I own no characters. 7/26/04 THis is for everyone who gave me nice emials and reviews, ever! you all rock:) Love ya!
I wrote this 2/5/04, for the episode, "Your Welcome" I know there's been a lot, but, o well.
I saw her, it was like my heart was caught in my throat, it was choking me. All my love started coming back to me, like in waves, in an ocean, drowning me.
"Cordelia, I…" What could I say? 'I love you'? 'Please don't go'? 'Why?'. she looked into my eyes, and put her hand on my cheek. "Angel, shhh…" She said, her voice losing it's happy chipper tone. "But" "No, we'll be together again." she said, and I knew how'd it all end.
I'm not sure who started crying first. Maybe it wasn't so much as started, but just a long pause in-between. Does it even matter?
"Don't worry, everything will be fine" she smiles sadly, but I remove her hand from my cheek. How can everything be fine! I want to scream, but the words die on my tongue. I guess it's just like before, with Doyle, and when Buffy died. Or Darla… but now she's just been added to the list, I can't help but feel betrayed. She's leaving, it will NEVER be fine! Everyone leaves, so why should I care about her going too? Why? How? The answer is so simple, but so hard to say. It's because I love her.
It's very different from Buffy and I had, no that was just raw hormones, carved into a fantasy of never will. Though I did want Buffy, I may have even been worthy of her, but it wasn't what I had with Cordelia.
No, what I had with Cordelia was more closely related to what I had with Darla. A love that lasts, that only grows stronger with death. But I digress, for Cordelia notices I've gone into 'brood mode'.
"Angel?" she asks, and I remember how everything was with her. It was special, form her light conversation, to her drawn out kisses. How could the most important woman in my life leave, with me trying to stop it?
"Cordelia don't, just stay with me" I know the request is too much to ask, her sad smile shows me, she knows I agree. She takes my hand, in her two smaller ones. We lock stares. She wants to stay, I know it, she even tells me so. "Angel, I have too. I came back to, well, set you on your path. That way, you won't become a Wolfram & Hart deploy. I did, and now I know you and the gang will be ok" she smiles at me, it burns.
"But, Corde," "Angel, don't" she puts a finger to my lips. Tears spill down both our faces. "Don't make this any harder than it has to be" We'll all be together in the end" She pulls away, and starts to walk out the door.
"Trust me?" She comes back in. Now I smile. "Always". She goes to leave, but stops this time before she reaches the door.
She runs up to me, and we embrace in a kiss. But it's more than that. It's our everything. Our every feeling, dream, and desire. It's our fears, our lust, our worries. But most of all, it's us. She pulls back slightly. "Then believe, that we'll be togethter, and that I love you" She says then disappears. "I believe" I say, and walk out of the room.
Tell me what ya think? thanks for reading! :)