A Harry Potter FanFiction...

As Thin as Paper

By: kurokitenshii89

Betta-reader: Balthazor66

25/03/2004

Genre: Romance/Angst at first, but Romance/Humor later.

Rating: PG-13

Disclaimer: Harry Potter does not belong to me, but to JK Rowling and Bloomsbury. I am not making a single penny out of this fic.

Timeline: Happens shortly after Sirius' death (FOUL death...) when Harry has just began his sixth year at Hogwarts.

Summary: Some people used to say that [The distance between love and hatred is as thin as paper...]. Is that true? Does that occur to our hero Harry Potter and his second worst enemy Draco Malfoy? Shounen-ai. One-shot. DxH pairing. R&R please!

A/N: My first Harry Potter fanfic attempt (Not really first...but, well...the first one that is posted then)! I was reading someone else's fanfic titled Draco Veritas (It's an AWESOME fic! But then...it is not included in FF.net...Ppl who want to read can just email me and I'll be glad to give u the URL! I kept it in my favorites!) and suddenly I want to write an DracoxHarry fic (That's right! Our lovely pairing!). I used to think that such pairing is soo...weird...but Draco Veritas changed my view !!! So...here we go...

Warning: This fic contains shounen-ai, or BOY-to-BOY fluffy relationship! If you are disgusted by it or do not like it PLEASE don't read! I don't want to be kicked off FF.net...

A/N2: I am not coming from a country that has English as their mother tongue (In other words, I'm not a native speaker and I suck in English) so please have mercy at my bad English, especially grammar mistakes and inappropriate words (words used not in the correct places (U know...that might be the result of using thesaurus)). And also...some OOCness might occur...

[As Thin as Paper] is a one-shot, unless people want me to continue this fic.

------ Means a change of POV (Harry's to Malfoy's, and vice versa)

-------------------------------------------------------------------

I felt cold.

I felt lonely.

Isolated.

People around me were laughing, smiling happily and having fun with their friends. They might wave at me...telling me that they supported me, but they never really know what was ahead, waiting for them, like snake waiting to eat their preys...

I shrugged.

No one. No one knew what I feel; no one knew what I should face. Well, aside from Dumbledore of course. He knew everything. He knew everything but fear. That was why sometimes I want to pound on him, making him shiver in fear at least once, but he never. He was always calm.

Who was there for me to share my fear? To share the burden of being the Dark Lord's one and only person he once had admitted equal? To be his victim or villain?

I shrugged again before I looked up to the table, my pie untouched. The bell that signed the end of lunch would ring soon and I hadn't been eating anything since the morning, but do I care?

No.

The tight feeling in my stomach made me unable to feel anything but sadness, fear and anger.

I could tell that Hermione and Ron looked at me with worried looks on their faces. They exchanged glances at each other before my red haired friend opened his mouth and spoke. "What's after lunch?" he asked rigidly.

Hermione put down her fork and looked at her timetable. "Double Potion," she answered with a slightly irritated voice.

Yeah, right. A meeting with that Snivellus is just what I need right now...

Ron sighed loudly. "Well...I guess we better pack up now... You know what would happen if we ever come to his class one second late," he said, sitting up, slightly looking at me with even worrier look on his face. Hermione stood up too, and the two waited, as if like urging me to at least take one bite off the already cold piece of food in front of me.

I did nothing except standing up and flung my bag over my shoulder. The two looked at each other again before they decided to start walking.

We walked down the corridor in complete silence. My gaze was down to my feet. I tried walking as far away as possible from them.

And then we heard it, buzzes of noises coming from the other end of the corridor, familiar voices trailing from it.

"So it's Potty, Weasel and their beloved mudblood friend!" said the unmistakably voice of Draco Malfoy, a Slytherin blond that had been my worst enemy since I first step foot on this school, "how is it, your summer holiday with fellow mudbloods and losers?" his eyebrow furrowed dangerously.

Hermione paid no attention as Ron stepped in front of me, as if trying to protect me. "It is nothing of your business, Death-Eater's son," hissed the Gryffindor's prefect angrily.

The blond raised one slender eyebrow precariously. "Oh?" he said shortly, "well, I should say thank you for the title, Weasel, the King,"

Crabbe and Golye snickered as some of the Slytherin girls behind the blond began giggling like mad. Ron's ear started to turn red. He stepped back and threw a hatred look on Malfoy before he fell silent.

My enemy smirked a victory smile as he walked his way towards me. He stopped right in front of me and forced to look at my eyes. "Hey, potty, how do you feel, losing your best puppy?"

