Welcome reader. I am aware that you expected a full chapter however, due to unforeseen circumstances (and the fact that I want a bit more SasuNaru action), I have written something that is a bit of a review of the past eight chapters but mostly filled with what you've all been waiting for: SasuNaru-ness (of sorts) and a few other strange pairings that may cause you to shy away or quirk an eyebrow in question. Either way, if you choose to read this chapter, you're pretty much screwed.

Though I'm certain that this is completely irrelevant to the fic itself and everyone is quite obviously out of character, I hope you will enjoy it our beloved character's private life. Now let us begin.

Title: Realities Away
By: SukiAme
Entry: Gag – So what Happens off the fic? What we took out.


"Go!" Sasuke commanded Naruto as he prepared to fight the three ninjas that appeared.

Naruto paused and stared incredulously at Sasuke, "I - "

"Go! One of us has to protect Yoshikawa-san!" Sasuke said again more forcefulness, "Don't stand there like an idiot! I'll catch up!"

"But Sasuke, I don't want to leave you," Naruto retorted locking on to Sasuke's arm, his eyes pleading, "I have this horrible feeling that something bad will happen if I leave you."

Sasuke bowed his head and then pulled Naruto towards him. He put his hand under Naruto's chin and tilted the blonde's head to look into his eyes. Planting a small kiss on Naruto's cheek he gave a hardly visible smile, "I'll be fine. Go."

-cut-

"I would never say something so girly! I demand a rewrite," Naruto yelled pointing angrily at the small group of writers, "If you don't, I'll quit!"

"Fine, we'll take it out."

-:-:-

"Sasuke?" Naruto cautiously strolled up to him and stared closely at his eyes, then he back up looking miserable, "You've lost your memory haven't you? This is my fault... if I had been alert, those guys wouldn't have tied me up and you wouldn't be hurt. It must've been those hand motions that the guy was making. You can't even remember that this is your room. Do you remember me?"

"Naruto... I haven't lost my memories. I know who you are." Sasuke scoffed, "It'd take a hell of a lot more than a kunai to my shoulder to forget you." Sasuke opened a door to what he assumed would be a closet only to find a bathroom. "Damn it, where's my friggin' shirt?" He cursed as he slammed the door shut.

Naruto gave him a slightly mocking smirk, "You seriously have no idea where anything is, do you?" Naruto asked as he received a glare from Sasuke, "And I still don't know how you got that cut." Naruto gingerly touched Sasuke's shoulder and rested his head on it, all traces of his smile was gone. "Sasuke, I'm sorry... For what happened."

Sasuke stared at Naruto with a glazed over look as he tried in vain to rid the thought of how nice it was to have Naruto resting against him and how cute he was when he sounded so sincerely sorry. With a distraction like Naruto, who really cared if he had no idea where he was.

"Naruto," Sasuke's hand found itself entangled in Naruto's hands before he pushed him back and onto the bed. Naruto blinked, staring up at Sasuke with a blush graced on his face, "You know you are very attractive don't you?"

Before Naruto got a chance to reply, Sasuke leaned down covering the small of Naruto's mouth with his own. The kiss was long and the first one was always sweet and always exciting, and to Sasuke's surprise, he didn't want to lose contact with Naruto. There was a satisfying shiver that ran down his spine when he licked Naruto's mouth beckoning the boy to open his mouth which the boy did.

He took a little time to explore the crevices of Naruto's mouth as his hands moved on their own, slowly unbuttoning Naruto's shirt. A small moan escaped Naruto's lips when Sasuke-

-cut-

"Stop," Neji interjected jumping in front of the camera pointing at the writers, "This is supposed to be rated PG! I refuse to watch Naruto be subjected to your twisted fantasies!"

"If you don't want to watch, then go away, Hyuuga! We're a little busy at the moment!" Sasuke yelled irritably at the long haired boy giving him the middle finger and shooting an icy glare.

"I won't have you do such things to Naruto in PG fic!" Neji shouted at Sasuke, stomping over to the two boys on the bed ignoring all the dark looks that Sasuke threw at him.

