Disclaimer: I own. . . um. . . er. . . my laptop?
Author's Note: Yes, I realize I should be updating. Yes, I know I'm a procrastinator. Yes, I know I deserve the irritated glare you're now shooting at this story.
But seeing as how I'm leaving on a family trip in a few days and don't want you guys to have to suffer with cliff hangers (because any update I provided now would give you that), I've decided just to write a one shot. Maybe two. I hope you understand and enjoy.
Things never stay the same for long. Change is inevitable- even in dreams. No matter how hard your subconscious tries to hold on to one image, one picture, it never can. Faces and places will fall back into the shadowed depths of your mind, then rise again as something new, over and over and over.
But once in a while one will find themselves locked in a reoccurring dream- one that presents itself so often that the story is second nature; the characters your friends, enemies, lovers. Your world becomes one of illusions.
I have no reoccurring dreams.
. . . Only a reoccurring maiden.
I first meet my dream woman in a magical field of blood stained flowers. Even in my subconscious I recognize her- Kikyo. Kikyo the damned miko from hell. I feel hatred well up inside my hurt heart as I begin to leap over the maroon daisies and the wilting spring beauties- towards her cursed form. However, I am no where near quiet enough and she easily hears. She begins to turn, her long hair rustling in the breeze- - -
As she smiles at me.
I come to a sudden stop.
Kikyo. . . ?
Since when have your eyes been so blue?
The image begins to trickle slowly into space, rippling and fading before my eyes. I try to fight the feeling; but it is like holding water in cupped hands.
The next time I see her I am near a crystal stream, taking in the violet sunlight as leaves of silver float past on the breeze. One or two land gracefully in the water, making the jeweled lily pads sparkle like stars. I smile slightly at the beautiful scene and, on impulse, look up to find someone to share it with.
That's when I spot her.
She's happily stranded on the opposite bank, kneeling comfortably on the gold-dust sand and beaming at me, her ebony hair dancing around her pretty form. She winks, her ocean-deep eyes singing silent songs to me.
I feel my cheeks redden as I open my mouth, preparing to call out to her.
But once again, the picture fades.
All I am left with is the knowledge that the girl- whoever she is- is not Kikyo. At first glance she may appear to be, she may even smell a bit like her-
But she is not.
Kikyo is an illusion. She is a reality.
Twisted shadows blind me as I search fruitlessly through streams of miasma and gas, through purple and black flares. I can hear screaming all around me, souls crying my name.
But over all of them, I can hear one the clearest.
"Inu-Yasha! Inu-Yasha! Help me!"
I spin on my heel, twisting left and right, and suddenly notice that I am surrounded on all sides by white baboons. They sneer at me; and- despite their almost comical appearance- I give a small shudder of fear. But the fear doesn't hold long- it's annihilated by an odd tugging in my heart and soul- a yearning, subduing, all out heart-wrenching need to rescue the sobbing voice. Teardrops begin showering down around me, each smelling sweetly of the girl at the stream.
"Inu-Yasha. . . Please. . ."
I call out a name- a name that even I do not know- but a name that feels right. It rolls off my tongue like a pearl, leaving a delicious after taste in my mouth. It is her name-
But as soon as I say it I forget it.
I try to run and find her, but my legs are stuck; frozen.
And as horror takes over me- as a feeling of absolute powerlessness swallows my rationality- I feel my blood begin to churn, burn, and scald my veins.
I see the world through a sheet of red glass.
Then I pass out.
They're everywhere- hanging from the ceiling, decorating the walls, adorned on the ground. The candlelight even casts triangle-shaped shadows. From somewhere far away, a clock's incessant ticking echoes.
"Who is it going to be, Inu-Yasha?"
I instantly turn around, finding myself face to face with the girl. Well, not face to face- more like chest to face. She needs to grow a bit more. I glance down at her in confusion, barely noticing a rosary around my neck- one that was never there before. "What?"
