Lord Cynic: (fuming) "I'm back... and waiting to hurt someone."
Mini's: OO;
Cynic: "Yeah... I'm tired, I'm hungry, don't mess with me."
Mini Jenna: "You sound like Miss Congeniality."
Cynic: "Uhhhhhhhhhhh..."
Mini Garet: "Huuuuh?"
Mini Jenna: (pink) "Nothing."
Cynic: "That's new. I'll just... go now..."
Mini Sheba: "Five bucks he falls into the dishwasher."
Mini Ivan: "You're on."
Cynic: "WHOA!" Dishwasher is set to rapid spin.
Mini Sheba: "Fork over."
Mini Ivan: "Darn."


Mini Jenna: "Cynic doesn't own Golden Sun. He owns his little Wartortle plushie though."
Cynic: OO;


Lord Cynic Productions and L.O.S.E.R.S. presents...

"The Secret Life of Adepts: Just A Game?"

Does she really love me, or is it just a game?
This question haunts my dreams ever since 'she' and I became a couple. Every night I wake up sweating, the same terrifying dream in my mind. The dream that might become a reality...

"Please, please, give me another chance. We can make this work!"
"I'm sorry, it's over."
I stare horrified at her face, wondering what I'd done for her to break up with me. However, her face remains stern, albeit sprinkled with tears and my heart breaks like a frail twig. Desperately I plead with her.
"I don't get it, what have I done? Please, tell me."
"It's not you... I just don't think we're ready for a relationship yet."
Without another word, her eyes shining with tears, she turns and walks away. After standing rooted to the spot I start to run after her. However, no matter how fast I run, she gets further apart from me. Eventually, she disappears into the distance as I fall on my knees, panting and pleading into the empty air.
"Don't go! Don't go!"

I wipe the seemingly endless sweat from my forehead and fall back onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling. Recurring images of the dream race through my mind as my eyes grow heavy. My eyes eventually close as I enter my dreams again, one fleeting thought remaining: Am I just a fool in love in her game?

"What happened? You look like you haven't slept a wink."
As I close the door behind me, my best friend stands on the garden path wearing a look of concern. For once, I understand the irony of him saying that: His spiky, untameable blonde hair (which he refuses to cut or at least trim) makes him look like he was spooked out by a ghost. I smile wearily, but it reveals the exhausted rings around my eyes.
"Nothing's wrong," I manage to stutter after stifling many yawns. "I'm just tired, that's all."
"I can see that," my friend says, raising an eyebrow. "I don't think I've ever seen your hair so flat before."
"Huh?" Confused, I pat the top of my head. Sure enough, my hair normally tall and spiky is now flat like a layer of bricks on my head.
"Are you sure you're okay?" he asks, still wearing the same look of concern on his face.
'Just like him,' I muse to myself. 'Always looking out for his friends, taking things seriously. I would've hoped Mia might've given him a sense of humour by now.' "Yeah, I'm fine," I repeat out loud. "How about you and Mia?" I ask, trying to change the subject. "Has Dora caught you two doing anything dirty yet?"
"H-Hey!" he cries, turning a ferocious red. "We used protection, I swear!"
It takes a while to register, but when it does I roar with laughter.
"It's not funny!" my friend whines, but I continue to laugh. It's a massive relief to laugh freely for a change... I'll have to thank him for this later.

