Disclaimer: we obviously don' t own them. SO SUE US! Ü Oh and we also do not own the line 'ei what's up doc?' and other things you recognize but Nienna owns the nicknames and insults and we both own the randomness

Nienna: We are obviously TwO people from the explanation of the disclaimer

Uruviel: Elôw!

Nienna: I'm the official spokesperson and RuVie's the official typewriter person whatever...

Uruviel: So on with our story!

Nienna: We are now off to huggle the hobbits and an elf!!

Uruviel: beware this contains random thoughts! Ü

Nienna: Just to tell you Jessie's the smart, annoying, hyper and weird one!!

Uruviel: And Nadi's the smart, hyper and cursing one plus she has the common sense! ========

How the freakin' hell did we end up HERE?!

Chapter 1: Meeting Fro Fro and Legolasiel

Nadine and Jessie were playing in Jessie's room. "where the fuck is my fucking coat?" she cursed. "and to think you were the mature one..." Jessie muttered under her breath. "what the fuck did you say?" Nadi asked "Nothing..." Jessie replied then Nadi turned around "It's just that you keep saying the fuck word..." Jessie muttered to herself "that I heard...I'm just into it today...it's better than last week I kept saying—"Nadi told her but Jessie cut her off "Yes, Yes I know and I don't wanna bring back the memory!" Jessie replied, then a small moth [thingy] landed in Jessie's hand. "hello little moth thingy!" Jessie said "Reminds me of the fucking buggy game..." Nadi told her "Yeah me too!" Jessie replied "This is buggy! Buggy say hi! Buggy go fly! Clap for buggy! Oops buggy died..." they chanted then Jessie realized she squished the bug "You fucking idiot..." Nadi told her then the wall started to crack and a big eagle appeared.

"what the...?" the two asked each other. After seconds of staring blankly into space Jessie perked up "HI GWAHIR!" she screamed that Nadi swore the neighbors were now looking at the humongous eagle that made a LARGE hole in the wall.

Then Jessie started climbing 'Gwahir' "What the fuck are you trying to do?" Nadi asked "Ride Gwahir then ride into space then get faster than the speed of sound, slowness and light and end up in the dimension of –"Nadi could tell she was going to start a LONG talk." Ya whatever...the speed of slowness?" she asked "It's possible! I'm more smarter than you but you have the common sense so believe me if I say speed of slowness, and yes I may be crazy but I sure am smart!" Jessie stated, "Uh huh..." Nadi muttered then started to climb 'Gwahir' then Jessie started to screech stuff to 'Gwahir' "What the fuck are you doing now?" Nadi asked, "I learned how to speak 'Eagle'" she told her. "Riiight..." Nadi said

Soon Jessie stopped screeching and Nadi noticed the neighbors either clutching their ears or passing out earplugs the she told them "YOU'LL GET USED TO IT!" then 'Gwahir' started to flap his wings then fly "You know what it's unusual for me to like flying but afraid of heights!" Jessie told Nadi "Believe me you are very, very unusual!" Nadi told Jessie without actually saying a curse!

