"You're what?" Snape hissed out between clenched teeth.
"I'm pregnant, Sev," Harry repeated patiently, sitting down on a nearby chair.
"B-but how could this have happened?" Severus sputtered, all thoughts of the tests he'd been grading flying from his mind.
A twinkle in his eye, Harry said, "Well, when two people love each other very much…"
"I know that part, Potter. What I meant was, how could you be pregnant? You're a man."
"I am quite aware of that fact, Severus," Harry returned drolly. "But surely you must realize that while I am a man, I am also a wizard. A very powerful wizard, in fact, and sometimes very powerful wizards use their magic unconsciously. Remember how I beat Voldemort? He cast the killing curse, and even though I was almost unconscious, and didn't have my wand, I still managed to reflect it so it hit him instead?"
Snape looked at him skeptically. "So you're saying that unconsciously you wanted to get pregnant? For Merlin's sake, why?!"
Blushing Harry said, "Well, it was after we'd gone to see Ron and 'Mione's new twins. I was thinking that you'd make such a good father, and when you pounced me that evening, I must've focused in on that."
Severus looked surprised at Harry's words – him, a good father? – but thought for a moment about their situation.
"Well," he said finally. "I suppose it could happen. But in all cases where male pregnancy has happened, it was a planned event. It had to be, because both parties had to use their magic to make it happen…" He trailed off, his face draining of all color, as he realized what he was implying.
Harry grinned. "I guess it was meant to happen, then."
Severus was at a loss. "But I don't understand – neither of us knew what the other was thinking, and without joint focus, it still shouldn't have happened…"
"Since both of us are powerful wizards, maybe we didn't need to know in order to focus," Harry suggested. "I'm more concerned about the numbers."
"Numbers?" Severus asked, floundering for understanding.
Taking a deep breath, Harry broached the topic cautiously. "Well, we each have at least twice as much magic as most Wizards, and we'd gone to see the twins that evening…and I'm definitely showing more than normal for not being even three months pregnant. My larger stomach was the first clue I had that I was pregnant."
"You think we're having twins?" Severus squeaked.
Harry nodded. "I'm not sure, though. But it's possible."
"Oh, wonderful," Severus snarked. "I never planned on us having children to begin with, and now you tell me we're most likely having two?"
"Well, Sev, as you pointed out, it takes two to make this spell work. You can't blame all of this on me," Harry said, voice hard.
Sighing, Severus put his head in his hands and said, "I know. But I wish I could."
"Whyever would you want to do that?" Harry demanded, exasperated.
Directing a glare at his husband, Severus said, "Because if I recall, your dog-father still doesn't even know we're married. How in the world are you planning to explain this to him?"
Harry gulped. "I-I hadn't thought of that."
Nodding, Severus said, "I thought not."
Practically hyperventilating, Harry summed their situation up in two words: "Oh, shit."