And now, Ladies and Gentlemen, I am proud to present  The-Songfic-That-Must-Not-Be-Named! applause sign flashes and curtains pull back

Voldemort stands in the middle of a circle of Death Eaters (heretofore reffered to as DE's) in a room that consists of four walls and a 'throne' (heretofore reffered to as 'throne'). Voldemort steps forward, "Today is the day I will have my revenge!" From somewhere in the circle comes a light 'on who?' Voldemort shakes his head and walks around the circle while singing:

V: I know that your powers of retention
Are as wet as a kappa's backside
But thick as you are, pay attention
My words are a matter of pride


Now walks to his 'throne' on the other side of the room while DE's look at him dumbfounded

V: It's clear from your vacant expressions
The lights are not all on upstairs
But we're talking Masters and successions


Jumps up and points into group of DE's

V: Even you can't be caught unawares
So prepare for a chance of a lifetime

dancing around room

Be prepared for sensational news
A shining new era
Is tiptoeing nearer

Lucius steps forward

L: And where do we feature?

V: Just listen to teacher

adressing all DE's

I know it sounds sordid
But you'll be rewarded
When at last I am given my dues
And injustice deliciously squared


stands and raises arms as he sings:

V: Be prepared!

Crabbe and Goyle step forward

C: Yeah, Be prepared.
G:Yeah-heh... we'll be prepared, heh.
...For what?

V: For the death of the boy

C: Why? Is he sick?

V:
throws curse at him No, fool-- we're going to kill him. And Severus

G: Great idea! Who needs a Potions Master?

C&G: No more Potions Master la--la-la--la-laa-laa!

Voldemort throws another curse

V: Idiots! There will be Potions Master!

G: Hey, but you said, uh...

V: I will be Potions Master! ...Stick with me, and you'll never be bored again!

C&G&L: Yaay! All right! Long live the Potions Master!

All DE's: Long live the Potions Master! Long live the Potions Master!

All DE's in Chorus: It's great that we'll soon be connected.
With a Master who'll be all-time adored.

turning in small circles, they go slowly out from the original circle

V: Of course, quid pro quo, you're expected
To take certain duties on board


all stop and look at him

The future is littered with prizes
And though I'm the main addressee
The point that I must emphasize is
You won't get a thing without me!


Now DE's are dancing around Voldemort

V: So prepare for the coup of the century
Be prepared for the murkiest scam
Meticulous planning

half DE's run towards Voldemort and kneel

Tenacity spanning

others do the same

Decades of denial
Is simply why I'll
Remain undisputed,


walking around group of DE's

Respected, saluted
And seen for the wonder I am
Yes, my wand and ambitions are bared


runs to stand atop 'throne' pointing wand like a sword in front of him

Be prepared!

All DE's: Yes, our wands and ambitions are bared

DE's pull out wands

Be prepared!

ends with everyone kneeling with wands pointed toward Voldemort, who is standing atop his 'throne' in a dramatic pose, wand pointed toward ceiling


Disclaimer: I own neither Harry Potter or The Lion King, so stop asking already!