Right Kind of Wrong
Author's Comments: Well it certainly has been a long time since I've touched this story. The muses were just sleeping all this time and I had actually thought them to be dead. Good thing I was wrong. The other day they came back to me, so now, I can continue this fic, one of the first serious fics I've had for Naruto way before I really knew about the series.
This chapter, being very very late (gomen gomen), if anyone remembers the story at all, will finally explain why Sasuke hates Itachi so much. I know the last one touched on it, but this one will actually explain it fully. It's also the chapter where Naruto wakes up after that party he went to with Itachi, oi, angst away!
I hope you all enjoy it. Here we go, back to our lovely, lovely song.
Warning! There is some het in this chapter, but nothing to really worry over.
The sound of a phone ringing echoed through his ears. That annoying ring college phones seemed to do because for some reason they seemed to ring the loudest, as if trying to wake the dead from either drinking too much or studying too hard. He knew that when a phone rang you were supposed to pick it up. He knew that he was supposed to open his eyes, sit up, reach forward, and grab the phone.
But he just couldn't get himself to open his eyes.
Part of Naruto wanted to stay tucked under the covers and sleep for longer than forever. He really didn't feel like dealing with all that life crap anymore. Life was overrated, really. Who needed it? Life was where men could lure you into drunken hazes that led to you being laid down with false gentleness in a bed you didn't want to be in. Life was where men could, and did, make you feel things you didn't want to, make you allow things you didn't want to, take fear and excitement and blend the two together in an orgasm you didn't want to happen.
At the same time, dream was where that event played over and over again in a frightening song. With lyrics he didn't want to hear and instruments that unwillingly caressed him and left him naked, shivering, and with an intense feeling of shame that made him want to throw up.
The phone stopped ringing. Finally. "Hello?" It took Naruto a while to register the voice that had answered the phone.
Sasuke who had held him last night. That was the last thing Naruto had a clear grip on. Sasuke's arms around him, after that things began to explode in spiked punch colors dotted in that loud techno music that had been playing. He was vaguely aware of being taken to a car. The taste in his mouth let him know that he had thrown up quite a few times, though he couldn't remember where. On the way out maybe? In the back seat? In a toilet, on the bed? Maybe even on Sasuke, the thought of that made Naruto's stomach gurgle at the image. What an impression to make, throwing up on the guy you still liked.
"No... he left already." Sasuke muttered, trying hard to remember not to sound pissed off when talking to his parents. But oh, he wanted to tell them so badly about their perfect son, their perfect fucking son who had tried to force his roommate into having sex with him. Sasuke desperately tried not to use rape, if he did he'd get even more pissed off and end up snapping at his mother who was currently going on and on about how nice it was for Itachi to visit his younger brother. "Yes mom... it was nice of him to visit..." Naruto could feel Sasuke biting his tongue to keep down any comments he really wanted to say. Nice of him to visit and take my roommate to that damn shark faced asshole's party. Nice of him to visit and give my roommate that drink. Nice of him to visit and ruin something I wanted to hold onto, as if Gaara wasn't enough, as if anyone else I might've had in my life wasn't enough.
Naruto suddenly had the urge to wake up no matter how hard it was. No matter how much he really didn't feel like dealing with all of this. The last thing he probably needed to see was Sasuke's face right now, Sasuke who looked too much like Itachi. The thought of that alone made Naruto queasy, but at the same time hearing him deal with his parents who actually thought this man was... was perfect!
"Sasuke..." Naruto's voice was soft and in desperate need of water. It almost hurt to talk, as if he hadn't done it in years. It took all the power he had in his body to look over at Sasuke and not try to scamper away like a frightened rabbit. Gods, he looked like that man so much. Looking at him brought back headache inducing images of the previous night. But looking into Sasuke's eyes at that moment Naruto knew that he was not supposed to turn away, not now. "Can... I have some water, please?"
Sasuke looked so relieved that all he could do was nod his head, say a soft, "I'll call you back later mom," before the woman could even get another word in, hang up the phone, and go and get Naruto his water.
It was like walking through a photo album of memories that could never be covered up in dust. He still remembered being a student, wandering through the halls of the dorms, trying to beat the guy down the hall to the bathroom so he could use the shower, trying to get to the lunchroom before they stopped serving food. No matter how long ago that was those pictures were still fresh in his head.