In an instant, Ron and Hermione glared at the blond, telling him to shut up. "Malfoy, that is really not your business down there,"

The boy in front of me ignored my brunette best friend and kept on smiling. "You must have felt sad...right?" he began to pace around me, "after all, it was your fault that your beloved dog died," he spat the word like it was a poison on the tip of his tongue.

I stopped dead.

Hermione and Ron began to look panicked. "Malfoy!" she shot a dirty look to him before she turned at me and spoke. "Don't take mind him, Harry, he's just angry at you because you made his father go to Azkaban,"

Too late...I laughed pathetically in my mind. Sirius...my godfather...the only person whom I used to share my burdens...my pains...he had died...because of me...yes...because of me... If I hadn't believe on that stupid dream and went to the Department of Mystery he couldn't have died...he would still beaming at me with his once handsome face, his hair falling messily onto his face... My throat had suddenly become dry. I felt like choking...

My enemy looked down at me and smirked even bigger. My best friends began to panic even more. "Harry!?" called Hermione worriedly when I hadn't budge at all.

Malfoy walked closer to me. "Now, when I come to think of it..." he trailed with an amused voice, "it's also your fault that your mudblood mother and show off father died, isn't it? If you weren't born...they might still be alive, living happily..."

"Malfoy, shut up!" shouted Ron as Hermione tried calling me back to earth. It was useless. All I could hear was my pathetic laugh. If I weren't born...if I were not the person in that stupid prophecy... if my parent had had born other children than me...

Tears...I felt tears running down my cheeks. I lifted my hand to touch my face. It was wet.

Malfoy mused. "Ooh, look who is our cry baby now," he said as he looked down at me. "Harry?" called Hermione with an even worrier tone. Ron turned around at me. "Harry? C'mon, mate! It's just Malfoy and his rubbishes!! You know it's not true!!"

My mind laughed even harder. Not true, was it? I was weird...how could I let myself bothered with Malfoy's words?? Not true, was it?? Too bad...Ron...this one was true...I'm just a burden to my beloved. They sacrificed their lives for me: a good for nothing, one to be murdered by the Dark Lord Voldemort...

Tears came streaming down my cheek even faster than before as I slumped to the floor, sitting helplessly. My heart ached like hell... It hurt so much...I felt like I was stabbed by a very sharp knife over and over again... the pain was too big...I felt like coughing blood...

And it really did. I coughed really loudly and blood came sprouting out from my mouth, staining the marble floor. Hermione and Ron looked at me with wide eyes. Some of the people who were laughing stopped laughing and looked at me with terrors in their eyes. My best friends ran to me for my aid. "Harry, are you okay??" asked Hermione, panicked.

I panted as I coughed again and sent more blood to the marble floor. Hermione, of course I'm not okay...you can just see from my look...I can't believe you are my genius friend...

The laughter died, replaced by mutterings of the people.

After something as long as, what, I did not know, eternity. Snivellus came out and barked at us, "Well, well?? Why aren't you in class now, all of you?? 10 points of Gryffindor and Slytherin!! Now, all of you go inside the class!"

"But, sir!" Hermione called, "Harry is not feeling well!!"

Snape's eyes twitched. "What is it now, Potter??" he growled as he looked down at me. As a coincidence, I coughed even louder than before and stained my own robe with my blood. Oh, boy...I must have looked bad...I could see how the twitch in Snape's face was gone and replaced by...worried look?? My consciousness was running low...I couldn't hear anything else from him and the next thing I knew, I was already carried by Ron and Dean to somewhere I did not know...

-----------------------------------------------

I saw it when that Weasel and that mudblood boy came and carried that fainted Potter to the Hospital Wing, his body limp, blood trailing from his thin lips. I stared down wide-eyed at the bloodstain on the floor. What have I done?? How can those two statements effect him that much?? The Potter I knew was not such a weak boy like that...

When the mutterings died, Pansy Parkinson gave a high-pitched laugh and pointed at where Potter used to lie. "Look how weak the Potty boy is!" she said, people around them following her laugh.

I turned at them and gritted my teeth. "SHUT UP!" I shouted, leaving them blank looks on their faces, "especially you, Parkinson..." I whispered dangerously. She fell quiet instantly. As Professor Snape came back from the end of corridor, we entered the dungeon and started the lesson. Oh, Potter...I'm so sorry...