As we reach the rendezvous to meet the rest of the gang, not much as changed since we left my house. I'm still chuckling to myself, and my friend is stomping alongside me, face red with a mixture of anger and embarrassment.
"Took you long enough," a sharp voice says and I cease my chuckling immediately. Realising that we've arrived, everyone starts coming over, 'her' leading the way.
Behind 'her' is her brother, looking every bit as irritable as his sister. Behind him are our younger friends, who resemble blonde mice with mop tops. Behind these two is the blue-haired optimistic girl of our group. Upon seeing him, she walks over to my best friend, who is turning red with embarrassment again, wearing a bright smile. I watch them in amusement before 'she' wraps her arms around my neck and tries to choke me playfully.
"We thought you'd gotten lost," she says before planting a kiss on my cheek. Through my half dazed eyes I see her brother glaring at me in utter fury. Although I'm half suffocating I manage a weak grin at him.
Finally, as my face turns blue and distinguishable speech becomes impossible, 'she' lets go I can breath. As soon as my vision returns to normal, I smile at her and kiss her on the forehead. Out of the corner of my eye, I see the brother silently issuing me a death sentence, the short blondies scheming Sol knows what, and my best friend being repeatedly glomped by his girlfriend. The most I can see of him is his beet red face before she smothers him with kisses again.
Before I can chuckle again, 'she' places a hand on my shoulder. I turn to find that her face has a dead serious expression. 'Oh no,' I dread immediately, 'the dream's becoming a reality.'
"Can I talk to you in private please?" she asks. I gulp and nod, and after excusing ourselves (the brother made the 'slit throat' threat, and the lovebirds were too busy to reply) we head off to a hill with a solitary tree.

"Um... what did you want to talk about?" I ask nervously while 'she' makes herself comfortable against the tree.
"You know we've been going out for a little while," she starts, leaning against the tree. "Let me ask you something... what do you truly think of me?"
I'm dumbfounded; startled at the very least that she'd ask something like this. However, it doesn't take me long to answer.
"You're the most perfect girl I've ever met," I say. "You're smart, you're beautiful, you don't let anyone push you around... why do you ask?"
I thought this would persuade Jenna to break into a smile. On the contrary she breaks into tears, and in a panic I run over and hug her.
"I'm - I'm sorry," she sobs, trying to hold back her tears. "I can't... do this anymore."
"What... what do you mean?" I ask, my heart cracking up. "What are you saying?"
She continues to sob for a few seconds, and then lifts her head. My heart shatters to see her beautiful green eyes shining with tears.
"It's... it's over."
My stomach plummets.
"Over? Are... you telling me that... this has been just a game?"
She doesn't answer me, but she turns her head to look away. Finally, to my horror, she nods.
"Please," I plead. "Give me another chance. We can make this work!"
"I'm sorry... I can't keep pulling you along this charade."
Still avoiding eye contact, she stands up and looks at the sky.
"Sheba bet me that we couldn't stay together for a week... I took that bet because I wanted to show her I could love you. That was six days ago..."
"One day left..." I said quietly, mostly to myself. "I guess you couldn't continue the bet... so, that's it then, isn't it?"
As I turn to walk away, she suddenly cries my name. However, I don't turn back around. I walk down the hill to the river, oblivious that she's running after me. As I reach the riverbank, she comes up behind me, eyes shining with tears again.
"Please," she pleads, "I want to love you with my heart this time. Won't you let me?"
This time I don't answer. I gaze at the tranquil waters of the river, anger surging inside me.
"This past week, you claimed to love me for who I was. Now I know... you never loved me."
"I-I did!" she cries. "I loved you, I love you even now!"
"No you didn't!" I snarl and she backs away. "If you did you wouldn't have taken up Sheba's bet just to prove a point! You couldn't even have the decency to try and complete it..."
"But-But," she splutters, "I love you!"
"I love you too," I say quietly, "but from now on I can never be 'in love with you'. You're right... it's over."
Without another word, I break from her grasp and walk away again. She stands on the riverbank, tears flowing endlessly down her cheeks, but I don't care.
I flinch slightly but continue walking away. My friends ask me what's wrong, but I don't answer them. Only one thing occupies my mind: "Game over."


Cynic climbs out of the diswasher. Squeaks as he walks.
Mini Jenna: "Ahahahahaha... that's funny."
Cynic: (frowning) "Considering what the story turned out to be?"
Mini Jenna: Shrugs. "Eh."
Cynic: ¬¬


Cynic: "Hum... no, this was not my original version of the story. There's actually a happy ending to it... but right now I'm too annoyed to post it as yet. If you wanna ask for it, be my guest. I MAY post it as another chapter. This is a one-shot, so no more story chapters. Will be updated for reviews. There. Oh, and no Flame/Jenna/Garet extreme bashing. Some light messing about's fine, don't trash on 'em."