DISCAIMER: Don't own Resident Evil or Charlie Daniel's "Devil Went Down to Georgia"

A/N: It seems I'm having a run of song parody ideas today. So here, have another one just for fun… Oh! For those of you who have heard this song you know that most of the lines are actually spoken. So anything in italics is sung.

"Wesker Went Up to Umbrella" as sung by Leon S. Kennedy, Albert Wesker, and Hunk.

[Leon stands before a microphone, behind him are Claire on drums, Jill on guitar, Chris on fiddle, and Carlos on bass guitar. They all appear to be standing in front of an Umbrella Installation, with looks a great deal like a cross between the Spencer Mansion and the Training Facility.]


Wesker went up to Umbrella

He was looking for a virus to steal

He was in a bind

Cause his quota was behind

And he figured maybe he could make a deal

When he came across this young guy shooting at zombies

And killing a lot

Wesker jumped into the fray and said


U.B.C.S. Boy let me tell you something

I'm an evil killer too

And if you'd care to take a chance

I'll make a deal with you

Now you shoot zombies pretty good boy

But give a virus enhanced bastard his due

I bet a paycheck from HCF against one from Umbrella

That says I can steal a virus before you


And the guy said…


My name's Hunk and it might be against the rules

But I'll take your deal and you're in trouble now

Cause they call me death and I'm the best Umbrella has


Hunk clean up your berretta

And keep your ammo pouch full

Cause hell's broke loose at Umbrella

And Wesker's a treacherous bastard

And if you beat him

You'll get an HCF paycheck

But if you lose you'll lose your weekly wage

Wesker jumped through a nearby window yelling..


I'll go first


Wesker sped down hall through hall

Killing guards as he went

It looked a lot like a blood bath

A band of guards started shooting

It sounded a lot like WW III

(Chris has a fiddle solo)

And when he had returned

He had a G-Virus sample

Gained in ten minutes flat

And when Wesker sent him a cocky smile

Hunk said


Well you're not too bad son

But sit down on the dead zombie there

And let a professional show you how it's done


Wesker's outside boy

Run Hunk run

An HCF paycheck is waiting

All you need is a virus sample

And you could be that much richer

(Chris has another solo)

Wesker bowed his head as Hunk returned

Carrying a GT-Virus sample

Gotten in 3 minutes flat

Wesker pulled out his wallet handing over several hundred dollar bills

And Hunk said…


Wesker you come on back

Should you ever wanna deal again

Cause I've said it once you son of a bitch

I'm the best Umbrella has


Wesker smiled evilly

Slamming a fist into Hunk's face

Now he had two viruses and his money back

True that's not how the song's supposed to end

But Wesker is a bastard

And the writer is a Fan Girl

I mean what did you expect?

[Leon stares at the lyric sheets for a few seconds, then looks back at Chris. Chris shrugs then, his mouth drops open as Wesker walks by with a pretty short haired girl who was giggling and hanging off his arm.]

Leon: Is that the author?

Chris: I think so.

Claire: Is it just me, or does Wesker look a bit uncomfortable?

Jill: Oh yea, he's suffering.

[Wesker glances behind him, mouthing the words HELP ME. Our good guys first start giggling and then break down laughing. Wesker is quickly pulled away by our rabid authoress, who appears to be carrying some butterscotch syrup.]

A/N: I hope you enjoyed!! Reviews would be greatly appreciated.