Disclaimer: I owneth not teen titans or the words to Nobody's Home by Avril Lavigne. This story is dedicated to all the reviewers of my one shot stories and especially to Dark Weezing who was my very first Teen Titans reviewer.

Hand in Hand

Chapter One: Nobody's Home

Nevermore

Raven sat in her room with an emotionless expression on her face. She was staring out of the window towards the horizon above the ocean that surround titan's tower. The dark sun was setting slowly spilling orange light over the bay and into her room.

I couldn't tell you why she felt that way,
She felt it every day,
I couldn't help her,
I just watched her make,
The same mistakes again

Raven Roth was depressed. Really. Not that she ever let anyone see that, she never let anyone see anything beneath her porcelain mask. Around her the darkness that she had wrapped herself in was visible in her sense of style. The walls were dark, the ceiling was black and the carpet was black. The curtains were dark blue and the only light was covered in a twisted and black shade. There was never really any light in there anyway. Her black bed was flanked by towering black bookshelves and statues of huge abnormal crows and ravens and leering masks were hung upon the wall. Raven didn't move a muscle as a breeze wafted in through her open window and made the black fabric that hung behind them flutter wildly as if they had a life of their own.

Her short purple hair was brushed back behind her ears, her amethyst eyes were locked on the invisible marvel that only she could see, her lips were drawn into a straight line.

What's wrong, what's wrong now?
Too many too many problems,
Doesn't know where she belongs,
Where she belongs

She was supposed to be getting ready for an evening out on the town with the other titans beginning with pizza at the food court. She knew that Beast Boy, Terra and Cyborg were supposed to be meeting them there but she, Robin and Starfire were supposed to leave the tower together. She estimated she was already about ten minutes late. She knew that they would be annoyed, well maybe not Starfire she's too happy to be annoyed at anything and Robin well he was always very understanding. But no one could understand her now she thought bitterly her brows creasing into a frown suddenly. No one could understand her anyway. She guessed that Beast Boy and Terra would be slightly put out if she made the others late; she doubted Cyborg would mind, it just meant more pizza for him.

She'd just give it a miss this time she thought finally turning away from the window. Maybe she's venture to the plain of nevermore and try and get to the root of all of her problems. She was beginning to think that her depression was being caused by internal factors as well as external ones. She thought that if she didn't show up downstairs then the others would go with her, it wasn't like they cared anyway. She sighed to herself and then got up. She dusted off her cloak as she rose. She walked over to her side cabinet and picked up the familiar beauty mirror that lay there. It was an ornamental mirror and she didn't use it that often, the dark claw like spikes rose up from the thin frame and seemed to look like demon horns. That thought made her shudder slightly.

She wants to go home,
But nobody's home,
It's where she lies,
Broken inside

Raven pursed her lips and raised the mirror to her face. She saw herself in the depths of the silver glass and stared nonchalantly at her pale reflection, even now to her, her skin still seemed to be ash grey, it was like she didn't have the will to have colour in her. No one was going to look close enough to see that anyway she reminded herself sternly.

She heard shuffling heading up the corridor towards her room. Glancing at her closed door she shook her head, she doubted that they were coming to find her, someone had obviously forgotten something, it was bound to be something along those lines.

With that final depressing thought, Raven Roth vanished into her mirror taking with her all the trials and tribulations that she hid from the world at large.

There's no place to go,
No place to go,
To dry her eyes,
Broken inside

It was surprisingly empty and dark in her mind when she got there. The stars had all been covered with thick grey clouds that loomed dangerously over the rocky land. Long shadows stretched across the ground hiding the broken stones that littered the path.

Raven levitated into the air and began to make her way down the winding path towards the stony arches. As she went the black crows and ravens alighted onto the dying trees around her and cawed sadly their red eyes staring endlessly at into space.

She ignored them as she walked past, the large beaks of the younger birds opening in silent protest as she made her way towards the gate that led into the other sides of her mind.

"Raven..." they called in child-like voices that echoed eerily in the cold air, "Come back..."

Again Raven ignored them. She dipped to the floor and picked her way through the cracks and twigs. Sighing in trepidation she began walking forward a lot more quickly. She wasn't eager to go anywhere special but it was not normal for one to feel uncomfortable in one's own mind.

