Disclaimer: Don't own

How To Plan A Wedding To Your Blacksmith/Pirate Honey

1. Spend as much time as possible with your honey. You might feel a bit strange at first, but he did choose you over your perfect sister, so try to remember that.

2. Even though the remnants of whatever history your sister and your honey shared seem to linger, you should give your honey the benefit of the doubt. Of course, once your honey and your sister share an illicit kiss, it becomes obvious to you that you cannot stay.

3. Bringing your best friend (who just had a falling out with the esteemed Commodore of your port) flee home and join a roguish captain on a pirate ship to a secluded island where the island people will adopt you into their culture.

4. Your honey of course cannot bear to see you go, and he will join up with the pirates in an attempt to win your heart. You'll be cornered with him on a ship at sea and he'll do everything in his power to win you back - but you cannot take him back right away, no matter how good he looks shirtless and sweaty, swabbing the deck.

5. Thankfully the island will separate males and females, and you'll have some respite from having to see your honey in all his physical beauty. Of course, you'll have forgiven him somewhat by then, which you'll prove by sneaking out to see him in the middle of the night. Island custom forbids this, and you'll be punished in the morning, but it certainly was worth it.

6. After backbreaking labor and an initiation ceremony, you start to realize that the island customs are really quite beautiful and novel compared to your stuff English upbringing which you have struggled against all your life. A person from your past will arrive with the Commodore, demanding to marry you. Duel with him and win, and when the threat is over, propose to your honey.

7. You will marry your honey in an island ceremony, thereby ending your stay at the island. Sunburned and sore, but ultimately much happier than you have been in ages, you will return home for your real wedding.

8. Things will be understandably tense at home between you and your stuffy father, and especially between you and your sister. You will discover, slowly, that she had changed almost as much as you have, and that you are both independent and proud young women. She has given up any claims she once had on your honey, but even if she hadn't you would not feel threatened by her anymore.

9. Still, you want to plan your wedding as quickly as discreetly possible (things may have gotten a bit out of hand after your island wedding, after all.) Your sister, in an effort to repair what scraps of congeniality remain between the two of you, wishes to aid you in your wedding plans and since all speed is necessary, you agree.

10. Your second wedding is pulled off without a hitch, but perhaps more importantly your relationship with your prom queen of the Caribbean sister is on the way to recovery. Before your wedding, you suffer from a sudden bout of cold feet and risk being more than fashionably late by sitting on the beach and watching the surf roll in. Your sister finds you and drags you to your honey, where you proceed to get married and live as happily ever after as realistically possible.




Feeds any number of STILL infatuated teenage girls.