-------------------------------------------------

It was night. After I faked going up to bed to my two dumb friends I went out from bed and walked out from the dungeon to the Hospital Wing. I swore lightly as my feet crept down the corridor, trying not to make any sound as possible. Time was being a bitch. It was very slow. I kept on glancing at the clock during the lessons. I couldn't wait for the day to end. I wanted to meet Potter...I wanted to apologize...I did not know how big the effect of my words could be.

I reached the Hospital Wing and I peeked inside from the window. Madam Pomfrey was asleep. I slowly took out my wand and tap the doorknob lightly. "Alohomora," I whispered. The door creaked open. I entered the room quickly and searched over the beds. Potter was sleeping soundly on the bed furthest away from Madam Pomfrey's office. I sighed quietly in relief as I sat on the chair beside the bed.

The moon was shining over the window and hit Potter's face, highlighting his features with mystical lights. I gazed at his face, his thin lips, his smooth cheeks, his scar; the clear green eyes underneath his eyelids, his spicy scent and his messy hair. I smiled as I ruffled my hand lightly on his dark hair. Potter was beautiful...my secret crush was... I sighed lightly. So far, noone had ever known it yet. I had been laying my eyes on the beautiful bloke since the first day of school. It pained me to look at him going out with the stupid Ravenclaw seeker... I couldn't tell anybody... My father would disown me with disgrace once he knew this! And I couldn't tell him either...I could stand his hatred looked at me, but I he looking at me with disgust of finding out that I was homosexual, and more over, my object of lust was he himself.

I shook myself off the thought and could feel myself laughed pathetically from it. Irony, wasn't it? I, Draco Malfoy, son of an honored Death Eater, carrier of pure blood, the person whom Potter set enemy with since our first day of Hogwarts, actually loved Harry Potter, the "Boy who Lived", Dark Lord's worst enemy, and carrier of half-blood.

All the teases and humiliations were just a cover to my emotions. Well, sometimes I did them to enjoy his reaction of course...his beautiful green orbs shone when he was angry...but I did not like it when he chose to do muggle fighting with me... The scar hurt, hurt worst than any ordinary scar...

But most of all, I hated it when my words, the words my foul mouth blurted out, took a toll on him and hurt him...like today...

I broke my thought with a silent sigh as I glanced back at him. Dear Potter...I'm so sorry, I thought as I ran my hand on his dark, messy hair again...

-------------------------------------------------

Darkness. Darkness was around me. I couldn't see anything. Just voices. Familiar voices.

Of him...

I wanted to open my eyes. I wanted to reach out my hand and hug him, my lovely godfather. I wanted him to beam at me and ruffle my hair...

My eyes fluttered open. I could feel someone running his or her hand on my hair. I loved the feeling. It was calming...soothing my soul. I wanted to grab the hand. I half wished that it were Sirius...I half wished that the encounter with the Death Eaters on last June were just a nightmare...that I would woke up finely and saw him sitting by the bed, smiling at me...

Slowly but surely, as I opened my eyes, the darkness blurred away and light began to enter my sight. The person whom I saw first shocked me.

Draco Malfoy.

It was not Sirius...or my father...or my mother... It was him.

My second worst enemy,

He withdrew his hand straight away, aware at the fact that I was conscious again. I, with all my might, tried to sit up, leaning on the bed. My hand racked the dresser beside me to seek for my glasses and put them on. I blinked.

The person was undoubtedly Draco Malfoy.

He looked startled before he threw his gaze out of me, like he was caught doing something wrong. Very wrong.

I shrugged.

"Why are you here?"

-----------------------------------------------

"Why are you here?" he asked me, his voice echoing in my ears. Damn it. I didn't know how to answer this question. S-should I tell him...?? ...No...he would look at me with disgust...no...

After something as long as like, eternity, I stood up, looked at him and put on a proud and arrogant mask to my face.

"Nothing," I spat with disgusted voice. Heh, I was so good at lying. "Just want to see and coo over how weak you are, Potty, the boy who supposed to match against Dark Lord,"

-------------------------------------------

My heart lurched at the words. So he knew. The blond knew. He must have known that from his father. I placed my hand on my forehead, wiping the sweats, accidentally caressing the scar when doing so. I winced. The scar...that was the mark that Voldemort had once looked at me as equal...

I looked up and saw his arrogant face beaming at me. I shrugged invisibly. "Why did you ran your hand on my hair?" I asked; my voice sounded a bit offended.

His eyes twitched. "What is it, Potty? Don't like me touching your precious hair?" he mused before a disgusted look crossed his face, "I just wanted to know whether you hair is as dirty as your mother's blood."