"What if we let you do –censored- and –censored- and –censored- to Naruto?" one of the writers asked Neji.

"Hell no!" Sasuke protested jumping up and glaring at both Neji and the group of writers, "That guy is not going anywhere near Naruto!"

It was hard to say who started the fight but Naruto got away unscathed when Shikamaru mumbled something about it being troublesome and luring the boy away with a bowl of ramen.

-:-:-

A small snap reached Sasuke's ears and within the next millisecond, he pushed Naruto over and onto the wooden floor. "Get down!" As Sasuke fell forward and shielded Naruto, he heard several whizzing sounds fly past his head and then a pattern of loud donks as the projectiles struck the wall.

Then a slow clapping filled the rooms, its loudness magnified as the sound waves bounced off the walls. Sasuke pushed himself off the blond and searched for the source of applause but froze in horror to see Itachi leaning against the frame of the entrance, watching the two listlessly.

"Itachi." Sasuke spat viciously as he unconsciously activated his sharingan.

"My name is Uchiha Sasuke. You killed my father, prepare to die." Sasuke said getting into a defensive position.

Itachi stared noncommittally at Sasuke before saying, "You stole that off of The Princess Bride. Don't start stealing lines from movies little brother, it's not becoming and you just can't pull off the same amount of coolness."

"How dare you say I am not cool?! You're uncool!" Sasuke pointed accusingly at Itachi with a glare.

"I don't really care what you say," Itachi replied not even bothering to glance at Sasuke's insignificant being which peeved the younger Uchiha to no end. "Besides, not only am I better than you could ever wish to be, but I believe Naruto-kun is willing to follow me more than you."

"You lie," Sasuke said turning to Naruto and shaking him, "Tell me he's lying. Who would you choose; me or Itachi?"

Naruto gazed at the older Uchiha with adoration, "Ramen!"

-cut-

"That's not even in the fic! Damn it Itachi! You're cheating! He's weak against ramen!" Sasuke shouted cursing his brother who held a bowl of ramen in his hands holding it just out of the blond boy's reach.

"I'm not cheating. What's wrong with exploiting someone's weakness for your own gain? Nothing," Itachi replied, lowering the bowl to give the blonde, patting him on the head like he would a puppy. "You're just angry you didn't think of it first."

He's right, Sasuke thought somewhere in the depths of his mind but he would never admit to it. "Damn it, I want him fired!" Sasuke shouted to the writers, "Or at least scorched a little bit!"

"As in burned?" asked another nameless writer, "I think we can do that. Actually, never mind. We can't burn Itachi; he's too pretty to be marred by fire. The only thing that can hurt him is a sword or other dangerous weapons with a sharp edge and any other physical or psychological trauma. It's an anime law."

"Damn it! I get no justice!"

-:-:-

"I'm leaving," Naruto announced abruptly as he angrily trudged to the exit of the library. But before he completely left Sasuke alone, he muttered a distinctive and bitter, "Jackass."

Sasuke leaned back as the wall shelf supported his weight. He brought his arm to his mouth and rubbed it like a madman. His eyes were hard as he focused his stare to the broken lamp. He lowered his arm and slid down to the floor, completely appalled by the entire incident.

When Sasuke realized that Naruto was leaving he pushed himself up and ran out of the room only to find that Naruto was nowhere to be seen. A sudden irrational fear coursed through him. What if he never sees Naruto again? What if Naruto actually was going to abandon him after that small incident?

He really hadn't meant to hit him. It was just reflex. He hadn't thought that Naruto would kiss him. Naruto really shouldn't have kissed him like that when he'd known that he was a little disoriented. Though, Sasuke had to admit, that he had asked Naruto to tell him.

It was technically his fault.

And if that was the case of their relationship then if it were the other way around, Sasuke supposed that he would be a little upset too. It would also explain that moment of excitement he felt when Naruto was so close to him and even that prang of loneliness he felt.