As Haku walked down the hall of the dormitory Sasuke and Naruto lived in he realized that he was about to add another picture into the album. Being a former college student he had, of course, heard the stories about weekend parties. Fraternity houses, apartments, dorms, the weekend was a secret code for no name beer being consumed like water. Of course there were the other stories, the dangerous ones, the ones that you believed to be used as a scare tactic. It was college, the college student was invincible, able to go to twelve parties in a single night. Those stories about spiked drinks, date rape, unwanted sex, painful tears, all of that was nothing but a myth.
A very true myth.
Maybe Haku hadn't seen it before as a student, but he wasn't a student anymore and he wasn't looking through their glasses. Maybe it was because as a student Haku didn't do parties, only drank once when he hit twenty-one and was able to, spent those party nights reading for his favorite class, the class taught by Professor Zabuza. Whatever it was Haku wanted to believe in that myth, especially now, wanted to wake up the next day in Zabuza's arms and be told that what happened to Naruto was all in his head.
Why couldn't life be unreal this one time? Why couldn't it had all been in his head?
Haku sighed and turned a corner, moving out the way of a random boy who was running down the hallway, shouting something about a football game that was going on in a few hours. More boys followed him, each of them cheering on the team. Haku just shook his head and wondered what the hell was with the rest of the world? Didn't the world know what happened to Naruto last night? Why was everyone else so damn happy?
Not everyone was happy. When Haku got close to the room he stopped and just stared at the door. Leaning against the wall near the door was that boy from yesterday, Gaara? Yes, that was his name. The boy from yesterday who rode with them to Kisame's apartment. Haku wondered why Gaara was just leaning against the wall with his arms crossed at his chest, showing no signs of knocking to try and get in. He just stood there, a cigarette hanging from his mouth despite the fact that smoking was not supposed to be done in the hallways.
Haku had a feeling that no one dared to try and tell this boy that.
"Gaara?" Gaara turned to look at Haku. Gaara, so this was Gaara. Haku remembered Naruto talking about him at the ice cream shop when they went together. This was the other person in Naruto's story. Haku took a moment to look over him, really look over him, since he didn't get a chance to do so in the mess that was yesterday. Damn, Haku thought to himself, where were the guys who looked like this when he was in school? "How... is he doing?"
"He's awake. I can hear him in there." Gaara blew a puff of smoke into the air. Haku remembered being a kid and seeing ads for cigarettes and how his parents told him that they did not make you look cool and that the commercials were lying to try and get him to start smoking too. Hn. Had the ads had Gaara as their spokesperson every kid would ignore their parents and use their allowance on the tobacco sticks.
"Oh. Why don't you go in?"
"No." Gaara let some ash fall to the ground as if it was his own personal ashtray. "He's talking to Sasuke right now." The cigarette was almost crushed in between Gaara's fingers at the mention of that taboo word: Sasuke.
/they say you're something i should do without/
"And I take it you don't like Sasuke?" Of course, Haku knew the whole story. Along with the story Haku knew all about the characters. One key thing he remembered Naruto telling him was that Gaara was confusing. Confusing as all kinds of hell. Haku was starting to see what Naruto meant by that.
The obvious answer to the question was no, I don't like Sasuke. This was obvious with Gaara now liking Naruto. But Gaara was the type of character to completely flip the word "obvious" over, scramble it, then reuse the pieces to make a completely different word. If he didn't like Sasuke why did he help him yesterday? Gaara could've easily went to the party himself and got Naruto, but instead he got Sasuke. Why?
When Gaara didn't answer the question Haku tried another. "Are you worried about Naruto?"
"Of course I am."
"Do you want to talk to him?"
"I'd like to. But he's in there right now." All right. So whether Gaara liked Sasuke or not was questionable, but he was definitely bitter about the boy. "I'll let Sasuke talk to him."
"They're not on the best of terms right now." Gaara just looked down at the cigarette in between his fingers. "Sasuke ended things with Naruto."
"And rushed after him when he found out he was in trouble."
"So?" Gaara looked over at Haku. "That could mean anything."
"Guilt. It was his brother who did it. Anger. It was his brother who did it. With Sasuke, Itachi comes first, always. No exceptions. I don't have to tell Naruto that... Sasuke will hang himself."
"And you'll be there to pick up the pieces?"
