Title: There Isn't Time... For You or Me
Rating: PG 13
Pairing: SatoshixDaisuke .
Warnings: Slightly AU; Spoilers. Angst. Maybe a little OoC on everyone's part. IMPORTANT NOTE: I think I kind of switched some volumes of Mangas around, like V.4 before V.3. Real Sorry!
Disclaimer: I do not own DN Angel. pout
Summary: Satoshi has to move to America for a while. He has exactly one week before he leaves. Can he tell Daisuke how he feels before then? In this chapter, Daisuke thinks about Satoshi and pays him a visit to say good-bye.
Status: Complete series 9/9.
Chapter Eight: Daisuke's Goodbye
Niwa Daisuke couldn't concentrate on school that Tuesday morning. Instead of paying attention to the teacher up front, he was often glazing at the empty desk closest to the window. To others, it may appear as though he was staring out onto the courtyard, but he was actually thinking about the former occupant that once sat there.
-- Do you think that Hiwatari-kun will be happy where he's going ?-- he asked out of the blue, fully aware that Dark was awake (and not sleeping, as usual). The Phantom Thief was silent for a while.
Dark wanted to say something, but he wasn't sure he should; he didn't know how Daisuke would take it. The truth was Dark didn't think that Satoshi would be happy anywhere without Daisuke.
(( Hopefully, )) he replied at long last. Daisuke almost thought that he wasn't listening to him.
-- I hope he has more friends, -- Daisuke said, putting his head down but still looking at the sunlit desk. -- He barely spoke to anyone here, but I'm sure he'll get acquainted. -- Even though Daisuke was in pain, he still on the more optimistic side. It reminded Dark of something.
(( Do you remember what Daiki-san said after we stole the Agate Links?))
Daisuke thought about it for a while. -- That we lie… to make people happy…? – he asked quietly, uncertain. Dark nodded.
(( Yeah. Dai-chan, it's okay to do it for everyone else, but don't it for yourself, all right? …It's okay to be honest… and just accept things as they are, you know?))
Daisuke sank his head further into the cushion of his arms resting on the desk. He allowed himself to look into the reality of the situation and at once felt hot tears cloud his vision. -- Hiwatari-kun's leaving, -- he whispered, letting the fact sink in. -- I… I don't want him to go.--
Dark's wings embraced Daisuke's small frame. ((Neither do I, Dai-chan.))
There was that time when Satoshi had managed to separate Dark from Daisuke using the Sage of Sleep. When Daisuke was in agony of being without his other half, Satoshi saw what he had done, and he apologized profusely. Even then, Satoshi himself looked like he was in equal pain. Was it because Daisuke was hurting too? Or did he just feel remorse for what he had done, taking away Daisuke's "most precious thing"? Whatever it was, it felt like it was happening again. Daisuke felt like something was being torn away from him, and he wondered if Satoshi felt it too as he packed.
As Daisuke spent his lunch on the roof, he wondered how Satoshi could have ever eaten there alone before he came along. There was absolutely no one to talk to, or even see. The only comfort available was the sun, the cool breeze, and the biting stone all around. He remembered following the blue haired teen up here one time, wondering where he had always disappeared to for lunch.
Satoshi sat right at the eastern corner, his back to the sun. He had a small paper bag with bread inside, and beside it, a bottle of water. Daisuke poked his head through the roof door, watching the other teen sympathetically.
-- Does he always eat up here alone?-- he wondered before stepping out. Dark shrugged.
((Go ask the creepy boy.))
Dark used to be so mean to Satoshi. Daisuke supposed it was a sign of affection.
((Is not!)) Dark interjected in feigned indignation. Daisuke shook his head. Someone was in denial.
The red head approached the other teen rather cautiously. Hell, he was afraid that Satoshi would just cuff him to the security fence around the ledge and call the police (no matter how ridiculous that sounded). Satoshi saw him coming but didn't say anything, instead just watching him with his calculating azure gaze.
"Anou, Hiwatari-kun, may I join you?" Daisuke asked, smiling nervously. He could have sworn that Satoshi's lips quirked up in a delicate smile (in amusement or pleasure, he wasn't sure).
"Of course," he replied, spectacles flashing briefly as he moved over. Daisuke took a seat beside him and started to pull out his lunch.
"My mom likes to pack a lot of food. I was wondering if we could share," he said as he pulled out two containers. He placed them down and looked at Satoshi, who still had his unwavering gaze on him. Daisuke's nervousness began to increase.
((If he jumps you, it's not my fault,)) Dark said lazily, preparing to go to sleep. Daisuke blushed and turned away from Satoshi.