"I am such an idiot." Sasuke muttered covering his face with his hands, his shoulders shaking for reasons that even he didn't understand.

"Yeah, you kind of are," a voice came from behind him.

"Shut up," Sasuke snapped, refusing to look at the man.

"Let me rephrase that, you are an idiot," Itachi leaned against the frame of the library door watching Sasuke.

"Damn it! I thought you were fired," Sasuke yelled pointing at Itachi with a sharp glare.

"Sorry, Luv; that's not going to happen any time soon," Itachi said with a smirk, putting one hand against the wall next to Sasuke, pinning him there. He leaned down closely to his younger brother and said, "You see, I can't seem to leave you alone because if I do, you'll lose your purpose in life which is to try to kill me. But I don't want you to because I-"

-cut-

"Stop! You're too close to each other," Naruto yelled cutting in to Itachi's short monologue. He ran up to the older Uchiha boy and stepped between the siblings, glaring at Itachi, "Incest!"

"Naruto-kun," Itachi leaned down and-

"Lech!"

After a moment's flurry, Sasuke was standing protectively in front of Naruto breathing heavily as if he had been running. Itachi on the other hand was sitting on the floor, nursing the large red handprint on his cheek shooting dark looks at Sasuke.

The writers gathered and after a moment's consideration took out that scene.

-:-:-

"You recovered yet?" He interjected with a light (concerned) tone.

"Yeah, pretty much," Sasuke answered suavely as he took a step toward the blonde, "Are you worried about me?"

"Well, yeah," Naruto mumbled looking away from the dark haired boy, "sort of."

"Really," Sasuke asked slyly, stepping closer to Naruto with a seductive smirk on his lips, "Well I'm feeling loads better now. Would you like to test how energetic I feel?"

Naruto looked at Sasuke with a hopeful perk, "Let's go then! A sparring match! Winner takes loser out to ramen!"

That was not what I was thinking. Sasuke shook his head, taking Naruto's arm, "Actually, was hoping for something a little different."

"Like what? Oh, how about who can catch the most fishes with his bare hands," Naruto suggested, his eyes lighting up with a kindling sort of fire, "Let's go! I'm BURNING!"

I know that that is not supposed to have a double meaning but if he says anything else like that I'm going to be forced to jump him.

-cut-

"What do you want now, Neji?" asked one of the writers.

"Uchiha is having dirty thoughts! I know that glazed over look! He's having lecherous thoughts of debouching Naruto!"

"And how would you know, Hyuuga?" Sasuke asked narrowing his eyes as if appalled to hear such accusations. He crossed his arms and gave Neji a pointed look, "Could it be that you've had such thoughts and accusing someone else to cover your own shameful actions?"

"You want to take this outside," Neji snapped pulling Sasuke by the scruff of his shirt.

"Security!" Naruto yelled to have two men in uniform march over. As he pointed at Neji and Sasuke, he said, "They're causing a problem in filming. Please escort them out."

"Naruto," Neji and Sasuke scolded at the same moment while the guards began to drag them away.

"Hey," Naruto said waddling to the writers, "What does lecherous and debouching mean?"

"You don't want to know," answer one of the writers.

-:-:-

"Must you always goad me?"

"Until you cave, yeah, that's pretty much what I'll to do," Naruto moved to take Sasuke's former spot by the window and sat cross legged on the chair facing Sasuke with a determined expression in his eyes, "Besides, since when did you start saying no to B-ranked missions?" When Sasuke didn't answer Naruto stared thoughtfully out at the evening, "Or I can always ask Neji. It was cool working with him when you were out."

"No, not with Neji. I don't want you seeing him any more."

Naruto cocked an eye and asked cynically, "What are you, my mother?"

"Lord forbid should the day that ever happens," Sasuke murmured turning away from the other's scrutiny.

-cut-

"What was that supposed to be? Are you insulting my mother," Naruto demanded, roughly shoving Sasuke against the wall. He eyes were shielded with a layer of anger as he snapped, "Just because I never had a mother doesn't mean you can insult the woman who gave birth to me! How would you like it if I started insulting your mother?! Or did she find you so much of an abomination that she'd rather leave you than raise you?"

