Ella held the mobile phone in her hand. "How do you use this?" Ella asked her husband, Prince Charmont. This, of course, made her Princess of Frell and she was thoroughly proud of her position. Her daughter Greavi, and her son Cheval were running around at her feet.
"Mum, come and play ball with us," Cheval said, tugging on Ella's dress. "It's no fun if you give me one for a present and then don't come play." Greavi backed her brother up by nodding.
"Not now, dear, I've got paperwork to do," she said, gesturing to Char, a pile of papers and the mobile phone. When they'd gone, she turned to Char. "Is a mobile phone paperwork?"
"It's a thing you use to call your friend, dear," Char said, demonstrating for her as he clicked the buttons and made a call. The line rang on Ella's bedside phone and she picked it up.
"Hello?" Prince Char tried.
Ella dropped her bedside phone as if it were red hot. "It's a scam, right? If you want to talk to me, why not do it face-to-face rather than line-to-line. My husband has such a tight hold on things."
"Meaning I have a tight hold?" Char laughed.
"Well, yes, exactly," Ella whispered. "And I wish you'd give it up. I hate scams. You know I do. I'd have never agreed to marriage if my kingdom hadn't been in danger."
"So you hate me?" Char asked, thunderstruck. She'd been so cool then – at the wedding – and now she was going back on her vows. "Look, remember all those words you said? The vicar told me you can't go back on them, and I hope you'll stay with me forever."
"Of course I will," Ella giggled.
"But you just said..." Char stopped. "You can talk to gnomes, right? So talk gnomish to me. I'd love to hear you speak it to me. We can make love after-wards if you'd like."
"Not...not the horrible way," Ella said sharply, drawing two short sharp breaths. "We've done it twice already. It's always ended with me in pain. I am not in a hurry to do it again, really."
"No, I mean kiss and then order a pizza and then a poem," said Char in a calm voice.
Ella's eyes lit up.
Okay, I'm for that!"