A/N: Holy hell I have been gone a long time! Miss me? Well anyways, here are all the missing bits that you guys have been waiting for! Thank you for being so patient. To anyone who I owe reviews, I'll try and get them all done tonight but I can't promise anything!! Love you all dearly, luv Willow xx


Chapter 27 – That's Funny, A Fly Marrying A Bumblebee

Lucius sat up, throwing Hermione and Ron off of him and he looked around. "It anyone else getting that floating sensation?" He mused, glancing around at the others. "You think I could fly if I tried?" He asked excitedly, jumping to his feet. He looked around again. "Where's Severus?"

Everyone else looked around, except Harry who was still in wonder of whether he actually saw the Powers That Be, and Draco, for obvious reasons. Sirius wandered to the bathroom door, which stood ajar. He peered inside, and there was Severus, sitting in the bath with something in his hand.

Lucius walked up behind Sirius and peered over his shoulder. Seeing Severus, his face fell. "Oh crap. How many of them has he swallowed?" He asked and Sirius shrugged. Lucius pushed him out of the way and went into the bathroom. "How many of these has you swallowed love?"

Severus grinned and giggled a little. "All of them." He said, which was followed by a major giggle fit. Lucius grabbed the packet from his hand.

"You know what happens when you have more than three of these!" He threw the packet to Sirius. "Get rid of that and find me some plain white bread and a pint of water. We'll have to try and get it all out of his system."

Sirius regarded the packet. "What harm can Smarties do? It's just chocolate." He said, as if that made everything okay. James, Hermione and Ron all dashed over to where Sirius was standing and looked at him in shock.

"It's not 'just chocolate' when it's in the system of Severus Snape!" Hermione exclaimed. "He gets all excited and… have you ever seen one of Lucius' sugar highs? Triple that, at the very least, but he's had a whole packet, things could get out of control!"

"I think it's a bit late for that." Ron said, pointing at Severus, who was crawling up the wall and across the ceiling. Ron shuddered. "Looks just like a spider up there. Someone get him down."

James gladly obliged. He grabbed a broom and started jabbing at Severus until suddenly, dramatically, Severus fell off the ceiling, and onto Lucius. Everyone rushed over to help the two of them untangle, and there was much cursing as limbs were rearranged in the correct places.

A cough made them all look up from their tangled bundle on the floor. Harry looked very white. "Girls… I have two daughters… Is that gonna happen to me? Is my body gonna do that?!" He mused for a moment before leaning on the sink for support.

Lucius slithered free of everyone else and stood on the toilet seat in a rather commanding way. "Right, this is what we're gonna do! James, Sirius, you are in charge of making sure that boy doesn't faint." He said pointing at Harry. "Ron, Hermione, you are on baby duty. And when I say that I mean Kellan and Elorah-Dannen, who have been abandoned. Severus…" He glanced at the giggling, twitching bundle on the floor. "… Stay there and try not to hurt yourself."

Severus seemed to find that very amusing and burst into laughter. Shaking his head, Lucius wandered back into the other room, where a very worn out Draco was sitting on the floor, holding two piles of blankets. "They're gorgeous." Lucius smiled, sliding down the wall and sitting on the floor next to Draco.

"Yeah they are." Draco said softly. "Daddies little girls." He looked up at his father and smiled serenely. He placed each of the babies on top of a pillow beside him so that he could still see them. And he punched Lucius. Granted, it wasn't very hard, but the point was that he punched him. In the nose.

"What the hell was that for?!" Lucius shrieked, holding him nose and check for blood.

"You left me you git! There was me, in labour, having twins and you walked off!! You started a band!!" Draco raged, and as if to agree with his father, baby girl Malfoy #1 started wailing.

The door was thrown open and Ron staggered in and fell on the floor. Lucius rolled his eyes and let out a sigh and crawled over to where Ron was laying on the floor. "What's the matter with you now?" He asked, laying on the floor next to Ron.

"She zapped me." He said in the most pathetic tone of voice you have ever heard. He suddenly looked very scared. He froze up and didn't move, Lucius' forehead scrunched up and he looked over his shoulder. He too froze.

A slightly more composed Severus walked out of the bathroom followed by Sirius, James and Harry. They two froze where they stood.

Draco started to panic and dragged the twins back onto his lap. Both there now crying. They all stared at the figure standing by the door. "I didn't interrupt anything did I?" He asked.

For a long while there was silence. Lucius sat up and stared at him. "Albus… when did you start wearing stockings? And I must say that corset looks… um… lovely."

"Yes it is rather isn't it. I always fancied myself as a brilliant dresser."

"You certainly got our attention." James said in what he hoped was an off hand tone. Harry walked over and sat on the floor next to Draco.

"Well? Do I get to hold the little darlings then?" Dumbledore said, stepping a little further into the room.

Draco smiled at him and grabbed Harry's shirt. "Don't let him touch my children." He hissed and Harry was actually quite scared of the violet glare he received.

"Yes dear. The twins need their rest now. Some other time perhaps?" He said hopefully and smiled desperately.

"Yes yes, alright. I'll come by some other time. But for now I must go and show Minerva my new outfit!" He said excitedly and departed. Everyone let out a breath of relief that the freak had gone.

"Well… that was a bit different…" Severus said quietly, everyone nodded silently in agreement.