"Shut up! I'll –censored- (note: Swears were omitted due to ratings) kill you, you motherless –censored-!" Sasuke shouted just as angry as the blond before he threw a punch at Naruto.

Repressing the groan of pain, Naruto glared spitefully at Uchiha before jumping on him, delivering several blows in the process. They got to a point were the furious swipes caused scratches and bruises forcing more security to step in to stop the brawl. When the clouds had cleared, Naruto and Sasuke were standing atop a pile of unconscious bodies, breathing heavily, their backs facing one another.

They made a picturesque image of a pair of long time partners despite their resentment towards the other. And then all hell broke loose when they decided to turn on each other now that the problem has been resolved.

After several moments of cursing and painful moans, the writers decided to leave them to calm down; they hoped that the duo would patch things up and miraculously, they did. But of course, that is another story.

-:-:-

"Want to go to a movie this weekend?" Neji asked though his eyes never wavered from the soccer field, "I heard a new American sci-fi just came out."

Naruto stood next to Neji as he leaned with his back against the window. His head tilted upward and grinned while he stared at the ceiling, "Are you asking me out?"

"Well," Neji replied bringing his attention to the boy next to him, "It really depends on what you mean when you say 'asking me out.' I meant it in the most literal sense when I invited you; how you chose to interpret that is entirely up to you," Neji leaned closely to Naruto with a smirk on his lips, hardly an inch away from the blond, "Isn't it?"

"Neji-kun," Naruto began getting a mischievous sparkle in his eyes, "I do believe that you, my friend, are trying to seduce me."

"And if I am," Neji whispered in an almost husky way, his warm breath glazed over Naruto's cheek as his fingers unconsciously traced the blond boy's jaw line, "What will you do, Naruto-sama?"

"I-"

-cut-

"I'll kill him," Sasuke screamed in fury, his Sharingan eyes activated as he jumped onto the set a set of shuriken in one hand and a shining new kunai in the other, "I'll –censored- kill that –censored- think he's so great Hyuuga!

"How dare you even speak my Naruto like that," Sasuke rambled angrily, pointing his kunai in Neji's direction, "Much less touch him!"

"My, my," Neji began as he pulled away from Naruto and crossed his arms, sneering at Sasuke, "Aren't we jealous. I'd never picture you as the type to get all riled up like this, Uchiha."

"Shut the hell up, Hyuuga!"

"Hey," Naruto said pulling Neji's attention by pulling at the other boy's long black hair. With a completely clueless pout he asked in all seriousness, "Why is Sasuke jealous?"

"I," Sasuke gritted through his teeth, miffed and advancing on the pair, "Am not jealous!"

"Well, Naruto," Neji began closing his eyes in lecture and nodded to a nonexistent wind, "When little boys grow older, they begin to realize that they feel a lot more for certain things or people. There are many reasons for that, one would be that they learn more words to express how they feel. Another would be that little boys and girls hit this stage called puberty and a large mass of hormones are released. For boys, it's something called testosterone and this chemical causes changes in your body and increases your sexual drive even. That is why Uchiha behaves this way."

Had Sasuke not been restrained by several other well known cast members who have and never have appeared in this fic, he would have had Neji dead by that point; or at least maimed.

Naruto nodded his head in understanding, "I see," with a wicked grin on his face, Naruto continued, "So you are causing an increase in Sasuke's sexual drive which means that he's jealous of me!"

"…" No one present knew how to respond to that except for Shikamaru.

"Yes, Naruto," Shikamaru sighed, deciding to humor him. His hands were in his pocket as he paced about the background, away from the scene that Sasuke had caused, "Sasuke is jealous of you because he wants Neji's apparently hot and sexy body."

"And the hair," Hinata piped from restraining Sasuke who looked ready to not only kill Neji but beat some sense into Naruto and maybe Shikamaru who was cynically supporting Naruto's idea.