The usual me would have leapt on him and pounded him to the floor to punch him, but I only shrugged (again) and brought my knees to my chest, sort of curling myself into a tight ball as I wrapped my arms around my knees. I stared aside, trying to look as if I was not bothered.

There was silence.

I could hear Malfoy shifted uneasily with his feet. "So, ...Potty, having a nightmare of you losing your precious dog?" he asked with sarcastic tone.

I clutched my knees even tighter. No...not again... Sirius...my beloved godfather...the only one left for me to lean in this harsh world... If I had learned Occlumancy more seriously...if I hadn't believe on that stupid dream...if I hadn't gone to that Department...

It's your entire fault. A voice mused out redundantly.

You killed him.

I shook hard as I lifted my hands and looked at them. Yes. It was my entire fault...I killed him...

Tears. I could feel tears flowing down my cheeks and I made no attempt to wipe them. I could also feel Malfoy looking at me. Must be with a victory look...or disgusted look...

No...don't look at me like that...don't look at me like the Dursley...I want to be loved...I want to have people supporting me...I want to have people to lean to...

Yeah, and you killed your one and only godfather left.

I felt tremendous pain on my chest. This time I did not feel like coughing blood...I felt like...dying...

-------------------------------------------------------

I glanced at him the moment I said the words. I had no more idea of what to say. Oh, oops...again. I hurt his heart again. I hit myself mentally. Why was I so stupid? Why did I mention that again? Didn't I come here for an apology?? Damn it. Damn my foul mouth and me. Please don't cry...

"The Boy who lived is a cry baby!? What kind of a joke it is?" I snorted, "After killing so many people to save his own neck all he could do was to cry??"

Suddenly, his hand reached out to me and jerked me right in front of him. Yes...at least he made some reaction...

"Malfoy," those glassy emerald eyes of his looked at me with pained expression, "kill me."

Wha-?

--------------------------------------------------------

I waited for an expression, or at least a reaction from him. There was nothing. He gaped at me with his lips slightly open. He must have thought that I was joking. Hell, no. I wanted to die, I really wanted to die. Why should I love when I have noone to stand by my side? The burden and the guilt were going to make me break soon... At least when I die...I could meet my godfather Sirius...and my parents...

"Potter," the boy in front of me said, very unlikely him, "are you insane?"

I continued to look at him. "Hell, no. Malfoy, kill me."

There was a silence between us before he looked at me and laughed sarcastically. "Yeah, right. You want to suicide and it is I to do the dirty work. Very nice of you, Potty," his tone turned derisive again.

I lowered my gaze to his waist and trailed my eyes around it. Very soon, I found what I needed. His wand. My hand went loose from his hand and jerked towards his waist to pull his wand. Very quickly, I pointed the tip of the wand to myself and concentrated on the feeling of hatred. "Avada Kedav-!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"Avada Kedav-!"

No. This couldn't happen. No.

I stretched out my hand to my wand and pulled it hard. The green beam of light missed him by a few inches and hit the wall. I took grip of the wand and put it away. "Stupid!" I was panting. The whole thing was so quick it required more energy than I thought. His reflex was almost perfect. "What are you thinking???" I shot a worried look to him. O-okay. I knew I was so unlike the usual me, but, who cares?

Then that was it. He broke.

Lots of tears streamed down from his beautiful emerald eyes as he tried wildly to snatch my wand again. "Give that to me, Malfoy!" he cried between his sobs, "I want to DIE!"

I glanced over Madam Pomfrey's office. It was still locked. I looked at him again. "Ssssshhh!!" My right hand tried to bring my wand as far as possible from his reach while the other hand tried to push him down. "Potter, that is ridiculous!! You do NOT want to die!" My mask must have slipped away...

After a few moments, he calmed down a bit and slumped down to the bed, both of us were panting, our pajama and our hair stuck out messily all over.

"I want to die..." he said sobbingly, almost whining. I fell quiet. "Why should I live when there's noone who love me???"

I opened my mouth and argued. "There's that Weasel and the mudblood girl!"

He shot me a sarcastic look. "Oh, yeah!?" He sobbed. "They will grow up and have their own family! They'll leave me!! I am to fight Voldemort alone!! To be his murder or murdered! The burden is driving me insane!! AND I HAVE NOONE TO LEAN ON!!!"

I put my hand over his mouth. "SsssshhhhH!!!!" I shooed. It was a wonder how Madam Pomfrey could sleep through this. "Potter..." I tried to say with a calming voice. My mask had truly broken. "There is someone who loves you...who you can lean on..."

"Oh yeah?" he beamed cynically at me, "who?"