"Pretty much." Gaara went back to smoking his cigarette. "Someone like Naruto would never work with someone like Sasuke. I'm sure of it." Haku just watched Gaara for a moment before he looked at the door to Sasuke and Naruto's room. After a moment he leaned back against the wall too. He wasn't really the type to listen in on a conversation, but the two boys needed a chance to talk before anyone went in to check up on anyone.
Besides... he wanted to know how the story would play out. The two main characters were about to have that much needed talk, after all.
/they don't know what goes on
when the lights go out/
It took about three glasses of water for Naruto to finally stop gulping down each cup he was handed. As much as he loved the wonders of caffeine and wondered why Sasuke just had to keep water in the fridge, for the first time Naruto thanked Sasuke for all the water, and for the first time Naruto's taste buds exploded at the delicious taste of ice cold water. Murmuring a soft thank you Naruto laid back down in the bed, feeling a bit better now that the vomit taste was out of his mouth. The headache was still there, that damn techno music from the party drumming through his head but not nearly as loud as it had been while he was asleep.
As he lied there Naruto wondered what he could possibly say. The silence was bugging the hell out of him but at the same time he couldn't think of anything appropriate to say. Maybe he could thank Sasuke for coming after him last night and stopping an already bad situation from getting worse. Maybe he could thank him for holding him the way he did, and helping him the way he did. While Sasuke was getting him water Naruto had seen the damage, had seen the new sheets on his bed along with a fresh set of pajamas on his body. The laundry basket at the door also told Naruto just how out of it he must've been last night. The room was decorated in the smell of cinnamon spray to mask any odor the clothes of last night were giving off from the laundry basket.
Definitely had to thank Sasuke.
But before Naruto got a chance to Sasuke sat down on the edge of Naruto's bed and spoke. "I'm sorry."
Naruto blinked. Sasuke just... what?
"I'm sorry." Sasuke said again, this time in a much softer voice that almost sounded... broken. "I should've... I should've never..." Naruto laid there and waited. He had been dreaming of this apology, hadn't he? Ever since Sasuke had ended any chance of anything between them Naruto had been craving this apology, playing it over and over again in his head. He didn't think there would be any chance but... it seemed like... "I should've never let you get close."
... it seemed like... the apology Naruto wanted wasn't going to happen.
"If I wouldn't have..."
"Stop it." Naruto whispered as he stared up at the ceiling. The white of the wall above him looked blurry, funny, was he crying now? He brushed his fingers across his eyes and frowned when he felt a slow growing wetness tickle his skin. Damnit, he wasn't crying but he was close.
"I said stop it!" Naruto's head yelled at him in protest, causing him to wince in pain and remember that he was currently suffering from a headache. Too bad he didn't care. "Don't you dare say something like that."
"It's true." Sasuke muttered. "It's my fault..."
"Itachi..." Sasuke growled out the name. "Itachi Itachi, fucking perfect Itachi." Naruto took a moment to remember that sketchpad Sasuke had. All of those sketches of Itachi, all of them reminding Sasuke just how perfect his brother was. Perfect... to think that man who did those things to him last night was considered perfect.
"So... how is it your fault if you keep saying Itachi?"
"Because... because I know what he's like, I know what he does."
"Listen to yourself." Naruto sat up, mentally giving himself a pat on the back for not showing any signs of the pain he felt in his head. "You know what he's like? He does those things, Sasuke. You have nothing to do with it."
"I have everything to do with it! If I hadn't... damnit!" Sasuke yelled. He didn't want to start yelling but he had to make Naruto see... "If I hadn't had anything to do with you he wouldn't have gone after you!"
Naruto tried to open his mouth to respond but nothing came out. Was that... really true? Did Itachi really...
... hadn't Gaara... said something about this? That night the two of them... didn't he mention... but... did that mean Sasuke said goodbye because he didn't want Itachi to... why would Itachi... jesus christ, as if Naruto needed to have anymore thoughts swimming in his head.
Naruto took a deep breath and closed his eyes. If he really concentrated he could get the drumming to stop in his head long enough for the thoughts to try and become organized. Maybe he could even form a question to ask Sasuke... "You're saying that... Itachi goes after people you become interested in?" There it was, the question. Laid out on the table. He just needed Sasuke to confirm it, make it sink in. Part of Naruto selfishly prayed. Prayed that Sasuke said yes because that meant that he did care, cared to the point of pushing Naruto away to try and protect him. It meant that Sasuke truly did feel something for him.
Sasuke remained quiet.