Open your eyes,
And look outside,
Find the reasons why,
You've been rejected,
And now you can't find what you've left behind

Her mind just didn't seem to fit her right she thought, wincing when that thought was broadcast through nevermore loudly so that everyone would hear it whether they wanted to or not. "What's wrong with me!" she implored the black sky tilting her head back and glaring at the nothingness that stretched out before her.

There were three main reasons for the depressive state that Raven Roth currently found herself in and she was ashamed to admit them even to herself. Maybe she feared others would look at her less, maybe that it would make her less of a person than she already was. She didn't know.

She reflected on the harshness of her own semi-human life as she neared the first arch that was the gateway to her happiness.

The first reason for her sad predicament being the fact that she felt as if Terra was pushing her out. The other titans had known Terra for only a year or so and already she was much more widely accepted than her. She was better friends with the others, Raven worried that maybe, the titans might forget about her if she wasn't there anymore.

Be strong, be strong now,
Too many, too many problems,
Doesn't know where she belongs,
Where she belongs

The second reason was her emotions were too easy to control. Normally she had to meditate for hours a day to suppress them, but now she hardly had to bother. It seemed as if with each day that passed her by, her emotions were turning to dust. Even internally or in her dreams she felt empty. As if there was a hole that was continuously growing inside of her. It unnerved her.

She wants to go home,
But nobody's home,
It's where she lies,
Broken inside

The third and final reason being the most important. She was all alone. Her loneliness was the hardest thing she had ever had to deal with, and to make it worse, she had to deal with it on her own. She couldn't tell the others, she was...she should say she was embarrassed but even that was hard for her to express. She was just too proud. The loneliness stemmed from the fact that she saw love and true, deep friendship before her everyday and she had to go to sleep every night knowing that she would never be a part of it, that she would never experience that kind of compassion for herself.

There's no place to go,
No place to go,
To dry her eyes,
Broken inside

Without truly realising it she passed under the first arch. She paused when the scenery suddenly changed, like the shifting sands in a sand glass. The field was darker than usual, she noted dryly, the sky was heavy almost overcast and there was no sunshine, all of the colours had been dulled down and glossed over with a pale grey. She looked around herself trying to find her happiness but it was nowhere to be seen.

Even as she stood there the sky darkened and more shadows appeared, a dead wind rippled through the area barely moving the blades of grass under her feet. She looked down, there were no flowers anymore, it was all just dark green grass. And even that didn't look healthy.

Her feelings she hides,
Her dreams she can't find,
She's losing her mind,
She's falling behind,
She can't find her place,
She's losing her faith,
She's falling from grace,
She's all over the place...

"What's wrong here?" she whispered aloud. She looked up and about herself, "Where did my happiness go?" she asked herself, the thought moved almost sluggishly through her head as if it was tired.

Maybe her depression was worse than she thought. She wondered if it was like this in every corner of nevermore.

She glanced behind her; she thought for a moment that she had seen a glimpse of something, like ghost moving through hell, just a sharp quick glimpse in her peripheral vision. "Happiness?"

She wants to go home,
But nobody's home,
It's where she lies,
Broken inside

"Raven..." called a voice which unmistakably her own, "Raven...help me..."

She whirled around to confront her happy emotion, but she couldn't see anything except a shadow that seemed to disappear as she looked at it, "Happiness? What's wrong with this place?"

The shadow of herself mouthed something as she faded, but Raven couldn't work it out. Raven took a step forward but the effort was in vain because as she did, the shadow blew away like smoke in the wind.

There's no place to go,
No place to go,
To dry her eyes,
Broken inside

Raven stared at the spot where her emotion had been and at the same time she felt the hole inside herself grow bigger.

Raven?

Raven's eyes widened as she heard the familiar voice, she was caught then, torn between the decision to stay in her mind and see if it was the same throughout nevermore, she had already lost happiness she didn't want to lose anything else, and the decision to go back out of the mirror and stop the titans from discovering the darker corners of her own private world.

Raven? Are you in here?

Raven looked up at the sky and then back across the darkened expanse of land that would lead her into her next emotional state.

She's lost inside, lost inside

Raven?

Her eyes narrowed in consternation, why couldn't they just stay out of her room, they seemed content to stay out of every other angle and aspect of her morbid life, such as it was...why was her room so important to them?

Hey, cool mirror...

"Fool." Spat Raven suddenly swinging her cloak around her body expressively and vanishing in swirl of dark and ice-cold mist.

She's lost inside, lost inside