you are…so idealistic…I couldn't help flashing a smile then, just for you, as I flicked your fingers off my gi, and stalked away. Unbeknownst to you, my smile grew wider as I sensed your shock and strange happiness at the one true, honest smile that I had shown you. Something that no one else had seen before. And grinning evilly and enemies-soon-to-be-corpses wouldn't be what I call a true smile. That's more of an unnerving factor.

You managed to surprise me again when I overheard the conversation between you and Okuni…over that idiot's medicine box, of all things. Much as I hate to admit it, I really needed to hear your answers to Okuni's ever prodding questions. Huh, she probably knew I was standing just outside the shoji door all along.

'At this rate, it wouldn't be strange if Kyo-san changed back to Kyoshirou-sama. If that happened, would you kill Kyo-san's soul along with Kyoshirou-sama?'

Your voice then was soft, trembling, as you struggled to find the right words within yourself to answer the question.

'…All the time we were in the forest…I thought about it…but I still…no matter how much I think about it…I can't find the answer…'

'But there is one thing that I do know. If I really did see Kyoshirou again, I wouldn't know what to do, but I would give this medicine box back to him in person… because I know that no matter what, this medicine box is precious to the Kyoshirou that I know…and then…when I truly see him again in person…we'll take it from there…'

I didn't know what to think right then. Would you choose him over me, like she had? Why was it always him? Couldn't someone, for once, just once, choose me? I thought bitterly to myself then… You fucking bastard Kyoshirou…yet again, another has chosen you over me--- I didn't get to continue my thoughts further then, because the conversation continued.

'So Yuya-san, are you saying that you'll give up on Kyo-san and work on Kyoshirou-sama?'

Fuck. No doubt about it, Okuni knew I was standing outside. I continued to listen, anticipating your answer, which would either save my soul or damn it.

'What…what are you talking about!'

Ah, yes, ever the evasive one you are…the panic in your aura gave you away though. Okuni persisted with her questions.

'Oh, was that wrong? Then you still have feelings for Kyo-san?'

…I wanted to strangle her for doing this! It was absolutely clear that Okuni was enjoying herself to no end. And she knew I wanted the goddamn answer. Seriously…I've got to ask Yukimura one of these days…am I that transparent?

'I-I never said that!---'

'Well then, give up on Kyo-san'

'What on earth!! Don't make decisions all on your own!'

'You do have feelings for him then?'

'I…that is…'

I barely heard what Okuni said about me liking women with huge bosoms after that. I didn't really mind your body though. Although if you did grow a bit, it would make you even more desirable. Not that you weren't desirable enough to me already. My eyes widened fractionally then. Could it really be then? That you did have feelings for me? That you had chosen me instead of that bastard? I felt like smiling right about then. Unbelievable that the red-eyed legend would actually smile after hearing such a silly conversation. I quickly hid the smile under my usual stony expression and left before you found me outside.

Between him and I, you chose me.


Even though you had met him first. I was so sure that you would have chosen him. Now the thing called 'hope' seemed to rear its ugly head, and I, of course, hurriedly tried to quash it. After all, the greater the hope, the greater the disappointment, and if you chose him in the end…I would not be able to take it.

However…if I am truly the one that you choose…then I can wait…until all this is over, I'll make you utterly and completely mine. And I'll make you smile, even if all I can do now is make you cry…I will…give you happiness.

I watch you silently now as you sleep, ever the innocent, angelic temptress, your golden locks spread across your futon, your moist lips slightly parted, eyes closed in peaceful sleep. Even when you sleep you seduce me unknowingly, the blanket you have kicked off some time during the night, and your yukata gapes open, revealing smooth alabaster skin and shapely curves that I long to touch. I bend down towards your face, hands on either side of your head, and allow myself to inhale your scent; sweet lavender fills my senses as I brush your cheek with my calloused fingers and I allow my lips to graze against yours lightly. You moan lightly with the contact and I have to control myself so that I don't rip off your yukata right now and thrust myself deep into you. But, gods… if you only knew how much I wanted you.

I run my fingers lightly along the milky thigh exposed by the yukata, and hear you murmur in your sleep; the butterfly touch seems to affect you somehow, as you unconsciously spread your legs to me, and I feel myself growing harder. I feel like a lost cause now, as my hand moves further inside your yukata, wanting to touch you there and hear you moan my name. I can't help myself now, and my fingers reach your womanhood, and lightly stroke you, half afraid to hurt you, and half afraid that I'll wake you up with my touch. Your eyes don't open, and a strangled moan comes from your lips as your legs move apart unconsciously. Strangely enough, you are still asleep. I smile to myself; just this once then; besides, you'll think it's a dream in the morning, but I will know better. No matter, this is just a little taster as to what you would have if I truly made you mine.