-- Shut up! -- he exclaimed, embarrassed. -- Hiwatari-kun wouldn't do that! --
((Just like how he wouldn't dress up as a woman to trap us?))
Daisuke had no response for that. Satoshi was indeed a very capricious person, but he highly doubted that 'jumping Daisuke' would be on his To Do list. Heh. Right?
"You don't have to worry," Satoshi suddenly said, startling Daisuke out of his thoughts. "I made a promise." He looked at him.
"Eh?" the clueless red head asked. Satoshi only smiled.
"I don't plan on breaking it…"
-- A promise? -- "Oh! Right." Daisuke returned Satoshi's smile with a bigger grin. -- Not to go after me when I'm… 'me'. --
" … Not yet, anyway," the Commander added as an afterthought. Daisuke saw a mischievous glint in Satoshi's eyes as he looked away.
Dark had teased Daisuke mercilessly for days.
Daisuke still didn't know what Satoshi meant, but he had a feeling that Dark did, and that wasn't a good thing (since Dark only had perverted thoughts). However, for a moment, Daisuke actually enjoyed it. It wasn't so much as the attention, but the fact that Satoshi was being more open with him enough to make jokes (or innuendos; there was a lot of that going around). They were getting somewhere in their rather hesitant relationship.
But how did he feel about Satoshi? While the blue haired teen was always being forward, Daisuke often withdrew, feeling uncomfortable. Perhaps it was because he thought that he loved Riku.
Daisuke munched slowly on his sushi made with crabmeat. He remembered it to be the other teen's favorite, and that day Daisuke went home to ask his mom to make more. He looked down at his chopsticks. Every little thing just reminded him of Satoshi. How was his sanity supposed to survive?
The other day he went to tell the other teen how he really felt, but it ended up in disaster.
Perhaps Satoshi wasn't meant to stay.
Daisuke turned and looked past the fence, catching a glimpse of the outlining of Satoshi's condominium. The white walls gleamed desolately among the colored, more lively buildings surrounding it. If he was meant to go, was this really goodbye, then?
Dark remained quiet as he left the red head to his thoughts. He knew the very moment that Krad emerged Satoshi couldn't be around them anymore.
The final bell rang, signaling the end of the school day. The students were starting to clear out, leaving Daisuke alone in a rather empty hallway. He was at his locker, placing his unneeded books inside, but his mind was elsewhere; it had been for the whole week.
The red head was torn out of his daze by the sweet voice. He turned to the speaker and smiled as best as he could. "Hey, Riku-san," he replied somewhat cheerfully. Riku looked unconvinced, though.
"You've kind of spacey lately," she said in concern. "Are you upset… about Hiwatari-kun?"
Daisuke couldn't look into her sympathetic brown eyes anymore or pretend to be his 'normal' self. He didn't want her to see the pain growing with every passing second until midnight that night. Instead, he just tried to evade her question. "It really won't be the same without him," he replied, gazing at the tips of her hair brushing against her skin. "Don't you think?"
Riku didn't say anything for a while. Curious, Daisuke tentatively made eye contact. He didn't expect to see tears. "Riku-san, why are you crying?" he asked worriedly. It was the umpteenth time he made her cry.
"Remember when you got sick that one day in school?" she said, ignoring his question and sniffling slightly. Daisuke thought back on it and recalled the event. He had refused to come out, and Dark had taken control over his body. Something happened and Dark passed out.
"Yes," he replied. That was also the day when Riku said she loved him, and he couldn't be with her because of his feelings for Satoshi…
"Before I came in, Hiwatari-kun was with you. He took you there that morning." She paused and wiped the fresh streams of tears flowing down her cheeks. "I didn't understand what he was saying at first, but then he said that there wasn't time for the both of you. Do you know… what that means?"
((No time?)) Dark echoed slowly. ((So he knew about Krad… and what he had to do.)) The Kaitou seemed lost in thought.
-- Wait, what are you talking about?-- Daisuke said, confused. -- What are you saying?--
((I'm saying that Hiwatari knew about everything! He means to leave, Dai-chan. There's nothing we can do about it.))
Daisuke's heart fell with painful realization. Suddenly, he heard it. It was very faint, almost as if it wasn't there… but it was. He remembered Satoshi saying it.
'I am a Hikari, one of the many reasons why we can't be together, even just to be friends. …I'll be leaving soon. I'm not sure for how long, and I don't know if I'll be able to even see you again.'
'There isn't time… for you or me.'
"Daisuke-kun?" Riku questioned softly. "Are you okay?"
