O.o I haven't posted a real chapter since August. I feel really bad because I made you wait that long and then I give you this pathetic spit of a chapter. It's really short and to be honest nothing really happens.

I did the revisions on the previous chapters, who those of you who are not first time readers, I didn't change much, I just revised it and added a bit here and there, and chapter 8 I added stuff to so yeah, I'm not sure if it actually got posted though because nothings loading and everything is being slow, if theres kissin' in it then it's the new version.

Anyways the reason why this chapter is short is because I need help with a decision so yeah the choices are at the botton author's note. This chapter probably sucks, but I'm an insomniac, I haven't slept, I'm sick, and I'm in a bad mood so whatever.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

I got quite a few reviews, so I'm not going to go through them but I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed. -hands everyone a cookie-


Chapter 9- Guilt Trip

The hospital room was dark and quiet, only the sounds of the steady beeping of the life support machine and the raspy breathing of the black haired teen could be heard.

Kai sat in a chair at the side of the bed and gazed solemnly at the unconscious neko-jin. 'This never should have happened'

He let out an aggravated sigh and placed his head in his hands. It had been three days since the confrontation with Boris; Rei went intocardiac arrest on the way to the hospital and almost died. His heart had stopped for a few moments and the doctors said it had been a miracle that they had managed to resuscitate him. But even so he had slipped into a coma not too long after.

Even though the doctors had said that he was out of an immediate danger, his condition was still pretty bad and there was no sign of his heath improving.

Tyson and the others had come and visited Rei earlier but they had left not long ago, leaving Kai with him seeing as he had been the only one there and knew the full extent of the story.

The Russian hadn't told the others about the rape, and didn't show any intention of doing so. It was the last thing he needed.

Kai absently wiped away a tear that was creeping down his tattooed cheeks, then reached out and gently brushed away a stray strand of ebony hair that had fallen across Rei's features without really realizing it.

He sighed again and gently grasped Rei's hand, holding it in his own. They didn't hold their usual warmth.

'It's all my fault.'

He thought; he didn't except the neko-jin to ever forgive him if he woke up…if he woke up.

The thought of Rei never waking up caused a pain in his chest. 'Don't be stupid…'

He angrily pushed the thought into the back of his mind. 'Of course he'll wake up'

He didn't want to think of anyone dying, especially not Rei, he had already had his share of deaths in his lifetime.

"Please wake up soon, Rei."

The plea fell upon deaf ears.

Kai couldn't stand the atmosphere anymore; he gave Rei's hand one last squeeze before letting go and slowly getting up from the chair. His legs were stiff and sore from sitting for so long.

"I'm going for a walk."

He mumbled to the unconscious form on the bed, he knew Rei probably couldn't hear him but he didn't care.

Kai closed the door behind him; the light hit his eyes like the headlights of a freight train in the dark tunnel, it stung his eyes and made it almost impossible to see. 'I guess that's what you get for being in the dark for so long'

He waited until his eyes recovered before he began making his way down the hospital corridor.

"Are you leaving Mr. Hiwatari?"

He walked by a nurse that had been attending to Rei for the last couple of days. "Just for a walk."

"I'll take care of him while your gone."

She smiled and continued to push a cart full of medical supplies down the hall. He approached the main entrance of the hospital and pushed on the metal bar of the door. The freezing cold wind attacked him as soon as he stepped outside, making his scarf whip around him violently.

He felt so helpless. A feeling that had become all too familiar from his childhood at the abbey.

He sighed deeply once again, inhaling the cool air, he had been doing that a lot lately.

Lost deep in his own thoughts, he didn't pay attention to where his feet were taking him, nor did he care, but he soon found himself at a bridge. He stopped and leaned over the railing, gazing at the river. (A/N: No he's not suicidal... at least not yet.O.o)

Guilt was stabbing into him to the point where he felt as though he would throw up. "Rei should have never been hurt, he shouldn't have been involved. If only…If only I hadn't run away then he would be fine. Damn it! It's all my fault!"

He slammed his fists against the cold metal railing. Tears started to spill from his eyes.

"I shouldn't have run!"

Boris had been right. He was weak; his friendship with the blade breakers had made him soft. 'All that training and for what grandfather? In the end what did it accomplish?'

He thought bitterly. He buried his head in his hands; he absolutely hated this feeling. He felt so weak, so helpless. "It's all my fault…"

He repeated through his hands. "You know, Kai. You should really stop blaming yourself."

Came a voice from behind him.


Kai: Was that suppose to be a cliffy?

Rogue: Not particularly...

Rei: A coma! Cardiac arrest! The hell! I'm so unloved...

Rogue-pat pat- Anyways, I know it's pathetic, nothing happened, it's short and it just sucked. I ended it there so I could at least have a start for my next chapter, hopefully it won't take another 6 months.

Kai and Rei: Damn right it won't, you lazy bum. -glare- We should tie you to your chair and make you type, wahahaha!.

Rogue: O.o But I have school!

Kai: Your kidding right? You hate school.

Rogue: Well...right...but only if I get a shit load of coffee-hugs a number of caffine items- Okay, to the point, I'm planning on writing a sequal to this.

Kai: Surprise, surprise

Rogue: But I have no idea how to end this so here are the options, we know Rei is in a coma, now I didn't really want to kill him, but that of course is an option for you guys to choose if you want.

Rei: What! You're kidding right? Don't kill me! I'm too pretty to die!

Rogue: Sorry kitten, so yeah choices.

1)Kill him

2)Keep him in a coma after the story ends

3)Make him wake up before the story ends

Rogue: So yeah, review, vote, whatever. I could probably write a pretty good story if I kill of Rei, not like I want to though, that would be bad if I killed off my only pairing. I think I might be able to do it with either of the choices too. Now you all know how bad I am at writing stories, so if I can't think of anything with the choice you guys picked I will take an alternative but I don't think that'll be an issue.

Rei: She's going to kill me-cries-

Rogue: I didn't say that! It's up to the reviewers.

Rei-sobs-

Rogue: Kai, go hug your boyfriend!

Kai: He's not my boyfriend!

Rogue: He is because I said so! Anyways the dude who's talking to Kai, he's going to play a big role in the rest of this story and in the sequal, it's not really a secret who he is. But yeah, big gigante role. -nods- Okay, shutting up, I'm posting this before I pass out. Don't forget to review! I need decisions, I suck at making decisions.