It's sick. The whole damn situation. The fact that he uses me as a substitute and the fact that I keep going back although I know it. Because even though I'm not the one he loves, I love him. I allowed myself to believe that he'd be different because he's a mutant, too. I deluded myself into believing that I could be SOMEONE to somebody. I wanted to matter. I wanted someone to miss me if I were to die, and not just the late night fuck-sessions with 'Charles'
I wanted so much more then I'll ever get, and I'll just have to live with that.