The red head snapped out of his daze and gazed at her for a long moment, collecting his thoughts. Satoshi meant everything he said. He was really going to leave. "Arigatou, Riku-san," he whispered. Quickly, Daisuke turned and left without another word, sprinting down the hall as if his life depended on it. Sparkles of crystalline tears glimmered sorrowfully in his wake. Riku could only watch after him.
"Hey," said Risa, stepping beside her sister and touching her shoulder. "Are you going to be okay?"
Riku nodded and turned to her twin, smiling cheerfully; it didn't meet her eyes. "Yeah," she replied. "I'll try."
Thanks to Daisuke's great stamina, he was able to make it to Satoshi's place by six. He looked up at the tall complex, instantly scanning for Satoshi's window. Was there still light in there? Had the blue haired teen already left to the airport hotel? There was only one way to find out. Running inside, he skipped the elevator and went straight for the stairwell. After about four flights, Daisuke arrived on the third floor and went to the door that he remembered as being Satoshi's. He vaguely noticed that the wall was as good as new.
-- Should I knock?-- he asked, looking at the blank door. Daisuke suddenly became very nervous. What was he going to do? There wasn't much he could do if Satoshi wasn't there.
((Try the doorbell.)) Dark suggested. Daisuke complied, the 'bzzt' of the buzzer going off in the otherwise silent hall. He waited for about thirty long seconds (he knew; he was counting), and there was no reply. His heart fell with dread and disappointment. Was he too late?
Feeling guilty but desperate, Daisuke quickly bent over the card-reading lock and began to hack into it, using the key pad. With a quiet 'click' and a flash of a green light, the door opened. Daisuke saw a pair of dark blue house slippers.
-- Oh crap!-- Slowly, the red head looked up, blushing wildly with embarrassment. His gaze met tentatively with azure orbs glittering with a hint of amusement.
"Niwa-kun," Satoshi said, smiling slightly. "What a pleasant surprise."
Daisuke abruptly stepped away, feeling like a five year old that got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "H-hi, Hiwatari-kun. Was I bothering you?" he asked, feeling like he was intruding. – Crap! I was bothering him! – he thought.
((Stop worrying. No, you weren't.))
Satoshi ran a hand through his pale locks, his glasses off. "No, it's fine. I was taking a nap. It takes me a while to get up."
Daisuke nodded in understanding. "Right."
They stood there in awkward silence for a while. Daisuke half wanted to be invited inside and half wanted to stay out. He didn't want to see the blank walls even emptier and colder than they usually were. He didn't want to see sealed boxes, secured furniture or packed suitcases, but he at least wanted to be in there one last time with Satoshi. It could… very well be his last.
"Did you want to come inside?" Satoshi asked quietly. "There's still time."
Daisuke looked up into resigned azure colored eyes. -- Time? No, Hiwatari-kun; there isn't any left. Not for me, anyway.-- He shook his head. "No. I'll only be a second… to say good-bye."
There was a brief flicker of emotion on the other teen's face, but Daisuke was too distracted in his thoughts to notice. Instead, he just looked at Satoshi's chest, staring at the black colored material.
"I – hope you like it there," he began slowly, meeting the other's gaze every now and then; he couldn't stand to lock gazes for more than two seconds. "It's not everyday that you get to go to America." It was becoming harder for him to form words over the growing lump in his throat. "I suppose we'll just see each other again later, then." Daisuke managed a smile with great difficulty. He knew that it must look pathetic, but there wasn't much that he could do about it.
Several more minutes of silence ticked by. Daisuke was at a loss of what else to say or do, save one. He rushed over to Satoshi and gave him a hug, the tightest one he could muster. He held him like how a frightened child might hug his teddy bear; and like such, Daisuke was afraid that they might forget each other. He wanted to at least imprint the feel of his body against his, and savor the warmth that he sought after for so long. For the brief amount of time that flew by, he couldn't think of a more perfect moment in his life. Satoshi's arms wrapped around him, almost tentatively, but it was enough. Tears pricked at Daisuke's eyes and he held him closer.
"Niwa-kun --" Satoshi's voice sounded strained, but he was interrupted when Daisuke pulled back and silenced him with a finger to his lips and a sad smile.
"I think that if you say something," he whispered, "you'll just make it harder for me." Glossy crimson orbs looked up into similar blue ones, and everything that never was and never could be flashed between them. "Aishiteru, Satoshi-kun. Sore ja matta." Slowly, Daisuke slid his finger away and replaced it with the soft touch of his lips.
After several blissful seconds, Dark gently pulled away and opened his eyes. Satoshi looked up at him with a terribly sad expression, his cheeks damp with thick rivulets of tears. The thief wiped at them tenderly.
Satoshi seemed somewhat startled. "Dark, where's--?"
