The reason im writing this is i don't feel that there's enough Orlin/Sam on the web so i thought considering im in love with Orlin, then i'll write a fic.

Disclaimer: Just like i've said before i do not own stargate and i never will. Its a crap reality but very true. Also i don't own the song Iris it belongs to the goo goo dolls who i also don't own.

Summery: Orlin thinks about his feelings about Sam while listening to her radio.

I Want You To Know Who I Am.


Orlin walked into the kitchen and turns on the radio.

( And I'd give up forever to touch you, Cause I know that you feel me somehow )

I know you can see me but you cant touch me in the way i want you to touch me and i can't hold you the way i want to hold you. I know that when you look at me you don't know what to say or do.

Id gladly give up today, tomorrow, my whole life just to touch you one more time. To feel the warmth of your pale skin or even the softness of your lips, it would be worth it.

( You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be, And I don't want to go home right now )

I know that one day i will have to leave you alone but i pray that day wont come soon. I wanted to watch you and learn about you. The things you enjoy, love and the things you crave for. You are something of a mystery but a beautiful one which i long to figure and piece together.

I just hope that you wont make me leave and vanish from your life forever.

( And all I can taste is this moment, And all I can breathe is your life, And sooner or later it's over, I just don't want to miss you tonight )

I watch you sleep at night and resist the urge to lay by you. I smell your sweet essence which you leave where you go and just hope that when you leave you will come back. I sit on the edge of the bed when you leave and lay my head on your pillow, i breathe in what you leave behind.

( And I don't want the world to see me, Cause I don't think that they'd understand )

I know i refuse to reveal myself to your friends but they don't understand me like you do. I didn't come all this way for them to see me, i came all this way for you to see me and know me. They wouldn't understand what i feel for you, they wouldn't understand why i've been stalking you, so to speak.

( When everything's made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am )

I know that if i was revealed to them then i would have to leave you and i couldn't face the fact that i had to let you go. I don't want to hurt you or scare you all i want is for you to see me and learn about me just like i long to learn about you.

There is so much we could teach each other and time we could share.

( And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming, Or the moment of truth in your lies )

I know that if you weren't intrested then you wouldn't of come for a walk with me. You wouldv'e handed me in by now. I can see through the lies when you say you don't like me and i know that you feared for me when i went through the gate, when i gave up everything for you. I couldn't see you hurt.

( When everything feels like the movies, Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive )

I never knew that my body could hurt so much or that a heart can feel more pain. It hurt to leave you, it hurt to see you sad but i knew by doing this that you were safe. I knew that i had protected you from harm and that i will always have a picture of you smiling in my head.

( And I don't want the world to see me, Cause I don't think that they'd understand )

The truth is Sam i've never left you and i never will. I still watch you sleep at night and i watch you when your working making sure your safe. I know that i can no longer save you or guarantee your safety but hell knows that i wish and pray that you're safe everyday. Im still here Sam.

( When everything's made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am )

I touched you only hours ago only you didn't feel it cause well lets face it, to you im dead. I broke all the rules just to get one last touch of your skin, to smell your hair one last time but you didn't feel me or hear me. I wish you could see me one more time, i want to know how you feel and if your happy.

I watch you work in your lab. You look so tired and pale but i know you're ok. I kiss you on the cheek and how i wish you could feel it and respond to it but you cant. It hurts to know that i cant be part of your life so im just going to go. I wish i didn't but i need to. I walk to the other side of your desk and look at you directly in the eyes, you eyes make contact with mine but you don't know it. You don't know that i can see you beautiful blue eyes shine. I walk back round to you and brush your face with my hand but you cant feel me. I leave and disappear who knows it might be for good.

Sam looked up from her desk, she felt a chill on her face.

"Orlin ?"