I stroke you lightly again, and you utter yet another erotic moan. With two fingers pressed at your entrance, I make little circular movements on your skin and smile with satisfaction as you spread your legs wider and your breath quickens slightly. My other hand runs along your right thigh as I kneel between your legs, both hands granting you pleasure, while I amusedly watch your hands grip the futon in tight fists. As I continue my ministrations, you grow wetter beneath my fingers, and I slip one digit in slowly as you gasp in your sleep, only to withdraw it just as slowly, and insert it again. Another finger soon joins the one already inside you, and I finger you lightly, searching for that little pleasure spot that will make you more wet than you already are.

I know I've found it when your breathing becomes shallower, and little mewls of pleasure come from your moistened lips. Well, your body unconsciously arching up against my fingers is yet another dead giveaway, and this time, I press two fingers firmly, but gently against your spot, and make those little circular motions again, but faster this time. Your breathing increases, and you gasp a muffled scream, then your inner muscles clench tight against my fingers, and your hips arch further upwards away from the futon, my fingers moving deeper inside of you. A few seconds later, your hips sink back onto the futon, and I smile deviously to myself. Satisfied, I remove my fingers slowly and lick them clean, enjoying the taste and scent of your body and arousal, memorising the taste. I've tasted you now, little one, and I will come back for more.

I whisper softly into your ears 'You are mine.'

Getting up from your futon, I pull your yukata close and pull your blanket over your prone form; your sweet face is flushed pink from my…attentions to you. Once again brushing my lips lightly against yours, I finally leave the room and slide the shoji door close quietly behind me. The bulge against my own sleeping yukata shows that you're not the only one that my ministrations had an effect on, and this time, I'll have to relieve myself before I can sleep.

I just wonder what you'll remember tomorrow. Will you wake up and think it was all just a wet dream? Or will you somehow have little flashes of me being the one who brought you to orgasm? Ah…surprises surprises. That I'll find out tomorrow…yes…

~The next day~

I smile inwardly to myself. I think I have my answer now. You do sense that I had something to do with your state of…stickiness this morning; I can feel the little glares that you send towards me as I pointedly ignore you, and refuse to look at you. Bontenmaru is amused as he watches you watch me. The others can sense something is up as well, although Servant No.2* a.k.a Benitora seems perfectly oblivious to anything and everything. This continues throughout the day, and we finally set down to camp for the night. I see you sitting against a tree, still shooting nervous glances at me. As I get up and walk in your direction, I can see your face pale visibly, and this time I allow an evil grin to show on my face, and for the first time today, I meet your eyes.

With a very, very lustful stare.

I enjoy your reaction as you turn pink suddenly, and your eyes widen. I lean down close to your ear. "You taste so utterly divine." I growl before getting up and I make my way towards the bushes, leaving you utterly shocked, embarrassed and angry.

"Pervert!" You mutter under your breath, as I smile. Yes, I am glad that I met you. Teasing you is just so much fun. Let the games begin. Because at the end of all this, no matter what, I will make you willingly want me, and then I'll make you totally and utterly…


*Servant No. 2 – Kyo's nickname for Benitora; he doesn't refer to Yuya, Benitora, Yukimura, etc etc. as friends, but as servants. :p Yuya is Servant No. 1 (kinky much? Lol)

A/N: o_O I can't believe I wrote that!!! ^^;;; Gods, this one-shot sure is long! Not only does it goes through angst and how Kyo might perceive Yuya, but also some *cough*gratifying material *cough*! This is one of the best ones that I've ever written, in my opinion, and I think it's pretty good, considering this is the first Kyo fic that I've ever written XD and a first lemony thing! Most of the dialogue found here is taken from book 10, where Akira decides to show up in the middle of Nobunaga and Kyo's battle, only to tell everyone that he's 'killed' Yuya and has taken Kyo's body. Lol, yesh, mucho fun ^^;; I know that I've made Kyo kinda OOC, but well, that's to be expected, coz we all know that he probably wouldn't ever admit his feelings for Yuya! Ah yes, veeery deep feelings indeed! *snigger* ok, ok, I'll shut up no