PRE-A/N: This story was inspired by being very bored during rehearsals of the school musical back at the end of April, which was A FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO THE FORUM. Don't get too worried that this is serious, it's not. Not even a little. It probably won't be more that about three chaps, if that. It's short, and kinda hokey,

Disclaimer: I don't own X-men, I had no part in putting together Evo, and I don't own any of the rights to A FUNNY THING... I even changed the names of the people I know that are featured here (but not much) so as to protect the so-called innocent.

And away we go!

Rogue wondered, for the hundred millionth time, how she had gotten roped into this. She sighed as she waited back stage during rehearsal, pulling on the itchy elastic waist of her sequined, billowy harem-pants costume with her thumbs. She was almost positive it was a Princess Jasmine outfit, bought straight from the Disney Store. How had she gotten here?

Oh, yeah. She had been recruited for this musical because Ms. White had used her in the one last year; Dracula. Now Rogue was an Arabic courtesan, dressed like an overzealous reject from Arabian Nights. Luckily the psychotic dictator trying to pass herself off as a director had been fine with letting her be covered from head to foot. The stomach of Rogue's costume was actually a flesh-colored leotard under the pants and sparkly bra-top, complete with fringes hanging down. It was all itchy as hell and made Rogue grumpier than she would have been anyway.

"Okay, Leo!" The dictator- er, director called out. "Say your line and we'll start the dance sequence. Rogue- you ready?"

"Yeah!" she called back through the curtain that was serving as a door on the House of Marcus Lycus.

"'For your most assured approval and your more than possible purchase,'" the sophomore in gold and pseudo-ancient Roman pimp attire recited, "'here are the fruits of my search. Behold... Tintinabula!'"

Rogue stifled a growl and stepped through the curtain and struck a "vocational pose."

"'Out of the East, with the face of an idol...the arms of a willow tree...and the pelvis of a camel,'" Leo finished the introduction.

The music started from the pit, a keening, thrumming, belly dance music that cued Rogue to start her dance. They had worked for weeks on this number, combining Rogue's gymnastic and martial arts background with some steps and movements from a booklet on learning belly dancing to create as provocative a scene on stage as Principal Kelley and the superintendent would allow- prudes that they were.

The music faded down and stopped. Rogue went back to her vocational pose and Ms. White exploded with joy.

"Yes! Rogue! Perfect! Better than that has ever been! Good job."

Rogue acknowledged the compliment with a half-hearted wave, secretly wishing she could just be done with it. Why did Kitty get the good part? One of only two female parts that had lines? True, it was the role of a ditzy blonde virgin whore, which almost fit Kitty perfectly, except for the 'virgin' part, especially since she'd dyed her hair blonde to get the part. But, damnit! Rogue wanted to be able to say something more than "Ooo!" while fawning over a jerk-off captain of the guard.

After being dismissed, Rogue just went backstage to wait out the rest of rehearsal until she was needed to fawn. Over two hours later, rehearsal let out for the night. Rogue quickly changed out of her costume and into her normal clothes, making sure to hang it up, and not to touch anyone else by accident. She washed her face and reapplied her own make-up. Waiting for Kitty would be the hard part of the night. She liked to socialize afterwards.

Unfortuantely, the only way Rogue was passing off staying late at school without letting on that she was in the musical was that she was Kitty's ride home, and she told everyone that she was doing her homework while watching practice. She waited outside the backstage door and listened to the tech crew joke around.

"Maggie, come screw this for me!" one girl called, a teasing smirk on her face while she held up a black drape to a piece of two-by-four.

"We should bring back the bier," a tiny blonde who reminded Rogue of a slouching wood-sprite said. The sole boy crew member looked quizzically at her. She rolled her eyes. "Not the BEER, the BIER!"

Rogue sighed heavily and went to look around for Kitty.

"Come on, girl!" she called into the green room. "Or Ah'm leavin' without ya!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" Kitty yelled back, grabbing her backpack. "By Billy! Call me! E-mail me! See you tomorrow!"

"Get ya tiny butt out ta the car!!!" Rogue snapped.

"Alright, sheesh," Kitty said. "Honestly, you could, like, gimme two seconds to say good-bye."

"Ya gonna see 'em at the crack o' dawn t'morrah, anyway," Rogue grumbled as she led the way to Jean's borrowed SUV. The girls chucked their bags into the back and tiredly climbed in.

"Why don't you like want anybody to know you're in the play?" Kitty asked from the passenger seat on their way home.

"Cuz it's not somethin' Ah want shouted around that Ah'm playin' a ho."

"You played, like, a vampire ho in Dracula," Kitty pointed out.

"Yeah, but the vampire thing saved it from me just bein' a slut," Rogue explained as she drove. "There's a big difference, trust me."

Kitty rolled her eyes and settled back in her seat.