"Please? Sasuke, tell me." Tell me that you care. Tell me that something is there between us. Naruto looked at Sasuke with hopeful eyes, please say that... we had something. We don't have to try and get it back if you don't want to, but please... just say that there was something once upon a time between us.
Sasuke remained quiet.
"Damnit, Sasuke! Just tell me, yes or no! I need to know!" The concept of having a headache melted away completely. Headaches weren't important when Naruto was finally getting a chance to find out the truth. Did he mean anything, anything at all?
"It doesn't matter. Whatever we might've had doesn't matter, we ended things."
"No, you ended things." Naruto frowned a bit. "That doesn't mean that I ended anything."
"You didn't? Really?" Sasuke gave a bitter laugh. "You slept with someone else, did you not?"
"Why does it matter?" Naruto gave a sad little smirk. "You just said you ended things, right? So why do you care?"
"You're right. Why do I care?" Sasuke stood up and walked away from the bed. Naruto watched him quietly then lowered his head, biting his lower lip to force himself not to cry. He was not going to cry, what the hell would that do anyway?
"I know... you care..." Naruto whispered softly. "You don't want to admit it, but I know you do." Sasuke simply sat at his computer, not responding. "I know that you care about me, you bastard! I know you care!" Sasuke still didn't say anything. "How much do I have to go through to get you to say it? What do I have to do, Sasuke?" Naruto allowed a tear to fall, just one, but no more. "Maybe... if your brother would've gone all the way with me... you'd admit it."
That did it.
"What did you just say?" Sasuke turned to look at Naruto, frowning. "Tell me you did not just say that."
"I don't know which one is worse. The fact that I said it and actually believe it... or the fact that you just proved it since you finally started talking to me when I mentioned him."
"Take it back."
Naruto looked up at Sasuke and winced from the angry look in the boy's eyes. That look... that kind of heart stopping look had to be an Uchiha trait. Part of him said to just drop the subject, because making Sasuke madder would only make things worse. The other part... didn't give a damn how pissed off Sasuke got. Did Sasuke have any idea what he just went through last night at that party? And even after all of that... Sasuke still couldn't say three little words.
Yes, I care.
So Naruto shook his head, not taking back his words. Sasuke glared at him. "Take it back, Naruto."
"Why should I? It's true, isn't it?" Sasuke began to walk over towards Naruto but that still didn't make the other boy back down. "I bet... I-I bet..." Naruto's heart was pounding madly, spinning out of control. Sasuke was getting close, too close, and those eyes were looking more and more like Itachi's from how angry they looked. Naruto was definitely crossing lines that Sasuke didn't want him to. "I bet if..." Naruto took a deep breath, no stuttering, not over this. "I bet if that bastard would've fucked me you'd tell me you cared!"
Before Sasuke knew it his hand was slapping Naruto across the face so hard that Sasuke himself felt a stinging pain across his cheek. He didn't really just do that, did he? But there Naruto was, holding his cheek with a wide eyed look of surprise and pain. Sasuke stared down at his hand, his own eyes widening as the sound of his hand crashing against Naruto's face decided to play over and over again inside of his head, echoing around his heart.
He just... slapped... he just... oh gods... Naruto...
Part of Naruto wanted to leave even if moving all the way to the door was probably the worse idea to have in the world. Part of him wanted to punch Sasuke in the face but something inside of him just shattered into pieces of defeat. What would hitting Sasuke back do? What would yelling at him do, pleading with him, crying... nothing worked. The only thing that did seem to work was mentioning Itachi, that was the only thing that seemed to cause any kind of reaction.
It wasn't always like this, was it? Naruto remembered that day in the rain, those days when they spent time together as roommates, no, as... friends... maybe something more than that. Those days before... Itachi came into the picture.
But... perhaps maybe it was his own fault. He had been warned, been shown several signs. He still remembered what happened with Sakura. The poor lovesick girl. And how could he forget how Sasuke first treated him? Sex. Then there was Gaara. The ex. And then... Itachi. All the warning signs had been put up for him... and it took a slap to the face for him to finally pay attention to them.
Naruto was certainly a brave one. Gaara had to give him credit. Actually going head to head with Sasuke in an argument about his brother, that was truly impressive. Still, that gave Sasuke no right to hit the other boy and Gaara felt the need to step in. Sasuke had said enough, or rather, had not said enough. But the fact that he couldn't even say that he cared... it was over.