"Oh," Naruto nodded, bopping a fist on the palm of his hand, "Then that means that Sasuke likes Neji, right?" Not waiting for a protest from anyone, Naruto continued his rant, "Well, that kind of sucks because I liked him. But I'll support you, Sasuke! I want you to be happy!"

"No, you're wrong!" Sasuke protested, finally able to, "That's not right! The one I like is-"

"It's okay, Sasuke," Naruto said backing away from Neji, winking at his teammate. "I'll get a rewrite if it means that much to you, you don't have to cause a scene."

"But I hate, Hyuuga! I really like-"

"Maybe I can even ask the writers to do a little something, something for you two."

"Naruto, you're being an idiot. Uchiha doesn't like me, I don't like him. Uchiha likes-"

"I get it, you two don't have to hide it any more. But I'm a little sad now," Naruto sighed walking away towards the writers' room, "Maybe I can get a happy scene with someone else."

"Stop acting so dejected, Naruto-kun! We have to turn that frown upside-down," Lee said going after him, "Let's go run laps!"

Shikamaru sighed with an apologetic wave at Sasuke and Neji not that he really cared but Naruto was really just asking for an answer and he couldn't answer without being sarcastic, "I think I'll go get some ramen or something. Do you want to come, Naruto?"

"I love you, Shikamaru!"

Back at the set, two very angry bloodline limit users growled under their breaths, "I will kill that Shikamaru."

-:-:-

"You know," Sasuke began after his coughing fit finally died and hopefully buried, "You could really be helpful and get a doctor to come take a look at me."

Itachi hummed before saying, "I could, couldn't I?"

"But you won't because you're a twisted psychopath," Sasuke replied bitterly sinking into his arms as he sent sharp glares at Itachi, "I hate you."

"I'm so glad," Itachi replied, idly flipping the page he had finished, "I hope you realize that you argue like a five year old girl."

"I do not!"

"Yes, you do."

"I do not times infinity."

"Thank you for giving an example, oh great genius."

"Shut up, Freak."

"Brat."

"Murderer."

"Weakling."

"Jerk."

"Twit."

"Pretty boy."

"Why thank you."

-cut-

"Erm, do you Uchiha brothers think you could stop calling each other names?" asked Writer no. 1.

"Even Sasuke and Neji aren't this bad," added Writer no. 2.

"Please, even Sasuke and Naruto aren't this bad," Writer no. 3 put in.

"That's because Sasuke loves Naruto," Writer no. 4 chimed.

"Did you realize that all the arguments consist of Sasuke?" commented writer no. 5.

"He's very demanding and hard for everyone else to get along with," said writer no. 2.

"Maybe we should fire him," suggested writer no. 5.

"I would consent to that. We can make me the protagonist rather than my younger brother," Itachi said approaching the group.

"That's not such a bad idea," writer no. 3 remarked with a nod.

"You can't do that! What would Naruto do then?" Writer no. 4 said.

"You can't do that! Your readers would be angry!" Sasuke snapped throwing his fork down on the table, "They want to see me and Naruto get together!"

"You; Itachi; it's all the same." Writer no. 5 stated.

"Could you two siblings please get back on set? I would like to leave before the end of the world or those fans kill us all." Writer no. 1 said pointing back to the set.

-:-:-

A soft voice alerted him as he turned to the navy haired girl who glided past him while her hair tied back in a loose ponytail that sashayed on her back almost like a taunting cat toy. "Something wrong, Sasuke-kun?"

"Yes, in fact, there is," Sasuke said glaring at the back of their leader's head with distaste. "I don't want Naruto going anywhere near that lazy bum. He's plotting something I'm sure. Did you hear what he made Naruto say earlier?"

"Actually, Shikamaru-kun didn't make Naruto-kun say anything. Shikamaru-kun merely jokingly answer Naruto-kun's question about you and Neji-niisan. It was obviously a joke and yet you are taking this far too seriously," Hinata commented as she held on to her backpack straps pulling it, "And then Shikamaru-kun decided to go eat. It really wasn't his fault that Naruto-kun said 'I love you' to him."

