A/N: My first attempt at a R/Hr... hope you think it's good though. Help me improve, R&R. :)
Summary: Jealous is the feeling Hermione is going for. Well, to make Ron jealous anyway. It would've been a smart idea, if Ron hadn't decided to do the same thing.
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters; they all belong to J.K. Rowling. This was also made only for fun and is purely fictional.
"Hermione..." Harry sighed exasperatedly as she tugged on his sleeve. "Explain the logic behind this again?"
Hermione huffed, obviously annoyed. Her day was not going well. Or rather, one person was making her day rubbish. She and Ron had just had a row—again. Over what? Well, she couldn't exactly recall. Harry was not making it any easier on her by being difficult. Obviously.
"I'll explain if you just come along." Hermione's voice was overflowing with agitation, and, as the hall was completely empty while everyone was at dinner, Harry was quite nervous. He knew quite well that she wasn't a pretty sight after a row with Ron.
They trudged down flights of stairs, and Harry decided to hold his tongue just in case she gave a second thought to biting his head off. He didn't know exactly where they were headed, but instinct told him they were close to the Potions Lab. True enough, she stopped right outside one of the classrooms and pushed him against the wall. She let out a frustrated growl as Harry tried his hardest not to flinch.
"That git! The insolent little prat!" Hermione started pacing in front of him, and it was making his head spin. "I cannot believe he said that!" She let out another frustrated sound and started pulling at her hair.
"'Mione, don't lose your temper. You know Ron..." Harry's attempt at calming her down was proving to be useless. "He's very, er," Harry tried to search for the right word. He didn't want to be the one to insult his best friend, but he knew if he sided with Ron, Hermione was likely to have a stroke. "Very... tactless, sometimes?"
Hermione stared at him as if he was standing in front of her in ridiculously girly undergarments. Harry managed an apologetic smile but it didn't calm her. "Sometimes?" She asked. She stared at him incredulously. "Harry, he's been tactless since first year... maybe even before that, Lord knows I would know." She threw her arms in the air. "And I am very thankful that I haven't known him that long." She shook her head in exasperation. "Very thankful." She added as an after thought.
To Harry, this whole ordeal was a little over dramatic. Of course, he didn't have the nerve to insult Hermione further as this was already proving to be a difficult situation. He really didn't think one teeny comment about her would get her in this right state. But he wasn't thick. The comment, on second thought, was quite bad. And though Harry's loyalty should have been with Ron, he couldn't bring himself to toss the comment away.
"Good Evening, Harry!" Hermione said cheerily as she came up to their place. She had just come from Arithmancy while Harry and Ron slept through Divination. "Hello Ron!"
Ron looked up from his pork chops and mumbled with his mouth full. Hermione looked at him perplexed and said, in a very good imitation of Mrs. Weasley, "Ron, chew your food. Really, you act like a three year old."
"I trust you had a good class then?" Harry asked, referring to her mood when she had greeted them.
"Mm-hmm." Hermione nodded, spooning some potatoes onto her plate. Ron finally managed to swallow that huge wad of food in his mouth.
"Cant have been that great. You were late for dinner." He said.
"Oh, that wasn't class." She said looking up from her plate. "Parvati, Lavender, Ginny and I had a little chat in the room." Ron dropped the spoon half way to his mouth and turned so he was in full view of her.
"What were you chatting about?" He asked interestedly. Hermione gave him a small shrug.
"Girly things..." She trailed off.
Ron burst into a chuckle as Harry kicked him under the table. "Ow! Harry!" He started rubbing the part of his leg that Harry had kicked, but it was too late, as Hermione had heard his beginning chuckle.
Without pausing to look up, Hermione asked, "What's amusing Ron?" In a half light-hearted, half confused manner.
Ron gave another laugh. "Girly things? But Hermione, you're hardly a girl. You're just, well, Hermione." Ron finished with a shrug. Harry gave him a warning glare, but Ron obviously didn't catch it, as he went back to eating his mash and steak. Hermione, however, caught every word. And as Harry was preparing himself for the outburst, he thought that was the most unfortunate thing in the world.
"Are you saying," Hermione said in a slow, very deadly tone. "That I'm not a girl to you, Ronald?"
Ron, who had, just minutes before, won the "Thicker than a boulder" award by his first statement, was proving that he could indeed top his previous bout of stupidity.
"Well, yeah." He said with another shrug. "I mean," A quirky little smile came on his face. "Girls usually read magazines, and chat about boys, and look pretty..." And he went back to his food. Everyone in hearing range had turned to watch the scene, and Harry was quietly beating himself in as he watched Ron dig himself deeper and deeper.
Everyone watched as Hermione's scowl became dirtier and dirtier by the millisecond, and they were all ready to see Ron get his face punched in. The girls especially. But apparently, Hermione had had enough. She got up from the table so quickly, the jug of milk spilled. She grabbed her bag and said "Harry, lets go." And dragged him huffily out of the Great Hall while everyone else looked on.
"And so, you are going to date me." Hermione finished with conviction. This was the only part he had caught. He looked at her and blinked.
"I'm going to what?" He said. He was convinced he had heard her wrong. She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her tummy.
"Date me, go out with me, take me to dinner, bring me flowers and candy, dress up in nice clothes, ring any bells?" She asked sarcastically and moved forward to knock on his skull. He cocked his head to the side and looked at her weirdly.
"Are you certain you aren't on anything, Hermione?" He asked. She sighed and dropped her arms, looking at Harry frustrated.
"Bottom line," She said in a threatening tone. "From now on, I'm interested in you." She said. She turned on her heel and marched off in the direction of her next class, leaving Harry to process the event. He figured he should do the processing on the way to class, as his next subject was Defense. 'That's what they need here.' He thought. 'Defense against Raving Mad Girls...'