Haku simply watched. It wasn't really his place to interfere. He knew about the situation but he wasn't really one of the main players in it. It would only make things worse if an outside source had stepped in, Itachi being the extreme example of an outside force.
Outside, no that wasn't right. Itachi was actually in the center of the stage, the part of Sasuke that needed to be revealed and explained to someone, needed to be understood. Why, why did Sasuke suffer so much because of this man? Suffer to the point of rejecting anything that involved caring, loving... rejecting Naruto. Haku didn't want to really believe it for the simple fact that it would hurt Naruto so much. He wasn't one to pick sides, but if he had to choose between Sasuke or Gaara his choice would be Naruto. His choice would be for anything that would make Naruto happy.
Perhaps... Sasuke wasn't that choice after all. He seemed to be doing more harm than good.
Gaara moved from off of the wall and turned to knock on the door... but then his hand paused when he heard... something...
No. It couldn't be.
/there's no way to explain/
"Stay away from me." Naruto whispered, still holding his cheek. He made it a point not to look at Sasuke, not after that. "I get it, o.k.? So just leave me the hell alone."
"Naruto..." But Sasuke wasn't listening, wasn't listening at all. Instead he stepped closer to Naruto, his hands shaking, actually shaking, as he reached towards him. When Naruto felt two fingers brush against the hand that was holding his cheek his eyes flew up to look at Sasuke and he was ready to yell at the boy.
But then his voice caught in his throat.
Sasuke... "Sasuke?" Sasuke was...
"I'm sorry..." Sasuke's voice was so soft and so full of tears that had been dying to be shed for so long. Years. Ages before there was a Naruto, ages before there was a Gaara. During the time when there was an Itachi near him, too near him, the dominant force of his life. "... I'm... I'm sorry..." Naruto just watched him, not really sure what to make of this. This was something completely new. Sasuke... he was... "I'm so sorry..." Sasuke moved Naruto's hand away from his cheek and let both of his own hands caress the sides of Naruto's face. They were still shaking, shaking so much.
Sasuke was... Naruto just watched him sadly, watched those eyes water... felt those hands trembling against his skin... listened to that voice... "I'm sorry I'm sorry..."
Sasuke was breaking down.
"Sasuke..." But Naruto didn't get to say anything else before Sasuke pulled him up and held him desperately close in his arms. The movement caught him by surprise and almost made him dizzy, but Naruto was much too surprised to really remember anything like the pain of his cheek, his head, the nauseating sick feeling from last night. How could he think about any of those things when Sasuke was holding him so tightly, so desperately?
"I'm sorry..." Sasuke couldn't think of anything else to say. He was sorry, really sorry. Sorry for slapping him, sorry for hurting him, sorry for just... hurting period. Sorry for Itachi, sorry... just sorry.
It was odd, Naruto thought to himself, being the one who was doing the comforting. But them standing the way they were, with Sasuke hugging Naruto, seemed to be enough. Eventually Sasuke's hold became looser, lost its desperation, and the apologies stopped.
Naruto opened his mouth to say something, to try and give a comforting word, but Sasuke began to speak. "Yes." He said softly. "My brother goes after people I become interested in." Naruto just nodded his head. His original question had been answered and now he knew the truth.
But... it didn't stop there.
"She was cute... like you."
It was probably the most inappropriate thing to say, but he said it anyway. "You were with a girl?" Sasuke just stared at Naruto for a moment then laughed. What the hell kind of thing was that to say in a situation like this? But... it was something Naruto would say, speak without thinking, ask the first thing that came to mind.
"Naruto? I did sleep with Sakura, remember?"
"Well yeah... but... that was... you had said..."
"Are you going to let me tell the story or not?"
Naruto made a face at Sasuke. "Are you going to tell the story while standing up and holding me?"
"What if I say yes?"
"Jerk." That both made them smile.
/all the pleasure is worth all the pain/
And so he listened.
Listened to the story of a boy named Sasuke who was not quite sixteen but getting pretty close. Sasuke who lived with his brother, Itachi. Sasuke who had, at one time, begged his parents to let him live with his older brother.
Gods... Sasuke had actually looked up to him.