"Who is it going to be?" she repeats, staring up at me with those deep, deep blue eyes. The eyes that had been haunting me since her first appearance. I realized then that I craved those eyes- that I was and am addicted to them. But I hate the glittering tears that she has chosen to decorate her gorgeous azure orbs with. On instinct I reach out to brush them away, and she seems to soften as I do.
"I don't understand," I murmur, still bewildered as I grew drunk on the feel of her moonlight colored flesh. So soft, so warm. . . I haven't felt warmth in so long. "Who are you talking about?"
"Kikyo. You. Me," she clarifies shortly, her brow scrunching as another wave of sadness shakes her form. "Which of us do you want to be with?"
I almost do a double take. Why would I even consider staying with a betraying bitch? "Y- - -"
She shakes her head as soon as I start to speak, gently pressing her long, slender fingers to my lips. I silence myself. "No, don't answer," she chokes, a soft, joyless laugh escaping her. "I don't want to know. . . But always remember, no matter what, Inu-Yasha," she continues in a whisper, locking our gazes as she presses her palm over my heart. I cover her trembling hand with my own. "I'll never leave you. As long as you want me to, I'll stay. You are my home, Inu-Yasha. My belonging place."
Her words shook my mind, contradicting all I'd ever known to be true.
She. . . She wants to be by me? Someone wants to stay with me. . . ? I bite my lip, feeling my heartbeat quicken. She can feel it too, I know she can.
". . . No," I finally shake my head, a small smile tugging on my lips. "No. You are my belonging place." Reaching out, I pull her close to me, burying my nose in her silky midnight hair. "Stay with me forever. . ."
"I'll try. . ." she promises softly. "I'll try."
But as soon she speaks I feel her body disintegrate like dust, along with the room around me. And suddenly I am holding onto nothing but an arrow that has- for the millionth time- pierced through my wounded heart, dragging me down to hell.
I see Kikyo's gentle smile when I close my eyes in pain; the smile that I had worked so hard to extract- the smile that she had shared with me and me alone. But, for some reason, the shimmer of deep blue eyes- a shade of azure hope that I had never and will never see in anyone else- seems more special, more binding, than any grin that miko could share with me.
All the same. . .
I feel myself fall in love again.
I am a two-timing fool.
I'm alone. . .
For the first time in what seems years, I'm alone again. Darkness and shadows surround me completely, and I am only able to see my own body through the dimness. There is no village, no youkai, no dream girl. . .
Not even a rabbit to chase and kill for food.
Loneliness sets in like a fatal disease, attacking my heart with knives of pain. Where is she. . . ? Where is Kikyo? I don't understand what's wrong- what's going on?
Then, through the inky blackness, two beams of light shine. And both illuminate the oddest of things. . .
One brings into focus an oven. An oven full of the strangest of ingredients- mud, dust, charred bones. It seems like a vision from the underworld. I turn quickly away from the sight.
The other is a well. An old, broken well that I recognize- near the village. Wasn't that where the men dumped the bones of defeated oni? I frown slightly, crinkling my nose as I take a step closer to it; listening to the birds sing. And then, when nothing bad happens, I take another step. And then another. Until all of the sudden I'm surrounded by light and I'm no longer watching the well- I'm inside it. Floating on air. . .
After a few moments of flying I land with a dusty thud on the ground and peer above me. I'm at the bottom of the hole. . . Looking up at a wooden ceiling?
There are no ceilings in the woods. . .
I leap out of the well- - -
And land with another soft 'THUD on a plushy floor.
. . . Plushy floor? I blink in surprise, staring all around me. What is this place? Why does it smell like the stream-girl? What are these strange devices? Why- - -
I pause when I see her- asleep on her weird futon. My blue-eyed maiden. . .
Crouching down beside her, I stare into her slumbering face. She looks the part of an angel, curled on her side like a kitten. She's very beautiful, now, like always. . . But I wish I could stare into her eyes.
"Inu-Yasha. . ." she whispers in her sleep, shocking me. She's. . . dreaming of me? Like I dream of her?
I can't help but lean forward, hanging onto her every breath.
