"Hitori nakiakashita yoake: Alone I cry till the dawn comes"



Warnings: Shounen-ai

Disclaimer: Aint mines dun sue....poor starving azn student.

It was not hard. Actually it was painfully easy. Falling in love that is. You would always expect it to hit you hard and fast without a warning, but instead you drift into it. Slowly as sinking into a bed of feathers. He never expected him to come into his life. A year of verbal abuse, cold attitude and the boy was still here. Many would have left him already or better yet he would have left them. Somehow this time was different. He was different. The boy was unlike anyone he ever met, he was strong and stubborn. He stood by his side through thick and thin. Through all the mess, the obstacles, and the abuse the boy was still with him.

It may be easy for some to let go of their emotions, his boyfriend was proof of that fact. He lets his emotion run freely. He wears his heart on his sleeve even if it meant his heart getting broken over and over, but he always comes out of it stronger than before. There was a inner passion within him that makes people gravitate towards him like a moth to a flame. The passion was something that burns and moving free. Touching everyone's live in some way.

There were good times in their relationship actually. They go out on some evenings, to an amusement park or a quiet dinner in a restaurant, but most of the time they just stayed at home. That was all it was needed to keep the boy happy, just some quality time with his boyfriend. He didn't care about anything else. Through all this he never utter the important words the he knew his boyfriend always wanted to hear. Once when he questioned the boy about it, the boy just replied "A single action can express a lifetime of words."

The boy poetic. He had a certain way of words. It flows and ring true in the human heart. The simple nature of his writing was something he had always criticize but it was also something that attarcted him to his boyfriend. As a novleitst he writes more easily the words that he wanted to say but never could. It was hard for him and now he was unable to utter the words to his boyfriend now. Even when he wanted to. He wanted to shout out the words.

The cold was getting to him. Winter in Japan was harsh this year. He looked at the gravestone. A beautiful marble one that cost him a tiny fortune but it was worth it. Elegance script dance on the dark marble. He stilled remember that day. He just came back from the supermarket. His boyfriend was coming home from his Europe tour and he wanted to make him something special. The phone rang just as he began boiling water for the pasta, but the pasta never reached the water and the food was never ate. All he remember from that night was the words, "Come to the hospital now." Everything was a blur, but it didn't matter because in the end his boyfriend was dead. Apprently the bullet was heading towards some little girl when his boyfriend push her away and got hit instead. It went straight to his heart, he was killed instantly.. Now instead of a warm soft body to cuddle to at night, he has the cold, hard marble. The sun was beginning to set and he knew he had to leave soon. "Ai shiteru Shuichi" three words a little to late. "Itsumo Ai shiteru Shuichi."

"Totemo ureshikatta yo

kimi ga warai kakede ta

Subete o tokasu chou emi de

Haru wa mada tookute

tsumetai tsuchi no naka de

Me fuku toki o matte ta 'n da

Tatoeba kurushii kyou da to shite mo

Kinou no kizu o nokoshite ite mo

Shinjitai kokoro hodo ite yukere to"

I was so happy, you were laughing

With a smile that melts everything away

Spring is still far away,

inside the cold earth,

Waiting for the time to sprout

For instance, even if today is painful

And yesterday's wounds remain

I want to believe that I can free my heart and go on


A/N: sorry it came out this way. I wanted a happy ending but I guess not. Well read and review. O yeah the song lyrics are from the opening of fruits basket. I thought they were fitting in this case. Think of it as the ending song for this story.