His parents had agreed, in fact, they had packed Sasuke's bags for him. What a great plan it was to let their youngest live with his brother. Mother was surprised she hadn't thought of it herself. Itachi. One of those kids that could always make his parents proud. Almost finished with college, Itachi had received a full scholarship to one of the best universities there was. The perfect example for Sasuke to follow, and that's exactly what Sasuke had wanted to do. His parents thought that Itachi was so perfect, because he was. Good looking, smart, he was the perfect icon for Sasuke.
At least... that's what Sasuke had thought at first.
Sasuke at that time hadn't known the full power of the college student, especially a college student with his own apartment. The college student was able to have a double life. Sometimes this wasn't a bad thing at all. One side would go home to mom and dad as the perfect little scholar, the other side would go to the occasional party, maybe have a drink or two. Or the other side had a relationship with someone mom and dad weren't ready to meet, so they kept it hidden.
And sometimes... there were extreme cases.
As soon as that door had closed, as soon as their parents had left, Sasuke became trapped with the true image of his older brother. The older brother he had grown up looking up to, the older brother he had grown up wanting to be just like, the old brother he had asked fifty million questions and had each of them answered with that cool older brother smile. This older brother had been a lie. Either that, or that older brother had completely died.
Sasuke didn't catch onto it at first. Itachi had changed his image, just a bit. He wore contacts now, blood red contacts that he had never worn at home. The way he dressed wasn't too different. Itachi always had a love for black, it was just that now he slipped in some fishnet, or a long jacket that always blew open in the wind, maybe a pair of leather pants that just demanded you to drool right now. But an image change wasn't really a big deal, not really, he changed his look so what?
Sasuke had personally thought it was pretty cool. Maybe he could dress like that too...
Sometimes Itachi had parties, so what? It was college after all. And sure, his parties had made it hard for Sasuke to study with the music and the people and the drinking. But Sasuke remembered that this was his brother, his Itachi, his own little personal hero. So what if he had parties, everyone needed some kind of break. And Itachi had to be tired of being perfect so maybe having parties was his way to break away from that image.
Sometimes... Itachi had people spend the night with him. It wasn't a big deal, really. Sometimes Sasuke would wake up and see a new face. Sometimes Sasuke would go to sleep hearing a new voice. Sometimes it was a girl, sometimes it was a guy, but it didn't matter. It was too much trouble being picky about something like gender, who had time for that kind of thing? Besides, Itachi was more than attractive, way beyond attractive. Who the hell wouldn't want to spend the night with him?
Who the hell... wouldn't want to spend the night...
Sasuke wasn't stupid. He knew what it meant for someone to spend the night with his brother. It sure as hell wasn't to cuddle up together. There were too many different faces and names for it to mean that it was for simple cuddling. Sasuke didn't want to say it but deep down he knew... that his brother slept around. A lot.
But... but so what? Itachi had a lot of partners... big deal. Itachi was still Itachi. Itachi was still his hero, his parent's perfect son. Itachi was still the one he was supposed to follow, who he wanted to follow. Perfect grades, perfect look, just... just perfect.
It had happened without any kind of warning. They had met in such a cliche way. One of those class projects that required more than one person. She had been cute, very cute, with her long blonde pigtails and shy little smile. One of those sweet girls that raised dirty images in your mind because she had to wear her shirts a bit too tightly and her skirts a bit too short. One of those girls that developed quicker than the average girl, made them jealous because she completely skipped training bras and went straight to the real thing. Somehow, despite the wet dream look, she had been cute and sweet, untouched and innocent. One of those girls who didn't realize how good she looked and how hard it was to be close to a girl who looked like her.
She was the first real crush Sasuke had ever had. She had been worth going past the looks to learn more about. She had been worth gathering up courage and asking out, sharing that first kiss, carrying her books and even... smiling. She had been worth it to him.
That had been the final mistake.
It had happened without any kind of warning. They had met in such a cliche way. He had greeted her with a false smile when she came over looking for Sasuke. "He's at our parent's house." Itachi said. "He had to get a few things, but, you can come in and wait." And she had walked in and sat on the couch to wait.
They talked for a bit about school, about the project she and Sasuke were working on. She didn't notice that Itachi's eyes were never on her face as she spoke. The conversation shifted and Itachi whispered the word to her. Boyfriend. She blushed and nodded her head, saying something about thinking of Sasuke as her boyfriend.
She had missed the smirk on Itachi's face.
Maybe it was because he had been bored. Maybe being able to sleep with anyone on his campus had been too boring, too easy. People who were younger, around his brother's age... they were confused, didn't really know what they wanted. They had conflicting emotions when approached by someone in ways that involved kissing, touching, sex. The people in college, the people his own age, oh they knew what they wanted and they wanted it now. That had become much too predictable.