". . . Inu-Yasha. . .
And, for the third time, I feel my body come in contact with the ground with a 'THUD'. But this time, I don't get up.
"Inu-Yasha? Inu-Yasha, are you okay?"
"Shit! He just fainted!"
"Ha, I'm not surprised. He's a father now, after all!"
Wha. . . ?
I slowly peal my eyelids apart, wincing as bright sunlight blinds me. Holding up a lead-heavy hand to shade my eyes, I slowly sit up and look around me. Wha. . . I'm at Kikyo's. . . ? In the middle of the road? I get to my feet, hearing but not processing the three hurried, happy voices that are echoing all around me- the three sets of gentle hands that are trying to help me up. My mind reels with questions: What's going on? Where is my dream girl? And who are these people? These laughing, carefree people who are calling me by name without fear? Without scorn? Without grimaces on their faces?
"Come on, Inu-Yasha!" one giggles, his short, red-haired head bouncing up and down excitedly as I stare into his sparkling emerald eyes. He's a demon. . . But a harmless one. "Mama's had the baby! Mama's had the baby! Can you hear it crying?"
". . . What?" I stare blankly down at the child, totally clueless despite the fact that he is correct: I can hear the scream of a newborn. 'What baby? Mama?'
"Don't be stupid!" another voice laughs, this one quite female. I feel a large weapon crack over my noggin- but in a teasing way. (Not to say it doesn't hurt, though.) A woman with long, chestnut hair and cheerful magenta orbs steps into my line of vision, putting away a large boomerang. (Yeah, that would hurt.) "You know what we're talking about! That fall couldn't have made you loose everything in your thick skull!"
"No, I- - -!"
"It's just his nerves," the final person grins, his twilight colored eyes kind as he throws his arm around me, twirling a useless string of prayer beads around one finger as a staff jingles in his other hand. "I was the same way after our son was born, remember?"
"Oh, yeah," the woman nods, looking a bit nostalgic as she stares off into space. "Speaking of which, I do hope he's behaving for Kohaku. . ."
"Er- what are you talking abo- - -?" I begin, but am cut off when the old rush-reed flap covering Kikyo's hut moves aside, and an old woman steps out onto the porch. I frown, knowing her aura but not recognizing it off the top of my head. However, all thoughts of who this aged miko could be are wiped from my mind as she smiles and ushers us inside the cool, shadowed hut.
And, though I know it was at a time Kikyo's home- I cannot find a hint of her scent. Only the perfect pureness of my dream girl's fragrance.
The three around me suddenly whisper a name- the name of the girl; and god damn I wish I could remember it!- before rushing past me towards the pale form lying on the ground, smiling tiredly and holding a small bundle in her arms. They all began chattering at once, mostly about my fainting dead away, until she holds up a hand, signaling for them to silence themselves. They obey and mimic her as she lifts her face and beams at me, her mythical blue eyes shinning with happiness.
Then she murmurs one word:
And I am ripped from the vision so quickly that I never realize what happened.
Where. . . am I?
The familiar question makes my sore mind reel as I stare inquisitively around me. The God Tree. . . ? Why can't I move? What am I- - - ?
It all comes rushing back:
Kikyo. Betrayal. Jewel. Arrow. Sealed.
I feel my upper lip quiver with rage as a pungent odor hits my nose, making me forget all of my dreams, all that I'd learned inside them. "The smell. . ." I hiss, eyes narrowing. "The smell of her who killed me. . . Is coming closer!"
'But is it really her scent?' I can't help but wonder behind my mask of fury, staring coldly into the thrashing brush around me. 'If it is- than why is it so sweet. . . ?'
And it is not until later- when I find myself staring into the deep azure eyes of the unfamiliar woman who called herself 'Kagome'- that one, small memory from my dreams seeps back into my conciseness.
This woman is not Kikyo.
Her eyes are too blue.
- - -
One note: I read the manga. In said manga, Kagome's eyes are BLUE. Please do not fight me on this. (-: Thankies!
Please R&R! (-;