Notes: Implies Rory/Jess. G. Inspired by a Something Corporate song "Only Ashes". I don't know where this came from ... [apologies for the grammatical/spelling errors]
Disclaimer: I claim no ownership of the characters that are implied in this story. Those rights are reserved to the WB & Amy-Sherman Palladino & Gilmore Girls Productions.
He writes her letters that he will never send.
Tell-all letters that bares everything, answers all questions, and leaves him vulnerable and exposed. They are letters that offers no room for explanations or excuses. He writes her letters that will consequently be consumed by the fire from his fireplace.
(They leave no trace of anything.)
He dreams of her often, and the dream is always the same.
It is a beautiful, impossible fantasy that provides no closure, but brings backs the heartache every time. One would think this to be a horrible way to live, but he doesn't. He loves these dreams—relishes and craves for it—it is a hunger that he can never satisfy.
He both hates and loves these lovely nightmares.
It is the only thing he can have of her.
Everything else is a painful, whispering memory that reminds him of the past.
At least in these dreams, he knows that it is only fantasy. At least in these dreams, he knows that he will never remember what happened in the morning. There is no trace of them. Nothing at all.
But the past … the past remains. Memories are the remnants of days he'd rather forget. They are the stains that refuse to come out. They are the voices that he cannot help but hear. They are the reminders of a past that he cannot escape.
He wants to destroy them.
These inescapable, cursed memories.
He wants to burn them from his mind.
He wants to forget.
From forgetting, to burning, to ashes.
Late in the night, he writes her letters that reveal everything and leaves no room for closure. They always start out the same …
I miss you.
They always end the same way too.
I love you.
And they'll always end up going to the same place. Always into the fire, into the flames, and coming out as ashes. Ashes, ashes, we all fall down.