Maybe this girl was just pretty, so very pretty, and the fact that she had someone already...
... not just anyone, but his brother.
Sleeping with someone was one thing. Sleeping with someone who was taken was a bit challenging... but sleeping with someone who belonged to a member of your family? His brother's girlfriend... gods she was gorgeous, much prettier than she was before she admitted to being Sasuke's girlfriend.
She had tried to resist. She had started out saying no. But it was one of those giggling no's. One of those cute little blushes when his hand touched her, slid up her leg in a way Sasuke hadn't done yet, brushed against her chest in a way that made the softest of sounds leave her lips. She was still saying no. But it was one of those shaky no's. One of those no's that Itachi knew he could turn into a yes with just the right look, the right words, the right touch.
And Sasuke had found them in the classic way. He had walked right in on them. His brother sitting on the couch with her in his lap. Her panties thrown carelessly to the floor. Her shirt unbuttoned with his hands roaming over her chest as he moved inside of her. He had insisted that they stayed in the living room, that he couldn't wait to have her, that the bedroom was too far. He had said this while he was rubbing his fingers against her panties, turning her on beyond belief, making her agree to his every word.
He had wanted to be caught.
And when Sasuke had asked, after she had tried to mumble apologies, after Sasuke had decided to take the mature route and not call her ugly names... Itachi just smirked at him.
"Because... I can."
And so he listened. Listened and finally understood. Because after Sasuke had caught them in that moment there was no way he could ever be with anyone without Itachi at least trying. Unless, of course, if Sasuke never showed interest in anyone. It was no fun if Sasuke didn't care about the person, now was it? It was a game, a fun game to Itachi. And it became even more fun when Sasuke had realized what his brother was up to, because then Sasuke started to play along. Unknowingly, of course, but he did. Pretending he liked no one, that only made the game more challenging for Itachi. Oh, but Sasuke was good, very good at the game. He wasn't at first, he could see it in his little brother's eyes, the name of the person he would start to like. But by the time he and Gaara had started to see each other Itachi had been fooled.
Sasuke had done a brilliant job of pretending that Gaara meant nothing.
But Naruto... no, Sasuke had wavered with that boy. And Sasuke hadn't wavered in ages... to do so now... oh, Naruto had to definitely be worth it.
And so... he listened. Listened and... finally... understood. He listened to Sasuke...
... tell this story to Naruto.
And Haku stood and watched Gaara. Watched him stand there with his arms crossed and his eyes closed as he listened. Listened to Sasuke's voice get softer as he finally, finally told someone the truth about himself, about Itachi, about everything. About why he hurt Naruto... why he... broke up with Gaara.
Finally, finally Gaara had a clear answer.
So he listened to Sasuke tell Naruto, "I'm messed up. I'm just a messed up person."
Listened to Naruto respond. "That's not true, Sasuke. That's not true at all." And Gaara could just see the comforting smile on Naruto's face as he held Sasuke close, maybe running his fingers through his hair, but definitely... not letting him go.
Sasuke had finally opened up to Naruto. All that pain Naruto had been through... had just paid off.
And as Haku stood there and watched Gaara push himself off the wall and walk away...
... the song continued on.
Author's Comments: Whew! Jeez, that took forever and a day plus a side of fries and a shake. The muses just would not talk to me for this fic, but when they returned man... did the ideas pour out. So yeah, we finally know the story between Itachi and Sasuke. Itachi you bastard, grrr, but you're still hot.
Oh, can anyone guess who the girl was?
And now Gaara knows the truth too, I thought he needed to hear it. But oi, what's gonna happen with him now I wonder. Caring for Naruto but now knowing that Sasuke probably did really care for him, it was just Itachi. Itachi grrr you bastard (but you're still hot!). And Naruto, go you, not letting Sasuke up. You upset him for a moment, but that had to happen you know?
I really really hope to have the next part out much sooner since this update took months. I think the next chapter may be, well, I don't want to get anyone's hopes up but well... it is the chorus again (if anyone knows the song) so... I want it to be a lemon between Sasuke and Naruto (finally, oi!) but we'll see what the muses say. I mean, I wasn't expecting Sasuke's first love to be well... a girl.
Until next time, hope you liked this chapter!