"Yes it was! If he wasn't in this fic, I would kill him."

"You're not being fair, Sasuke-kun. What did Shikamaru-kun ever do to you?"

"He turned him against me," Sasuke commented, gesturing at Naruto, "Come on, Hinata-san, you must be at least a little upset. I mean, you're obsessed with Naruto to the point of stalking. And to hear him say-"

"I do not stalk Naruto-kun," Hinata snapped, loosing the shy façade that she usually put up in front of everyone save Lee and Neji, "Nor am I obsessed with him. If anything, you're the obsessive stalker!"

"What? How, pray tell, am I," Sasuke pointed at himself, "An obsessive stalker? I don't stalk anyone, especially Naruto."

"You always appear whenever he has a scene. Whoever the scene is with, you get completely snippy and almost hurt the latter person forcing our poor writers to rewrite the scene; usually, that person is Neji-niisan. First of all, why are you always there when Naruto-kun has a scene? Secondly, how do you seem to know where he is all the time? Thirdly, why are you so upset when anyone gets even remotely intimate with him?"

"I do not," Sasuke denied.

"Yes you do."

"I don't times infinity."

"You argue like a five year old," Hinata said dryly.

"No I don't dammit! Have you been talking to Itachi," Sasuke demanded.

-cut-

"I have no comment for this nostalgic scene," muttered one of the writers.

"I think I like her," Itachi commented leaning against a wall as he watched the scene being filmed.

-:-:-

Shikamaru heaved a sigh as he glanced at Naruto's limped body, resting like a sack of rice against the tree. "This is so troublesome," he said as crouched in front of Naruto with his back to the unconscious boy, "Put him on my back."

"No," Sasuke refused for the unconscious Naruto, "No thank you. I will carry Naruto." Surprisingly, Sasuke was able to say it in an obnoxiously sneering way while giving Shikamaru a very pointed look, "Wouldn't want Naruto to be molested now would we?"

Shrugging, Shikamaru helped Hinata put Naruto on Sasuke's back. "It'd be a pain in the ass if he was," Shikamaru drawled to Hinata who was walking with him. "I would not be surprised if Sasuke tried to though. But I don't really give a damn about Uchiha's well being."

"But you care about Naruto-kun right?"

"That's only because he's my friend."

"Shikamaru-kun," Hinata said quietly, "Do you like Naruto-kun like the way that Sasuke-kun likes him?"

Shikamaru stopped walking and raised an eyebrow at Hinata, "You're kidding me right? First of all, it's Naruto. He's loud and he's a pain the butt. I pity the person who is going to be his partner in life. Secondly, I'd sooner like Ino in that way than Naruto but that's not saying much. Women are troublesome."

"Thank you so much, Shikamaru-kun," Hinata replied a little sarcastically at his insulting of the female gender, "As if men are so holy. Oh look, I'm a man; I like to get drunk; I don't know how to pick up after myself; I get laid all the time. Pig." She said spitefully before she tramped off the set.

-cut-

"What the heck?" Shikamaru asked confused.

"I think she's been talking to Tenten," Neji supplied glaring at the set.

"Why are you here?" Shikamaru asked Neji. At Neji's silence he realized that behind him, there was still a slightly intimate scene occurring between a possibly sexually repressed Sasuke and an unconscious Naruto. "Oh crap, I left them alone. Ah, it's too troublesome." By the time he finished what he said, Neji was already gone.

"I am not responsible," the boy muttered as he wandered off to find something else to do.

-:-:-

Then there was a picture of the woman standing in a floured apron with a mischievous grin on her face.

"She's dead you know," a familiar voice came from behind him.

Turning around, Sasuke saw Naruto looking at him in miffed questioning. He stretched a little causing his white t-shirt ride a little before he dropped his arms to settle down, as he peered at Sasuke. Lowering himself on the quilt that covered his leather couch, he pulled his legs up, sitting in a cross-legged position still looking a little groggy.

