(This is my first (and so far my best) attempt at a fic, so if I'm forgetting or ignoring something deemed important, LEAVE ME ALONE! However, if you have any tips or constructive criticism, I'll take it into consideration. Anyway, on with the show!)
It was a silent Spring morning, and Jack was in his home, eating some breakfast with his red-haired teenage son, Miro. They were eating Fish Stew, which Miro was a bit hesitant about.
"Uh... Dad?" Miro begins.
"Yes?" Jack says, looking up from his food to him.
"Why don't we eat cereal like normal people?" Miro asks, prodding at the stew with his fork.
"Because," His father explains. "In my bachelor days, when I was giving out daily gifts to your mother, I found out that she actually liked this stuff. I'm too scared to have anything else, I don't want to take any chances."
"Oh, come on." Miro says, rolling his eyes. "Is Mom really that picky?"
"Yes." Jack says. "She hates flowers, candy, chocolate, wine, necklaces, earrings, bracelets, broaches, puppies, kittens, chibi plush dolls, Soft music, soft musical instruments, chibi plush puppies and kittens, hair products, skin products, cards, letters, and Johnny Depp- I FINALLY FOUND SOMETHING THAT SHE LIKES AND I'M NOT QUITTING ON IT!"
Miro was a bit startled at this outburst. He looks back at his stew.
"Well... I guess it's okay." He finally says. "Still, it's a bit weird for breakfast, isn't it?..."
"If you're so picky, I have some cereal in the basement storage." Jack says. "Go get it yourself."
"We have a basement?" Miro says.
"Yes. It's in a trapdoor under the mat in the living room." Jack explains. "Tons of stuff in there, too. Even a jacuzzi. We don't want the neighbors using it so we hid it. We had some good times... Hey, do you remember asking me when you were little, if your mother and I ever had a bath together?"
Miro suddenly becomes very pale and nervous. His eyebrow twitched and he swallowed.
"...Unfortunately, yes..." He says.
"Well," Jack continues. "Let's just say that if you ever wondered where you came from-"
"LALALALALALALALALA!!!" Miro yells loudly, plugging his ears. "UNWANTED INFORMATION!!!" He runs out the room, yelling loudly and finding the trapdoor to the basement.
Jack smiles to himself. "I've been wanting to do that for years." He chuckles, taking a sip from his glass of milk.
Miro, meanwhile, was climbing down a deep stairwell, still shaking his head in an attempt to flush the image from his mind. He finally finds a door at the end of the stairs and opens it, revealing a small room with another door in it. There was no need to open that door, the pantry was in this room. He had some idea of what was behind that door, anyway. Nothing he was interested in exploring at the moment.
The basement was very dark, and Miro could only barely see his way to the pantry shelf. He pushes away a curtain covering the shelves and comes face to face with dozens of glowing, red eyes.
Meanwhile, Jack was just finishing up his stew when he heard the door outside open.
"Oh, she's back from her walk." He says to himself. He sees the door to the kitchen open and Nami steps in, wearing her usual vest and pants and with her uasual mellow look on her face.
"The trapdoor's open." She says immediately. "You didn't-?"
"Don't worry." Jack reassures her. "The jacuzzi's still a family secret, no ugly, sweaty, smelly neighbors down there using it. It's just Miro."
"Oh, that's good." Nami says, not taking a seat but leaning against the wall. "What's he doing down there?"
"He wanted cereal for breakfast." Jack explains. "I told him to get it."
"Ah," Nami says. "Oh, and... I'm not sure, but I thought I heard scratching down in the basement. It could be infested."
"I haven't heard anything." Jack says. "I'm sure there's nothing to worry about."
Just then, a massive crash is heard, and Miro is seen being flung from the trapdoor and into the wall opposite, right next to the open kitchen door. He falls face-first to the ground with a resounding THUD.
"You were saying?" Nami says, smirking.
Miro pulls himself slowly from the floor, dazed by the concussion. He stumbles slightly but regains his balance by clinging to the wall. He pauses for a few seconds, trying to regain his bearings.
"WE HAVE A PROBLEM." He finally says, suddenly losing his grip on the wall and falling back to the floor in an ungraceful heap.
"Oh, really? I didn't notice." Nami says sarcastically.
"Okay, I get the message!" Jack says in frustration. "I was wrong-"
"Again." Nami adds. Jack ignores it and continues.