I stopped dead. Should I tell him? Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes-.

"Well?" he demanded.

I took a deep breath and sighed. "Me."

--------------------------------------------------------

What!?

I blinked.

Draco Malfoy, pure blood, non-pure blood hater, Voldemort's supporter, had just admitted that he LOVED me?? Who not to mention, has the same gender with him???

Who was he to kid me??

I looked at him wide-eyed. It was there, faint but sure: red hues over his cheeks. He was blushing.

At me!?

Whoa, he must be kidding me.

Is he??

Can someone answer me?????

------------------------------------------------------------

The silence was so uncomfortable. I shrugged and glanced at him. He was shocked. His eyes were wide open.

I didn't blame him...I were shocked to find myself confessing to him too...

The silence continued.

I couldn't bear it anymore. I scratched my head and opened my mouth to speak. "I might not be the most capable person to lean on, but...I do...l-love you..." I could feel heat across my face.

His eyes widened. He opened his mouth a bit. "You're not kidding right? Malfoy?"

A slightly pained expression came across my face. Like I said, I couldn't really blame him. We had spent 5 years thinking that we were enemies; well, at least I thought he had.

"No, ...Harry," I said firmly.

He then broke into tears.

"Liar..." he sobbed, "liar! I have noone!"

My heart ached. How could this be? After I had gathered a lot of courage to finally tell him about this?

"I am telling the truth, Harry!!" I shouted. He kept on sobbing, muttering something like 'Liar,' under his breath. I bit my lips, grabbed his hands and pulled his face to me. The next thing I knew, I had already had my lips on his.

He fell silent.

After a while, I could feel him responding my kiss, leaning up to me. I slowly released my hands from his hands and wrap it around his slim frame while my tongue traced his lips, begging for entry. He seemed hesitant about that but nevertheless granted my plea. My tongue explored his mouth gratefully, enjoying his never ending spicy but sweet taste. We released each other when air was becoming an issue.

He looked calmed, aside from the fact that he was blushing madly. I was the one who made him blush like that. I smirked lightly. He looked up at me with his flushed face. "Malfoy..."

I looked at him. "Draco, please."

He blushed even redder. "Draco," he paused, as if testing the name on his tongue, "why didn't you tell me before...?"

I stopped a beat. "My father..." I trailed off sadly.

Silence. His green eyes looked down sadly at his hands. I knew what was in his thought. How could he lean on to me if it was already hard to talk to each other without people knowing? How could he trust me? I sighed audibly as I ruffled my hand to my hair and took out something from my pocket: a necklace with green stone dangling from it. I handed it to him. He looked at me quizzically.

"Talisman," I answered shortly, "I got it from Knockturn Alley...I have one piece too."

He looked at it with horrified looks. I didn't know why. I'd never even sure whether he had been in that Alley or not...but nevermind.

"Er...what does it do?"

"Mindlink," I answered with a smile on my lips, "wherever we are, as long as we both have each piece, we'll be able to talk and read each other's mind. If you don't want me to read your mind..." he looked offended by the thought of me reading his mind, "then do not bring it with you that particular moment."

He looked down at his necklace and nodded. "I see," he said. I lifted up my hand and showed him the very same green stone on my bracelet. "I've got it also...so you can talk to me any time," I crept closer to him and placed the necklace over his head. "Do you trust me now...?" I whispered to his ears.

"How about Vol-!"

"Ssssshhhh," I shooed calmly, "the one who is fanatical to him is my father, not me. I don't fuss about pure-blood or not...as long as it's not mudblood,"

He shot me a dirty glare before he smiled. He looked like he was happy, like he was freed of all obstacles. He nodded and snuggled to me. "Thanks, Draco..." he paused, "I think I like you too..."

I smiled as I wrapped my arms around him. "Pleasure."

"Draco?"

"Hm?"

"By the way...how did you prepare that Talisman so quickly?"

"Huh? Oh...eh...err...for my father..."

[I've been dying to give that to you...]

He chuckled. "Liar,"

I gave a sheepish grin, as my face blushed very red. Dear, dear...it would be extra hard for me to humiliate him in the future...

"WHAT? Humiliate me??"

"Eh..."

-----------------------------------------------------

You can find comfort in the strangest arms, even the arms of the one who used to belong to your enemy. After all, [The distance between love and hatred is...

As Thin as Paper...]

-The End-

A/N3: Sappy...isn't it??...X3 Especially the ending... and Harry and Draco are SOOO OOC!!!! GAHHHHHHHH X3 REVIEW PLEASE!!!!