Squall's Toilet Seat Dilemma

Disclaimer oh how I loathe thee. Anyway, blady blady blah. i don't own FF8, FF7 or any of their characters. My friend and I made this up at 10:00 at night, and we thought it was funny, so I thought you all would too. Really stupid humor, but funny anyway. Flames are welcome I guess. this is only my 3rd fic however, so they aren't welcome with open arms.


Squall was sitting in front of the TV, playing Final Fantasy VII, when Rinoa came through the door. "Squall dear, would you like to go to the store with me?" She asked sweetly. "Uh huh." He answered flatly, enthralled in his video game. "Can we go now?" Rinoa said persistently. "Uh huh." He still answered. "Can I rip the PlayStation out of the wall?" She said still smoothly. "Uh huh… I mean, I mean, NO!" Squall came back to life, wanting to know what was going on. "What was it that you wanted Rinoa?" He asked pleasingly. "I WANTED to know if you were coming to the store with me?!" She almost yelled. "Oh, oh, yes, of course anything for you dear." He replied. Under his breath he muttered, "Just as long as you don't rip my precious PlayStation out of the wall." "WHAT WAS THAT!?" She screamed. Squall flinched, "nothing dear, nothing at all." "I have to go pay the water bill before we leave." Rinoa looked at him questionably. "But I just paid that yesterday! What the hell do those creeps think they're doing?" She said viciously. "No Rinoa. I meant I have to take a pee." Squall talked to her as if she were a six-year-old.

As Squall came out of the bathroom, Rinoa decided she should probably go before they left. "I'm gonna go really quick. Wait out here." She told Squall. She got into the bathroom, and just as she was sitting down, she felt a cold liquid beneath her, and her butt getting sopping wet. "Holy shit!" She whispered raggedly. She lifted herself from the freezing water, and slammed the toilet seat down. "Goddamn you Squall. Why did I marry you again?" She got finished, and yelled at the top of her lungs, "SQUALL REESE LEONHART! GET YOUR LILLY ASS IN HERE RIGHT NOW!!!!!"" Squall heard this, jumped and yelped, and ran for the bathroom.

"Yes Rinoa my sweet? My darling? My… my love?" Squall asked quickly. Rinoa pointed an angry finger at the toilet seat, she had put it up before he got in there to see his mistake. "Oh shit…" Squall started, but Rinoa finished for him. "Yeah oh shit is right! I just sat my butt in freezing disgusting toilet water!" "Uh, uh, I… I… I was thinking about, Cloud, and… and Tifa, and… and," Squall pauses, thinking about how much trouble he is going to be in. "Please, please forgive me? Pleeeeaasee?" He asked like a Kindergartner. "Squall, I hate to do this, but I'm going to have to ground you from your PlayStation for… 1… no, make that 2 months!" Rinoa informed him. "NOOOOOOO! PLEASE!! ANYTHING BUT THAT!!! I'LL PAINT YOUR TOENAILS AND MASSAGE YOUR FEET FOR A MONTH!" He offered, screaming like a banshee. "No Squall. I just sat my cute little ass in freezing cold water! Now, you go and wait in the car right now young man. Or we can make it 3 months." Rinoa said threateningly. Squall dashed out of the bathroom, and jumped in the car. As Rinoa came out, she saw him in the front seat. His bottom lip stuck out, and he was grumbling cuss words under his breath. "Keep it up Squall. And it will be a year." Squall immediately stopped with the cuss words, but his bottom lip still stuck out. And with that, they drove off towards Balamb.

The End

By WishMonkey-128 and SquallsAngel