"And you were right-"
"Again." Miro says along with Nami, despite having half of his sense knocked out of him.
Jack growls, but manages to contain himself.
"We don't have much time..." Miro says, staggering up to his feet and gripping the doorknob to keep his balance.
"What makes you say that?" Jack asks. "They're not going anywhere, and there's probably not many of them."
"THERE'S A LOT OF THEM!" Miro yells. Suddenly, the sound of thumping is heard. Miro takes action and staggers to the trapdoor, shutting the lid and sitting/collapsing down on it. A series of thuds is heard beneath Miro and the trapdoor is bumped up slightly every time.
"THERE'S A HELL OF A LOT OF THEM!" Miro adds to what he previously said.
Jack and Nami leave the kitchen to get a better view of the situation.
"What are they, and how many is 'a lot', anyway?" Jack asks.
"Mice," Miro says. "And I'm not sure how many, but it's plenty, trust me! I think that the whole bunch of them is being led by three old blind ones!"
"...What does that remind me of?" Jack says, scratching his chin.
"I dunno!" Miro says, interrupted by another hard thump. "The leaders are blind, but you should see how they run!"
An idea suddenly came to Nami's head. She turns to look at Jack.
"Jack, you're a farmer, right?" She says.
"Jee, I hope so." Jack says wonderingly. "Or I might be in trouble for being here for nearly fifteen years."
Nami hit Jack across the face. "Cut the stupid act, yes or no?" She demands.
"Yes." Jack says immediately. "But what does-?"
"What would that make me?" Nami interrupts.
"That would make you... I dunno." Jack says. Nami growls in frustration, raising her hand again.
"Uhh..." Jack says, frantically trying to think. "Uh, the farmer's wife?" He finally says, bracing himself to be hit.
Nami lowers her hand and nods. "Exactly."
Jack sighs in relief.
"So, what's that going to help us with?" He asks.
"I get it!" Miro cuts in, the thumping now quite constant and Miro only barely keeping his balance on the trapdoor. "Mom's the farmer's wife! She can deal with them!"
"I'm still not getting this..." Jack says, scratching his head.
"Read the nursery rhyme, Mr. Dense." Nami says, rolling her eyes. She reaches one hand into her pocket and draws out two large carving knives, putting one in each hand.
"You had those in there the whole time?" Miro says.
"Better safe than sorry." Nami replies. "Now get off of the door and stay out of the way while Mommy does some very brutal Spring cleaning."
Jack steps back as well, and Miro is just about to step off and run.
"You realize that that makes you Mrs. Dense, right?" Jack says, finally thinking up a comeback to Nami's insult. Nami only sighs, and goes over the list in her head of all the other people in the Valley, or the country, that she could've been with. Instead it was Jack that she fell for, and the worst part was, she had to admit that it could've been worse.
"Miro, now." She orders. Miro jumps from the trapdoor, but he was still slightly dizzy so he lands a bit awkwardly, stumbling and falling to the floor.
"That's from your side of the family." Nami states. She then turns her attention back to the trapdoor, which flew open, and a slew of mice skittered out, coming at Nami in a massive horde.
Jack and Miro could do nothing but watch and cringe at the next few moments of unbelievably brutal combat.
"Have you ever seen such a sight in your life?!" Jack says in amazement.
After the dust settled, Nami put away her knives, not a scratch on her. She had cut the tails off of at least thirty mice, including the leaders, and they all retreated out the doors and windows.
"Wow..." Jack says plainly. "I am... SO glad I married you!"
"Way to go, Mom!" Miro cheers.
"It's nothing." Nami says, picking up the strewn tails and throwing them into a trash can.
"I just wonder... why did they all come here? Why not infest Hardy's house or Murrey's hair or some other place where they'd be useful?"
"I don't know..." Jack says slowly.
"Who cares?" Miro says, shrugging it off. "The point is: They're gone, and we don't have to worry about something like this ever happening again."
At that time, in the closet of Miro's room, a faint melody could be heard. A music box, playing by itself, even though no one was there to wind it up. Beside it was the large, stuffed teddy bear Daachan, staring blankly forward like it always did. However, if only for a second, as the music box wound down, the faintest red glow could be seen in that bear's eyes. It faded quickly, though, and the music slowed to a stop.