A/N: Don't ask, LOL. I don't know where this one came from.

DISCLAIMER: LOTR/Shrek not mine.

ONE SHREK TO BRING THEM ALL

Chapter One – Elrond's Headache

The leaders of the free peoples of Middle Earth were sitting around, arguing over a stump.

Actually, it was the shiny thing that lay on the stump that garnered so much attention. The Ring of Power, forged by the Dark Lord himself, had been found.

This was Imladris, and Elrond had called a meeting of the Council to decide what should be done with the Ring.

Elrond himself was sitting on his throne, rubbing his throbbing temples. The Council had been arguing for the better part of the day. Mostly over which race should be chosen to bear the Ring to Mordor, where it could be destroyed.

Elrond sighed. The Elves were afraid the Ring would fall into the hands of the Dwarves. The Dwarves didn't want to let the Elves get it. The Men were outraged that a mere Ranger could be their King. Gandalf, the Grey Wizard, was trying in vain to restore order, using the Black Speech of Mordor.

And Elrond hadn't had a headache this bad since the Second Age. He was on the verge of taking the damn thing to Mordor himself, if it would shut everybody up and stop this foolishness.

Suddenly, there came a great roar that shook the ground and blew leaves off of the trees as it rang through the Council's meeting place.

"R-O-O-O-A-A-A-R-R-R!!!"

Everyone looked at Gandalf. "Not me!" He shook his head, bewildered.

Three small figures sprang from the bushes surrounding the Council. Two attached themselves to Elrond's legs. Merry and Pippin.

The third figure hurtled himself between Frodo and whatever had made that noise, shouting, "You shall not take him!" It was Sam.

Slowly, everyone turned to look at what had made that dreadful noise.

It was a huge green monster, with pointy horn-like ears and big teeth. It looked very angry.