Birthday Gift

A/N: Just a one-shot I came up with while I was bound and determined to write a Wanda/Toad fic.  So here it is.

Disclaimer: The people who own Evo are certainly not me.


            "Get out of here you amphibious freak!"

            With those words of encouragement from his lady love, Todd set off to the mall.  Wanda's birthday was only a day away and he had to find the perfect present that fully expressed his undying affection.  And that wasn't too expensive.  He didn't exactly have a steady income.

            The first store he tried was very New Agey.  He had thought it would be perfect, but was quickly disillusioned when he told the smiling clerk he was looking for a present for his witch friend.

            "That term has negative vibes," she waved her hands around as if to demonstrate, "'Wiccan' is much more positive."  No matter how Todd tried to convince her that Wanda was not a Wiccan, just a witch, she didn't listen.  He finally gave up and asked for suggestions on a gift.

            "She would probably enjoy some incense…or a set of crystals…we have a sale on altars and statuettes," she offered with a helpful smile.  He returned her smile, displaying all of his less-than-perfect teeth.  New Age Clerk was less eager to help him after that.

            The next store he went to sold nothing but cowboy hats.  While he enjoyed trying them on and pretending to be an outlaw, he couldn't really picture Wanda wearing one.  Except in his daydreams, but that didn't count.

            He moved on through kitchen appliances, which didn't particularly suit Wanda's disposition; the Gap, which was a definite 'no' since Wanda was known to Hex any Gap clothing on sight; and a bookstore, but he didn't know what kind of books Wanda liked to read.

            It took a lot of self-control not to buy a present at the video game store.  The new Mortal Kombat was in, and he came very close to drooling on it.  But then he managed to remember this was a present for Wanda. Not Todd. Wanda.

            He took a break when he reached the food court, buying a slice of pizza and a soda.  He leaned back in his chair and pondered while he chewed.  This was exhausting.  How could he choose a present?  He knew next to nothing about Wanda, besides what she didn't like.  And that wasn't a significant amount of help.

            The day was three-quarters past when he finally came to the perfect store.  A chocolate shop.  Everyone likes chocolate.  Chocolate was romantic.  Chocolate was tasty.  It was perfect!  The only thing that was not perfect was the prices.  Actually, the prices were fine.  It was the comparison of the prices to his savings that was decidedly not perfect.

            This was inconceivable.  He had at last found his present.  And he couldn't buy it.  He stood in the store and puzzled.  He puzzled for quite a long time.  How could he give Wanda chocolates he couldn't afford? He could steal them…but she wouldn't like that.  She never liked it when he tried to steal things for her.  He could steal someone's wallet then pay for them.  Same problem.  The clerks were giving him strange looks.  But his puzzling paid off.


            A large explosion of clanging and crashing woke Wanda.  She glared at the clock. What is he doing at two in the morning? She briefly considered going downstairs and Hexing him into next Tuesday but decided against it.  Too much trouble.  She rolled over and pressed her pillow over her ears.


            "Mine next!" Todd leaped forward and shoved his misshapen present into Wanda's lap.  His hands looked like a mummy's…all his fingers shoddily bandaged.  But if they hurt from whatever he had done to them, it didn't show.  He was grinning mindlessly and his eyes were shining with excitement.  Wanda sighed.  There was no way around it.  She had to open it.  Pulling off ribbon and paper she peered suspiciously at it.  Last time she had received a present from Toad it had been a grass snake from the yard.  That hadn't been pleasant.  For either of them.

            There was so much tape she was having a difficult time getting it loose.  But she persevered.  Finally she came upon a slightly squashed white box with a large red heart pasted on.  Rolling her eyes she pulled off the lid.

            It was full of chocolates.  On closer inspection she surmised that they were supposed to be heart shaped.  She picked one up and scrutinized it cautiously.  Did she really trust anything Toad had made?  The gift-giver was so excited he was humming shrilly under his breath.  Screwing up her courage, Wanda shut her eyes and popped it into her mouth.

            The room was hushed.  Todd held his breath waiting for her reaction.  Pietro readied himself to dial 9-1-1 if she keeled over.  After a few agonizing moments of silence, she opened her eyes.  They were shocked.

            "This is really good," she said, voice full of surprise.

            "YES!" Todd leaped into the air with joy.  She liked them! She really liked them! The burns on his fingers from the oven, the calluses on his palm from stirring so long, the exhaustion from staying up all night making batch after batch until it was perfect…all worth it! Wanda liked them!  He landed, filled with euphoria.  Wanda licked her lips, then leaned over.  She placed a hand on his arm.

            "Thank you." She said, meeting his eyes and not trying to kill him for the first time.


Chocolate! R n' R!