When they reached the stratosphere Jessie just screamed randomly "I can see Korea from here!" "Why the hell Korea?" Nadi asked "I'm a random person and Korea is very random in my case..." she told Nadi then her ears popped then she started doing the stupid maneuver she was taught in scuba diving then soon 'Gwahir' went faster until they were faster than the speed of sound, slowness and [finally] the speed of light then they entered a shiny purple thingy. "ohh...my favorite color" Nadi said "oh... that's your favorite color?" Jessie asked "Jessie we have been friends since...since grade 1 it was my favorite color ever since, 'I think I'm gonna hurl." Jessie said. Nadi glared at her "ehehehe...just joking! ü" Jessie replied then inside the purple shiny glittery [now it was] there were flying pigs, "YEAH! I KNEW THERE WERE FLYING PIGS!" Jessie screamed then there was a walking, talking gingerbread man, "that is soooo Shrek1 and 2!" Nadi screamed[at no one in particular] then the room started to become filled with random things including cows that walk on two legs and were color pink with blue and purple spots and a dog that had a bath robe that drank tea and had a British accent and a cat that had blonde hair with highlights and acted as a supermodel. Then 'Gwahir' stopped abruptly which sent them flying into a piece of paper [in Jessie's case] then into 2 chairs facing a Frenchman. "Makeovers!" the French guy squealed. Then he started working on them then when they both faced the mirror Jessie didn't have the brown eyes instead they were green and her hair was now long, very wavy but they were still brown with brown highlights instead of what used to be shoulder length and Nadi had blue eyes instead of brown and long blonde hair instead of long brown hair "AGH! WE LOOK LIKE FUCKING MARY SUES!"[no offense to Mary Sue writers especially to Nadi] they both screamed and Jessie amazingly said a bad word... then the chairs that they were sitting on made them fall somewhere else and while they fell their clothes floating and they fell through it then they were wearing it "Cool... breeches..." Jessie told herself then they fell down then landed on the ground but amazingly it didn't hurt but they did pass out though...

=back to the French guy=

The French guy realizes the chair that Jessie was sitting in was the chair Nadi was supposed to sit in and Nadi sat on Jessie's chair then he thinks for a second and scratches his head... "What the hell..." he says and walks away

=Nadi's POV=

Nadi started to stir then she woke up. "What the...?" she muttered as she sat up. "Excuse me..." she looked all around. "Down here" she looked down to see a small boy she suddenly realized that she was in Middle-Earth, judging by the curly hair, hairy feet... "Can you help me? I'm kinda lost..."Nadi said "Hello, I'm Frodo Baggins of the Shire. If you want to know, you are in the Shire or the Old Forest" he said "What are you doing in the Old Forest then? Aren't the hobbits afraid of the forest?" Nadi asked "No actually I was dared to go here by my two cousins and get a twig from a tree with only one leaf and a nest and there's one over there but I can't quite reach it..." he told her and Nadi looked up and saw the twig "can you help me?" Frodo asked "Sure" she answered and she reached over to the branch. In a matter of seconds she got what Frodo needed "Thanks! you sure are tall lady--" he said. "...Uruviel..." she said with the first name that got into her mind. She didn't feel safe sharing personal info with strangers. "Lady Uruviel" Frodo said then a minute of silence "Do you want to meet my cousins and my gardener?" he asked, Nadi started to giggle then she said "OK" then they made their way out of the forest

=Jessie's POV=

Jessie woke up to find herself lying down in the front of a really big spider then she started talking in Spider? Then the spider hissed then Jessie hissed back then she got a stick then started whacking the spider then soon the spider got scared when she poked one of it's eyes then it ran away[crawled away, crying mommy in Spider...] "So this is how Mirkwood looks like" Jessie told herself because she knew Mirkwood had very big spiders then a group of elves came then the leader asked the others "Mammen ha? (Where is it?)" "ha noro (It ran)" Jessie told them "Pedich I lam edhellen? (Do you speak elvish)" he asked "If I didn't I wouldn't understand you then!" Jessie told them "Telich (Come)" he told Jessie "Wait" Jessie stopped him "Iston le? (Do I know you?)" she asked him then he replied "Law (No)" then they went out of the forest into a big, big palace that Jessie had no idea that Mirkwood looked like that