Sasuke glanced away from the boy as he wondered whether Naruto realized how tantalizing he looked in his striped oversized pants and t-shirt. And his tired stretching looked positively wanton causing Sasuke to feel unnecessarily hot. And since Naruto was in his half-asleep state, would he even realize what was happening should Sasuke decide to ravish him with kisses?

Of course he would, Naruto wasn't that unconscious, but the thought couldn't help but flutter across the outskirts of his mind.

But no, he must restrain himself. He didn't want to scare Naruto nor did he actually have or want any type of intimate relationship with him. Besides, it was bad, wrong, a sin. Naruto was his friend; more importantly, Sasuke had a problem at the moment so he would just have to deal with it. So he sat down a little distance from the blond.

"Can I do something for you?" Naruto asked his eyes half-closed as he gazed at Sasuke.

And then Sasuke mentally cursed at Naruto. How can he ask something like that? Did he not realize that there were double meanings to that? And that expression was a little too much even for him. Sasuke felt himself shaking from something that was repressed because he forced his stiff body to move further from the blonde. He had to keep control of himself. There would be nothing good save the few moments of self satisfaction should Sasuke lose control of himself.

"Naruto," He began, his hands clenched in a tight ball. "I… have a problem. And I want you to help me with it."

After he heard what he said, Sasuke mentally slapped himself. He couldn't believe that those words actually came out of his mouth. The words "I want you" brought on more impure thoughts in his mind and he actually say "help!" That word did not belong in the Uchiha vocabulary.

Torn between a carnivorous desire and pride, Sasuke didn't know how to proceed with the rest of the conversation. And then, to his horror, Naruto moved, tucking his legs to his side as he propped his head up with an arm that was supported by the couch's armrest. The lower half of Naruto's shirt rode up revealing his peachy yet pale abdomen, it was flat and he knew there was not much excess fat but his muscles weren't defined enough for one to say that Naruto regularly exercised.

Naruto was his seductive torturer, his charming executioner and had his tormentor been a woman…

"Alluring temptress," were the words he uttered before-

-cut-

"I think Sasuke is acting too angst filled," Neji commented with crossed arms, casually sending glares at Sasuke.

"I am not! I mean, shut up," Sasuke snapped sitting back in his armchair, "I'm not falling into that trap again."

"Hey," Naruto said sitting up so that he looked decent. Then again, he wasn't aware that he had been indecent either, "What does 'alluring temptress' mean?"

Itachi, who had shown up to watch the scene filmed, said to Naruto, "I'll tell you if you come with me."

"That's what it means," Neji said before he glared at the writers, "And what the hell do you think you're doing, writing angst with a hint of it hitting PG-13? Any more and it would've started bordering R. Well?"

"Erm," the writers looked away guiltily, "We were reading angst R fics…"

"We should cut out the angst," said Writer no. 5.

"And take out the fallacy," added Writer no. 2, "This is after all, a PG fic."

"You can never take out all the fallacy," Writer no. 4 informed Writer no. 2.

"True; because then it would just be no fun because we can't write that way."

-end chapter-


AN: Well, I hope you enjoyed it. I enjoyed it at least. If you wonder about Hinata, I'm a bit of a feminist so I'm having fun stereotyping. If I haven't scared you off, please stay tune for the next chapter which gets a little wacky and a little twisted but mostly wacky.

Review responses: Thank you for reviewing!
s (-wide eyed- you love me?! Yay! –heart-), SaLLy11 (I going to
try to make their return believable but I think things are going to get a bit more confusing with the next chapter), kurokioku, Gi wo mite sezaru wa ya n, Momichi Zabuza (Thank you for the wish and I hope this gag chapter satiated your SasuNaru desires for a little while), Princess Krystal01, Iceheart19, Kaelas, QianYun (gack, how did you know I was shoving everything in?! –guilty- Sorry you don't get any answers in this chapter though XD), xxphatxbaybeexx, Danya2, and cheesemaker.

And I'll see you next month! I should be able to have a better grasp on what will happen next. And Happy 2005 everyone!