Dark rolled his eyes in good nature. "Are you really that dense, Satoshi?" he asked teasingly, smiling. More tears fell from the blue haired teen's eyes, and again, Dark brushed them away. "Come on, stop that," he added half-heartedly.
"I don't think I can leave now," Satoshi said, leaning against his doorframe sullenly. Right when he found love, he was forced to lose it; such was the curse of the Hikaris.
"Well, then… don't leave," Dark suggested, winking. "But if you do, then you'll just have to catch me later." With that, the Phantom Thief walked away. After all, this had happened before. ((He's a striking image of his grandfather.))
Dark sidestepped the sleeping guards littering the museum's floor, tsk-ing at the pathetic-ness of the whole police department, but with Satoshi gone, it was now even more so. Thankfully, he didn't run into that girl, though. What he said the other night might have gotten to her.
((You okay, Dai-chan? You're awfully quiet,)) Dark said in concern as he leisurely made his way to the room holding the Angel of Redemption. He was in no hurry since he had nothing to worry about: regrettably.
-- I'm just thinking, -- came Daisuke's solemn reply, and he really was thinking. -- When we're done, do you think that we could go to the airport just to see him off?--Dark smiled. ((Yeah.)) With that in mind, he quickened his pace to the next room. The moonlight cascaded through the large floor to ceiling windows, casting some ethereal light onto the painting in the shadows. He began to approach his target, but the faint rustle of wings stopped him. A glimmer of white caught the corner of his eye, and he turned to it, his heart immediately beating with anticipation. ((Could it be…?))
Wings of pure white stretched almost boastingly. The blonde haired angel stepped out and smirked, a small, pretty energy ball forming in his right hand. "Dark-san," he greeted curtly.
"Hikari…" Dark returned, grinning. Intense joy suddenly spread throughout his entire body. "I see that you've decided to show up."
The ball disappeared, and Krad flicked some hair out of his face, but it swished right back to where it was. He gave a smug expression. "Satoshi-sama came to a realization, and that, in turn, made him transform into me."
Dark chuckled. "I thought so."
"What does that mean?"
"I mean, how can a Hikari resist a Niwa?"
Golden orbs gave off amusement, but there was also a rather sad look in them as well. "Yes, how can we?" he whispered thoughtfully.
Dark noticed his serious tone, but he didn't want to think about that. Not now. "I was only kidding. If it helps… we can't resist you either." Quickly, Dark stole the painting and made a bee line for the exit, hoping that Krad was only momentarily distracted. He carefully extracted the painting from its frame and rolled it up, placing it in a silver tube his mom made him use. The thief had secured it before he got to the roof.
He finally felt alive. It was this chase, this person that he was meant for.
A flurry of white wings tackled him from behind, and he fell with an 'oomph.' The two members from rival clans rolled on the cement ground, fighting for control. Finally, Krad had Dark pinned underneath him, the thief's wrists on either side of his head. Dark huffed indignantly.
"Damn it," he cursed out. Krad's hair fell over his face, and he tried blowing them away with no effect. The blonde strands tickled his skin. "Do you mind?"
"No, not really," Krad said, smiling softly. More seriously, he added, "We were supposed to leave, you know."
Violet eyes gazed into gold ones. "Yeah. In a way, you should have, but I'm glad that you didn't."
"This can't ever work."
"I know that already, but I still had hope for Daisuke… and Satoshi."
"Oh my God! Satoshi's back!"
"He scared me so bad! I thought he was actually leaving!
"I think he almost did."
"So then… what made him stay?"
Come Thursday, the 8th grade class was buzzing with Hiwatari Satoshi's return (well, at least the girls were). The teachers were thrilled as well, glad that their best and brightest student was back. Saehara was happy too; for he said that his dad was going to crack under the pressure of being the Commander, but he also enjoyed Satoshi's (more quiet and subtle) company.
From his seat, Daisuke looked to his right, looking at the desk by the window. It was no longer empty; for Satoshi sat there, silently reading, right where he belonged. The blue haired teen seemed to notice his gaze because he looked up, meeting Daisuke's eyes warmly. Even though their situation was more complicated now, they could still enjoy each other's company the way they wanted to.
There was still time.
Heh. Corny end? SORRY! I really tried to make this chapter work! Did it? Please review! I wanted to make a sequel, but sequels usually suck, so I was thinking, 'Nah, nevermind.' But on a happier note, I have an idea for a new story. I can work on that without feeling guilty.
I know I put the rating as 'R', but it wasn't. Sorry again. I just didn't want to get kicked out again for mislabeling my stories.
Thank you all and much love from me!