=Nadi's POV=

Frodo [finally] finished introducing her to his cousins and gardener. "did you know, miss Uruviel, that you are an elf?" Sam asked. "Apparently...YES" Nadi said, really pissed off from all of their questions. 'thank god that I'm an LoTr fan...' she thought then Sam asked "Can you speak elvish?" "Ya! Speak elvish!" Pippin gestured. "uh...no..." Nadi stammered. They all gasped. "Now I've seen everything! What next? A hobbit speaking elvish?" Merry asked [Nienna looks at readers and arches her eyebrow smirking] [Uruviel glares at Nienna] "Hey can we go to Bag End?" Nadi asked "Of course..." Frodo said then Nadi smirked "not" Nadi scowled "It would take a day to get there, I'm living here at Crick Hollow!" Frodo said "Oh... What year is it?" Nadi asked "3018" Frodo replied 'Oh... so we're going to leave for Bree soon...' Nadi thought then later they went to the Green Dragon and Merry and Pippin were singing at the top of their lungs. Nadi accidentally ,hit her head when she was going to get more and ,more drunk. "I see dancing hobbits around me...hey fro fro...ei what's up doc?" she muttered. 'then she went out then...

=Jessie's POV=

Jessie stole a pony from the stables and that pony happened to be Legolasiel's [she called him a lot of names when they got there ex. Lego, Legoboy, Legolasiel, Leggy, Leggyboy, Leggy Peggy, Greenleaf Greenleaf, Legolas Legolas, stupid Greenleaf, Happy Person (Gay Person) and Leggings and her favorite insult to him was "Why do you wear leggings, Leggings?] as Legolasiel's pony trotted away...and went towards Bree

=Nadi's POV=

Nadi was asked to sing a song and she sang the first thing that came into her head "We're black sheep and really black eggs! Drink up me 'earties yo ho! Yo ho! Yo ho! Yo ho! A pirate's life for me!" she sang then soon the hobbits started singing the song over and over again then soon it was time to go "Good night lads" Rosie told Sam and Frodo as they went out then Nadi heard from behind "Good night oh sweet maiden of the golden ale" and she rolled her eyes and kept walking.

[Fast forward because yeah you know the routine]

in Farmer Maggots crop... "CARROTS!" Merry, Pippin and Nadi said as they saw the carrots then they started gathering the carrots then they heard Farmer Maggot and his mutant dogs then they started to run

[Fast forward once again to Bree]

"Excuse me" Frodo asked "Oh hello little masters and miss if you'd like we have little hobbit sized rooms for you and elf sized rooms for the lass" Mr. Butterbur said "We are looking for Gandalf have you seen him?" Frodo cut in "Gandalf? That fool of a wizard as the other hobbit lass said? Haven't seen him in six months..." Mr. Butterbur replied "What do we do now?" Sam asked "And who's the hobbit lass?" Pippin asked "I have a very good idea who would say it..." Nadi told them "Excuse me Mr. Butterbur, may I ask where is the hobbit lass?" Nadi asked Mr. Butterbur "She's singing at the top of the table over there, she's been here for about three days already" he told Nadi then she went to the table. "Jessie?!" Nadi pulled her of the table. "Jessie you are acting like a fucking MARY SUE!" Nadi told her then "You call this Mary Sueish?" she asked then got on the table once more then she danced while singing "Go Jessie it's your birthday! Shake your booty now!!! HEY! HEY!"



Nienna: OK that's the end of our unusually short chapter!

Uruviel: WTF?! It was three pages long with more than 2 000 words you old fart...

Nienna: I'm not old and definitely not a fart! You're just jealous that I came up with the plot and you didn't!

Uruviel: Oh whatever...but no one can do this you old FART! Ü mwhahahaaahahaa!!! Ü


Uruviel: old fart, old, fart, Nienna is an old fart! old fart, old fart, Nienna is an old fart!

Nienna: Shall I spill this to the world?

[Nienna shows piece of paper and Uruviel's eyes turn big]

Uruviel: You wouldn't dare...unless you want me to show this...ü

[Uruviel holds up a piece of paper and Nienna's eyes grow big]

Nienna: Fine I'm an old fart and you're the old coot

Uruviel: Fine whatever you old fart

Nienna: Fine just tell the reviewers to review you old coot

Uruviel: PLEASE R/R!